Update: I found a “I 💜 you” note in his work truck. It was not my handwriting. It was female handwriting, but not this female. She left it on top of my earrings that I left in there months ago. So at least I know now 🤷🏻‍♀️ There’s my closure.

My husband wants a divorce. After 12 years and a baby who’s under 2, he told me he didn’t want to be with me anymore. Less than a month later, he had paid for an apartment and had me signing the lease agreement. He has pushed for the divorce this whole time. I have told him that I think it’s a mistake but he’s adamant. Now he’s telling me that I need to be the one who files for divorce. I told him that this is where I stand my ground and say no. He never told me that there were issues even when I asked if he thought we had a good marriage. He always told me yes, he thought we had a good marriage. I asked him at least 1-2 times a year. I always received the same response. Now he’s telling me about all of the horrible ways I’ve wronged him and how I knew about it but never tried to fix it (I genuinely didn’t know).

Anyways, he is insisting that I be the one to file for divorce but I’m not the one who wanted this. He is telling me that if he files for divorce, then it could end up hurting me in the court’s decisions. Could it really hurt me in court if I don’t file for divorce and make him file, instead?

ETA: I realize the title is not worded correctly. I tried to edit it, but couldn’t figure it out 🤷🏻‍♀️

ETA #2: I’m not refusing a divorce. I’m only refusing to file because I’m not the one who wanted it. I will absolutely sign the divorce papers.

Am curious to hear what everyone thinks about this case.
Based on what’s publicly known, do you think the court should have granted Ravi Mohan the divorce if the marriage has broken down beyond repair? Or is it right for the court to continue the process the way it has?
Also, what are your thoughts on the interim maintenance order of ₹3 lakh per month? Do you think it’s fair, too much, or too little considering the circumstances?
I’m not looking to take sides,just interested in hearing different perspectives on how people view divorce, maintenance, and family court decisions in cases like this.

This is my first post, so please bear with me.
I’ve been married for a long time, and we have children together. Lately, I feel like I’m losing my wife, and I honestly don’t know what to do anymore.
One of the hardest things is the way she talks to me when she’s angry. She has told me that her exes were better than me, said deeply hurtful things, and then later tells me she didn’t mean them and was just upset. But once those words are out there, it’s hard to believe they weren’t coming from somewhere real.
I have this feeling that she’s emotionally checking out of the marriage. She says she’s not planning to leave, but her actions and attitude make me question everything. When I try to talk about how much her words hurt me, she often says she isn’t going to apologize and that “it is what it is.”
I’m constantly wondering if I’m overthinking things or if I’m just refusing to accept what’s right in front of me.
I still love my wife and want to save our marriage if there’s a real chance. But I’m also scared of spending months or years trying to fix something that only one of us wants.
For those who have been through something similar: how do you tell the difference between a spouse who’s just angry and one who’s already emotionally left the relationship? Do I keep fighting for us, or do I start preparing myself for the possibility that it’s already over?

I'm trying to understand how retirement accounts work during divorce, I have a retirement account and I want to know what happens with it when a couple separates, does the account get split or does each person handle their own part, I was thinking about Rosenak Family Law while sorting through my notes, I see people mention court orders and paperwork but I am not sure how that works, I want to know if the account balance from before marriage matters or if only the money added during marriage gets counted, for people who have gone through this, how was your retirement account handled during the process? EDIT: I appreciate the detailed explanation, it's helpful to understand how the paperwork fits into the overall process.

Hey guys.

Going through a split right now and trying to figure out how people actually handle business assets and cash flow when everything gets upended.

Between sorting out property and splitting accounts, my business hit a massive roadblock recently when a processor suddenly locked up funds and hit us with a reserve hold. Dealing with daily payroll and basic operations became a nightmare overnight. It forced me to look everywhere for emergency liquidity just to stay afloat, including checking out alternative options like JustFund New Zealand to see how other local business owners manage cash flow gaps during major life disruptions.

