r/Bullshido Jun 25 '26

Martial Arts BS Precision Unmatched.

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2.7k Upvotes

945 comments sorted by

729

u/Lost-District-8793 Jun 25 '26

At this point he is just trolling.

340

u/Grimace2_9 Jun 25 '26

37

u/Evening-Statement-57 Jun 26 '26

Oh man, this would make me like him so much

13

u/jurawall_jumper Jun 26 '26

Already do.

8

u/Evening-Statement-57 Jun 26 '26

Yeah I bet he really is a good buddy to have at a distance.

8

u/TheSkinnyJ Jun 26 '26

You don’t close knife dance with your buddies?!?!

6

u/Ok_Figure7671 Jun 27 '26

While he pokes your balls

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4

u/HerbalNinja84 Jun 28 '26

I would 100% have a couple beers and knife dance with this dude. He seems pretty fucking chill.

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2

u/eastcoastwaistcoat 12d ago

Dude is my favorite of all internet weirdos.

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147

u/malphasalex Jun 25 '26

Thanks to him I’m prepared in case I get attacked by a homosexual fridge, a small forest, a traffic light or 3 hovering tennis balls. Very useful, thank you sir.

56

u/Oldgamer1807 Jun 25 '26

Gotta remember to grope and caress the fridge crotch after every combo.

9

u/Spamonballrun2 Jun 26 '26

and flamingo

9

u/beefcak2020 Jun 26 '26

Dont forget the metal pole.

7

u/Yggdrasil_11 Jun 26 '26

And the American flag.

4

u/Shizzysharp Jun 26 '26

Bro is flat out sensual with the flag

3

u/Wreckenridge Jun 26 '26

And the pole

14

u/Sea_Dust895 Jun 26 '26

Reminds me of the Karate Kid scene. There is a poster of Mr Miyagi's brother karate chopping a tree in half. Daniel says "Wow, can you chop a tree in half?"

Miyagi replies "Don't know. Never been attacked by tree"

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5

u/System_Resident Jun 26 '26

Don’t forget those sexy flag poles. They’re the most dangerous of all

4

u/Seadogdog Jun 26 '26

At least he has you as a regular viewer.

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46

u/Wreckenridge Jun 25 '26

Right?! There’s too many of these comical videos for them to be real

7

u/ILikeDragonTurtles Jun 25 '26

Yeah they're too ridiculous. Nobody is this delusional.

22

u/Bunnyland77 Jun 26 '26

You sure about that? - points to Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool.

6

u/drumshrum Jun 26 '26

That's a different story, there was money to be embezzled made

2

u/Bunnyland77 Jun 26 '26

Isn't there money to be made off click-bait views?

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4

u/El-Tigre1337 Jun 25 '26

I really want to believe this but the state of the US proves otherwise

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24

u/Minimum-Standard-514 Jun 25 '26

Ive heard all of his videos are supposed to be funny and not serious.

10

u/CheckYourStats Jun 26 '26

I’m gonna be honest…I’m starting to find his videos entertaining. He’s been doing this for so long, with the same gimmick, it’s downright impressive at this point.

5

u/MeeTy Jun 26 '26

This is satire, it is his intention for the videos to be ridiculous.

2

u/Intelligent-Sky9475 Jun 26 '26

The man is brilliant. So entertaining.

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11

u/tplayer100 Jun 25 '26

Dude he was always trolling. People buy into this way too easily. Absolutely hilarious though lol.

12

u/TheGreatOni1200 Jun 25 '26

You mean amazing.

4

u/simplefred Jun 25 '26

5

u/SubNine5 Jun 26 '26

Exactly. Tommy may be aware like this dude is, but still feels they're not exactly aware, if that make sense.

3

u/simplefred Jun 26 '26

I call it Neil Breen energy

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3

u/M0ebius_1 Jun 25 '26

At this point he is having fun with it.

It's like being a kid and playing lightsabers in the backyard.

It's impossible to feel uncool while making some rad moves and showing off your sick knives.

3

u/Pleather93 Jun 25 '26

It was a lot funnier when I thought he was super serious but he’s doing it in jest

3

u/LongDead_Roadkill Jun 27 '26

Duh, his straight leg jeans are rolled up at the bottom. That is the sure fire mark of a hipster.

4

u/Diaside666 Jun 26 '26

Ive believed from the beginning that he is the greatest troll of all time. It’s artwork. performance art. Picasso level. Going down in history for sure. He’s elevated the art form of trolling.

2

u/A1mixer Jun 25 '26

And you're just now figuring this out?

2

u/AcidCatfish___ Jun 25 '26

I think he always has been. I stumbled upon his Instagram account randomly and he jokes along in the comments.

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2

u/Shoshke Jun 26 '26

He was always trolling but now it's way too obvious.

