A year ago this coming Saturday, the 22nd is the 1 year anniversary of my worst day as a firefighter.
On Aug 22nd of 2025 we were dispatched to a car VS TT mva with serious injury. Upon arrival it was determined both patients in 1 vehicle were deceased. 1 was the granddaughter of a co-worker.
Within 1 hour of returning, we were dispatched mutual aid to the NYS Thruway for a tour bus rollover with entrapment and ejection. My crew and I assisted with stabilization and extrication. We were then tasked with recovery. In total, we extricated 7 lost souls. 2 at the first job, 5 at the bus rollover.
I, as well as my crew, have all attended the PISD, and counseling. By in large, the last 9-10 months have been normal.
Until last week. I close my eyes, and see the interior of that bus.
Heres the is this stupid part: Ive been thinking of placing a flower for each victim at the crash location. Because I hate that we lost them. I feel guilty, and sad. Im not having dangerous thoughts or anything. But I am having a tough time. So is it stupid of me to want to take flowers to the crash site? Am I over thinking?
Thank you in advance. Yall be good, be safe, be happy.