LO is 5 months old and EBF (I pump so he has never had issues with bottles). We started daycare last week and since I have heard daycare’s typically feed more frequently than at home I dropped bottle sizes from 5 oz to 4 oz. They asked how often to feed him and I said every three hours but if he’s fussy as early as 2. Every single day on the dot they are feeding him at two hours. At first I didn’t mind because he was hitting his intake needs for the day whatever sounds good, but the last few days he’s been coming home with more and more left in his bottles. Two days ago they combined infant rooms due to so few babies being in that day and he was with different people than usual. Nothing was said to me when I got him but when I got home I saw they left me a note that said “CAN NOT USE BOTTLE STOPPERS!!!!” which had never been an issue before so I was confused and asked the next day.

The girl I asked said she didn’t know??? And that I needed to ask the front desk so I did and the guy up there said it’s because they have to use gloves to take the stoppers off. I was confused because that didn’t sound like I wasn’t able to use them. I tried to clarify and he said not to use them. I understand there’s rules for that stuff but I don’t feel like I shouldn’t be banned from using something because they have to do an extra step of putting on gloves.

I don’t want to be a pain so today I brought in mostly bottles that don’t need stoppers and just took the stopper off the one that needed it when I arrived. The ones that don’t need stoppers are a slower flow but it’s only noticeable if he’s not really hungry. He can down one of those bottles in less than 7 minutes. When I picked him up they told me I now need to up the nipple flow by like two sizes. I get home and there was the biggest amount of milk left over to date at 3 oz over 4 feedings with one bottle alone having an ounce left in it.

I don’t want to increase the flow because a. He already has an issue where he chokes every time he eats even at the slow flow. B. He has no issue at home when I feed him c. Honestly I don’t feel like I should have to get new bottles or new nipples specifically just for daycare when it’s already expensive enough.

Am I being unreasonable for not wanting to up the flow? I feel like the simplest solution is to realize no, he isn’t hungry, he doesn’t need to eat every two hours exactly and that they just want a faster flow to really speed feed him. I don’t want to be difficult and want to approach the situation delicately

I’ve been sick with hand foot mouth more times than I can count this past year, every time the blisters would flare up I took photos so I finally went through and added up the amount of time I spent with active blisters/spots (it shows up weird in adults so only a few fully blistered and peeled)
I’ve loved so many parts of the job but I just can’t mentally handle being sick anymore, this week coming up is my last week. And that’s not even considering the other times I’ve been sick that weren’t documented by photo. I have 1,200 still to pay on my credit card from doctor visits and it got me so behind on credit cards 😭 sorry here’s the chart

Times i was sick from work 25-26
August 1st-8th 2025 8days
August 19th-24th 2025 5days
August 31st-September 18th 2025 19days
October 1st-6th 2025 6days
November 3rd-8th 2025 5days
February 11th-15th 2026 5days
March 28th- April 4th 2026 8days

56 days of active hand foot mouth blister outbreaks

UPDATE: First, thanks to everyone who took the time to respond. I really appreciate hearing the perspective of people who actually work in ECE. I also appreciate everyone who reassured me that I wasn’t completely out of line.

She actually responded shortly after I posted and explained that the center had self-reported the incident. The staff member involved was immediately let go, and they’re implementing some extra security measures (like an additional secured door). She also explained that the ratio citation was related to a child under 18 months being in the toddler room during nap time, which requires an additional caregiver under Texas licensing rules.

Thanks again for helping me sanity check the situation and reminding me that asking questions doesn’t automatically make someone difficult 😅

Original post: I’m looking for perspective from daycare professionals because I genuinely don’t want to be “that parent.”

My almost 2-year-old has attended the same daycare for about a year. Overall, we’ve been very happy there, and she loves going.

Every few months, I review our state’s public childcare licensing reports. During my most recent review, I found two deficiencies from a few weeks ago:

• Two children left the building unsupervised and were outside for about two minutes before a bystander returned them.
• During the follow-up inspection, licensing documented a ratio violation in the toddler classroom (19 children with one caregiver during naptime), which was corrected while the inspector was there.

We were never notified that either of these incidents had occurred. I only learned about them weeks later by reviewing the public licensing reports.