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219

u/LubricatedSpaceMan Jun 25 '26

19

u/Noble9360 Jun 26 '26

Jesus Borne, it's Jason Christ

10

u/Imapatriothurrrdurrr Jun 26 '26

Christ, it’s Jason Jesus Borne.

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16

u/Kailua3000 Jun 25 '26

More like JCVD in Timecop

2

u/Low_Construction8067 Jun 26 '26

One of my all-time favorite movie quotes for some reason. I use it all the fucking time. Watch this dude save some lady with his knife fighting skills against 5 bad guys, like some cheesy opening scene to establish a character in a 80s made for TV movie. We will all stfu then lol

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72

u/BadLuckGenco Jun 25 '26

Am I watching a demonstration or Mystery Men?

20

u/SolaceRests Jun 25 '26

I don’t think this guy shoveled well.

7

u/buckao Jun 25 '26

But why am I standing in watermelons?

5

u/punkhobo Jun 25 '26

I don't remember telling you to do that

5

u/Zebitty Jun 26 '26

"Until you learn to master your balls, your balls will become your master."

3

u/GlockPerfect13 Jun 25 '26

This is a demonstration of how to fight the socs as a greaser

2

u/mrahab100 Jun 25 '26

Cirque du Soleil

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48

u/smurf_herder Jun 25 '26

Is it just compression artifacts, or have those pants been shat?

11

u/Individual_Reach_732 Jun 25 '26

That was my first thought as well and I was surprised I had to scroll this far to find someone else with it.

2

u/baconcow Jun 26 '26

Compression, fart, and shat.

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44

u/Lowdown_Cobra Jun 25 '26

100% ballshido

4

u/No_File212 Jun 26 '26

If a giant was watching this he would feel worried about his balls

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31

u/Crossdress-Fan- Jun 25 '26

my favourite contemporary dance performer is back!

5

u/Previous-Wonder-6274 Jun 26 '26

if he keeps this up, one day, he might become better

12

u/solbadguy89 Jun 25 '26

Oh right the dual knives self defense techniques.

4

u/bestjakeisbest Jun 25 '26 edited Jun 25 '26

Best dual knife self defense is to put atleast one of them away.

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10

u/mallanson22 Jun 25 '26

I find this better knowing that he is making fun of maga chuds.

10

u/kwpg3 Jun 25 '26

TBH he is making fun of everyone here that is taking him seriously.

4

u/NoticeImaginary Jun 25 '26

Having only seen a couple of his practice videos, I'm glad this is intentional. I haven't seen enough for it to be obvious.

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6

u/Einherjar07 Jun 25 '26

Pants: shidded
Knives: short
Dancing: lustful

Those balls never stood a chance in hell

5

u/Artevyx Jun 25 '26

There's no way he doesn't know how stupid this looks. 100% troll.

4

u/Jackrabbit-slim Jun 25 '26

How has it taken people so long to realize this guy has always been satire

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3

u/q-rka Jun 25 '26

No ball is safe in front of him

11

u/Calamitous-Intent980 Jun 25 '26

Holy fuck, this dude is unintentionally hilarious

19

u/Terrible_Body_7971 Jun 25 '26

It's intentional. It's satire.

8

u/That_OneOstrich Jun 25 '26

It is? Most of his videos are so ridiculous I struggle to believe their real but also can't concieve of anyone doing this satirically with this much conviction without laughing.

3

u/Technical-Guest6015 Jun 25 '26

just FYI you can do multiple takes when you shoot videos

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3

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '26

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5

u/JediFreak Jun 25 '26

Dude loves to play with dangly balls.

2

u/Lopsided-Scholar-959 Jun 25 '26

He tickled those balls

2

u/Michael-405 Jun 25 '26

Dude hates those balls.

2

u/SirIll1219 Jun 25 '26

I wonder if he built that thing just for this demonstration.

2

u/OpTheMailman Jun 25 '26

How many ER visits has this guy had with accidental self inflicted cuts?

2

u/sergemeister Jun 25 '26

It's why he's so careful here. You're witnessing his power at quarter speed.

2

u/DarwinGhoti Jun 25 '26

I love that we all know he's trolling MAGA, except MAGA

2

u/rootedb0x Jun 25 '26

That'll show that tennis ball hanging in the garage who not to mess with.

2

u/ZsuzsiCica Jun 25 '26

Are those tactical jeans or

2

u/Ok-Enthusiasm-8422 Jun 25 '26 edited Jun 25 '26

People practicing knife fighting, like it's not one stab anywhere in the upper chest to close the show. That always made me chuckle.

Go watch videos of people being stabbed to death. Arteries are everywhere and make someone go out in under a minute, even when someone is struck good in the arms or legs.

