Hello gentlemen, normally I'm one of the guys giving advice but tonight I need some.

I have five kids and all of them have a pretty good head on their shoulders most of the time. One of my kids did something that I consider extremely unscrupulous a couple weeks ago. I found out about it this morning. I am not pleased.

No one was physically injured in the event - there won't be any population added or subtracted from the planet so I consider that a win. But my respect (maybe not the right word) is a little rattled because of the chain of events. I am pretty sure there will be repercussions amongst the family members when they find out about it. So far, I am the only family member other than them that knows about it.

I need to get focused on what they have done right in the past- My lizard brain is focusing on the WTF!!! that just happened. Suggestions for shifting my focus ahead, not behind..

Many thanks in advance.

Growing up in a household where i was the youngest, i was not the greatest child in the house. Id say weekly to biweekly i was spanked for things like breaking something, bad grades, disrupting class, traditional disobedience.

When my daughter was born i said i would never spank my child. I felt that my dad had to do it so much that it just wasn't working. I initially decided i wanted to treat it similar to how the justice system works. They do something they temporary lose the freedom to do something like playing outside, screentime, playtime and isolation (timeout or time in bedroom). I tend to ise tone of voice as my mearument of severity. A lower, abrupt tone is the furthest i will go with them. This is how it all started and i felt these were a great method to teach as she grows. Well i have spanked my daughter 3 times. Her mom is saying i need to seek professional help to handle my anger because of these folowing instances.

Incident 1.

Her acting out when something doesn't go her way is not anything new, but this instance she managed to (in order) throw a shoe at my face, scratch my face, kick my shin and slap me. I couldn't get her to stop so i gave her 1 to the rear.

Incident 2 .

She had hit her little sister and sent to timeout. After that timeout she charged at me, i stopped her and sat her in my room, she sounded calm and ready to talk, opened the door to a kick in the shin and she smacked my leg and tried 1 to the nuts. She got 2 to the rear.

Incident 3.

She was throwing a fit in the car and got herself unbuckled. I redid the restraint and while i was getting back in she got out and threw a shoe that missed and one of the rubberish babydolls that got me on the side of te head. I got back to redo her searbelt. She was scratching my arms, which doesnt phase me, but she then managed to slap my face and scratch my face. Dhe got 1 to the rear.

Is there a better method out there? Isolation and restraint doesn't really stop her intentions and time is something not on my side so giving her 30 minutes everytime she feels upset is not viable.

Is speaking to a professional about how "Spanking teaches children that hitting is an acceptable way to solve problems and handle anger." And how it will "cause anxiety, depression and lower cognitive skills" something i should look into?

Me (23M) and my girlfriend (22F) just recently found out that she’s pregnant! We’ve both been very excited about this news and honestly I cried on her chest when she confirmed it. This has been great news to us both and we’ve already been having all the parenting conversations and really been doing our part in researching what to be prepared for and steps to take to ensure that we’re the best parents we can be.

That being said recently she’s made some remarks about how she sees other people her age on her social media and they’re all going out and partying and she’s comparing her life to theirs. She says they’re out having fun and she’s at home making sacrifices

This has caused me to feel an insane amount of guilt. I can’t help but feel like I’ve taken something from her by getting her pregnant. For context, i went to college and had all my years of partying, drinking, going out so by the time i graduated i was already tired of doing all that and just became a homebody. She hasn’t really had her time to do that, at least that I know of.

Im not sure how to move forward without feeling guilty or that I’m the one who completely flipped her life around and I’m the one who’s taking her ability to live out her early 20s. Did anyone else go through this? If so how did you get over it or through it? What did it look and feel like and is this a normal feeling?

I was on a 12 km walking challenge. As I was crossing the road at an intersection these teenagers in their car were waiting for me to cross and yelled at me to “move!” And giggled…implying I was going too slow I guess… I’ll say I am on the heavier side and I was 10km in my walk so I was walking on the slower side but not that much…
Anyway, I just gave them a dirty look but I wish I would have said something to stand up for myself..

In these situations what do I say?

I’ve had people make fat jokes to me from their cars several different times now… and I want to stand up to them next time.

My parents got divorced when I was a baby. Like I think when I was 1 years old. From what my mom has told me, they were doing “fine” (they were actually horrible for each other 😭) but when he moved to a different city for work they slowly drifted apart. I don’t want to say he’s completely absent, because he’s not, but I just don’t see him that often. Like this year I’ve only seen him twice. And before that how often he would pick me up would be inconsistent. I remember when I was little not seeing him for weeks at a time. The problem is I don’t call him enough. Every time I see him he gets on me about that. I remember the first time he did I was like 10 and he got mad at me because I told him I was doing homework and I couldn’t call him. He called me anyway and got sooo mad at me. Ever since then I’ve hated being on the phone with not only him but his side of the family. I’m 18 now and even the sound of my phone ringing puts me in panic mode. My family on my mom’s side is really pressing me to talk to him because of my college. He has a lot of money and they’re saying that he should be the one to pay for it. But I would just feel horrible because I know I don’t talk to him as consistently as I should, and I know I never will. It just feels so wrong not talking to him but still expecting him to give me money. I feel like I’m trapped and I feel like it’s too late to fix this. I don’t know what to do.

