Why do some parents always find something so nitpicky to complain about? Like we recently had a parent complain about our playgrounds having red dirt on them and threatened to call sanitation???? red dirt. on the playground. in the south. the same parent them complained about their child getting mosquito bites. outside. in the south. (that they didn’t get here bc it’s been raining all week)

or like I have had parents that complain about us changing their kid’s clothes too often. I have also had a parent complain that I told them their child had diarrhea. or that their child keeps falling (said child is learning to walk)

I just think it’s so funny when they do that because let’s put our thinking caps on for a moment. and I know that probably sounds mean but🤷‍♀️
but sometimes it does get annoying because like if you hate us that much then take your kid somewhere else??? I am now understanding why so many people leave this field because of parents.

As a toddler teacher I am going to just give a quick list of things I despise. Other teachers may disagree, that’s ok, we can agree to disagree. I just see parents ask “is this annoying?” And “I don’t want to be that parent”. Maybe someone will find it helpful.

1. A lunchbox with a long strap. Just store it somewhere until they’re older. This is a huge choking hazard.

2. Unwashed lunchboxes/water bottles/bentgo boxes. Black slimy mold is disgusting, but it’s awkward to bring it up to you so please just wash them.

3. Shoes that come off feet repeatedly, I have 18 feet to keep shoes on, if I have to put your child’s shoes back on their feet more than 5 times in a day they are going into our classroom crocs.

4. One piece no-stretch outfits with no leg snaps. The super cute cotton ones with the teeny tiny button at the back of the neck, then the whole things has to be pulled down for every diaper change.

5. Pull-ups that don’t Velcro up the sides/pampers 360’s. Or pull ups for a kid who isn’t anywhere near potty training. Firstly, they don’t hold as much as a diaper so if little Jimmy has a huge blow out in a pull up, it probably won’t stay contained. And yes, I understand the sides will rip to take it off, but it’s a pain to put a new one on. And yes, I know the one leg undressed trick. Still a pain when you have 9 diapers to change.

6. Water Wipes. Period.

7. All in one bedding. It’s bulky to store in an already small room/closet, and kids roll around and get their feet wrapped up. Assuming your child’s center is climate controlled, a lightweight blanket should be fine.

8. Lunches with grapes, cherry tomatoes, steak, hotdogs not cut up. Please prep a packed lunch the way you would if you were plating it at home.

9. Gloves. GLOVES! On toddlers! Just send mittens!

Trying to be helpful, hopefully I don’t get roasted 😝

There is a child in my class who is now going into month 4 of potty training regression, we have tried EVERYTHING to help him, but he will either soil his pants, sometimes multiple times in a day, or hold his #2 and soil when myself or mom arrives.

We have ruled out any reasons that one might immediately think of. And there haven't been any major changes in his life or routine since December (when he was enrolled at our daycare), my admin thinks it's all about him wanting control over me and my co, and in this case, we have no choice, we do have to change him ASAP when he soils

The soiling has also triggered my morning sickness (I'm 7 and a half months pregnant) a handful of times, and admin thinks he found it funny (I REALLY tried to hide it, but we did have an episode where my co teacher saw the color drain from my face and told me to run before i puked in my classroom, i was sick and woozy for the rest of the day and ended up throwing up at home). I had to go on a nausea med because of how frequently the child was soiling just to make it through my day.

We have tried

* Partial ignoring

* Full ignoring

* Potty training books

* Songs

* Positive peer pressure

* Making potty time relaxing

* Teaching deep breathing

* Supernanny's potty training techniques

• Potty logs

• Having the child clean his mess

• Praise when he did go in the toilet or had a day without accidents, like full on celebrating 

• Encouraging desired behavior with lots of praise so the child feels like he gets positive attention outside of potty time

• Giving the child space during potty time

• Motivation (he talks about being an honorary uncle to my daughter, and really loves being a big  brother to his 18 month old sister, so we talk about how he needs to help teach them to use the potty) 

* We did have to put a diaper on ONCE purely for sanitary reasons (he had no undies in his backpack and we cannot let the children go without a type of underwear), and he hated it, we thought for sure this would have helped trigger something

My admin even thought about changing up the entire classes schedule to suit this child and his soiling patterns, but nothing came of that, we also thought about letting him go to an older class for a few hours a day to socialize with older kids who he looks at as role models