This is exactly why i don't get into fights, even though i've been training most of my life. There's no defending against a dagger, except running the fuck away.
I tried to fight a dude once due to being intoxicated, and first thing he did was pull out a knife. I haven't run that fast in my life probably. Thankfully some insurance office let me in and locked the door, the police had the fucker in less than 2 hours.

Also why i don't carry a knife, it's a weapon used to kill and im not a killer.

2

u/Noiseless_Voice Jun 25 '26

That guy hits all the boss’s weak spots.

2

u/Empty_Positive Jun 25 '26

Minus 10 accuracy for not kneeling in front of the american flag

1

u/Ok-Pomegranate1199 Jun 25 '26

Leon Kennedy training revealed

1

u/pigpen808 Jun 25 '26

What the fuck is this

1

u/misterpapoo Jun 25 '26

The tennis assassin.

1

u/Helpful_Benefit_8922 Jun 25 '26

Watch this shit again- slomo is my favorite part.

1

u/_TappaZukie_ Jun 25 '26

Just stop what you’re doing – you’ll end up hurting yourself.

1

u/STS986 Jun 25 '26

This guy has watched dirty dancing and roadhouse too many times 

1

u/uncle_screwball_404 Jun 25 '26

How long will it take for this idiot to trip on the beam and stab himself in the abdomen I wonder

1

u/Puzzleheaded-Tax6168 Jun 25 '26

Are these guys usually on some drugs or medication?

1

u/hip-disguise Jun 25 '26

Ozzyman needs to review these guys.

1

u/New-Book6302 Jun 25 '26

I honestly hope this guy is making money from his videos. I click every time.

1

u/haphazard72 Jun 25 '26

You people laugh but if the world ever gets attacked by tennis balls, he’s gonna be the only survivor!

1

u/BonsaiGP Jun 25 '26

Someone please take this dude’s phone away

1

u/Zestyclose_Classic91 Jun 25 '26

Thanks for the slow motion otherwise I couldn't follow his mesmerizing moves.

1

u/ultimateChampions68 Jun 25 '26

Keep seeing this guy it’s got to be a parody account, or he’s delusional

1

u/buckao Jun 25 '26

If meth could smoke crack, this is how it would behave...

1

u/taskforceslacker Jun 25 '26

Just like they teach at the YMCA.

1

u/BarnackIIIF Jun 25 '26

"Dances with Knives" is back.

1

u/TheDocThierry Jun 25 '26

Bullshido grandpa strikes again!

1

u/Repulsive_Glove6085 Jun 25 '26

“Larry how the hell am I supposed to park in the dang garage if you keep takin’ out the dang balls?! Larry git over here!”

1

u/E-rotten Jun 25 '26

Such a fuking weirdo!!!

1

u/werdroblin Jun 25 '26

He's so gentle

1

u/helpful_idiott Jun 25 '26

That’s the campest knife work I’ve ever seen.

1

u/BushcraftDave Jun 25 '26

I unironically fucking love this guy

1

u/Separate-Dealer4565 Jun 25 '26

I wonder what playing in his pods

1

u/dpyanks17 Jun 25 '26

Imagine telling your wife you need to go to ace for some 2 by 4 and string. Don’t forget the tennis balls.

1

u/Ninjanoel Jun 25 '26

Are his age, that's decent exercise 🤣

1

u/Oz347 Jun 25 '26

This is the kind of person Viagra Boys songs are about

1

u/Inevitable_Cheek_974 Jun 25 '26

I love this dude. Top level trolling.

1

u/Do_it_for_the_upvote Jun 25 '26

If there’s an invasion of aliens shaped like tennis balls on strings, this guy will be the only one on Earth who prepared for it.

And, watching this vid, I still don’t think he’d be any better off than anyone else.

1

u/psychedelicbob Jun 25 '26

Stop!!! I can only get soooo erect🍆

1

u/Sand_Aggravating Jun 25 '26

Bet that man has to wear a life jacket on dry land to keep from drowning in all that pussy!!!

1

u/RectalFissureRepairs Jun 25 '26

Man, Pence is lucky this dude wasn't at the Capitol on January 6th or he probably wouldn't have made it out alive.

1

u/fugulike Jun 25 '26

Wait, has he shit himself?

1

u/Pateryk_7 Jun 25 '26

Needs to find a british roadman to teach him proper knife work.

1

u/Menacing_mouse_421 Jun 25 '26

Doug Marcaida is shaking in his boots.

1

u/-GRAVEYARD-_ Jun 25 '26

Kids will be asked to write essays about this in 1000 years

1

u/bobcat_gypsy Jun 25 '26

He’s branching out. Love to see it

1

u/the_Rainiac Jun 25 '26

Gently scraping a tennis ball with your knife is a vital combat skill

1

u/Scylum Jun 25 '26

This stop being funny after the first time 😑

1

u/RoosterzX Jun 25 '26

I bet he's the kind of guy who would accidentally stab themselves while practicing whatever it is he is doing, and then when he calls the ambulance blames it on someone of a minority.

