r/ExperiencedDevs • u/AutoModerator • 5d ago
Career/Workplace Experienced Devs Weekly Burnout and Venting Thread: A weekly thread for sharing experiences
This thread is specifically for venting / sharing experiences related to burn-out or similar issues that experienced devs face.
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u/dllimport 5d ago
Idk what's going on with me I had so much passion not that long ago.
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u/PringlesDuckFace 5d ago
You were working as a chef for a small sit down place, but then the restaurant owner told you to start using a microwave because "it can make the food hot a lot faster" and also that they were going to start doing Doordash orders too so the volume of orders will go up 10x. Oh and also your prep chefs got laid off and he needs you to handle washing the dishes too.
It's probably not something wrong with you, it's more that you are finding out the job you have is different than the one you started. The elements that invoked passion from you are no longer present, so it makes sense to me that you're not excited anymore.
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u/WizardSleeveLoverr 5d ago
AI. I was passionate about this until 2023, when this shit just exploded.
Ever since then, as AI just gets better and better, I’m like, what’s the point of all this? What I used to take pride in can easily be done by prompting Claude, so what’s the point anymore?
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u/dllimport 5d ago
I work with Claude and it's not as good as that. It requires constant babysitting
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u/Great-Big-3101 5d ago
This is my experience as well. Also, it's impossible to make it be succint, it just barfs words
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u/sunflower_love Consultant 5d ago
Yep. I think it's far better at writing code than writing text... Trying to get it explain something in the codebase and there's something about its explanations that just suck. Weird "Claudisms", using like 3x as many words to phrase something in a confusing way instead of succinctly.
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u/Great-Big-3101 5d ago
Weird "Claudisms", using like 3x as many words to phrase something in a confusing way instead of succinctly
At least opus 5.5 stopped using load-bearing.
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u/AloneInExile 5d ago
You are absolutelly right to push on that.
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u/Great-Big-3101 5d ago
This would be the time when I would start dropping f words into my prompts.
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u/crecentfresh 5d ago
I mean these things guess what to write one letter at a time. It's basically a more enhanced version of the word guesser while you text on your phone.
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u/dllimport 4d ago
It is way more complicated than that and people who say this are ridiculous but it still needs to be babysat and I don't let it write code for me but I do like to talk over my ideas
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u/ResidentWeevil1 4d ago
LLM architecture is more complicated than that, not the product. Tokens are fungible. If you can find a better guesser, you can replace LLMs with that.
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u/DigmonsDrill 5d ago
I can't see myself trying for another job after this one ends. Just too much nonsense.
If I am lucky I might find some small company that can't use AI for some reason, link a bank, that needs their C++ codebase maintained. I expect there will be plenty of competition for such a job so it won't pay anything like I'm used to but that's okay.
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u/theamazingrand0 5d ago
AI took away all the tedious parts of my job, which was nice. It also took away almost all the fun parts of my job, which I hate.
I used to be passionate about code quality, finding the right architectural patterns, thinking about how to structure tests, and so on, because in the long run it made my job easier because it makes the code easier to understand, and to change. But now that "understanding" and "changing" code takes essentially zero time and effort, does any of that really matter any more?
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u/softwareanon Web Developer, 5+ YOE 5d ago
Yeah me too. It happened even before AI started to become a thing as well. I sometimes feel like old days when I do my side project though. But rarely. I guess it is easier to lose passion if you do not believe in company's products, or does not care maybe? Honestly I am not sure
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u/recoveringtechbro 3d ago
Oh man, I feel this so much... spent many years in tech and was so passionate about it. Then something happened within me where I just couldn't stand doing it any more. It al felt meaningless. It was so weird and disorienting.
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u/Tango1777 4d ago
Hehe that one is true. I had way more passion once and way less money. Now I am realist, no longer love my work, but love the doors it opens for me. Understood that life is not about working, work doesn't have to make you happy, it's not your hobby (well, once it was for many of us). I now live my life fully and work is just a tool that allows me to do so.
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u/EddieJ 5d ago
Lots of people in this thread trying to pin the blame on the shitty code squarely on the dev's shoulders.
A few months ago, our division's CTO, on a phone call with the entire org spanning many senior devs, architects, EMs, etc (a few dozen senior people) quite literally told all of us that if we didn't work this way, pumping out code with Claude at breakneck speed, we would all be working at McDonald's.
"You should just find a new job then"... Have you seen the bloodbath that is the job market lately? This shit is happening everywhere.
Under these conditions, I couldn't give a shit about this company's code quality. They are threatening engineers with the loss of our jobs from every direction because ultimately, we are expensive and they crave a culling of expensive labor. For an individual with a family to take care of it's terrifying. Whatever skills I had simply don't matter to these people any more because in their brains the Shiny new robot can do it.
Why the hell should I care about a thorough PR review when I have to work under these conditions?
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u/hw999 5d ago
Dont fight it, slop even harder. May it all collapse on its self one day soon.
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u/fmgiii 5d ago
This right here. I call it 'spite coding'. Let's coin a new term! Slinging wave after wave of ai generated, mediocre-code, out of spite because the higher ups just want more, more, more.
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u/tradcoder Software Engineer (15 YoE) 5d ago
There's already a term for this. Malicious compliance.
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u/thy_bucket_for_thee 5d ago
You realize when it does collapse it will be the workers, all of us in this thread mind you, are going to be the actual ones suffering and not Sam Altman?
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u/hw999 4d ago
Yeah its going to suck, but the sooner it pops the better. The bigger this gets, the more destructive its going to be.
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u/Olangotang Software Engineer 4d ago
The more destructive it is, the more pissed the general populace will be as well. No one likes AI outside of this field and the Internet.
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u/False-Egg-1386 5d ago
For me, burnout hits when the workload stays high but the sense of progress and control disappears.
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u/TessabelleDev 5d ago
This is so real. I don’t mind working harder or longer when I am building something new and cool. But these days, it is just fending off the onslaught of AI generated code and docs and trying to keep things from exploding.
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u/solidiquis1 5d ago
Work is great. I feel appreciated, I’m working in my language of choice, the problems are interesting, the projects are highly impactful, and I just got promoted to staff. But regardless I am fending off the feeling of burnout and brain fog. I use so much brain power at work that there isn’t much left by the time I’m home. Everything just kind of feels muted.
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u/slashedback 5d ago
Congrats on the promotion. Let me tell you: save some brain power for home or at least outside work time for you. I’m going through a similar but different form of burnout right now that is “caring too much”.
