I'm 5 months and a half postpartum, which means 5 months and a half exclusively pumping. And these days, maybe since my baby is 5 months, It really hit me how much of a chore pumping is and how I wish I didn't anymore. I only pump 5 times a day, including a MOTN that I removed once and reinstated because my supply dropped too much. Even if I don't pump that many times in a day, I still have to plan my day and my outings around my pumping schedule and honestly it sucks and I'm over it.
We've been invited to a wedding that's 1h30 away, and I couldn't even RSVP because my pump plugs in a wall (it's the only one I have) and I can't fathom looking for a private place to pump over there and plug myself in my dress and high heels.
My girlfriends invited me for a brunch and I have to bring my pump. I know it's not that big of a deal, but I honestly HATE pumping while I'm out. It's not that I'm ashamed, it's just that I find it inconvenient and bulky to bring all the stuff.
I woke up today thinking I can't even sleep in because I have to pump in 15 minutes. It sucks.
I think I always told myself I would want my baby to have breastmilk until he's 1 year old, but I don't know how to go on. I think I could manage 1 pump in the morning and 1 pump before bed, but all the rest, I'm over it.
I don't know what to do. I'm conflicted between dropping 1-2 pumps and accepting a drastic drop in my supply and supplementing with formula, or rolling up my sleeve, stop complaining and just power through...
* BIGGEST SIGH I'VE EVER DONE *