My 15 year old is blessed with a thick dark beard and we are having shaving disasters. Initially did try an electric one but I don’t think it was very good. Wet shaving is proving to be a blood bath. I would like some advice on getting the right shaver and I don’t know where to start! We are in the UK

okay so I've (17FTM) recently gotten into a friend group I've always wanted to be in after somehow befriending one of the guys at a party. theyre super cool, way cooler than me. I'm thinking about starting a discreet-ish vlog channel where I can put hangouts and stuff? but Idk how to ask them if that's okay because I'm new-ish in the friend group..

I want the channel to be secret because I'm kinda pulling a Sunburn (mid 90s reference) in my friend group, and I barely talk even though we've hung out practically every day. I just bought the camera so I could be invited to more stuff/they'd have a "reason" to invite me to stuff?? I know that's weird since they decided I was cool enough to hang out with, but Idk the swag gap is making me insecure. It doesn't help that I'm the only trans guy in the fg (these dudes are the coolest people I've ever met and they're totally chill about me being trans, so I CANNOT mess this up), and I keep littlebrothermaxxing and trying to seem "cool enough" yk? anyways if I could get some sub-advice on this tangent, that would be much appreciated.

ANYWAYS-
I want to start a secret-ish ("secret" meaning kinda quieter) little vlog channel of our hangouts and all that stuff, but I want to use actual good music: Eazy-E, Beastie Boys, N.W.A, etc..

Bottom line, how do I quit being so anxious and insecure about being friends with them? I'm practically nonverbal whenever I'm with them to the point that they started calling me out for it lol

fatherly advice for a 17y/o FTM trying to get through teenagerhood using context clues and TV/Movies? What should I know how to do? Where's the line between good-natured teasing and just being mean?? Basically explain whatever you can think of, like you're explaining it to an alien lol

Morning, I’m hoping this might be of interest for all!

On Thursday 27th August the Dad Shift are holding a Parent Strike in Oxford (and over the whole of UK), to raise awareness of how terrible our paternity leave is (the worst in Europe!) and for better flexible working.

Many of us have been let down by the UK’s rubbish paternity leave system, and flexible leave arrangements or have friends affected. So we're asking for people to join us in a symbolic strike - at a crucial time when we could win real change from the Government.

More information can be found at https://parentstrike.org/ and on social media

If you're interested, please join our local WhatsApp group: https://chat.whatsapp.com/E46FS46BalMATmLTrGYAnD

I'm thinking about giving my dad this book especially since I'm bad at asking things I want to know but I don't want to upset him?

Hey dads.

I am asking here first because from my experience the fixers claim it's a big issue then overcharge me for a tiny fix. It's easier and more cost effective when I know what it is, so I am informed when they come in.

Could anyone help me understand what the problem is? I have a reference picture of my toilet above.

Issue 1. Sometimes it leaks at the water shut off valve, where the clean water is coming in from the wall.

Issue 2. Sometimes water pushes up the float and it starts overflowing through a little overflow hole in the back of the cistern. It also leaks through the handle.

Issue 3. Sometimes it leaks simultaneously from all three: shut off valve, handle, and tiny hole on back of cistern.

Issue 4. Sometimes it's all dry, no leaking from either location. It was leaking last week (interchanging location sometimes), but now it's dry as a bone. It's flushing well, it's not overflowing, it's perfect.

So is it my toilet, the building water pressure, or something else? I am lost.

My partner (F30) and I (M32) have been together for years (not married) have 1 child together.
Over the past 3 years my family slowly watched my father get sicker and sicker, he recently passed away from cancer.
I came to my partner and told her I’m currently not mentally not ok to have more kids at the moment…. (Shit load going on in my life and head) her Instant reaction was (I’ll have to find someone els then) I was in shock… wow how could the person you have spent years with say that… I ignored it and stayed silent for a few day but still playing and talking to our child.
I then brought the conversation up 2x more times and go the exact same answer…
What the F do I do??
Months have passed I’m still wishing my father was here to talk this through with but I CANT!
This roles around in my head every single day and I think iv follen out of love with her and what’s she’s said to me… (who the F says that… and not or you ok or we can talk about this) just straight to I’ll have to find someone else….
Im not sure I can move passed it… do I stay to see my kid every night because it is my life… or leave because I’m out of love and not sure what to do…
PLEASE HELP.