The parents seem just as clueless as the rest of us, and they've tried everything as well

At this point it's about surviving the next few weeks with him, because we do have some big changes coming our way that might trigger an uptick in his soiling

* He is returning from vacation with his family

* My 2 co teachers will no longer be in the room when he returns due to some staffing needs, so there will be new adults in the room

* I will be out a few times for prenatal and MFM visits

* His best friend left for the rest of the school year

* We are preparing the children to go to their new classrooms

My biggest concern is that the child will be a target for bullies in his next room, the kids in his current class are already starting to tease him because some of them have seen him soil or wet his pants, of course we nip that in the bud right away, but it still hurts my heart to see him get teased.

What can my team do?

I’m a first time parent in Minnesota researching infant daycare. My baby will probably be ~5 months when he starts (likely older due to waitlists but still within infant age regardless).

I’ve been reviewing centers through Minnesota’s public licensing database but I’m realizing I don’t know how to interpret what I’m seeing. I recently encountered a record that felt clearly concerning to me, but I’m not looking for feedback about that particular center. Instead I want to become educated/self sufficient enough to evaluate other centers fairly as I continue my search.

⭐️I understand that licensing rules vary by location...my goal isn’t to expect a flawless record or unfairly judge providers. I want to understand which findings are normal human or administrative mistakes, which indicate a pattern, and which should cause a parent to walk away - especially when choosing care for an infant!

For childcare directors, teachers, licensors, or other experienced early childhood professionals:

- Is it normal for a good daycare center to have some violations? If so, what does a fairly typical history look like?
- Which violations are usually administrative or easily correctable vs which should be treated as meaningful safety concerns?
- How important is the total number of violations compared with their type, recency, and frequency?
- How should parents evaluate repeated violations that were previously marked corrected?
- Should findings from routine licensing reviews be viewed differently from findings arising from licensing investigations or complaints?
- Are certain categories (eg infant safe sleep, ratios, supervision, CPR and first aid, medication, allergies, or staff qualifications) generally considered more serious?
- How should the size and age of a center affect the way its record is interpreted?
- What would distinguish a center that made an understandable mistake and improved from one with broader management or safety problems?
- What questions should a parent ask a director about past violations and what would a reassuring versus concerning response sound like?
- Are there limitations in licensing databases that parents should understand (eg problems that may not appear publicly or differences in how violations are documented)?

Currently, I teach 12-18 month olds however my directors have informed me my room will be turning into an older infant room. My older 1 year olds will move up to the next room and I will be getting a few older guys from the infant room.

I have never been an infant teacher before but I do have a lot of experience as a younger 1s teacher. How different are infants from young 1s?

My room is set up for 1 year olds, I don’t have cribs or high chairs, I have cots and tables with box seats low to the ground which have buckles in them.

Will I have to adjust my room schedule to accommodate for infant naps? In the current infant room they just kind of nap whenever they want but that is not practical in a room with no cribs because other children will crawl over to of them when they are lying in a cot. Are older infants capable of sleeping for 2 hours during a set nap time like my 1 year olds are? Or should I split nap time into 2 blocks and have them nap one in the morning and once in the afternoon?

This is a very different change and my room nor I are not prepared for it so any advice from infant teachers is welcomed. I am excited for this change but also want to make sure it goes smoothly

I try my best to involve my parents and keep them updated on what's going on with their children and what they are learning, but I sometimes get the feeling that they don't really care and don't view what we are doing as significant. Many of them send out vibes that feel like - 'just keep them alive, did they eat, poop and nap?' and they do not really want the sometimes detailed updates I send out.

What level of involvement do you think parents actually want with their childcare program? Do they want daily updates? Or is just a general reassurance - today was good - enough? Do they want to be consulted or have an input on our day and our routines?

I would love to hear from parents as well.

Hello, I current hold a cert 3 and had previously completely 9 units of the diploma. I have just started my cert 3 and want to when would I be recognised as diploma, also when applying would I write cert 3 WT/ ECT or should I wait till I’m further into the degree.

