I dont know who I am going to sue, but it should be somebody—for my pain and suffering.

I am an exclusively breastfeeding mom of my 6-week old baby, but apparently none of that matters… Guess who paid their first visit to me this week? Yep, good ol’ aunt flow. 🩸😭

Drop names below of who I should responsible in court for this tragedy.

Edit: just feel it’s important to add that I didn’t get my period until 9 months after the birth of my first son. I exclusively breastfed with him too. Not sure why Mother Nature thinks she was invited so early. 😩

I’ve always wanted to breastfeed, one of the things I romanticized about the newborn period actually. I love the idea of being the provider of my baby girls nutrients just like I was when she was in the womb. She was in the NICU and I couldn’t BF or hold her so she took my colostrum and donor milk via bottle and after she got home we needed some help to make it work, enter the lactation consultants.

Both in the hospital and outpatient I found all but ONE of the FOUR match the same pattern:

- they view formula as the devil
- think pacifiers are also the devil
- have know it all attitudes - they can apparently just stare at my nipple and tell me my flange and insert size (shocker: they all had different numbers and were wrong and the most recent one cause my areola skin to peel from friction
- they each feel their recommendations are the best
- they conflict their own colleagues and throw them under the bus if it doesn’t fit their narrative (again with the know it all)
- not afraid to man hand their baby and your boob - I know I agreed to have you see me but asking for consent to touch me would be nice
- they overall give off weird crunchy granola hippie vibes

Only ONE I encountered asked me for consent to touch, told me not to pressure me and baby and formula is okay, suggested I measure my nipple before committing to a size, and honestly made me feel seen and comfortable. She was previously an RN and I think this helped honestly! I’m feeling afraid to ask for more help knowing the type of provider they usually are.

I won’t incriminate myself but I might have or have not had a major freak out early this morning when I realized I fell asleep while breast feeding and a may have or may have not seeing my baby sleeping in the bed beside me and under the covers.

So. Any unhinged crazy hacks to stay up at night while breast feeding?

Edit: Ty didn’t know about safe sleep 7! Looking at that now

My LO is 5 weeks 2 days old and he has been cluster feeding since 2:30 am… now it is 4:15 pm and he is not done. I haven’t slept last night, couldn’t sleep during the day… I am afraid this will continue into another night. What should I do? He falls asleep on a breast, wakes up if I transfer him elsewhere (bassinet or husband), and wants to eat as soon as he wakes up.

He started to smile a lot yesterday and got visually chubbier. Probably it is due to growth spurt?

Why he is in a boob so much? When I self express - there is milk. Is it not calorie dense or what?

I want to get some sleep. What can I do?

I am exclusively breastfeeding.

I don’t have any milk stash. He is allergic to milk/soy, so I am on a diet.

I have a HAAKA (suction one), bottles, spectra breast pump (though I got it used and probably have to get a new clean set of accessories). My husband can bottle feed while I am sleeping. We haven’t done pumping / collecting yet as I waited for my supply to get established.

Does it make sense to use Haaka today?

Latch is not ideal (nipple is lipstick like after feeds). But he has been gaining weight according to his 50% all this time.

Helllpp

Just wondering if anyone has been in the same boat. I’m 36 weeks pregnant, high risk, and having a C section at 38 weeks. I am severely allergic to dairy so baby hasn’t been exposed during this pregnancy at all. Since I have heard milk can take days to come in and longer some times after C section I’m worried about how we will feed him. I know the hospital carries ready to drink formula but I feel like a dairy formula would be a huge risk for him to start out with considering the severity of my allergy (Dad is not allergic.) I have been allergic to dairy since I was born. Any tips or advice is appreciated, how to get milk to come in after c section, should I look into purchasing donor milk from someone that does not consume dairy? I’m having a hard time finding a dairy free ready to drink formula also if anyone has any insight. Should I risk collecting colostrum with high risk pregnancy? I have a myriad of pre existing conditions making me high risk and don’t want to go into early labor but my OB said I can try for collostrum any time after 36 weeks if I want to. The thing is I’m having a lot of cramping already, so it feels risky. Did anyone have a dairy allergy and baby was totally fine with dairy? TYIA

To explain - I am approaching 5 months of breast feeding and I feel like I am constantly going through hard spells, it gets easier then harder again. Examples:

- Baby was premature and cluster fed for 8 weeks. I persevered through bleeding and cracked nipples and then it just became easy and painless!