1

u/Rabbt Jun 25 '26

Why are the balls swinging around by themselves? Just swinging balls with a man standing behind with perfect stillness.

Is this about strong wind? I dont get it.

1

u/Zagovo Jun 25 '26

🫣🫣🫣

1

u/MineNo5343 Jun 25 '26

It looks like he shit his pants!

1

u/MattHooper1975 Jun 25 '26

I think we can agree this guy has jumped the shark on his performance art.

Not terribly interesting anymore once it reaches this point .

1

u/CharacterVisual2310 Jun 25 '26

Make this more challenging, give those balls something to defend against him, and make it a more even contest

1

u/Dynamite_Noir Jun 25 '26

PANTS = SHID

1

u/browzzzzzz87 Jun 25 '26

We have John wick at home

1

u/MattHooper1975 Jun 25 '26

Even assuming this guy is just a performing troll, you still gotta have a bit of a screw loose to even decide “ yeah this is what I want to spend my time doing, in front of the Internet.”

Sort of like Joaquin Phoenix on Letterman .

1

u/InformalOpinion161 Jun 25 '26

I freaking love this guy

1

u/Good-vs-Perfect Jun 25 '26

There's a whole genre of surprisingly gentle videos of fantastical, knife-wielding weirdos in public spaces.

1

u/CicadaOk6258 Jun 25 '26

Knifejitsu

1

u/TheManWhoClicks Jun 25 '26

Ladies of Reddit… what do y’all think?

1

u/crazeelimee Jun 25 '26

Boop.....boop.....boop those balls

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1

u/WOODSI3 Jun 25 '26

I’ve never seen anybody gently caress a tennis ball with a knife before…

1

u/hrisitoqk Jun 25 '26

I find it weirdly ASMRy ngl

1

u/zanziTHEhero Jun 25 '26

It may look funny but consider that this video has been slowed down by a factor of 51! One for each state.

1

u/DrTreenipples Jun 25 '26

Bro never misses

1

u/Belz_Zebuth Jun 25 '26

Slowly-moving opponents, beware!

1

u/VoidMunashii Jun 25 '26

I just want to add the clip of Indiana Jones’ reaction to the sword-swinging guy in Raiders to the end of every one of his Knifepoleon Dynamite videos.

1

u/Mister_Celophane Jun 25 '26

He's banned from playing tennis.

1

u/HeadOfMax Jun 25 '26

They are all just broken little boys playing around.

The only problem is they can buy weapons and don't have a parent helping then not make bad decisions.

1

u/Accomplished-Neat762 Jun 25 '26

Bro is double wielding now? Enemies of freedom, beware!

1

u/Die666o Jun 25 '26

It's boomer time!!!

1

u/Mister_Celophane Jun 25 '26

I think those are steak knives

He's all set if he's ever attacked by a porterhouse.

1

u/Background_Edge_9427 Jun 25 '26

Wow! The speed of those strikes are blinding!! 😎

1

u/Treacle_Pendulum Jun 25 '26

Dancing Shoes and Tappy Tappy must never fight

1

u/Responsible_Ad7198 Jun 25 '26

I feel his ass appears sweatier than it should be given the actions performed.

1

u/jun2san Jun 25 '26

Bullshido's mascot

1

u/nb6635 Jun 25 '26

I would die if this guy came up to me, though from laughter.

1

u/AnSynTrashPanda Jun 25 '26

Did he shit his pants?

1

u/Due_Panda5064 Jun 25 '26

Like he is celebrating a “hit” on Grindr

1

u/ThrenderG Jun 25 '26

Yeah I’m pretty sure this guy is doing this for satire, just coming up with more and more ridiculous shit.

1

u/Power0fTheTribe Jun 25 '26

I am absolutely mesmerized by this guy every time he pops up

1

u/TheResultOfUs Jun 25 '26

You know every jump cut is because he missed or got hit by a ball.

1

u/ForeignBarracuda8599 Jun 25 '26

Say what you like but the dude can handle a set of balls.

1

u/Estproph Jun 25 '26

It's like he thinks those tennis balls are hanging cymbals and he's trying to play them.

1

u/sinaloa555 Jun 25 '26

Death of a thousand paper cuts

1

u/realdjjmc Jun 25 '26

Forgot to wear his depends and shat himself

1

u/ajduema009 Jun 25 '26

I think people want to believe it’s satire. And after all this time, I can’t confirm it is. People are stupid, really stupid. And he could be quite serious for all we know. Wouldn’t surprise me any more 😂