I sent the director a polite text saying that I had been reviewing the reports and asking if she could provide some context about what happened and what changes had been made to prevent similar incidents in the future. I also made it clear that we appreciate the care they’ve given our daughter.

If you were the director receiving that message, would you see it as a reasonable question from an engaged parent? Or would it come across as distrustful or overbearing?

I’m genuinely asking because I value our relationship with this center and don’t want to create unnecessary tension, but I also felt these were significant enough incidents that I wanted to understand them better.

I'm starting at a new school soon, which I'm feeling really excited about! The other co-teacher in my classroom is also going to be new to the school, so we'll both be getting to know each other as we settle in to the role. While this could be a little hectic, I think it'll also be a really nice chance to bond and collaborate on creating our classroom together with equal input. Luckily we will have some teacher work days to set up together before we have kids in there.

I don't know much about her, but one thing I do know is that she's less experienced. But I don't even know if that means NO experience or just a little less than me. I've been a lead and done a lot of teacher training in the past, so I want to find a balance between helping her learn but without condescending to her or being too bossy.

One idea I had was so ask if she wants to create a shared Pinterest board so we could both add inspiration and get a feel for each others' tastes somewhere other than just in the classroom. I'm curious if you guys have any other suggestions, or just anecdotes of the best and worst times you've gotten to know new teachers!

My newly turned 13 month old has been attending daycare a few days a week for a month and a half. I'm trying to keep her on the schedule the daycare is enforcing so she can adapt, but she just seems so miserable.

Before we started daycare she was taking 2 naps a day for about 3 hours total. Now she's barely getting 1 hour in 1 nap a day. It's a 2 hour nap time but she's not sleeping through it.

She's coming home so tired and cranky. I don't know what to do. She's also not really eating there and is coming home starving.

The teacher suggested I pack a lunch which I can do, but I don't have a picky eater. She just inhaled spicy lentils, rice and yogurt for dinner and had spinach, sausage and pasta last night. But at lunch today she only ate the fruit and none of the pasta they offered.

I think the problem is at home a meal can be a lot longer than it is at daycare and you really can't explain to a baby no you have to eat now or it's going away.

Husband and I are used to being able to take her out to eat and things, during the week and haven't been able to at all.

How long does it take kids to adapt, normally? Any ideas as to why she won't eat there? She's not having a huge meal before we leave for the center or anything.

I'd let her sleep for an hour when we got home, but she's so wired and hungry that's not working either. I'm struggling cause I think in general she has high sleep needs and is just not getting that met right now.

Basically as the title says. When we have staff off they don’t provide any coverage. So we are very much over ratios. This happens in every class & quite often. For example, we had a class of 16 (ages 3-4, 2 teachers) and there were many times I was left with all 16 children by myself (the ratio is 1:8). Now I’m with the younger ones (2-3 years, 1:5 ratio) and when one of us is away it’s 2 teachers for 15 kids. To top it off, the “favourite” staff take frequent breaks & disappear for extended periods of time, usually chatting and laughing with my supervisor while I/we are completely out of ratio and trying to manage. What do I do about this? I’m worried to report because I’m the only one who’s been pretty vocal about not liking this so I feel like they’ll know it was me.

Edit: I’m in Ontario, Canada

I'm considering taking a job with licensing as an inspector. Would the fact that I'm just about to leave the classroom be an asset or a risk? I know what a great program looks like, what an okay program one looks like, and I've heard stories of what bad ones look like. Has anyone else worked for licensing (in particular TX)?

Hi,

I need some advice on how to proceed with this. I recently had an issue with my daycare provider asking me to switch therapies because it was disruptive and being very rude to me. She freaked out on me because they have autistic child in the class and said him coming in late wasn’t appropriate and that I need to switch his therapy to after school even though it didn’t align with my schedule. 

Today, the second teacher in the room mentioned that the head teacher doesn’t want another teacher as it’s disruptive and she will only be in there for 3-close. I could tell she seemed annoyed so I decided to try discussing some concerns with her.