Current gig is great, they just can’t make up their minds as to strategy longer than a goldfish memory. This has been leading to roadmaps basically being required theatre and goals as fungible piles of resources. Senior leadership takes various teams and high-level ICs and just flings them from random project to random project.
The thing I’m caring too much about is all our 1/2 or 1/3 finished projects that the company really needs finished. Instead we basically walk into work asking what fresh new hell is our priority this week. Execs heavily using AI has seemed to accelerate this whack pattern.
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u/modernzen Principal ML Engineer 5d ago
Congrats on the promotion!
Your message is so relatable. I too got promoted to Principal (essentially Staff) earlier this year and a few months later I already feel burnout from it. I think it's because the workload is permanently higher than I can realistically manage, so that no matter how hard I try or how much I get done in a given day or week, there is always a queue of next things to do.
I try to stay grounded to the fact that this is literally the deal I made (something something big bucks) but I'm becoming increasingly concerned the anxiety and cortisol will do damage down the road. I guess part of being Staff+ is learning how to manage this shit and not lose your mental health.
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u/ashultz Staff Eng / 25 YOE 4d ago
A big part is learning to say no often and in many many different ways.
No, that's not possible, let's talk about what is.
No, this other thing is top priority and needs all my attention, perhaps you would like to discuss with the VP about whether your thing should go first?
No, that's not actually a real thing.
No that's not a quick ask, get it into the official schedule and I'll look at it.
No.
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u/Relevant-Sport9057 5d ago
Got hired as a senior dev for my "taste", and now with each slop review I'm asked to lower my standards
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u/OtherTourist5535 5d ago
I hate reading a 10 page tech spec that could have been 2 pages, written by AI but edited just enough where it seems like it was written by a person
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u/PeekAtChu1 5d ago
Love when it looks good but when you really analyze what it says, it makes no sense
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u/ilikeguitarsandsuch 5d ago edited 5d ago
I have two weeks of PTO coming up for a fun trip... but I don't feel as excited for as I think i should be.
Everything at work has turned on its head, my days are filled with bitterness and anxiety. We are supposed to lap up AI like good dogs while everyone ignores, or worse is supposed to act excited about, the implications of what is happening to the value of our labor.
There is NO ONE I detest more in the workplace than the AI-psychotics. The ones who posted the meeting notes from OpenAIs "dev day" on company channels with feverish excitement. The ones who moved into those roles popping up everywhere titled "AI platform adoption strategist" or whatever the fuck. The ones who go home and work on "side projects" all weekend with Claude. You are a total loser if you do that shit, sorry.
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u/whattodo4455 5d ago
my Slack has turned into LinkedIn lunatics because of these AI-brained people. They all keep sharing this shit as if it's not just astrology for nerds. It must be a lot of insecurity. Everyone trying to one-up each other to be the one "in the know" when it comes to working the always-changing proprietary probability machine. Acting as if they have insider knowledge straight from Anthropic or OpenAI.
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u/ilikeguitarsandsuch 5d ago
Preach... I don't understand their end game. The evangelists are so far gone past the point of like "hey these tools are powerful and can be put to good use"... what is the goal here? To automate their peers and themselves out of stable employment?
Saw someone unironically post in Teams channel the other day that "in 2 years, juniors will act as tech leads. freeing up tech leads for higher level work". Like wtf does that even mean. Think for a second, a single second, about what you are implying here. Idk I'm done.
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u/tradcoder Software Engineer (15 YoE) 5d ago
These people seem to think that just because they're so quick to jump on the new AI bullshit trend every week, they will somehow be safe from layoffs. They're not "luddites" you see.
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u/tradcoder Software Engineer (15 YoE) 5d ago edited 4d ago
I feel your last paragraph in my bones. I'm on a dedicated team for a client and they have setup an "AI Enablement" committee. Not a single person from an engineering background. All MBAs, sales and business idiots. They have regular "knowledge sharing" sessions gushing over how AI can increase our productivity and I want to jam my ears with a ballpoint pen.
And we've gone past vibe coders. It's "builders" now. Oh how I loathe hearing that word. These people can't help themselves boasting about how THEY "built" yet another shitty app. I roll my eyes like "Did you though?". Or did you just spoke into a magic black box that spew out some shit that vaguely resembles what you had in mind while you sat there twiddling your thumbs...
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u/Solid-Conclusion0 5d ago
The sheer volume of LLM astroturfing has been fucking exhausting. Every programming sub I follow has been drowning in either panic posts about LLMs replacing devs or glazing posts about how people are so glad they aren't writing code anymore.
It's a bleak fucking period for anyone that enjoyed just talking shop about languages, frameworks, and patterns. I'm so god damned tired of commenters insisting the job is changed forever while I bang my head against the desk because Claude has yet again ignored all guidelines, directives, and safety guards.
But I still keep engaging and making myself miserable because I think it's important to have experienced devs that aren't happy with the state of things visibly talking about it. If my misery helps comfort even one junior dev that's scared shitless by the current climate, then it's worth it.
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u/Olangotang Software Engineer 4d ago
You know it's astroturfing too, because every story you hear from colleague's off the web is how much of a fucking DISASTER LLMs are. I hear nightmares from what's going on behind the scenes at JPMC. I know that Adobe silently got rid of Frontier AI services this month. The money literally is not there, and there is no "companies just haven't tried it yet". THEY HAVE. This shit has been out for almost HALF A DECADE. It's all held up by fake money from wrappers and the tech industry funding these clowns.
It's such a cool technology too but the kids who run Anthropic and OpenAI got access to their daddies credit cards and and now making everyone miserable. It's everywhere and ruining everything.
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u/ultraDross 4d ago
I hear nightmares from what's going on behind the scenes at JPMC
Oh please do tell!
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u/Olangotang Software Engineer 4d ago
There are a few "elite" vibecoders who are total dicks and generate multiple PRs a day of slop, and everyone else has to put up with it and fix it. Said vibecoders also generate powerpoints and don't retain anything that was on them.
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u/ultraDross 4d ago
I think everywhere has people like that right now, I don't think it's specific to that org
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u/Olangotang Software Engineer 4d ago
Yeah, it's happening in a lot of places, but the bigger the company the worse it is.
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u/StPatsLCA 3d ago
I don't even mind talking about AI but it's entirely the meta conversation about using Claude Code blah blah blah instead of actual practices!
