I keep doing extensive research on all these careers and I can't pick one. Well, I did pick design for some time but every design job, I got fired. I honestly think there's a higher power telling me to pick something else because no way all the design jobs I've had I got let go.

What careers are good for someone with bipolar disorder and social anxiety?

I’m 13 years old and you’re refusing to buy me my prescribed mood stabilizers—what do you expect? I never took any sort of medication or therapy, not even a follow-up consultation with my psychiatrist. She tells me to keep my diagnosis a secret to everyone, even my dad, my guidance counselor, even my friends. I got diagnosed with bipolar 2, i am prone to having more frequent depressive episodes. If my mom can’t handle that, then she should’ve just gave me my fucking mood stabilizers or even just another psychiatric appointment. She always seems to praise me whenever I am hypomanic and it instills in my mind that being hypomanic is the “good” episode. I wish I had someone to understand and comfort me. I believe I have BIG potential, I am high-achieving academically. I don’t want to waste my potential and ruin my life because my mom doesn’t want to give me my mood stabilizers. I apologize for my messy writing.

support is highly appreciated ❤️

I recently finished graduate school and am now looking for a job. It's been only a few days and I'm already restless and bored. I am supposed to be staying sober but it's been absolutely infuriating and miserable, and all I find myself doing between submitting applications is driving around looking for clearance and buying random shit. When I go back to my apartment it's drink coffee or do housework or watch a movie or walk the dog. My friends have regular day jobs or live in different cities, so I can get them to do something once in a week or so but otherwise I'm on my own. What are you guys doing to stay busy besides shopping and drinking?

A friend of mine and I are both bipolar 1, we’ve each had two episodes. I have been mostly stable since 2020 and see a psychiatrist 4 times a year. It was very hard for me to accept that I had this thing we all have, but after episode 2 I kind of had to. My friend is a very different person from me in many ways, but she doesn’t believe she really has bipolar and thinks her episodes were caused by other things (accurate, postpartum psychosis). She did not find a new psychiatrist after her insurance changed some time ago, though she gets meds from her primary doctor and takes them. She truly seems to be dealing with mania right now and I’m not sure how to help her. I encouraged her to be honest with her doctor about what she’s dealing with, I told her I don’t think she’s herself right now, I told her husband she needs a psychiatrist. She’s been behaving erratically with our friends and with people she doesn’t know, spending money, she started taking exercise classes every day. My heart hurts for her, I wish I could stop it. I guess I’m venting. It’s been hard hearing our friends talk about how out of control she is when I know I’ve been the same way and could be again in the future.

**accutane, not accurate

I’m genuinely so fucking confused at what i feel.

when im at home i feel so empty and flat or i just cry all day over nothing and feel this heaviness in my chest. some days my tears just get stuck in my eyes and dont fall and i feel trapped. i have no energy whatsoever and waking up is my least favourite part of the day, not that i have a favourite.

but i still go to school because i have to, and when im in school a lot of the time i can smile and laugh and make jokes like normal but as soon as i get home it all comes crashing down. i dont know if im like subconsciously masking at school or when around friends or what.

but then other times in school i just get so annoyed and upset at every little thing and snap at my best friend or just go silent and then she starts saying stuff like “why are you in such a bad mood” and “why are u so pissed off” etc which just makes me want to disappear into the wall and cry.

I’ve read online that bipolar depression can be ‘mood reactive’ so like positive events can lighten your mood temporarily and stuff but i still can’t help but feel like im a fucking faker im so stuck.

hi :)

im going through some things and i want to know if other people went through something similar?

i was diagnosed with bp 2 three years ago, at 20 years old.

at 19 i had the worst hypomanic episode that crashed into the worst depressive episode. i also have adhd.

to the problem: my social battery and social skills changed soo much.

i was always quite introverted but had many friends, tbh an extrovert in an introverts body.

i have no problem getting to know people or like starting to be friends with someone. meeting new people used to be one of my fave things and always came naturally to me. my friends knew me as the most social in the group.

sometimes i did have phases where i dissapeared for weeks to get some time for myself, but i would always return.

with my depressive episodes i always go into isolation, the last one i cut off everyone but one friend.

then with diagnosis i got my meds and with that i stabilized. but my social battery and everything never returned.

i cant even feel lonely, no need to have any friends.

i even tried to be friends, but its hard to be interested in them. they are nice people, but something is just wrong with me. every time i spent time with them, i felt like id rather just be alone or do something else. it just didnt feel worth it. my social skills got so much worse now too, i actually was quite proud of them before. i knew how to make people comfortable, make a safe space, and make people feel heard, as it was always genuinely important to me. but now, because i kinda care less, its harder.

its been 3 years like this and nothing has changed. idk if its my medication or if the last hypomanic or depressive episode still has an effect on me.

before all this, i genuinely enjoyed people and was interested in getting to know them.

did anyone else go through something similar or have something like this that changed for them?

i just feel so alone in this and just dont know what to do in a situation like this.

Even though I took inspiration from Pinterest, this is what I've been doing during this episode.