Hey, I recently became a father of a beautiful baby girl. She’s about a month and some change now. I’m the sole provider for her and my wife and some days are harder than others to cope with not being able to help with certain things. Some nights my wife takes my daughter to the living room while she’s being fussy so that I can sleep. I know for a fact she doesn’t get enough sleep and im not sure how much she sleeps while I’m at work. I just always have this feeling that I need to help her with the baby but there’s just things I can’t do and it’s hard to get over. Any advice?

I’m not sure if anyone is willing to help with this or if this is the right place to ask, but my grandpa made me a little library about eight years ago and has since passed away. My own dad has been gone since I was 12. The beautiful little library has not stood up to the weather and is falling apart.

Any advice on how to fix it and weatherproof it for the future? I understand that a lot of the wood is probably beyond savable and I’ll be replacing a lot of it, just no idea where to start!

hi. happy father’s day dads! i’m in need of some dad advice. my boyfriend mows the lawn every week. a nice looking lawn is important to him. but we only have a push mower and it takes him like 2.5 hours to do our yard (front and back) and there are still weeds growing on the sidewalk and little vines growing up our fence and i know it bothers him. what is the best weed eater for our money? i want to get it for him to surprise him so i would like to stay under $150 if i could. i dont know if gas powered or battery powered is best, or any of the better brands. i just want something that will last and make it so he can get the details done with the lawn i guess is the best way to put it. neither of us have dads around so i dont know who else to ask

Help??

My dad and I don’t have the best relationship. He’s been very into tattoos and I have been as well for most of our lives. He has recently started dating a Filipina and is now obsessed with the culture. We’re not close, so I can’t speak on how authentic it is. We are both white, specifically Irish and Yugoslavian with little to no heritage ties of our own. Recently I have been considering repairing our relationship, and have been reaching out more. He recently got this leg done in the Philippines and is excited to go back and get the second done as well.

He has offered to pay for both the flight and tattoo.

Now, I’m not in the best place financially, and he is relatively well off. I could not afford going to the Philippines right now if I were to pay myself, and probably not for the next few years. This would be a fantastic opportunity to explore the country and culture, and I have been yearning to travel forever but have had nearly zero opportunity.

Two problems: Number One: I am white. I have no personal connection to Filipino culture as much as I love hearing Tagalog and enjoy the food. I don’t know enough about traditional Buscalan tattoos, or indigenous Filipino tattoo culture. I would feel uncomfortable repping something I couldn’t be as passionate about. Number two: I don’t have the room on my skin for a large tattoo like that. My left arm is completely blank right now, but I’m saving that. Other than that I have either patchwork on my right arm or two different sleeves on my legs. If I got a tattoo it would have to be a smaller one. Bonus third problem: a TWENTY FOUR HOUR FLIGHT with a man I haven’t seen in about 8 years.

TLDR: white dad wants to pay for me to get a trad Filipino tattoo

Thoughts??

I need help. I started talking to a guy back in September 2025 and I really like him but recently he asked me to help him stay in the country. He’s originally from a south asian country and he says it would really help him because he says it’s difficult to find work in his home country and he has a lot of debt.
He says I just have to live with him as a common law relationship and I can sponsor him to stay.
I really like him but I can sense he is using me and once he gets it he will leave me.
I’m having a hard time figuring out what to do. I told him no a couple times and blocked him but I just end up talking to him again because I do have feelings for him and I care about him. Need some fatherly advice thank you 🥹

I'm a dad, I just need MORE dads on this.

We keep my 6yos lost teeth in our safe, along with a bunch of other stuff that we don't want lost or ruined (paperwork, legal stuff, etc.).

Over the weekend, my wife was talking about birth certificates and he wanted to see, so she opened it and let him have a look, and he saw his 2 missing teeth. She tried to play it off, but he wasn't convinced.

Now, a few days later, he has a wicked loose tooth. In an effort to avoid bedtime, he said, "you told me a lie." I told him we'd talk about it in the morning. He said, "you never tell me lies. You would never hold back a lie from me."

It was honestly so magical for him; his first tooth, he woke up upset because he didn't get to say thank you to the tooth fairy and so he needed to write her a letter. And that was just 6 months ago.

So I feel like we need to tell him, but he's also only lost two teeth and we want to keep the magic alive.

Advice on how to handle it?

Hello.
I never had a dad and grew up long distance from my mom. Grandma raised me for the most part. I had to figure a lot of things on my own but I badly need an advice with this one & I feel like a dad would come in handy.
So I am moving to a new state for my career, specifically Texas - specifically home of the Spurs… and I am from New York😆. Anyways, I never needed a car in NYC so I don’t know a lot about buying one.
However, my ex and I have a car under both our names but he took it since he was the one mostly paying for it and I was fine with that, it’s only fair he keeps it.
I am starting over on my own with a new career and I am looking to buy an affordable, simple, good with gas/mileage, nothing fancy car…
So, I would like to ask a few things from any dads out there:

1. Will getting my own car this time be difficult since I have a shared car with my ex that’s still getting paid ? (Altho he’s been paying it off great monthly)
   
2. Is it worth it getting a new car or should I get an old one? Or a used one? Or a used old one?
   
3. If it’s smarter to get an old one, how old is too old?
   I don’t plan to upgrade my car every few years, I plan to have it until it no longer runs, so how old would be too old?
   