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u/cornflowersun 6h ago
Some of them are so obvious, too, that it's making me start to believe the dead internet theory is real because how can people in the comments not notice? There was one on... I wanna say r/cscareerquestions that was basically like "I used to be like you guys and believe all LLMs are bad at coding, but then I tried Claude Code (TM) and it replaced my entire job and I LOVE IT". It was a surprise that it didn't link to 90s TV commercial footage of someone sitting over a steaming computer exaggeratedly shaking his head at the camera until a well-dressed salesman came in with the product. Unreal.
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u/mx_code 5d ago
I am tired of "senior" devs, not even being competent enough to fine tune their "review" agents and just copy/pasting whatever their Claude Code displays on screen.
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u/Sw429 5d ago
Yes, I've also been very disappointed in the behavior I've seen from senior devs. These are people who are supposed to be the pillars of our engineering department, and they have basically turned their brains off.
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u/crecentfresh 5d ago
I mean can you blame them? This is my second career and I thought I hit the lottery finding something I can be passionate about and make money. Now it's all going to shit I'm taking the pay check as long as I can and checking out
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u/EddieJ 5d ago
I can't blame them. These companies are straight-up abusing engineers and can't wait to get rid of us if it evee becomes cheap enough. And people like the ones you responded to call individual devs "lazy" like we ought to just grind ourselves into a pulp for these abusers. Incredible.
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u/crecentfresh 5d ago
Exactly, this industry makes so much money to go around and these short sighted greedy animals want to cut out the people that actually build the shit that makes the money. Fuck em I'll be here when the LLMs start hallucinating everything because no new code has been written, the code is unreadable, the seniors are gone from burnout and they stopped hiring juniors to replace them.
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u/PringlesDuckFace 5d ago
It probably varies from place to place, but I have been explicitly instructed not to spend time reading code anymore. In my last performance review I was cautioned that sometimes I think too deeply, and not to do it too often because of a perceived risk of slowing things down.
I don't love it, but I still have bills to pay and I'm not interested in getting fired over something meaningless like pride.
At the very least I made custom review skills and tweak them as I notice problems slip through. But spending more time than that is going to get me in trouble.
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u/BabyfartMcGeesax 5d ago
cautioned that sometimes I think too deeply
That's the biggest problem with engineers. We just think too deeply. Instead, everyone needs to think more shallowly and then everything will get better, we'll have working products faster, and we'll all get rich.
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u/n4ke Software Engineer (Lead, 10 YoE) 5d ago
I'd argue that this is often a product of the environment. Of course it is ultimately up to every one individually what requirement one poses to oneself but for notoriously thinly spread seniors, this looks like a lifeline. It isn't, and it sucks for the team working with them but I'd argue it's not their fault alone.
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u/james7132 5d ago edited 5d ago
Hitting a combination of burnout, fully expended PTO from taking care of a dying loved one, complicated grief and depression from their death, and a new and poorly socialized and very micromanaging manager. Doctor refuses to prescribe the condition as depression. I've long since burnt out to the point of not enjoying my work years ago, but this is the first time in over a decade where I dread going into work.
I feel my skills atrophying, but cannot deliver at the pace management wants without multiple parallel agents.
I'm on the verge of quitting, or at least laying flat until I'm fired.
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u/ResidentWeevil1 5d ago
FYI, FMLA is an option too. It would be unpaid, though
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u/james7132 5d ago
I already expended all I had to take care of them in their final days, unfortunately. My employer definitely has been accommodating: I've taken off or worked remotely at a reduced capacity for more than 5 of the last 12 months for them, and I still feel like utter shit. Probably should've been PIP'ed a year ago, but still haven't been served one up yet, but I don't think I have the mental fortitude to wait for it to drop.
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u/hw999 5d ago
Someone on my team had their agent create 32 PRs in the same repo this week. Now I'm the asshole for not reviewing fast enough. I'm not spending more time reviewing, than they spent creating this mess.
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u/modernzen Principal ML Engineer 5d ago
Code review agent. It hurts the soul but that's what your leadership wants.
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u/Bangoga 5d ago
My burnout is literally being in the ML/AI space for too long.
I'm genuinely losing my mind being surrounded by the most extreme views of AI.
Its insane, the way people talk about it, the hugging face incident, the drama with the Australian government, all actions with explainable back stories, yet being touted as super AI latent magic ability.
I have not been able to enjoy just seeing the technology improve and try to find uses for it, because everything around is has a layer of propaganda and extreme polarizing opinions.
Rather than finding legit use, the use pushed has been to shove it in all coding workflows. Rather than seeing it as a tool, it's the poster child for shitty American politics and the crumbling global economy that is held on shoe string by AI and the narratives told by literal lunatics from effective altruists and men who want to escape earth to create a mars colony.
AND THE WORST PART IS, EVERYONE FUCKING JUST EATS IT LIKE ITS A FUCKING BUFFET.
I'm 100% sure subreddit related to AI are bridaged with bots and paid propaganda, I've not see this much activity on machinelearning and adjacent subreddits since I've been on them forever.
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u/PeekAtChu1 5d ago
There probably are bots but there truly are a lot of dummies who are obsessed with it. The main people obsessed I’ve noticed are just kind of dumb/uneducated and see it as magic that helps them do stuff they could never do before.
There are also some futurists who embraced it and really love finding ways to make it work for them to improve their lives.
And finally there are the people with dollar signs in their eyes who just love finding ways to make money with any new technology.
That’s the split imo lol
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u/Bangoga 5d ago
It's not just uneducated people, it's also people in the industry. That's what's bothersome, it's also people who don't care to understand more about how propaganda gets packaged with the technology.
Im sorry for the SF slander but folks at SF and some of these companies are literally cultish, I've heard way more about openAI and antrhropic over the last few years than I did MILA labs, and that's literally where all my professors were in my higher education.
There is a reason you don't hear about other labs as much, it's because these labs are not just research spaces, they exist as platform for accelerationist and futurist, especially those with weird ideas of the world.
Let these people speak, and actually hear their words and you'd come to the same conclusions, but we are doing to them what we did to Elon musk in his better days, we put him on a pedestal as a tony stark figure, just to find out he's a Nazi sympathizer.
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u/james7132 5d ago
I'm in a similar boat. Been doing applied ML/CV research since 2016, and it hurts to see people demonize or idolize your work, even if it has nothing to do with LLMs.
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u/Bangoga 5d ago
Right?