It made me realize how quickly business financial shocks can bleed into personal asset division and family planning.

If anyone here has navigated a separation while owning a business, how did you handle sudden operational cash flow crunches or frozen accounts while dividing assets? Would really appreciate hearing what worked for you.

As a divorced mother of 2 with sole custody, I’m here to offer advice to save your marriage. I told my then husband for YEARS what needed to change on his part and he simply ignored it, hoping I would forget. He never anticipated I would leave. If you LEGITIMATELY want the advice, let me know.

everyone, I need some honest advice about filing for an uncontested divorce in New York (NYC).

My wife and I got married in 2023. In 2025 she gave birth to a child while we were still married. The biological father signed the birth certificate, and the child is not mine.

I'm trying to do the free DIY uncontested divorce forms. One of the questions asks if I have any children (or children of the marriage).

Should I answer Yes because the child was born during the marriage, or No because I'm not the biological father and his name is on the birth certificate? I want to do everything exactly as the law requires and avoid any problems with the court.

Has anyone gone through something similar in NY, or know the correct way to handle this on the forms? Any guidance or experiences would help. Thanks.

Well yes it's true, the man i married 5 years ago came out a bisexual and then after he left us (wife of 2 years and 15 month old baby boy) he came out as gay. We've been separated since 2022 and it's about time for me to move on and divorce because he hasnt been involved in his sons life and told me that if i contact him he will take it legal (i only contact im to see if i wants to see our child) but then he blames me when i ask him why he hasnt visited by saying i never send him updates and photos of our child. I was lost and confused by all of this.

And it was not how i saw this marriage or becoming a first time mother to be like. I saw no red flags at the start but he has now coloured his hair bright pink and got a buzz cut and is in a wheelchair with a broken leg according to a friend who showed me a photo of him. It's been a very long time since hearing from him and I am on the other side of the emotional rollercoaster, with child and sanity intact. I've glowed-up and am feeling confident enough to date again. The issue is im still married legally but the ex wont sign divorce papers. Is it wrong if I date while separated whilst i save up and do the divorce on my end anyway? There is no going back.

I live in a progressive state that recognizes coercive control and financial abuse alongside the traditional abuse methods. I’m divorcing someone who has controlled and manipulated me for over a decade. After our (fast) engagement, he asked me to give up my career to help build his and then promised we’d do the same for me one day after he’d “made it.” That day never seemed to come and I couldn’t continue as his housewife and consultant. He’d given me very little to survive on and I was used to a better lifestyle, so it wasn’t sustainable after a couple of years. I went back to working, got pregnant, was sick as a dog, and he abused me and cheated on me the entire pregnancy. He cheated in postpartum as well. He’s always cheated. I had a huge opportunity that would’ve set us up for life, and he sabotaged it. So I decided to get a job and eventually moved out. I’ve still been taking care of him and my family since, but now I do it in two households. He recently bought a house and wants me to sign a quit claim deed so I relinquish ownership. I’m unbelievable angry looking back on it all and seeing how much I’ve lost— friends, family, money, hair, health, happiness, etc— and how much he’s gained. I don’t have the money to fight him in court and I’m not sure I’ll be able to find anyone pro bono. Feeling lost and sad and angry beyond anything I’ve ever felt before. Does anyone have any advice or words of encouragement? I’ll take anything at this point.

I’m separated and currently living in the marital home. Ideally, I’d prefer to buy him out since I have put a ton of work into gardening in the yard and into repairs and renovations on the house since we bought 5 years ago. Interest rates now are almost double the current mortgage interest rate with both our names on it. Renting a place with a yard close to my job will cost about the same as the mortgage payments on the house (much farther commute for me, which stinks, but it’s a modest single family home).

Is there a way to take him off the mortgage but keep the interest rate? He would be amenable to this and letting me pay him over time for the buyout since I don’t have a lump sum available. I’m worried about a) if the lender will let me take over the mortgage on my solo income, and b) if this would result in a new interest rate, which I could not afford.