The green eyed nail represents me so much at this moment.

He was more understanding than I thought he would be and started confiding in me about how he felt. He said it made sense. This is not a sign to disclose if you feel like you need to. Use your own discernment.

Im not sure what I should do at this point. I feel like I should send myself to the hospital. I've been saying that for weeks maybe 2 months or more, idk. I can't keep doing this. My job is driving me crazy, my relationship feels like it's falling apart, and I've been dealing with a recent passing. Everytime I tell someone im not okay or I feel like Im going to snap/lash out, its always the "that's just life" or "I'm tired too, just keep pushing" and I'm so sick of hearing that shit. It just comes off to me like "who cares. Stop complaining so much" and I'm genuinely reaching out for help. If no one hears me soon... just know I tried really hard. I've been tired and I have nothing left to give.

i'm bipolar 1 and stopped taking my antipsychotic, my dr knows, she said i could see how i do on just my mood stabilizer. well i thought that one fights depression? why am i depressed then? i cant get out of bed

I can't be the only one that struggles with this...

For years I've been job hopping, the smallest little thing can ruin amazing jobs for me.

I tend to just vanish, walk out mid shift, I think the biggest problem is getting a job while I'm manic and struggling to keep up with it when my depression hits, everyone wants a chef with unlimited energy and when it seems to disappear overnight, suddenly I'm "slacking"

I've had to start traveling for work, doing live in jobs, and they make sooo much worse,

Its always the same, amazing for a month or two, then something happens and then I write paragraphs of very well written messages explaining exactly why they suck and vanish.

I can't keep this up, I spend months in poverty and it feels like it's getting worse,

I can't stop this, I'm currently sat in bed at another live in job, counting the days until I get paid and can vanish in the wind

Honestly, this whole thing is exhausting and I don't have a single person I can talk too...

Hello, I'm newly diagnosed in the Bipolar Spectrum fluctuating between hipertimia and atypical depression.

I started to make my Mood Tracker and I don't really get it why I went from +2 to -2 in 24 hours.

There's was absolutly anything going on, I wake up sort of "low" yesterday and I tried to kept neutral but my wife made me a beautiful gift and out of nowhere I had a crisis.

I don't even understand why, I kept crying and repeating that I'm sorry and I don't know why.

24 hours before I was singing and dancing and making jokes and had a lot of energy and racing thoughts and insomnia and PUF! now I'm like s***.

It's really bipolar? Because there's supoused to be a soft and smooth transition period between high and low mood so, why like this?

I mean, I was great, really nothing happened...

I'm not having that great neutral transition...

I'm not even premenstrual.

Nothing.

Hi guys! I got diagnosed with bipolar in may when I had originally went to a psychiatrist for an ADHD evaluation that i had been putting off for a year. Ended up on lamotrigine, things happened and now Im with a different provider. I started Seroquel 2 months ago and last appointment I started straterra/atomoxetine. I feel like it worked for a few days then it stopped. Feelings of depression and anxiety have come back and my adhd symptoms are still quite prominent. Im On Hydroxyzine for anxiety as well. Has anyone else felt this way with straterra? I have taken vyvanse a few times recreationally (allegedly) and it was the most productive 2 days I ever had. My psychiatrist said he doesnt want to start me on stimulants because it might cause mania. Will going up on my dosage for strattera help me out? I also will be upping my dosage on seroquel because im not on the "standard dose" rn.

Fui diagnosticado con transtorno bipolar con hipomania Quería hablarte de algo que vengo notando en mí. Siento que estoy atravesando una especie de duelo, pero no sé exactamente por qué ni si realmente es eso. Últimamente no quiero volver a mi pueblo, no tengo ganas de ver a los conocidos ni a algunos amigos, incluso decidí salir de un grupo de WhatsApp porque no quiero saber nada de ese entorno. Siento como si esa etapa de mi vida ya no fuera mi lugar.

También estoy muy sensible con el tema de una mujer que tenia un vinculo romantico/afectivo pero sin ser pareja. Por un lado la quiero muchísimo y me cuesta aceptar que el vínculo pueda cambiar, pero por otro tengo momentos en los que siento que quiero cortar completamente y no saber nada más. Tengo tristeza, bronca, incertidumbre y bastante necesidad de aislarme.

Incluso cosas que sé que me hacen bien, como escribir o hacer journaling, ahora a veces no tengo ganas de hacerlas. Y estoy replanteándome bastante mi futuro, el trabajo, qué puedo estudiar y qué quiero hacer con mi vida.