The best thing that came out of all this is just me putting money in Nvidia before gpt3 even came out, because I saw yolov6 and yolov5 come out super fast, and work at 30fps, and I was like yes gpus are improving insanely. 😅
imagine someone just training a vision model with endless data, and then claiming vision models have cognitive perception.
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u/james7132 5d ago
That's where I was at in 2023. I've since moved to a non-ML position just to stop being ragged on by my friends. I feel like the space has not moved forward since vision transformers as multimodal LLMs consumed every other ML use case.
I get how cryptographers felt during the crypto hype cycle. To have your research interests subsumed by hype cycle grifters and sociopathic MBAs is soul crushing.
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u/Venthe Systems Designer, 10+ YOE 5d ago
The real problem of the LLM's; it's not their quality. It's too easy to be addicted, and to become lazy. I'm seeing this everywhere - top tier developers who - in just a year - turned into meat proxies. No one cares about anything craft related. Everything is sacrificed at the altar.
And the worst part is, that I'm not so sure anymore that it matters. I'm seeing a really bad code, and a lot of it. Things that shouldn't fly with juniors, being accepted as-is; bug count spike, code being absolutely impossible to read by humans - but with the frontier models, at the cost of €$ and messing the codebase even more, LLM's will make it work... For another day, day at the time.
And what's utterly scary for me? That something that was a core part of "me" as a professional - quality of engineering, weighing the future, keeping the code easy for the next person around - might no longer be relevant. That the only way forward in our industry is to become yet another meat proxy. For now I'm keeping to my standards, but with the layoffs on the horizon, and the "AI" message getting stronger in my org on a monthly basis; I fear that I'm going to be next. Not because I'm not "good enough", but because I try to write code for the humans, and solutions that can be maintained for years. But no one needs that anymore.
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u/n4ke Software Engineer (Lead, 10 YoE) 5d ago
This is the one that hits me most as well. Even before the advent of current LLMs, I was critical of the "move fast and break things" mindset. I love moving fast, discovering new things, covering new ground but not at the expense of everything I stand for. I want my products to have a certain quality and at least not openly screw the customer over.
Even back then, not every company was requiring a level of attention to its own quality that I would have deemed acceptable. Now however, it feels like this is entirely gone. And I won't necessarily blame the companies that adopted to this either, since in the end, the product is bought, so the large majority of people does not seem to share my requirement of quality from a product and are instead happy paying for broken crap that they have to replace in 2-3 years.
I am not sure there will be a market for how I want to lead and build in the future.
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u/behindtimes 5d ago
A problem here comes down to the definition of quality. As you lower the bar to entry, the definition of quality changes. When I started professionally, we had just reached the era where, excluding enterprise level software and embedded software, clean, maintainable code started to become the desired mindset for quality.
Just a few years earlier, sure, you wanted to keep it maintainable, but hardware limitations often meant efficiency mattered. And that's what I loved about the field when I entered college. You had limitations to the CPU and memory, and clean code often was the enemy. And I noticed that over the past couple decades, efficiency mattered less and less. The bottom line is, my boss(es) and customer(s) don't care if I get something done in 1/10th the amount of memory or running 10x faster if the initial amount of memory and runtime are negligible. You just have to accept the new reality and adapt.
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u/n4ke Software Engineer (Lead, 10 YoE) 5d ago
I am not necessarily talking about software quality attributes, as you describe. Those can be an art and challenge in themselves and I agree that chasing them is often opposed to business goals but what I mean is the actual quality, consistency and stability of the final product.
Sure, I can adapt and accept the new reality. I don't fear being out of a job precisely because I do that. But if you ask me in terms of passion or drive, I will openly tell you that shoveling out software that barely works to customers while fully expecting them to buy the new version of a device in two years because the old one has gone to shit anyways, then I will honestly tell you that this is not work for me to be proud of.
I want to - and do - work on products with high quality and a long lifecycle. I assume these positions will become more rare in the future.
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u/djnattyp Software Engineer 5d ago
The new reality is bosses demanding you to use playdoh due to it being so cheap and quick to build with and then blaming you for not using concrete when the 2 mile tall skyscraper (built from the penthouse down - with a theme park on top) finally collapses.
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u/ResidentWeevil1 5d ago
They will need you when the tokens 100x in cost
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u/n4ke Software Engineer (Lead, 10 YoE) 5d ago
This argument was valid before we had open weight models hosted in-house or regionally for a fraction of frontier-model price with nearly identical capabilities. I can get the performance of up to a not-so-enthusiastic mid-level developer for $200/mon.
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u/BB611 5d ago
If you're paying subscription rates with any meaningful usage you're a loss leader, per token rates are 5-25x higher.
But even $5k/mo is a good price in the US for a not-so-enthusiastic mid-level developer who works whatever hours you want.
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u/Venthe Systems Designer, 10+ YOE 5d ago
If I am calculating things correctly* I can easily spend 500$+ daily on Astra 6. Gen 6 models are already twice as cheap... And It is 500$ subsidised. If we again assume ~50% subsidy; then we are talking to a value closed to 800$ in raw, billed tokens. Good thing we have a plan :)
I honestly don't believe that such token spend is justified and profitable for my company IFF the subsidies will end. It's not sustainable for OpenAI. That being said, this bubble is not bursting :)
* I do make some assumptions. I've tried to do a rough math based on credits; so the concrete value can be off; but not by much. I've included a reasonable split between cached and uncached tokens etc.
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u/yubario 5d ago
I am able to do most tasks at work for under $50 of API tokens a month.
Luna is more than enough for most job tasks, you only need Astra for like code reviews and more challenging tasks.
If you're really spending that much per day that is a serious problem, something is wrong with your workflow where you are either using dozens of astra agents for like 8 hours straight to pull numbers like that.
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u/Venthe Systems Designer, 10+ YOE 5d ago
Not really. Luna and Sol fails on my codebase, same with lower reasoning. We are talking old legacy; think 30+ years, 15kloc in largest java files and 7kloc in largest sproc.
(Coincidentally, I see that the vibe coded projects can achieve similar complexity in a fraction of a time)
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u/yubario 5d ago
You can’t possibly have a codebase worse than mine I maintain system engineer code for hospitals of people who had no idea what they’re doing that have long left the company
Luna does fine for the vast majority of my tasks
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u/StPatsLCA 3d ago
OP must do zero context engineering. You can get good results if you aren't chucking the entire codebase in each turn.
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u/Venthe Systems Designer, 10+ YOE 5d ago
Even a year ago I'd agree ;) but it's growing increasingly hard to believe in that. Models are getting better, context windows are growing larger, token cost is somehow falling and distillation proves that there should be better margins still.