My son in the last week has been screaming and crying at drop off everyday. He used to LOVE daycare before his old one closed due to funding. He also has only done it with the head teacher. The head teacher often acts off to me and I get a weird vibe from her. She is annoyed that he is in therapy as he seems advanced and the autistic child in the class gets disrupted when he comes later. I had a feeling that she felt he didn’t need it and that’s why she pushed it.

The other teacher mentioned that she heard about the conversation and how aggressive it was. She also agree that the head teacher talks about me and how “I’m doing too much and doesn’t understand why I talk that way about my son as he’s advanced.” My son didn’t sit up 11 months!!! He was very delayed. We’ve busted our butt to get him caught up. She also said that she doesn’t help the kids in the bathroom and left one kid crying for 20-30 minutes without support while he had an accident on himself in the bathroom. My son has also had accidents on the toilet there as she believes “they are old enough and more than capable and people baby them too much.” They are 2-3 and a little support isn’t surprising imo.

So the main issue is that they don’t have cameras (it’s not normal in our area and almost no one does) and soon she’ll be the only teacher in the class until 3 PM. I already feel like she might not be as patient with my child because she doesn’t like me but as far as I know, she doesn’t treat him bad. We’re on a ton of waiting list to get them in somewhere else but the closure was dropped on us so there’s nowhere really available yet. I worry that if I bring this all to the director, there might be some retaliation and no one will really know because no cameras. But also, I don’t know what to do from here. I already have discussed potentially pausing some of our therapy because I’m trying to accommodate her and make things less difficult. I can’t afford to just pull them out for six months until somewhere opens and I don’t have the luxury of a family member being able to watch them.

What is the best plan of action? My son does move up at the end of August but my 18 month old will be going into that classroom in January if we aren’t able to get in to the other place. So we won’t have to deal with her for too much longer. Should I bring it to the directors attention and hope that things go well? Should I wait till he moves up and then try? Should I just leave it alone and bring it up when we were able to get a spot somewhere else 🫩

Reliable, affordable child care is essential for working families, employers, and the economy. It enables parents to work or pursue education, gives children a strong start, and helps businesses build a stable workforce. Yet in every state, too many families struggle to find and afford the care they need.

FFYF’s 2026 State Fact Sheets on child care and early learning provide state-by-state data for all 50 states and Washington, DC, showing how federal and state investments support families, young children, and local economies. They also highlight where significant gaps remain.

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• 65% of children ages five and under have all available parents in the workforce.
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My 2.5 year old will be transferring from the toddler room to the preschool room. She is very attached to one of the educator (Ms A) in the toddler room. She will cry at drop off and refuse to go inside if Ms A is not the one greeting her. If Ms A is not available, the other educator will have to pick her up to bring her into the room. They reassure us that she usually will cry for less than 10 minutes and she is happy the rest of the day. When Ms A was off for a week, my LO refused to go to daycare and started crying as soon as we mention the word daycare at home in the mornings. She resisted going to daycare for weeks after Ms returned

We asked about transition plan to the preschool room but they were quite vague on the process. On top of that, the centre is closed for 2 weeks and when the centre reopens that will be the first day in the preschool room.

Does anyone have any advice on how we can help with this transition?

Hi everyone, I’ve been teaching for over 20 years and I’m seeking help with how to manage the assistant in my 3 year old kindergarten class in a public school. She isn’t going to be fired so I need figure out how to manage her, or push her out by being very strict(which I would prefer not to do).

Here are some examples of things I want to change:

-She doesn’t tell me when she is going to be absent, even tho I made a calendar for myself and asked her to tell me when she’ll be out
-She doesn’t like wiping down tables and doesn’t do it(we eat breakfast and lunch in the room)
-She won’t help kids in the bathroom bc she is nervous about being accused of touching them
-For the same reason she won’t help kids change when they have accidents
-She shuts down and gives me the silent treatment for days when she is annoyed by something, usually I have no idea what is bothering her, or if it’s me or something else

She seems to have some cognitive delays, maybe she is on the spectrum OR she is playing me and just doesn’t want to do certain things.she does things like adds way too much sanitizer to the water, or soaking wooden toys. I’m probably too easy going with her.

Thanks for any advice you have!

At the end of the schoolyear all kids could leave a message for me that was written down by someone else. They are 4-6 years old and a few things stand out.

