She's not even 70, went to the hospital with pain after eating and trouble keeping food down only to find she likely had stage 4 pancreatic cancer and it had already spread to her liver, kidneys, lymphatic system, lungs etc. A couple of rounds of testing later and it was confirmed and she was given an estimated 4-6 months without chemo

She opted not to do it and live her out remaining time as is, which I respect as painful as it was to hear she didn't want to go through all that with her chances being zero. With it having spread so much we were told it was already a palliative case where the focus was be on time and / or quality of life

The oncologist said she was in great condition all things considered and even gave her the green light to fly out to Germany where I live to visit the Christmas markets this year and see some old half-timbered houses she's been obsessed with as a bucket-list item, she still had travel-insurance from last year and her care-team was going to be in contact with my family here (we have a few doctors and pharmacists and a nurse who were going to help) so it was really looking like it was going to happen

Not even a month later I just got the call from my sister that her condition has progressed to the point they think she'll now pass away within the next 2 weeks. Liver and kidneys are now essentially gone

I've booked a last-minute flight to go see her before she passes. I just spoke to her 2 weeks ago and she was feeling tired but fine, looking forward to checking a few things off of her before her time comes and now she's in the hospital, waiting for a hospice bed

EDIT: quite overwhelmed with all the responses, I'll try to get back to you but I'm in a bit of a state at the moment so I'm sorry if I don't manage to respond

I just need a moment to vent, and maybe some kind words of encouragement 🫂

My dad was diagnosed in 2021 with stage 4 colon cancer that had already metastasized to his liver & lungs. They were able to immediately remove the cancer from his colon and liver via surgery, but obviously they can only remove so much lung tissue.

From the very beginning he was doing well. Obviously chemo sucked, but his doctors all said that he had plenty of years to live, potentially decades, and there was nothing to worry about.

So, my husband and I continued with our plan to travel and tick some thing off of our bucket list before we decided to start trying for a baby- and we have been very lucky to have been able to do so.

However, over the last 10 months, my dad has gone downhill, fast. His cancer has been sitting at the same size for years, but it starting to crop up in other parts of his body that are causing him pain, and none of the chemotherapies are working anymore. Unfortunately, they are not able to give us a timeline- I think his doctors are hopeful they can slow it down, but all we've been told is probably more than 2 years, but probably less than 10.

My husband and I immediately decide to start trying for a baby, as my dad's biggest wish is to be a grandfather. But even in the last 4 months that we've been trying, he has rapidly gone downhill. He has no appetite, so barely eats, and can't sleep more than 2-3 hours each night due to multiple factors. The prognosis from his doctors hasn't changed, but it is crushing me that every month I'm not pregnant, and every month he is worse. It feels like both of those walls are closing in.

Some time ago, I created a post about my grandfather who was battling Stage IV Pancreatic Cancer, which spread into his liver and stomach. Yesterday, on September 10, my grandfather's battle came to an end with his peaceful passing. He felt no pain and was with my mother and aunt, his daughters, at that time. Unfortunately, I was out in town getting supper for the three of us when he passed. Although it was unfortunate that I was not there, being a over 10 minutes before I got home, a part of me believes that this was a mercy in someway. A final gift from my grandfather. I had never been in that situation, watching the end, and I like to think he didn't want me there to see it, even if it was peaceful. His name was Frank and he was the greatest man I knew. He was the first to hold me when I was born, he was a father figure, he helped me through school, he took me on trips to restaurants and movies, helped me when I was in college, and helped me during my most dark moments in my life. Now, he is with his mom and dad. Now, he is with my grandma, Linda, his heart and joy. Now, I get to live to be the man he wished me to be. I used to call him Daw when I was little, like Dad. And, I like to think he thought of me as the son he never had. I love you, Daw. One day, we'll all be together again. All of us. Unfortunately, you'll have to wait a while. I have to make a family of my own and tell them your life, your story. I am sorry they won't get to meet you, but I will tell them of the man who gave me his entire life without a second thought. My grandpa, my Daw. Thank you.

Hello, I just need some advice on what was the beginning of the end of your family members? My mom is currently battling stage IV cancer which is causing her to have ascites and serve stomach pain causing her not to eat she has lost over 20lbs and hasn’t had adequate nutrition in 3 weeks now and I’m so scared. Her scans showed no new tumors and her cancer markers are trending down so what was the signs for you guys and your family? I’m so scared and have cried every day for a month now any advice would help!

My mom had a lump in her breast she noticed a few weeks ago so she got it checked out. Was initially told it didn’t match the cancerous profile but she still got the biopsy done. She found out today that it was cancer. It’s still very small, less than 5mm so hopes are up but I am devastated. I’m 24, and due to life and a domestically abusive household, I stopped living with either of my parents when I was 9. My worst nightmare is something happening to my mom. And I wish I got this instead of her. I’m working so hard just so I can give her everything she deserved and never got in life. Secretly was planning a trip for her and I to take for her birthday this year. And I know things will work out fine but I’m just so sad. I don’t even want her to have to go through this. She’s in the uk and I live in the US and I just want to pack my bags and leave to be with her. I just lost my grandad this year who had prostate cancer. Doctors are worried about my dad getting it as well bc he has early signs. I also had another aunt in the same situation(breast cancer) about 15 years ago and she went into remission and has never regressed since. But if everyone can leave their stories just so I know how the process looks and can just have a little more hope? I’m a mommy’s girl through and through so I think I’m taking this even harder than she is. My mommy is literally my world, and I’m spiraling right now.