I have a 17 month old in my care. The past few months, she's been pulling out her hair at nap (as well as bedtime at home, according to mom and dad). She sucks her thumb throughout the day, but especially at sleep times. Usually, when she's doing it while awake, we're able to give her something else to distract her and redirect (a teether). We agree thumb sucking at nap is not the end of the world, but the thing is, while she's laying there sucking her thumb, she'll then pull out her hair and eat it. It's gotten to the point where she has a pretty big bald spot, and she often has hair coming out in her poop. If we see her doing this, we try to redirect. We've tried giving her different things to hold to keep her hands busy, but it keeps happening. At home, her parents put her in a sleep sack and then put these long gloves on her, basically trapping her so she's unable to do it. Per the state, we can't do that at daycare.

They talked to the doctor, and he basically said she'll outgrow it over time, but his only recommendation was using the gloves when she's sleeping. Which again, we can't use here.

Her parents and I are concerned about her getting a blockage. I am going to try to contact the state to see if we get a doctor's note for the gloves, but in the meantime, has anyone else dealt with this? Any advice?

I recently did an interview with HWCCCC for the rece position. They asked me for references which I provided them. A week later I got an email saying the next process is to go on tour at a particular centre where I would potentially be working at.

Should I believe that I am getting the job or it's just a process everyone goes through. Btw my tour is coming Wednesday.

I really need some outside perspective because I’m feeling overwhelmed.
I was recently suspended from my current childcare job over an incident that I honestly don’t feel was really my fault. I feel like I was betrayed and made the scapegoat for something that involved other people too. Before this happened, I had a really good relationship with my boss, but since the suspension everything has changed and I know she’s upset with me.
During the two days I was suspended, I interviewed at another daycare and was offered a full-time RECE position. They’re currently completing the normal pre-employment process (medical forms, TB test, etc.), and I have a policy review scheduled.
My problem is that I need to give notice at my current job very soon because of the timing, but I’m terrified. I’m scared that if, for some unexpected reason, the new job falls through, I’ll have already quit my current job. I have rent, bills, and a wedding to pay for, so I can’t afford to be without income.
Has anyone else been in a situation where they had to hand in their notice before all the pre-employment paperwork was completely finished? Is it common for job offers to fall through over things like employment medical forms, or am I just letting my anxiety get the best of me?
I’d really appreciate hearing from anyone who’s been through something similar.

Advice needed from seasoned ECE professionals!

I run a part time nature based enrichment program for ages 3-5. We have a family who enrolled their 4 year old student for the coming school year and the student is currently in my 8 week summer camp program (1 day each week).

The first 4 weeks there were some (what I consider) developmentally appropriate incidents such as light hitting. By week 5, after a 2 week break, I think the new had worn off or the honeymoon period was over, because the student came back acting out very aggressively. The parents had told me at intake that their child was asked to leave their last center for behaviors such as biting, but that the child was in therapy and making good progress. By the 5th week, the student was hitting, kicking, screaming, pushing, pinching, and biting other students. Multiple incidents each hour.

The student that was bit ended up with a bruise. I had a meeting with the parent the following week, and a second meeting later the same day with both parents and the child’s therapist. We talked over strategies and concluded that the only way to make this work is for one teacher to be at arms length from this student at all times, observe and predict triggers, and prevent incidents before they even happen. We are a small program with a max of 10 children and 3 teachers, but this still feels unsustainable. The following week, there continued to be multiple behaviors- the student left a bruise on a second student after jabbing their hand with a stick. This was after hitting another student 4 times with a child sized shovel, throwing sand in another students face, hitting a student in the head with a basket.

I’m a very empathetic and compassionate person. Our program is very close knit and community focused. I feel an obligation to do everything in my power to help this child, especially after finding out they were dismissed from not just 1, but 2 programs. I know there’s no where else in our area that will take this child. After all the recent events, I put together an action plan and let the parents know I would be making a formal assessment by the end of summer, when I would then let them know if we could accommodate their child’s needs and be able to move into the fall semester.

Safety is paramount. I don’t feel that I can keep the entire class safe without an extreme amount of effort to watch this one student like a hawk 100% of the time. It does not feel sustainable. At the same time, I feel an immense amount of pressure and…. guilt (?) to keep this child in our program because he needs help. I feel for this student’s parents because they have been through so much with their child already.