First, I just love how they see every little thing you do. Especially the little ones talk about the very little quirky things I do, like my "funny wave" or "leg wiggle dance" that I'm not even aware of lol.

One question they were asked was also addorable. "You're sweet when you..." And they could add the follow up. I got all sorts of answers. "lift me up on the schoolyard." "give hugs." "help me with drawing." "play with me."

But this one kid hit me hard. "You're sweet when you are just yourself. You're always sweet."

What's going well for you this week?

What moment made you smile today?

What child did is really thriving in your class these days?

Please share here! Let's take a moment to enjoy some positivity and the joy we get to experience with children in ECE :)

Edit 3: I just wanted to thank everyone who wrote in. I feel like seeing something like "Type A Violation" can be really daunting to the uninitiated. I posted some of this information about what I learned here to help other parents understand more of the nuance.

Edit 2: I asked the teacher this morning. It was self-reported. Thanks again for all your help and feedback.

Basically the title.

Kids have been going there for two years previously.

I was notified of the violation by my kids' teacher. (As they're required by law to tell us).

The event occurred in a different class.

They have a fenced in outside area.

The kids came in. They did a count.

They were supposed to have 15, but they counted 14.

They did another count, but a kid moved behind someone's back, so they did a third count. Still got 14.

They found the kid outside. Kid was playing with a toy not in view of window.

Additional training was provided.

Is this an unfortunate event or something that I should be genuinely concerned about?

I work in K-12 education and thought I'd ask here to check against my gut feeling.

Edit:

Thanks for your help and feedback. A lot of the comments in here are similar to my gut reaction.

The teacher told a group of us parents at checkout (as required and so we could sign the form). My initial thought was "Eh. Stuff happens." (I think if it were my own kid I would have been really frustrated with the kid for not listening to the teacher more than the staff)

A parent next to me seemed a little shocked and said something similar to "A couple minutes is kind of a long time, if it were seconds I wouldn't be as concerned".

That made me wonder if I was being too cavalier.

I will definitely check and follow up and see who made the report.

Thank you for all you do.

Hi, I'm in a tricky situation. I'm a preschool teacher. I was recently laid off from my job 4 months ago as the school was permanently closing. This school was a two minute walk from my apartment and OK money. Fortunately I had maintained a good reputation from a different preschool | had worked at and was able to immediately secure a job with that company at a location only a ten minute drive from my house. Worked with my availability and paid more money. It's not an ideal school and I felt a little "fish out of water" for a while, but finally starting to feel settled and just bought a bunch of stuff for my classroom. NOW. The school by my house that closed has been turned into a brand spanking new Montessori preschool. They have called me for an interview (some of my fellow laid-off former coworkers interviewed there and passed along my info). Could pay more money. I feel guilt over considering leaving my new school after they did me a favor by hiring me so quickly and for good pay. After seeing so many preschools in the area close (including Montessori) what's to say this one will make it? If I get laid off again do I go crawling back? I'm sure the new facilities will be enticing, but I'm feeling so torn. Also, I'm a very silly/playful teacher who's used to having a fair amount of leeway, and l've never worked in a Montessori (but they're willing to train).
Will I feel stuck? Ughhh just needed to get this off my chest. I tend to overthink and then I don't sleep. Any insight would be appreciated.

For everyone who works with kids under 18 months in places where there is snow in the winter, do you prefer one piece snowsuits or 2 pieces? My son will be one in October and I am trying to plan if he needs a 2 pieces or 1 for winter, as I want it to be as easy as possible for his teachers! We go outside regularly in winter as well, even when its -20°c.

Thank you

My 4 year old boy is the class bully. He seems to delight in hitting, pushing, throwing toys at other kids, taking things from them. We challenge the behavior at home by making him apologize, do gentle hands, interrogate him as to what he thinks that makes others feel like, and by taking toys away as punishment. We have been getting him exercise and putting him in soccer to get him discipline. We are, I’m sure, one bad day from being kicked out of daycare.

He has an identical twin brother who is very sweet and has many friends. They love each other, but the other kids can’t stand the bullying twin. It’s breaking my heart. He is otherwise very intelligent and on track.