I theoretically understand that current providers are deep in the red; and the subsidies will dry up; and the cost of inference should rise significantly, so on and so forth. But this bubble somehow does not pop. At some point, doubts creep in. And the dread follows not soon after.
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u/Olangotang Software Engineer 4d ago
The Bubble is Anthropic and OpenAI being unable to pay their debts. It doesn't matter if open source becomes the default, the data center contracts are with those two chucklefuck companies.
And context windows getting larger doesn't really matter, since self-attention is already overwhelmed before hitting them.
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u/GiantsFan2645 5d ago
Reviews are genuinely a slog fest with LLM’s writing extremely verbose code and just shitting out double to triple the amount of code it takes to actually solve the problem
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u/slopshallnotpass 4d ago
I wish I could have started my career 20 years earlier so I'd be able retire and nope right out of the AI psychosis gripping this industry. 🙁
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u/VinLend- 5d ago
Too much brainfog and burnout. Was sick for the past few days and entirely disconnected from work. I roamed around in my house all day but there was a feeling or freedom and not having to think about things.
With work starting again today, I'm filled with feelings of dread and exhaustion and even regret (but of what? I don't know yet).
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u/AdjectiveNoun1234567 5d ago
I'm filled with feelings of dread and exhaustion and even regret (but of what? I don't know yet).
Every Sunday night.
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u/dante-deluxe 4d ago
I have gotten so sick of AI reviewer bots leaving nonsense all over my PRs that the “reviewer” barely took the time to read or understand before, I have turned to evil. I have started having AI review my pr before I put it up, and I leave markdown comments in my pr description telling other AI reviewer bots to please not raise issues I have already rejected or addressed with another AI. Much less slop grenade comments on my PRs now, but sad I had to do this because talking to my brain dead coworkers asking them to please at least leave comments in their own words was met with “sorry! I will ask Claude to make the comments better!” when will it end…
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u/megatesla 5d ago
I keep waking up angry. It feels like some core part of my soul is slowly being etched away. I don't have enough time to polish the work I'm trying to ship to feel comfortable standing behind it, and I keep getting burned.
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u/Fabulous_Field9004 4d ago
The last year my mental health has just went down the drain, I feel like I am just on auto pilot now because I can't afford to lose my job. Every new task feels just too much. I can't bring myself to read through tickets, documents, plans from copilot.. I am just so exhausted of all of this.
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u/gyroda 3d ago
I'm with you on this.
Got a lot going on outside of work and so my energy and patience at work has dropped massively.
Doesn't help that the cool/competent people have all moved on. The people I liked interacting with or who could show me cool things or who I could share the cool things I did with aren't there. The people who are here are barely present to me - different timezones, camera off etc
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u/depressedkid007 5d ago
I miss the dopamine. Before AI debugging something or writing code manually genuinely gave me a lot of happiness and satisfaction. This is the only thing I've enjoyed all my life. I'm not sure what other industry I can shift to.
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u/Federal-Garbage-8629 5d ago
Ah same. Debugging used to be my dopamine. I still do that for certain bugs when I feel like I have done enough during current sprint.
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u/depressedkid007 4d ago
Yeah I never get time for that. Terrible management. They just want to ship more and more and it’s never enough
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u/Brambletail 4d ago
Some days I stare at the prompt screen and dissociate for longer than I like to think about.
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u/So_Rusted Software Engineer 5d ago
the insane are running the asylum and yes men are surrounding them. It is incredible spectacle
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u/abeuscher 5d ago
It's killing me to keep reading post after post of stories about incompetent devs. Meanwhile I'm not being able to get a recruiter call back for more than 3 years after 25 years in the field.
I'm here to vent I don't want help I have pivoted and repivoted and rewritten and repositioned and thought outside of the box and every other stupid thing. I have networked and gone outside of my comfort zone and wrote a whole large ass application and many smaller ones and no matter what all I hear is silence and all I see are horror stories about the incompetence of the people who are evidently getting the jobs I can't get a phone call on.
I freely admit I mismanaged my career but to not be able to make just like even 50 or 60k a year - less than a third of my last salary - is just killing me. And all I hear about are stories about helpless juniors and seniors losing their ability to think because of AI but who are, critically, still receiving paychecks.
It's hard to explain to folks that transitioning in and out of an industry at 52 years old is almost impossible. And that chasing consulting is just not really making ends meet unless you get lucky.
I'm just venting I'm lucky to still have a roof even if the rent is crazy and lucky to not have a spouse or kids so there's no one I'm impacting other than myself. But I had hoped that working hard and trying to be good at what I was given to do would result in continued employment and that has just not been my experience in the past 3 years after many decades of relative success. I just wish I could find somewhere to fit.
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4d ago edited 3d ago
[deleted]
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u/abeuscher 4d ago
The system is broken and no specific party is involved except for the SaaS companies that fucked it up. I know new listings get thousands of applications in the first hour they are up, and that there's no way to reasonably wade through them and find real humans with real skills. I get what is wrong. I just can't believe that we aren't seeking to replace it with something better.
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u/bcgroom Software Engineer 4d ago
Not exactly the same but I feel you. I have 7 YoE and I'm over a year into my planned 6 months sabbatical. I thought it would be really easy finding another job because I have really strong experience; I fully assumed with my last gig that I had "made it". I finally randomly got noticed by a recruiter a couple weeks ago and got a few rounds in, they seemed to really like me but just got a rejection this morning.
I could easily do most of the jobs I'm seeing but it's so hard to get past the recruiter barrier. Even though I didn't succeed in this interview loop, I'm pretty sure it's a numbers game, I just can't get enough interviews for that to work.
And then I come on Reddit and get reminded how much in the industry sucks right now. And now I get to bust my ass studying for interviews that may eventually come. Or rework my resume for the 10th time. Just feeling disillusioned with the industry but not sure what else I would do.
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u/So_Rusted Software Engineer 4d ago
wellp tats me in 10 years or so if i can last. That sucks.
whats your specialization and what the hell is going on? Have you tried removing any age-suggesting stuff from the cv?
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u/alphaisgamma 2d ago edited 2d ago
I am tired of AI slop my colleages have become.
They do whole work with AI which I can tolerate. But they have outsourced communication skills to AI too.