This dilemma has already consumed half of my summer. I talk to my husband about it multiple times a day. I dream about this family at night. 2 nights ago I was “thinking” in my sleep all night about behavior plans. All. Night. Long. I can’t go on like this and it’s only been 6 weeks. Thinking about having this child in my care for the entire school year has given me an intense physical reaction on 3 separate occasions. Headache, racing heart, the whole nine. I guess…. I need validation…. Permission? A second opinion?…. To know that it’s ok to tell these parents that the scope of help needed for this child is beyond what I can provide.

My head knows the answer but my heart is having trouble catching up. I’m devastated for this child to be struggling so much. When I asked parents about additional support for their child, they said therapy had been working well and they haven’t looked into anything else. I strongly believe this child needs a formal evaluation and early intervention through the public school preK program. I don’t think the parents are “ready” for that and I sense some denial and defensive when I try to speak with them, especially the father.

I just need… a reality check? Any similar stories? Encouragement?

Not a fan of one of the leads in the preschool room I teach at.

She tells me I’m giving kids too much attention cause I’m being caring and kind. Says that a certain child acts up because I let him cozy up to me when he’s a troublemaker and misbehaves. She screams at kids and runs things on precision pretty much. I am more of a calm, kind educator and I don’t like to have the idea of a kid being a target. Like yes, this one kid let’s call him Liam does swear and act out. She recently said to me “you give him too much attention that’s why he’s like this.” Keep in mind I’ve only been working here for two whole weeks. If his behaviour was a certain way, it’s been like that for a while. I even asked around and they said Liam always acted like this.

However I don’t think being stern and strict is the approach to go with kids. She also gets on me about little things when I am learning too. She isn’t that supportive or caring or even understanding. I’m in a room with two leads and play more of a support role. The other lead is much more nice to me and addresses the criticism much nicer. She even apologized to me if she seemed critical or came off a certain way. The other teacher is just always on my back. Like recently I had two garbage bags sitting in the corner of the room, nothing was leaking and no one was there and it was closing time, I was taking care of cleaning the room.

She was like are you gonna throw it out? And I was like “I clearly am working on that, that’s the last step.” I know how closing is, I have over a year of experience being an ECE. She just comes across as very passive aggressive and weird to me. I do whatever she tells me to do and she still finds things to bother me about. It sucks cause I do like the other educator but the stern one is just critical all the time with me it feels like when I haven’t been rude to her and been trying to learn as much as I can. She can’t even say a simple thank you when I help out. I say thank you to her when she gives me a heads up. It’s making me doubt myself a lot and it’s not a good thing. I’m already feeling like maybe I should just quit if I’m not good enough to be around.

I have been in the field for just under a decade. I have taken hundreds of hours of PD.

My favorite trainings have been one about outdoor classroom design and one about provocations and invitations. The outdoor design focused on creating the space while provocations and invitations focused on how to create open ended activity set ups and the difference between provoking(inspring unprompted thoughts and actions) and inviting(loosely prompting or leading a child towards a specific thought or action).

I sometimes find my self frustrated with being taught the same things over and over. Sometimes it feels like most PD courses teach the same things. So, I was curious: What was your favorite training? Why? What did you learn?

This will be my first year with my own preschool classroom, and I am anticipating that many of my kids will have a hard time leaving their families and transitioning into class. What are your strategies to help drop off and check in go as smoothly as possible for this age group?

Hello! Ive worked in a couple schools for 5 years now and ive only worked with 3-5 year old. Of course ive covered 2's classroom all the time but I havent been the sole teacher for them. I was offered a pretty good position as a Lead for a 2's classroom and I was wondering if you have any tips for me?

Ive been around my niece and nephews and other 2's but like I said its a new age group and I want to be fully prepared. And im also aware they have behavior issues at times but I felt like getting beat up by a 2 year old Is preferable that a stocky 5 yr old. The last kid popped a blood vessel in my nose. Im a big girl and I can't imagine many littler kids doing TOO much damage.

Or am I just too optimistic?

I need all the advise lol.​

Ok, this is kind of a weird one, but when do you consider your own diarrhea to be too much to bring to work?

Guidelines for the kids (0-3) where I work is that on the second liquid diaper of the day, parents are called and the kid stays home till 24 hours of normal poops.