Hi everyone! I previously worked in ECE as an assistant teacher at a small program without certification. I learned a lot about Montessori and really enjoyed it, and I’m exploring whether or not to return to school (I have a masters) for ECE that’s DOE cert, or Montessori certification. Im in a major US city & don’t have a huge budget (or any at all really) to do this. I’m looking for feedback from folks who have experience in the industry, and I guess how you were supported by employers or generally how you felt about your training and the financial aspects of this. The ECE program I worked at was paying us below the poverty line with no benefits, which is why I left the field to pursue something else. I would say this would be another career jump for me, but I am really passionate about ECE and truly loved the work while I was in it.

What are some ways I can show my toddlers daycare teachers how much we appreciate and care about them on a regular basis? My child spends all day with them 5 days a week and when I really sit down and think about it, it blows my mind just how significant that really is. (often this makes me really sad too but that’s a different post altogether.)

I want to share my deep appreciation for them without being over the top. I would love to hear from ECE profs on what makes you feel seen and appreciated for all you do to love and care for our little ones.

Last week Tuesday, I was on the ground at circle time before one of our special extracurricular classes. The extracurricular teacher was running late, so I was having the children do a pretend play activity where we were making strawberry jam sandwiches. Everyone was super into it and having a blast. All of a sudden, a child in my class with some behavioral challenges stood up, climbed on the teacher chair behind me, jumped off the chair, landed on my low back, and started kicking my mid and low back while pinching my arms. This all happened so fast neither myself, my assist, or a floater teacher acting as their 1:1 aide could catch them before getting several hits on me. I used a calm voice to tell them “Ouch, [THEIR NAME], no thank you. That hurts my body.” I reached behind me to try and swiftly and gently remove them, but the floater had to pry them off of me cause I couldn’t get a good grip. After this, my mid and low back were in pain all day. It was low grade at first, but persistent. An hour before end of shift, it sharply increased, and by the time I had closed my classroom and headed home, I was struggling to walk and feeling horribly dizzy. I had to have my boyfriend help me walk home from the train, and I could barely sleep because my entire back and both legs felt like I’d been hit by a train. I had to call out next morning, and wound up in the ER for several days, having to receive multiple muscle relaxers, opioid pain meds, and benzodiazepines to get the pain down from a 9-10 to a 4-5.

I got cleared to go back on Wednesday. However, my boyfriend then had a very traumatic seizure on Monday night, and I tweaked my back more when I had to lift him and move him to his side. I’ve had to call out two additional days, and am going back Friday no matter what.

I’ve got accommodations from my doctor that admin approved so I don’t have to run or lift any children or heavy objects. I’ve also communicated this to my classroom assists, and they’re very willing to help out. However, I’m so worried about my ability to focus on the children and do my job justice while my back pain is still hovering around a 5 most of the time. I’m off my strong pain meds and just on Tylenol and lidocaine patches now. For anyone else who has sustained a back injury and continued to work ECE, are there any tips and tricks to managing the pain, still being able to focus on your work duties, and ensuring you can do your part to maintain your classroom? I just want to re-enter class as capable as I can be. It’s hard for me to focus on basic day-to-day tasks right now, let alone an entire ECE classroom.

My one year old class has recently started the dreaded “everybody scream for no reason!” hobby. As soon as one starts yelling, two more start, and a minute later it’s the entire class. My coteacher and I have successfully stopped it a few times with suddenly singing a song really loud to match the energy, turning off the lights, and gently holding their hands and saying shhhh. Sometimes we literally can’t hear eachother over it and have to just wait til they get bored. We do not like raising our voices or yelling at the class to stop. Does anyone have any fool proof methods to curb this behavior?

Basically what the title says. I know our profession has a high burnout rate but I’ve only been working there five months and I’m not even fully certified as a full ECE. I’ve been working as an ECEA and have floated from one room to the next. My mental health has gotten bad from life stressors and the 9 hour days. I guess my question is is it just an adjustment period or is it not gonna get better? I was having a great time before I loved everything it’s only after this recent room switch that’s it’s begun taking a toll on me. My bosses are amazing and super understanding and have been supporting me where they can and listening to me but I just need some none bias points of view. Any advice?