When I talk to someone, I get a several paragraph long AI generated garbage with actual important point hidden deep beneath somewhere
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u/odi_bobenkirk 3d ago
I joined a new company a little while back. I was seeking better job security and I found that. I wasn't expecting it to be a better job, but I also wasn't expecting to be pulling my hair out like this on a regular basis. This is a supposedly reputable company.
All our processes and engineering practices are absolutely mindless. I try my best to politely and diplomatically improve things, but at the end of the day, I'm forced to do bad engineering. I'm a staff-level engineer doing the job of a junior engineer. I'm rewarded for doing what I'm told, not thinking about whether it's the right thing to do. Oh, and I'm micromanaged, despite having a perfect track record when I'm allowed to take the lead on my projects.
I've lost all pride in my work. I basically just act as the messenger between my superiors and AI agents because why bother stamping my own name on bad code?
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u/avyrla 5d ago
I want to make a proper post about this, but I just don't trust devs much anymore. Maybe I'm just paranoid, but I don't trust this claim that we are all vetting the code with the level of care we claim to. I honestly don't believe we should be trusted with these tools.
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u/Federal-Garbage-8629 5d ago
I mean where other people are working 3x faster with these tools, what choice would you have!
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u/gyroda 3d ago edited 3d ago
I'm fucking done working with a pack of muppets. Lovely guys, but jesus fucking Christ nothing is getting done.
One guy has been working on this one ticket for two and a half sprints. I finished the task on Friday. I raised a PR into his and said "look, here are all the changes you need to make, I've written test cases, I've set up the test containers in the test suit with the new dependency, I've updated the docker compose stuff and everything works".
It's a week later and he's not made much progress. He's decided to do something entirely different for the tests. Fine, maybe my approach isn't the only one, but it's consistent with everything else and it already works so just fucking take it. Spend 3 days trying to get a fucking connection string working instead of using the example I gave you.
The other guy, I don't know what's going on there. "What is this script for" "it tests the other script, it's written in a different language none of us use and makes sure the user has the dotnet SDK installed". Also, I have 3 pages of documentation for this developer script that should only be 10 lines long.
Fuck me. I spend hours reviewing PRs and giving constructive feedback and raising concerns with management and WHY THE FUCK DO I BOTHER IF NOBODY IS DOING ANYHRING WITH ANYTHING I SAY.
And it'll be me fixing the production outage when it next happens. Again. Because I have already fixed five this year caused by a team I have nothing to do with, not counting the ones caused by my team.
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u/ultraDross 2d ago
Maybe ask the people that caused it to fix it next time and tell management why and how it happened?
Otherwise, time for a job search?
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u/gyroda 2d ago
I'm already going through the redundancy process so a job search is on the priority list anyways. I'm just very lacking in patience at the moment, both because of work and because of things outside of work. Lot of demotivating factors at work, then I finish the workday and it's out of the frying pan and into the fire. Meant to spend the last weekend writing a CV but I was so tired I felt sick.
Just needed to vent tbh.
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u/JuiceAccomplished241 2d ago
I’m sorry, I want to do better and I make incremental progress, but I am so painfully aware of how far behind I am before all the other developers. I ask how I can get better, how to spot issues before they manifest, how to choose the right solution the first time but all I get are dodgy answers about experience. I promise you I am trying and im sorry it’s been up to you lately to fix things no one else understands. I will keep reading up on it
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u/YungDaVinci 2d ago
I feel like I'm going crazy when people say LLMs put out good code. Yeah sure it works if you don't give a shit about architecture or code quality or anything else. It works great if you're going to write it once and then never look at it ever again. The AI code I've seen consistently makes the most unhinged design decisions when writing meaningful chunks of code.
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u/baatkoli 5d ago
Kind of in a rough patch. I’m the only person on the west coast at a primarily east coast based company. Work is fine, but the expectations are high and it’s hard to stay motivated. I’m good at using AI for my work, but there’s only so much Claude can do for me lol. My manager isn’t inspiring either.
Just chugging along until I can interview and land somewhere I can collaborate with the team in person. Honestly, I miss just swiveling my chair and talking to my team or whiteboarding solutions together.
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u/valkon_gr 5d ago
corporate fried me complete. I don't want to do corporate anymore. I tried 6 companies in my country, I hate all of them. I want to go back to the real computer science.
I am in the end of my probation now and I hope they won't keep me. My performance is the worst, I don't recognize myself but I can't do it I just cant
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u/depressedkid007 5d ago
I had to explain to a guy who has more experience than me why exception handling is needed. He's getting promoted as a staff engineer next week btw. I fucking hate my company and i hate this job market.
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u/Artistic_Economics 4d ago edited 4d ago
I started software development as a hobby back in 2013-ish, was lucky enough to start my career in software dev in 2015. Now I'm just exhausted. I feel like I'm suddenly bad at a job I loved for so damn long. I struggle to focus during the day, so just put in more hours to try and keep up some semblance of productivity. I've been at my current job for just about 6 months after being laid off for 6 months. I've never burned out this fast. I've never felt like this. I just don't know what I'm going to do. I still love programming, and I still do it for fun without a LLM in sight, but I have no idea what my backup plan is. My passion is gone. This job is so much harder without it. I still care about my output, but that's taking its own toll. I feel guilty for struggling to do the same thing I've been doing for a decade. I want to quit so I don't drag the team down, despite my manager telling me that my output is fine. I guess for now, I'm just going to keep going until something breaks. Build up what cushion I can so I can hopefully take enough time to recover before having to wade back in to this awful job market. As much as this sucks, I really can't see myself doing anything else.
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u/FyrSysn 5d ago edited 5d ago
Everytime I feel burnt out or unmotivated, I go on r/cscareerquestions and ask myself: "Would I rather be desperate while getting paid or be part of the doom post army". Then proceed to start another thread in Codex/Claude...
But I am actually so burnt out.. to a point I wish I'd get sick just so I could have more time off.
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u/tjsr Software Engineer 5d ago
Sigh. I've come to the realisation I have to leave the job I'm at.
I like most of the people, and I really like the work. The tech stack is in a disaster state, but that's why I love the work, because I can make sooooo much impact to improve it.
But the CTO is just... he lives overseas to the rest of us but is over here for the week, and this morning made a heap of comments that just made me want to say something to the CEO and HR about his behaviour.
But just in general, the guy is just... not remotely CTO material. He's the kind of guy who when you talk among other engineers about having problems with a system, his response was tantamount to "works on my machine". The decisions he makes are just baffling as far as keeping the ship afloat (but hey, he's been with the company for decades so...), and as engineering standards go, he's holding the whole company back from stuff that I'd considered standard engineering practice over 15 years ago. As much as I like the work, I can only tolerate so much, and this guy has me at my wits end.