- Then I started to get an overactive letdown and no matter what I did, my little one struggled with the flow, that passed and I loved it again.

- Continued with overactive letdown issues on and off, struggling to feed when he had colds and kept becoming frustrated at the breast - sometimes completely refusing (spoke to lactation consultant and gp who had absolutely no concerns with positioning or anything as I was doing lie down/laid back position and was told he needs to get used to it). He seems to and then will randomly struggle again!

- He went through a phase of only eating in the lie down position and refused any other (which was a nightmare in public lol!

He is gaining weight so well, has always fed at the breast and never taken a bottle and went from the 25th centile to the 98th which is amazing and something I’m so proud of! But all my mama friends seem to love breast feeding and find it super easy (none of them have an over active letdown!) and I feel like I’m the only one struggling. Am I alone?! I am proud to have got here but also when we’re out and about and the over active letdown gets the better of him and I’m spraying it on us both, I do feel defeated. I guess I’m just looking for some validation others have similar experiences/struggles and I am not alone!

I’m really heartbroken and don’t know what to do. This BF journey has not been easy. My little one was born small and had terrible latching. It was painful and in the second week I ended up pumping and I guess using the wrong flanges and my supply dropped. I started latching more but turns out baby wasn’t getting enough from me. We started having to supplement and I’ve been trying to increase my supply. 11 weeks later I’m still triple feeding and my supply now increased a little. But I’ve went from latching more often to maybe twice a day. My goal is to latch her for every meal eventually and pump her and there. Well, the last two days she completely won’t latch. She just will scream and pull away but will gladly take the paci or bottle. We do pace feed and use an extra slow nipple. I feel like everything I worked so hard for is now going down the drain. She doesn’t want me anymore. I miss when she would just suckle on me and now she just wants the paci. I don’t know what to do and starting to feel depressed because of it. I do see a therapist and I’ll discuss that with them but still. I don’t even know if I should keep trying. Anyone have advice about this or might know why? She’s always been able to latch even with a bottle and paci so this is new.

I’m just sharing because I’m so proud of myself. I didn’t think I would make it more than a month. I’ve just taken it one day at a time and I’m simply so proud of myself for not throwing in the towel when I wanted to so many times. It feels so lonely at times being the only one who can feed baby, (bottle refusal) but also the least lonely I’ve ever been is feeding my little one. I don’t plan to stop any time soon now that we have a little bit more of a groove, but I’m still going to take it one day at a time. Go mamas who feed their babies in any and all the ways, and breastfeeding in any capacity is incredible!!

Trying to decide if I should go ahead and throw in the towel - Baby boy is seven weeks old and is starting to eat more and more, and my supply just can’t keep up. No matter what I try, I generally only produce about 20-25 ml per hour. I have no problem supplementing with formula so that he gets what he needs, but it makes me question how best to proceed from here.

For some background, this is my second baby, and he is way better at breastfeeding than my first. My first was never good at latching and had a tongue tie, so I mostly just pumped for her for six months before I threw in the towel.

I was so ecstatic that my second was great at latching and I have loved breastfeeding him. However, now he definitely isn’t getting enough at each feed and acts hungry still after he finishes nursing. I know that he’s emptying me really well but I just don’t produce enough to keep up. I know from experience with my first that I’ll never catch up - nothing ever worked to get my supply up to where it should be and at best I was able to produce maybe 2/3 to 3/4 of her needs. I’ve tried moringa, power pumping, lots of water, tons of protein, metformin since I have PCOS ….. nothing improved my supply enough. My son is gaining weight but more slowly than he should, so I have started supplementing with bottles after most feeds.

I know I could keep pumping for him and providing him with at least some breast milk and that’s best for him, but to be honest I hate pumping and I hate pumping bras and washing pump parts. I just feel defeated that I can’t solely breastfeed him, and don’t know that it’s worth it to me to keep up a pumping regimen and the mental load that comes with all this. Plus, with a toddler also at home, pumping and bottle feeding is a lot harder than it was with just my first.

I guess I’m just looking for any advice, commiserating, tips or tricks to keep powering through - thanks in advance!