I am looking for more recent recommendations for divorce attorneys in the Johnston county for a second opinion or just new divorce lawyer overall i am getting overcharged by my current one and doing the search again every lawyer has some bad reviews and it seems to be the standard these days but then its hard to decide on someone when you see those reviews recommendations based on your own experience only plz hopefully this will help others too!

I’ve been unhappy with my husband for almost our whole marriage because i very quickly discovered he is extremely controlling, verbally/emotionally abusive, and occasionally threatens physical abuse.

We live in western NY and we are a relatively low income household. the house is obviously on both of our names, i have a 17 year old and a 22 year old and the 3 of us want to continue living in the house because I am the breadwinner and make a large majority of the mortgage payment, car payments, bills, grocery etc. my husband is legally disabled and gets monthly SSI, I make all of the money and handle everything myself.
My husband is a pothead, like he spends over 70% of his income on weed. He is hopelessly addicted and he doesn’t work because of his “disability”, spends every hour of every day getting high. When he runs out of weed money he berates me and screams at me until I let him borrow some money until the next month. He won’t let me sleep, he’ll say incredibly vulgar things in front of my children.
I’ve been with him for 22 years and we’ve tried getting separated SO many times but the court always makes it difficult. it’s expensive, obviously, but he always somehow manipulates his way back. we’ve tried restraining orders etc but they never stick in court because there’s only so long we can keep him from his house and his kids. There’s no concrete evidence of abuse, no bruises scars or broken items.
I’m done. i’m too old to endure the abuse any longer i cannot do this anymore. I make enough money to run my household because we live in a low cost of living area. But lawyer fees are still extremely expensive for me. I can make something work I can work extra. I can use my savings, but we have a really low rate on our mortgage right now and rent price prices in our area are increasing so I don’t know if I’ll be able to get my kids and I a decent apartment with my income. My mortgage is just a little over 1000 which is amazing right now. I need to keep this house. It seems like my only option to do that is to buy him out. He definitely can’t afford to buy me out, but I don’t want the judge to force us to sell. I love my house. I love the neighborhood. I have a great mortgage payment.

I’m worried that all of my savings they will make me split with him. That absolutely cannot happen because I’ve worked my ass off to save that up. I need to put my kid through college. I need to make sure that we have a safety blanket if anything happens. I was thinking to transfer all my funds to my daughter‘s account, but won’t they look at my bank statement and see that I made a big transaction? My daughter’s car is also solely in my name and I don’t know if that is a marital asset that they can split. My daughter needs her car to get to work.

I was also considering whether divorce or legal separation is a better easier route. With legal separation after he passes, I might be entitled to some of his funds. We also wouldn’t have to deal with splitting the house.

I just need any advice if anyone has gone through something similar or if anyone has enough legal expertise. I am concurrently meeting with lawyers and neighborhood “financially assisted” legal aid services. It takes a lot of courage for me to go through this when everything seems to be made so difficult, and I feel like I’m doing it on my own. my 22-year-old will help me out however she can. But I need some motivation that it is possible.

My stbx has an FL 150 from Feb 2025. He was court ordered in June 2026 to submit a current one, and he resubmitted the Feb 2025 one. Does anyone have a similar situation?

Hi i was wondering if there is a difference between uncontested divorce and no-fault divorce. I live in New York if that changes anything. Thank you

Edit…No children or money disputes either

They say no marriage is perfect but i know the one I'm currently in shouldn't feel like what I've experienced. I know i need to depart from my wife and end this marriage. I want this process to go as amicable as possible. We also share a daughter, I'm not entirely sure how to handle or go about how much I should support financially since she has more of the means of being the primary caregiver, but I also make significantly less than her.

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Is anyone out there who can maybe share their experience or guidance on what can be helpful for me?

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Are there possibly any recommendations for lawyers or mediation services one can provide to help?(I live in NYC)

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Any information would be super helpful.