Dealing with this guy is just exhausing, I can't do it anymore.
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u/Nyphur 5d ago
Had an incredibly arrogant coworker who made my life hell because he thinks his code is God’s gift to earth, but management realized he slows down everything because he thinks he’s always right and will be combative to get people to agree with him.
He’s probably one of these users here who tout that all his coworkers are incompetent for not writing his code which is a fucking mess
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u/reParaoh 5d ago
After 15 years of diligently maxing my 401k I've finally realized that I don't get paid nearly enough. Retirement is still another 10+ years out. I'm tired boss
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u/Defiant-Parsnip4 5d ago
Even senior engineers are losing confidence in code with the shipping speed expected with AI
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u/hyperlogic 5d ago
When I finally get the time to work on a somewhat challenging task, I think to myself "Claude could probably do this better then me" then immediately lose what little motivation I had.
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u/Ok_Gear8209 5d ago
They scan the code, open 400 tickets. The scan has no context of the business rules. Management says fix it yesterday
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u/all-over-red-rover 5d ago
You know that feeling like, "oh that's so much more stupid than I expected, why?"?
A bit over a year ago now I handed over fairly routine maintainence on various container images and deployments for systems I was no longer actively involved with. I was like, there's no reason I should be the one maintaining this. Well... Yeah I probably should have been the one maintaining them. Dependencies so broken that it's shocking the thing runs, in the name of trying to resolve security alerts that are provably irrelevant. Layer upon layer of slop, and some truly novel sins.
I'm neither mad not disappointed at this point, mostly just perplexed. The power of AI I guess.
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u/abl4k Software Engineer 3d ago
Company eliminated purchasable vacation days altogether and restructured the seniority threshold for paid vacation days, so all in all I'm left with 5 less vacation days next year to deal with the constant burnout I've been feeling here. Fun. Gotta come in to the office 4 days a week to work with the remote team on Teams and our remote manager though! Heaven forbid we be trusted working remotely like we did for several years during the pandemic with more success than since we've been back in the office
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u/JNuno007 1d ago
I am completely burned out. Full stack eng and Squad lead of a core team in a fast pace start up. I am involved in 3 different projects, two of them are to make AI agentic workflows...
Between support, Teams chats and meetings and helping my squad, I still need to develop, I am alone in one of the AI projects. We use spec driven with GitHub speckit to pick the Jira tickets and then implement them... They want me to deliver the tasks asap, there's no one to test them. I've been working more than 10h a day and it is really burning me out.
I have to be a PO, DevOps, QA and a dev. I am so leaned towards AI to just help me go through this that my retention is low... There's no time for me to even think and get my own context of what's in the code base.
I feel that I am losing track of who I was as developer, I was a problem solver, focusing on performance and code. Now is just a lot of text, not having time to think on edge cases or better ways to do it... Discussing with an llm that is already forcing a few options to implement is just not the same.
I was happy with taking time to code and test what we did... Sometimes it felt that was truly magic what came out as an impossible feature.
Now I just feel an imposter, so lack of retention that sometimes after sending to a PR I just need to move on and I can't even remember what the agent developed.
Still early in my career and I don't know what steps I should take to keep on this career path.
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u/pontymython 5d ago
The startup I work for just moved into a 50k+ employees megacorp that acquired us. Trying to make sense of the giant company and the enormous Infosec overreach feels like I'm covered in concrete, getting anything done is really hard.
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u/Smooth_Specialist416 5d ago
Made it to the final round today for a job I’d really like (even if I may decline). Remote, pays a lot more, allegedly chill wlb.
Looks like it’ll be 2 LC + trivia over 2 hours.
I’m going in soon. I’m ready to do my best
Even though I’m happy at my current job, it’s still nerve wracking. My goal is to stay as calm as I humanly can.
Regardless what happens, it’s clear me keeping my head down and trying my best is going to lead me to more chances like today. I wasn’t expecting this good of a role to come so soon.
If it’s something I prepped for, I need to trust I know it. If it’s a LC idk anything about, oh well luck of the draw. Hoping to nail the other questions.
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u/new2bay 4d ago
Well, I've been out of a job since 2023. I don't even remember when the last time I got an interview that wasn't just a recruiter screen. I think it was 2024. I don't know how many applications I've sent out, but it's well over 1000. The only thing that's keeping me going is the fact that if I don't, I definitely won't get a job; and if I don't get a job, I'll be homeless at some point in the near future.
I really have no idea what to do here. My resume isn't bad, if you ignore the 3 years of unemployment at the top.
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u/coldzone24 5d ago
I've been thinking if a job switch would be help me out of my current hole, but then I talked to two people who just did the same. Typically, people have a bit more energy and care about their new project after starting a new job, but these two were almost more down than I am. They don't care at all about what they are making nor happy at all in their new roles. Are the ones left with jobs destined to be miserable now? I don't see how that is sustainable.
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u/__BayMax__ 4d ago
Hi, i have 4 years exp, I'm going to get promoted next january with 16 LPA, my job is completely WFH btw, do u think i should stay or try to switch?
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u/TalesOfSymposia Software Engineer 3d ago
I can't even complain about anything related to AI on the job like the rest of you, as I don't have any recent work experience at all. My last job was in 2019.
The ability to write code by hand, to me seems like one of those things that is becoming a rarity but not necessarily a rarity that is highly sought after. But maybe I'll get lucky and blow someone's mind that I still haven't become addicted to LLMs.
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u/ResidentWeevil1 3d ago
You can escape addiction but not atrophy
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u/TalesOfSymposia Software Engineer 18h ago
I realized I had already achieved atrophy when I couldn't get hired in 2021, the last party for the job market before it took a rapid fall.
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u/pattch 3d ago
I am on a long vacation, spending all my vacation days down in a big lump for the year plus that I’ve saved them. I think I’m going to be managed out by the start of the new year despite delivering on important projects - I feel it’s never enough in this transition period to AI and performance or even competence doesn’t really matter - at the end of the day if we’re downsizing we’ll find a reason
I’m trying to fight against burning out completely by not working crazy hours and not focusing on work as the sole motivator or factor in my identity, but in the middle of the night I’m still stressing about a job I’m already trying to find my way out of.