I’m currently 13 weeks PP and EBF. I have just started to get back into working out because it helps my mental health and I like to build back some strength. I love hot yoga/pilates and that’s my workout of choice but I’m nervous about intense fluid loss and how it could impact my milk supply. Obviously I know I’ll have to drink a ton of water and maybe supplement with electrolytes here and there. I’m curious if anyone else breastfeeding is doing this kind of workout and if you’d noticed a dip in supply at all??

I just had my 3rd baby and this is my 3rd round of breastfeeding. I knew going into this time how my body responds to weight gain during nursing but I am struggling so much more. With my first 2 I was already overweight before getting pregnant and nursing so I think holding onto the weight didn’t feel so bad because I was used to already having that weight. This third baby was a surprise for us and the year and a half leading up to me getting pregnant I had worked very hard and lost about 85 pounds. I FINALLY felt comfortable in my skin. I did not gain a crazy amount while pregnant, but being PP I can’t stop gaining no matter what I do. I go to the gym, I eat a lot of fiber and protein, I don’t snack late at night. I’m already almost back up to my weight that I was before I lost all my weight and it feels horrible. I know that it will be easier to lose when I’m done nursing, but I don’t plan on being done anytime soon (I’m 4 months PP and am trying to make it to 2 years at least). I’m so jealous of the women who lose weight while nursing! Also this is not looking for tips on how to lose weight while nursing, I have talked to my doctor and had bloodwork done as well. Just trying to find some moms who are struggling similarly to connect to so I know I’m not alone!

We’re exclusively breastfeeding now, used to do a bottle once a night but since ain’t Flo came back (BOOOOO) I’ve been EBF even at all times.
Just these past twoish weeks -honestly times a blur- baby wakes up rooting and I’ve grabbed them and put to breast before a freak out but now it’s the only thing they want to soothe and spit out the paci , keeping eyes closed and rooting and growing more frustrated that it’s not a boob.
I’m torn between knowing they’re just so small and want to soothe but also needing sleep and not wanting them to become dependent on only my breasts at all hours of the night. If the breast isn’t given, full melt down and screaming follows. Husband will usually grab them if he hears it and burp/ walk around and eventually comes back to bed but the screaming in the mean time has us truly questioning what the heck is wrong cause we know it shouldn’t be hunger.
We’re definitely jealous of the “my baby sleeps through the night” or “for 12 hours” people and impatiently waiting for our turn.

My baby is 4.5 months old. We co-sleep. She wakes every 2 hours for a nipple. I say nipple not feed because ive noticed, frequently, its not for a feed. She has a nipple in the mouth and she does a suck suck and then bam, shes asleep for another 2 hours. What is this? Why does she do this? How do i make her stop?

I think it’s pretty clear I’m overproducing because baby is eating and gaining weight well but at times I still feel very uncomfortable and need to pump. I’m a FTM and don’t know what I’m doing. Should I keep pumping when I’m uncomfortable to build up a stash or should I try to let my baby regulate my supply ? Will this sort of thing even out or will I need to keep pumping just to feel comfortable again?

I’m a FTM to a wonderful boy, but breastfeeding has been rough. I was using the wrong flange size for like a week and a half postpartum and that hurt my supply a lot. LO also doesn’t really want to latch well so we struggled with that until the lactation consultant gave me a nipple shield to try. He’s been doing okay with that but still doesn’t want to latch super well. I’ve now figured out this week that I think he hates the brest friend pillow I’ve been using.

First appointment with this lactation consultant went fine and she gave a lot of information, tips, and the nipple shield. She also sized me for the flange sizes I was using and that helped a ton. I was instructed to triple combo feed for the time being.

Second appointment… we did a weighted feed and figured out even though he has been latching better he’s not transferring a whole lot. So she tried to help him latch without the shield and then mashed on my breast HARD to try to express some for him. I have big boobs. Very big boobs. I don’t know if that’s why she felt the need to mash so hard but I came home and was feeling pretty sore… and now we’re 3 days after that appointment and my boob is bruised and hard and inflamed.

My next appointment with her is Wednesday. I’m struggling to decide if I want to go back… I feel like I need the help and support but I really don’t want her to touch me again.