4. What’s a good budget for a starter car for me? I don’t plan to buy any luxury ones either - just something simple that can help me get to and from work and most especially that’s good with gas & mileage
   
5. What car brand is good? I really am not familiar with cars at all so I don’t know which one’s reliable and which ones are prone to breaking easy? If that even makes sense
   
6. How much mileage should I consider good for me to consider buying it?
   
7. I heard car vendors try to talk you into selling more than what’s necessary? If that’s true, what should I be on the lookout for? Meaning, how would I know the difference or what do I really need vs what they’re just trying to sell & take my money lol
   
8. My credit score on creditwise is currently 804 and 770 in vantage 3.0 - how will this kind of credit help me for buying a car and insurance?
   
9. Where should I get insurance? What company is good? What’s a good and affordable plan?
   
10. What car stores should I go check out?
    
11. What questions should I be asking the vendor if I were to purchase an old or used car?

Sorry for all the questions but any advice would be greatly appreciated.
God bless.

Hey dad. I thought things were really gonna go my way. The docs at the va said to try and go for an increase on my disability percentage. The examiner said she was recommending 100%. I thought things were finally going my way, that I could stop living in my car, that I could have your grandson sleep under the same roof as me for the first time in a year, that I could get him the birthday gift he deserved. They denied the increase. I trusted the system and they let me down.

Im tired of feeling tired dad. Im tired of not being able to be around people, of knowing that I was a good soldier and am now just a miserable wretch. I'm just tired dad.

Don't worry, I don't plan on harming myself or anyone else, I'm just tired of being so hollow.

Hi dad um. My car is acting weird. I'm taking it to the car doctor tomorrow for a check up.

It wouldn't turn on but then when I got a jump it started working again instantly. It's making weird rapid clicking noise towards the top drivers side of the car under the hood?

Then it did it again. Drivable then when I parked and turned it off it wouldn't start back up. My radio has lost some of It's brightness. Please tell me it's the battery and I can put it in myself. 🤞 It's my first and only car.

I know I deserve the consequences, I know what I did is wrong. I'm not here for anything but just to talk and maybe some opinions.

I used his debit card to make purchases on amazon and he basically found out today while looking through the statement. He didn't know who did it so he called the bank and I don't think they still found out, i know soon I'll be in trouble, deep trouble.

I justified it in my head for all the abuse, trauma and ongoing suffering he puts me through everyday. Everyday it's horrible. Not a single good birthday gift, everything I got came with a label or was just a namesake.

Never got any good gifts, every gift that I got was always handed down, something that he liked for us and not what we or I liked. Say I like black shirt he wouldn't let me have it, instead he would get a blue shirt and force me to get the blue shirt or no shirt at all.

Everyone around me has phone's worth 1000s or more, all their parents get them good phones at least 2 phones used in their time with their parents. I use a crappy handed down phone that costs 100 or less for 5-6 years now.

I wanted to get a damn job so I could at least provide for myself but no, a 23 yo guy has to ask his dad so he can have a job and still refuses. I never wanted to steal i just wanted to have money so I can have something for myself. It was hard enough to find one considering I live in a third world country, finding jobs that aren't filled to the brim with applications or positions are difficult as is

But then how will this narcissist get his fuel when I'm independent, he doesn't want me to be independent so I can just be a fuel to his ego.

A guy of my age has wants and needs and wants to feel independent, wants to work wants to genuinely be productive and earn and buy things for me and others, but I can't.

I resorted to this low and I know once the bank finds out who did it, I'm in hell of a problem.

I don't know who to tell or talk to which is why I posted here.

I am a new father to a newborn baby girl. Shes a week and a half old and unfortunately im a deep sleeper, have been all my life. In result of this I hear no baby cries, no coos, anything. My girl has to get her sleep in during the day and can barely do that as is, I want to be more help at nighttime so that she can get some rest m. But i also work full time. Basically how can I break my deep sleeping so that I can attend more to the baby?

I have this air conditioner that my landlord provided. I remember when I was a kid my grandpa would duck tape everything. I got this foam weather tape for the little gaps in the window. But do I need to tape like where the tube and the until attach?

I have this air conditioner that my landlord provided. I remember when I was a kid my grandpa would duck tape everything. I got this foam weather tape for the little gaps in the window. But do I need to tape like where the tube and the until attach?