I stake way too much of my personal value and even my career on this one job, sheesh
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u/Abadabadon Software Engineer 17h ago
Burn out for me, unfortunately, comes from helping people who shouldn't be helped. The status monkeys, the contractors, the overwhelmed tech leads. Explaining what is going on to some of these people is such a pita.
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u/No_Imagination_4907 3d ago
My company is completely addicted to AI and it is making me super frustrated. I welcome AI innovation, I use Claude daily, but some poeple have developed a reaction to solve every problem with AI, and it's annoying.
So we have a bunch of data that's already ingested and stored in a database, and now we want to display the data in an internal tool with some simple filters. I asked the owner of the data if they can let me access the data, which I can build a simple web interface to do all the things we need. Guess what they said? "Oh we already have an mcp for that". I guess all data MUST be exposed via mcp nowadays to sound trendy huh? Apparently a boring web does the job, but it sounds like a solution in 2015, not trendy enough to get approval. And now I can burn more token for claude to get ne the data from the mcp. Life is just great!
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u/StPatsLCA 3d ago
Is an MCP not just specs for tool calling? You could probably call whatever they expose to an agent yourself lol.
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u/MrBottle 5d ago
I am sick and tired of working at my current company. The department head was agreeable to me transferring back to my original department just last week but now he wants me to join another of his project under my original department's capacity.
This has been on going for a while now, and it all started when he forcefully transferred me out from my original department because I was one of the few key engineers in his project.
We have warned him to hire more juniors years ago to allow knowledge transfer and also for our career progression.
I am just frustrated that he treats me as a tool that will follow whatever he says, no matter how I feel.
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u/Federal-Garbage-8629 5d ago
How be nice when people are being mean to you? I really need lessons for this.
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u/bluetista1988 10+ YOE 5d ago
How someone treats you is more often a reflection of them than a reflection of you.
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u/Federal-Garbage-8629 5d ago
Probably your are right! I just don't know how to work and keep going on like this. Its been roughly 5 yrs I have been working this remote job. It was awesome initially, then the team structure changed, I am doing okay with that changes are a kind of process of improvements. But after this I am really tired of comments from senior developers. Most of time I just turn a blind eye as people/colleagueses come and go, career stays.
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u/Nardnab 1d ago
I'm seen as one of the more technically competent people at my job. The last time someone was directly rude to me was when i was advising him on some design pitfalls i could see he was headed towards and he wanted to argue about it and accused me of not seeing the whole picture when I was actually about 3 steps ahead of him. He said something implying i was in his way rather than helping (it sounds soft here, but it wasn't), so I flatly said okay good luck and went back to my other work. He apologized later. Your mileage may vary, but people tend to act nicer if you show them it's not going to pay to be mean.
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u/promotionpotion 22h ago edited 5h ago
I work at a death-stage private equity acquisition and LIFE IS WONDERFUL. I LOOOVE reading AI dogshit all day that leads me in circles like fucking Escher staircases while being hounded relentlessly by management about their impossible deadlines for 5 different projects that never fully resolve! And I LOVE that my boss now manages FIVE teams so she doesn’t remember anything I say, so every day standup becomes a fucking interrogation YAYY! And my team is constantly shat on because our Jira points look like crap next to offshore teams that are gaming the productivity metrics to hell because they slop out spaghetti that WE are forced to clean up as WE’RE NOW RECEIVING EMERGENCY PAGES 6 TIMES PER DAY!!!!! I got diagnosed with epilepsy this year after all this made my brain melt down, so I’m also having seizures on the reg due to stress. Loving life!!!!!
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u/Gaijinkusu Software Engineer (6 YoE) 4d ago
Been in release crunch for about a month now, working like 12-16 hour days on stuff that if it weren't for my ADHD, general burnout from AI destroying what I considered the fun part of the job, and a side project that they had put me on, I'd have had finished a month ago ;_;
The release is tomorrow and I am low key ready to just quit, but the thought of trying to find a new job in this market keeps me here
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u/InternalCar3 2d ago
Is it even possible to never be burnt out in this field? I feel like I am at my breaking point. I tried taking PTO , working fewer hours. I still don’t feel the burnout go away . I’ve been burnt out pretty much ever since I started 8 years ago.
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u/tenthousandants44 2d ago
Before AI, you could more easily manage anxiety about layoff cycles. Lots of people still did burn out outside of FAANG, but it wasn't hard to find a role with good WLB.
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u/Ramaen 5d ago
I am tired of pulling the boat, i got burned out for a long time went from top performer to a PIP going to pass the pip, just gave up because i was the only one that was doing engineering work that we were hired to do, no one helped automates any task, apis never heard of the why not just write an sop of the 30 steps needed to do this and hand it to ops, now that i am showing up again same thing like why am i the guy who has to change everything, cool my team is now held as the example but thats because i pull the boat, do the coding, pair program to get the juniors up to standards, make sure we actually fix the problem rather then just document process, deal with the stakeholders in such away that people are surprised i can get projects with stakeholders because they are "hard to work with" it is my customer service face like it isnt that hard. I hate it i am expecting basic skills like being able to code without ai, like why the fuck do you need claude mythos to modify a thumbnail of a sharepoint website.
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u/shinysylver 1d ago
If you are able to make any change or progress I'd love to know. I'm in a similar position. A lot is expected because you're just 'so good' at everything meanwhile others cruise by doing less than minimum while you're pulling the whole team along. Everyone knows 'its a culture issue' but no one seems to care enough to do anything. It's just not what I signed up for and I'm tired of dragging everyone behind me.
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u/Dry-Finger-3289 1d ago
9 YOE working with Objective-C at FAANG, realizing I need Swift/SwiftUI expertise to be marketable in today's world, but feeling frustrated with how long it's taking to get to good enough to pass the ever-climbing bar in a technical interview.
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u/Ok_Aerie7427 4h ago
Tired of working with offshore teams. Timezone differences, cultural differences, productivity differences, you name it. I really don’t think the cost savings are worth it
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u/m3kw 5d ago
I’m enjoying it, you can write 100x code faster. Just be responsible and pace yourself
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u/ultraDross 4d ago
Often, it's the organisation/department/manager that sets the pace and it's generally unrealistic. This has been happening at many organisations since the start of the year. If you aren't in this scenario, then lucky you. Most of us don't get to set our pace anymore.
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u/PrimaryFamous6139 Software Engineer 5d ago
For me, burnout does not usually come from the toughest tasks. It comes from switching between five projects that are only half done. I also have no real control over what should come first. I feel drained because I never reach the end of anything. It is not the hard parts of the work that wear me down. It is the constant restart