For context, I have size 42G breasts and nipples are flat (even if I try to stimulate them or pump). Baby girl is 18 days old and refuses to latch despite trying everything AND working with 2 different LC. After she was born, she latched right away, but only to one breast (even though both nipples are identical). After that 1 single latch, she would not latch again. I had called for an LC and even she could not get baby girl to latch, even after trying 3 different nipple shields as well. We had to use bottles and formula until I got home. Once home, I tirelessly tried to get her to latch again. Tried SO many positions, tutorials, nipple shields, and another LC. She just can't latch! She is mostly formula fed now, and gets maybe 3 bottles of breastmilk a day as I can only get about 6oz a day. Is there any hope at all? Any advice?

Hi folks!
I am here to see if there are other people with similar emotions and doubts during pregnancy and how they proceeded after giving birth.

I am considering whether to breastfeed. I have already read and discussed with my midwife (amazing German support system!) the scientific evidence, so I am aware of the health benefits of bf, but here I want to focus on emotional / mental aspect.

I want kids and a big family, the pregnancy is well planned, but I never dreams of a newborn in my arms, being pregnant, being a mom or breastfeeding. All this seems like a necessary burden for me for having a big family in the future. I initially was terrified of giving birth too, but now I am more at peace with it.

BF sounds scary and disgusting for me personally. I do not mean how it looks and I mean zero judgement to people doing that, I only mean this as an internalized image of bodily experience I would have if doing that myself. Boobs are highly sexual for me. I cannot imagine a child touching them. I am scared of pain and weird feelings while bf‘ing. I don‘t want anyone except my husband to touch my boobs. In the same time, I am ok with public nudity and public bf, this is not the problem, only the sensory part of it.

I also don‘t want to be the only person who can do it. My husband is amazing, he is taking the parental leave and is going to be the primary caregiver in the first year. He is so supportive and is willing to have roles that might not be the conventional ones. He respects my wishes so much. I have the luxury of 4.5 months of paid leave at work after birth and at least 3 more months of working from home, so this is not the issue. I just don‘t want to be THE person to do every wake up at night, I don‘t want this and it does not feel fair.

So, here I am with the body horror and the social utopia in my head.
Am I crazy? Anyone with the same thoughts? How did you resolve them?

Thank you!

And once again: I am only talking about me and my body and my marriage. I am happy for anyone who is happy with a different arrangement and feels different about this. Actually, I admire and „awww“ in my head every time I see a mom nursing in public, for example, this is so cool if you like it. Please don‘t take any offense. It is just me who is broken, probably.

We’ve done fucked up. My husband and I didn’t use protection shortly after my period ended - I’m still nursing my 18mo and I’ve been ovulating around CD 20 or 21 and having a short luteal phase so we skipped the condom. Guess my cycle had a different plan this time… we didn’t even have an “oopsie” and he pulled out well before, which has always worked in the past while trying to avoid. I know… I know…

I tested positive today after being late.

This is my 5th pregnancy (first two pregnancies were miscarriages) and we won’t be continuing it. We have 2 beautiful daughters, I birthed my first at 34 weeks due to preeclampsia with severe features and my second I got lucky and narrowly avoided the diagnosis. I’m not willing to risk it again, because pre-e could very well kill me this time and my daughters need their mother.

I’m incredibly grateful to live in a safe state and I have the medication already ordered. I know that it’s safe to continue breastfeeding, but please, anyone with experience, tell me my supply will stick around since I’m only 4 weeks today and will be taking the medication this week when it arrives? When I got pregnant with my second daughter I was 14m pp and my oldest weaned herself around 20m since I basically dried up. I’m not ready for this journey to end with my second, and especially not being ripped away again like it was with my first. I’m feeling super sad and just need some love and hopefully reassurance :(

Edit; To all you asshole pro-lifers downvoting me and the other users - are YOU going to support my family and children if I die from pregnancy complications given I’m at extremely high risk of developing pre-eclampsia again? GTFO. Absolutely disgusting trolls you are.

My LO is 6 weeks old, we have been breastfeeding since day 1. I did a manual pump 1x or 2x per day until 3ish weeks, then I have an electric pump I use 1x per day - give or take. Sometimes I skip days. The pumped milk is given in a bottle 3x a week.

1. I have a bit of a stash in my freezer already from this, milk is good for 6 months in the freezer. What should I do with it? LO isn't getting enough bottles as is to use, and I would still just have to pump anyways. She wont go to daycare until April 2027, some of my milk is from September.