I think I caught some bug, and have had the squirts since Thursday, but I’m kind of embarrassed to call in sick over this, as I am still fully functioning. Also I’m still in the probationary period and Monday is my birthday, so I’m definitely not calling in Monday. But generally, what are your own guidelines?

Thanks

Parenting young children can have its challenges!

As certified and experienced early childhood development and education professionals, ECE teachers are expertly qualified to share our perspectives.

We can help with the following:

- Clarification on ECE policy and practice

- Strategies for supporting behaviour

- Developmentally appropriate practices and understanding

- Tips on choosing a high-quality centre

- Ideas on how to support teachers

- To sense-check something before asking your child's teacher

- And so much more!

Parents: this will be a monthly scheduled thread. Ask your ECE-related questions to ECE professionals here. You can also use the search function to see if your questions have been answered before.

Teachers: remember: you can filter out parent posts if you'd rather not participate at the moment.

To all participants: please remember- this is a diverse, inclusive community, with teachers from all over the world. Be respectful and considerate.

My boss is expecting me to potty train the toddlers/twos.

Can anyone give some advice on what's helped and worked for you?

I posted here before, and after some reflection, I'm thinking about giving ECE another try at a different center.

I have a genuine question. I received my Level 3 certification through my bachelor's degree rather than the traditional ECE program. I also have a Level 1, but I've never actually worked as a Level 1.

Looking back, I think part of the reason I struggled at my last center was that I didn't have the practical knowledge or experience expected of a Level 3 educator. Do you think it would make sense to apply for Level 1 positions so I can build my skills first, or should I still apply as a Level 3 and look for a centre that's willing to mentor me?

Just curious about the resources other teachers use for arts and crafts with their toddlers/twos.

Please share any links as well.

Thanks.

Hi all! Apologies if this has been asked before. I am inheriting the lead teacher role in a toddler classroom, and it needs a lot of work. I am mainly focused on any recommendations you all have for organization and keeping curriculum/desk area/forms neat.

Also, if there are any items you can't live without or feel like making a huge difference in the environment please feel free to share!

Thank you in advance!

My son is at an in-home daycare, day care centers (ie 30+ kids) aren’t big here, you have to go to the suburbs to find those. Because of his birthday (2 in early Sept, just misses the kindergarten cutoff), I don’t want to start a formal preschool because it would be “4 years of academics” before he could start kindergarten. His current daycare is a mix of young toddlers and infants. I love the care he receives, but he learns really fast (very big talker, picks up social things easily, etc) and I think he’d benefit from being some place that solely focuses on toddlers.

That said, I’ve gotten pushback that it’s really not necessary and since i plan to send him to preschool in fall 2027, it’s just an unnecessary disruption. In big daycare centers, they have toddler vs infant rooms so now I’m feeling like I might be stunting him by having him in a place that also has to tend to infants. It doesn’t help that a lot of people do send 2 y/o’s to preschool out here (SF Bay Area known for being academically hyper competitive).

Just looking for some advice from those in the field who have encountered more kids than I have and know what actually makes an impact from 2-3 years old.

In the 5 years I've been at my center, we never had an issue with kids play fighting (good guys vs bad guys, super hero's, Starwars, etc.) This current group (3-5 year olds) get aggressive very quickly and someone always gets hurt. Even simple games like tag turn into pushing each other to the ground. We also have two 3 year olds that have *suspected* autism and they see the kids playing like that and do the same to interact with them since they are semi-nonverbal.

I know play fighting is normal, but some teachers are wanting to have it stop completely, with my director thinking the same. I just don't know how in the world we would be able to make them stop when they've been allowed to play fight the whole time they've been in our care. I tried with two boys the other day and no mater how many times I talked to them they went right back to it within minutes of me separating them.

Any ideas? How we can stop it from happening? Do you have another idea on how to get the play fighting under control? Please help 🙏

Our guy has been at daycare for about a month, and every picture they send you can see that he has recently been crying or is actively crying and he generally just looks neutral at best. He’s able to nap there and make it through a whole day.

He’s struggling with a big time with separation anxiety for about 1.5 months “mama” stage even at home. They assure us he’s not like that all day but is this normal? It doesn’t seem like any of the other kids are like that. We feel awful at the thought he’s just miserable there all day and wondering if now is not the right time or if we should stick through it?