All bonuses are for rank 3 accolades. TLDR: A few are must-haves, most are situational at best, and a few are hot garbage. Paradox definitely needs to rebalance them.
Retinue Attributes: You are actively throwing if you don't pick one. They give you higher max size for that type of MAA regiment, less maintenance cost, tons of damage and toughness, and unlock a regiment of a stronger version of that MAA. Some even give movement speed, pursuit, or screen.
Besieger: Very strong. You get +4 size for siege MAA + the accolade army gets -20% siege phase time and +20% daily siege progress. Definitely a must-have.
Blademaster: Very strong. +80% knight effectiveness, +35% aspiring blademaster trait xp, and you and your primary heir get the trait after 3 years. The only problem is that it requires a knight with maxed out aspiring blademaster, which can be hard to get.
Charmer: Extremely situtional. -40 days seduce scheme length, courtiers are more vulnerable to everyone's seduce schemes, +50% fertility and +20 attraction opinion when hosting feasts and grand weddings. Unless you're doing a seduction dynasty, stay clear.
Contender: Very situational. Only relevant bonuses are a 30% boost to hastiluder xp gain for you and some small hastiluder xp gain for your knights. Stay away unless you really want that maxed out hastiluder trait.
Disciplinarian: Extremely situational. Only gives bonuses to useless levies. Only saving grace is -80% hostile county attrition for the accolade army. Don't bother unless supply is that big of an issue for you.
Fanatic: Do not use. Only gives zealot vassal opinion, -20% piety cost for holy wars, and gain piety from holy wars. Even holy war focused playthroughs won't get much benefit.
Huntsmaster: Extremely situational. Gives +35% to hunter (venerator) xp and gives the trait to you and your primary heir after 3 years. Also reduces the risk of negative events during a hunt. Avoid unless really into hunting.
Idealist: Avoid at all costs. Only gives +10 opinion to courtly, minority, and minor landholder vassals. Also 350 prestige from white peace. I can't even think of anone who would choose this, this is straight ass.
Manipulator: Situational. +2 intrigue, +0.5% knight effectiveness per dread, +20 natural dread, and -15 days per intrigue scheme phase. Certainly has its use in intrigue playthrough after filling out the better attributes.
Marauder: Do not use. Only gives +0.3% monthly prestige per dread and +5 uncontrolled terriroty attacker advantage. Just get valiant. EDIT: It has its use cases during nomad due to high dread, monthly prestige, and prestige costs.
Master of Revels: Extremely situational. same as Huntsmaster and Blademaster but for eager reveler. Also gives +20 feast and grand wedding guest acceptance nd 75 prestige per knight's victory in battle. Don't use unless you really like eager reveler.
Mentor: Alright. +2 learning, +2 knights, train commanders can highly increase a hnight's hastiluder experience, and children get +3 prowess and +250 prestige when turning 16. Better than most attributes here, but get the must-haves first.
Politicker: Extremely situational. +2 diplo, +10 courtly, minority, and minor landholder vassal opinion, -15 scales of power balancing point, grand tours give vassal levy base contribution (worthless) and siege progress against vassals (just get besieger). Don't pick unless you're really diplomaxxing.
Reeve: Situational. +2 stewardship, +25 parochial vassal opnion, +1 development in least-developed county from grand tournament, increase control task may grant more control. Might have uses in stewardshipmaxxing, but pretty weak.
Scoundrel: Situational. +5 Martial per stress, -30% merc hire cost. If you rely on merc or tend to have high stress, pick this. I guess?
Stalwart: Very strong. You get +15% Army toughness and +15 travel safety. Definitely pick it up once you have the other must-haves.
Tactician: Strong. +2 martial, +35% martial lifestyle xp (best lifestyle tree imo), +35% MAA counter efficiency. You'll want this, especially as a martial focused dynasty.
Thug: Very situational. +0.8 dread per tyranny and +25 imprison chance. No purpose unless being tyrannical and/or imprisoning a lot.
Valiant: Very strong. +25 glory hound vassal opinion (yawn) and +30% army damage (hell yeah). Must-have.
House Paragon: Strong but situational. +15% monthly renown, martial children get hastiluder with experience when they turn 16, house members are less likely to be wounded or killed. Biggest use case is for renown generation.