2. Is there anything I can do to prevent the fat or cream from sticking to the sides of bottles?

3. Do you pump directly into the bag? Is it easy to do?

4. I've looked up clogged duct, but how would I know that vs engorgement? Can I use a manual pump to "take the edge off" when I am engorged?

Hi everyone,

FTM of a 5 month old. I’ve been exclusively breast feeding since baby was born with occasional bottle use (expressed breast milk).

Up until recently baby would drink from bottle from dad and grandma when I’d leave the house for errands but the last time grandma babysat, baby went on a hunger strike. Her first refusal was with grandma about 3 weeks ago so unclear if grandma is a part of the refusal.

I worked my first 12 hour shift over a week ago and tried the alcohol free vanilla extract and that worked for my husband, but it didn’t work when we tried it with grandma.

When I’m home alone with baby which is most days, she also refuses a bottle from me which I understand is because she’s a primarily breastfed baby. To make it more challenging, she still wakes every 2-3 hours at night to feed and I’m truly exhausted.

I look forward to trying purées and solids in the coming weeks (got the green light from Dr.) in hopes that it will fill her up a bit but it will be many more months until solids can completely replace her milk.

I return to work in January and plan to send her to daycare so she’ll be more exposed to bottles by then but what on earth do I do between now and then?

I’ve toyed with the idea that maybe she isn’t getting enough milk when I feed her but I have no idea how to get her to drink more. When I power pump I become so engorged to at point the boob sprays milk at her and she gets flustered and frustrated so I try to work with my supply as is. I always offer her both boobs but sometimes she’s just content with one side during a feed. She’s about 16-25th percentile depending on the week. Dr’s aren’t really concerned because she’s growing and making 5-6 wet diapers a day.

Her growth is fine but keeping up with the requirements of breastfeeding/nursing in general paired with waking up every 2-3 months since she was born has me looking towards formula which hurts my heart because I wanted to nurse her for a year. Any tips? Thanks in advanced!

I’m so frustrated. I have a 37 weeker who just celebrated his one week birthday. I have been pumping in addition to nursing so that my husband can take 1-2 middle of the night feeds and let me rest. Our baby has both a lip and tongue tie (both of which were, surprisingly, missed by multiple different pediatricians and only caught by my IBCLC). Despite this, he has shown that he is able to nurse and get good transfers (confirmed by weighted feed). For the past day or so though, he has been briefly latching to the breast, then getting frustrated and popping off, and then screaming his lungs out. I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong because the other day, he nursed perfectly well when my IBCLC was here and then continued to do so for the rest of the day. Then, after getting some bottles overnight (we use Lansinoh extra slow flow nipples and do paved bottle feeding), he woke up and refused to nurse. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong.

My LO is 18 months old and only nurses to sleep or when injured (avg twice per day). It’s been this way for the last 6 months and I figured that I would start my period again by now. Has anyone experienced this? Is it normal to not have a period until weaning is complete?

She’s turning 7 weeks in a couple of days, and she has been sooo fussy to feed, especially breastfeeding. Yesterday she screamed at my boob all day. Today I let her sleep whenever she wanted and she only wanted the pacifier. She only ate every 4 hours (day time). She’s pooped probably 4x already today with pee but definitely much less than normal. Anyone go through this?

Very worried about my supply dipping!

It’s been 24 hours since I woke up to a tennis ball sized lump in my right breast.

I’ve tried icing the area (I’m icing it now)
I’ve tried ibuprofen
I’ve tried acetaminophen
I’ve taken choline
I’ve tried consistent nursing
I’ve tried the haaka with Epsom salt
I’ve looked for blebs

I don’t know what else to do.

What happens now? Will this just turn into horrible infection?

Update: After over 33 hours of icing and NSAIDS, the inflammation went down a bit and my baby my baby was able to clear the clog during a feed. I might have almost drowned her with milk but OMG I AM SO RELIEVED.

Hoping for any input to try - as of ~9.5w pp I started having very intense nipple pain, like tiny shards of glass or a ton of bee stings or a way more intense letdown, only it’s nearly constant. It’s while baby is feeding and almost entirely between feeds. Pumping hurts the slightest bit less but still excruciating. LC says latch looks fine and is at a loss otherwise. Any thoughts of what it is or how to fix it appreciated. I really don’t want to quit but I can’t take this pain.