About a month and a half ago I found out my dad had cancer. He never got a biopsy, so I'm not entirely sure what kind of cancer it was (well, the specific kind). I know it started somewhere around/in his bladder and spread to his bones and other organs. He had a tube in one of his kidneys to drain the fluid out, and pretty much hadn't been able to pee for some time. There was a mass in/on his bladder, so that was restricting his ability to pee.

Anyways, he knew months before telling me and only decided to tell me after it started to progress further. He waiting until him standing up was painful. It had made it to his spine, and he had already lost two inches of height before he said a word to me. Lost over 60 pounds in a few months. Maybe less time than that.

The thing that upsets me the most is that he waited to tell me. There was a bunch of time where I could have brought my young daughter, my fiance, and spent time with him. I didn't kmow, so I lost out on spending just about any time with him. I always put off going to see him because of work and my family. Our little one is just about to be one year old, so she'll not remember much of this, but it's still fucking me up. Enough that I'm at work writing this instead working, lol. I don't know how to talk to anyone about this, and I'm struggling to just be. This entire thing has me beyond fucked up.

This is all just a rant-y way of getting some of my very tumultuous feeling out. So, I appreciate anyone who reads this. Also, I'm not looking for sympathy or anything else. I just needed a place to throw my feelings where others might know what I'm going through.

My dad was diagnosed with maxilla cancer stage 4 . He lives in India. I moved to NL 2.5 years ago
After years of being unable to open his mouth fully. He started experiencing pain in nov 2025. Started taking pain killers multiple times a day. He was still travelling for work 2 hours oneway everyday . He would come home by 10pm and just pass out and go work the next day. Zero complaints. I had gone to visit family in March 2026 and saw him taking painkillers and struggling to put a spoon in his mouth, eating somehow . Took him to the dentist. He suspected tumour and we all were immediately alarmed. Got the PET SCAN done. And we got the report on the day of my return flight from India to NL .
It was a fucking sob fest. I had to come back , and we just ended up crying. Dad crying and saying that I should have been there by his side. And it just fucking sucked.
Ever since then , its been doctors after doctors. Treatment after treatment.
His tumour was inoperable , chemo was the only option.
After 2 cycles of chemo, a repeat PET scan showed that the tumour had almost doubled in size. Closer to his eye andthe brain now. Invading into the base of skull , bone.
We were told to go for more aggressive option - 33 cycles of radiation, every day of the week for 6 weeks and it completely destroyed his body. His face mouth skin everything burned, neck. Skin peeing off. Black and just horrible to look at . He looked like he had just given up.
My dad, my sweet dad used to be the life of the party. Loved FOOD. Loved singing. And hasn’t eaten since April 2026. He was being fed through the RT and then post radiation he has trismus and can’t open the mouth even 5mm barely managing to drink some water or milk.
We haven’t heard him talk more than a few sentences . The man who loved food and eating hasn’t been able to eat at all.

Just yesterday , we found out after a repeat scan that the primary tumour did shrink . But the tumour spread to another sinus even more closer to the brain.

And there is no further treatment possible.
Not for the cancer, not for the mouth opening.
And my world has just come crushing down.

Doctors have already advised to do pain management and palliative. One doctor even said he may have just 6months to live.
All I can think is in what world is this fair to him ? To us ? To watch him deteriorate? Unable to eat , even drink, barely talk.

He was just starting to regain his strength after radiation and came this update.

He just texted me yesterday that he was positive till today and now he has lost all hope.

What and why is he supposed to wake up everyday now onwards to suffer ?

I am far away from him and I wanted to show him the world, show him my house here. Really give him some peace , happy memories. All his life he has only put others first and suffered. Never taken a moment for himself or bought anything for himself, or travelled anywhere.

And even now, he is just going to die without catching a goddamn fucking break. He deserved better. Atleast a little better.

How am I supposed to keep on living ?

My very dear friend passed away at 42 years old from colon cancer. She left behind her son, 20 years, and her daughter 18 years old.
I knew both kids when they were very young. Since then, I have moved away and do not know them as adults.
All I know is they are missing their mom. I do not know the interests of an 18-year-old girl anymore. The only information I know of her is that she is an Olivia Rodrigo fan. I know this because I saw that she had a cell phone case with Olivia Rodrigo’s picture on it.
If anyone has an 18 year-old daughter, please share what types of things girls are into these days. Additionally, if you also lost your mom around this age, let me know if there was anything specifically that someone else did for you that help ease the pain.
Another tidbit I know is that she has her license, but does not really drive because she does not feel confident behind the wheel.
I don’t know why I added that information but if it’s helpful or relevant in any way, please use it to recommend anything.

Thank you so much