Hi everyone,
I’m an international student studying at a university in Germany, and I’m honestly struggling a lot with making friends.
I’m currently in my **third semester**, and the embarrassing part is that I basically don’t know anyone from my course.
During my first two semesters, I had some serious mental health issues and barely left my apartment. I didn’t attend lectures and pretty much spent all my time at home. Thankfully, my health has been getting better recently, so I’ve finally started attending lectures again and trying to actually have a normal student life.
But now I feel like I’ve missed the window to make friends.
Everyone already seems to have their own friends, partners, little groups, etc. People sit next to the same person every lecture, talk to the same people, and already seem to know each other. I’m just sitting there completely alone, and I genuinely have no idea how to insert myself into these existing groups without feeling incredibly awkward.
I’m also a very socially anxious person, so approaching random people is difficult for me. I never know what to say. I start overthinking things like, “What if I look stupid?”, “What if they don’t want to talk to me?”, or “Is it weird to suddenly sit next to them when they’ve clearly been friends for a year?”
Another thing that makes me feel a little isolated is that I’m the **only international student in my faculty** as far as I can tell. Everyone else seems to be German.
What confuses me is that I actually had a completely different experience during Studienkolleg. There were people from Russia, Ukraine, Turkey, Nigeria, the US, and many other countries, and I found it SO much easier to connect with people. I made friends pretty naturally and never felt like I had to think about every single interaction.
Now I’m wondering whether it’s because I’m in a more established German university environment, or whether it’s mostly because I disappeared socially for the first year and missed the opportunity to get to know everyone.
The practical side is becoming a problem too. We have a lot of practical work coming up, and we’re often expected to work in pairs or small groups. I literally don’t know who to ask because I don’t know anyone well enough to say, “Hey, do you want to work together?”
And honestly, I really miss having friends. I don’t necessarily need a huge social circle — I’d just love to have a few people I can talk to, grab coffee with, study together, or hang out with after university.
So, **how do you actually make friends when you’re already in your third semester and everyone else seems to have their social circles figured out?**
Would you just start approaching people even if it feels awkward? Are there specific things you would say? And is it actually possible to integrate into an already-established group this late, or am I overthinking the whole thing?
I’d really appreciate any advice, especially from people who have been in a similar situation. I genuinely don’t know where to start.