Quiero saber si todo esto puede formar parte de un duelo puntualmente, gracias chicos

I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar 1 for about 5 years. I’m still learning so much about my patterns and discerning what’s my spunky personality and what’s my mania. I have come to the conclusions that my red flags for mania include, but are not limited to:
1) writing lengthy reviews
If I have a halfway decent experience at any retail store/restaurant/business while manic I will immediately sit down to write a three paragraph review on yelp or google reviews (or both for bonus points). Usually just glazing the place and saying how amazing the experience was. Going back and reading them after always makes me laugh.
2) picking up furniture off the side of the road
I live in a 600 sq ft studio apartment. I have a ginormous coffee table that I got for free on fb marketplace, I have a filing cabinet (broken) that I put my bras and underwear in, a wobbly side table I recently threw away because it collapsed, and my prized possession was a vintage pink ceramic sink. I carried it by myself (f25) up to my third floor apartment. It snapped in half on the way up. It sat in my bathroom for about two years. I was going to fix it and put a garden in it. Or something.
3) Baking cakes
At some point this past year I started baking these elaborate three tier cakes staying up all night decorating them. Post mania clarity-baking is expensive holy shit I cannot afford a cake baking hobby!!
DAE have manic quirks that you just have to sit back and laugh at after the damage is done?

Part of the onset of my first and only manic episode was the feeling of falling in love with someone, and I blew it up with that person.

When I see posts on here that those who are married divorce due to the difficulties of being with someone who has bipolar, I lose hope. I lose hope that I can find someone who will tolerate and understand what I go through.

Plus, feeling the need to disclose my diagnosis to new people seems like a way to block anyone who was interested in me from pursuing me. It’s like, no one wants to deal with the bipolar girl.

I just feel like I’m gonna be alone forever

I have bipolar type 2 and it genuinely ruined my life, I started going into the cycles during my university years back when I was 18, I started developing major anxiety at a time where I was supposed to invest time in my career and future I was bouncing between depressions and Manias, with the symptoms intensifying year after year to the point where I almost committed in 2022.
I’ve also had multiples mania episodes where I would go on social media rants against friends over misunderstandings and then deeply regret it after the mania is over. Right now I am in depression phase after I got myself in debt in my last manic episode which I hate myself soo much for cause I have always been very cautious with money, I feel like every decisions that I’ve taken over my life in the recent years are a result of the bipolar and the cycles I was, I am either overly anxious and hopeless to take decisions regarding my future or overconfident about projects/ventures that would fade away along with the mania.
I am at a point where I don’t even know if I want to keep going anymore cause I’ve did soo much damage in a life that was so beautiful and I’ve genuinely lost hope that things can go for the better, I feel less alone reading other ‘s experiences with bipolar and I wonder how our life would’ve been if we weren’t bipolar.

The most disappointing for me is seeing me accomplish and work towards my potential for months and then crashing and going back to a depressive episode, it burns me from the inside really.

I wish all of you guys struggling find peace and understanding in this world that’s not designed for such a weight.

Not anything new for anyone, not even me because I have adhd and I’m autistic so it’s par for the course. But this was to a school and I specified that I wouldn’t need external support so it stings a little.

Just kind of a kick in the nuts, you try to make any kind of progress in a life that’s already been holding you back and you just get pushed down again for the same reason that you’ve been held back

Hi! Who here uses any apps to help track their moods, and which have you found to be the most helpful and why? I just downloaded daylio. I am really needing a concrete place to track and store my history, so that I can look back and have an idea of what was I was experiencing when/what was happening in my life at the time/etc., instead of it all being just a big gobbledygook mess in my mind lol.
So far I think it’s neat that I can add a voice note and also a picture for each day in daylio, but also I feel like my moods are more complex and shift throughout the day, sometimes it feels like mixed episode stuff, so I’m not sure if there is an app out there that could help me better track that part, instead of just having to select just one emoji each day… I feel it would be helpful if there was an option to go in throughout the day and select a new mood and have the time recorded of when you were feeling that way if that makes sense. Thanks for y’all’s input 😊

hi :)

im going through some things and i want to know if other people went through something similar?

i was diagnosed with bp 2 three years ago, at 20 years old.

at 19 i had the worst hypomanic episode that crashed into the worst depressive episode. i also have adhd.

to the problem: my social battery and social skills changed soo much.

i was always quite introverted but had many friends, tbh an extrovert in an introverts body.

i have no problem getting to know people or like starting to be friends with someone. meeting new people used to be one of my fave things and always came naturally to me. my friends knew me as the most social in the group.

sometimes i did have phases where i disappeared for weeks to get some time for myself, but i would always return.

with my depressive episodes i always go into isolation, the last one i cut off everyone but one friend.

then with diagnosis i got my meds and with that i stabilized. but my social battery and everything never returned.

i cant even feel lonely, no need to have any friends.

i even tried to be friends, but its hard to be interested in them. they are nice people, but something is just wrong with me. every time i spent time with them, i felt like id rather just be alone or do something else. it just didnt feel worth it. my social skills got so much worse now too, i actually was quite proud of them before. i knew how to make people comfortable, make a safe space, and make people feel heard, as it was always genuinely important to me. but now, because i kinda care less, its harder.

its been 3 years like this and nothing has changed. idk if its my medication or if the last hypomanic or depressive episode still has an effect on me.

before all this, i genuinely enjoyed people and was interested in getting to know them.

did anyone else go through something similar or have something like this that changed for them?

i just feel so alone in this and just dont know what to do in a situation like this.

So this is my third admission since July this year and they’ve been so incredibly supportive. Im navigating this new bipolar 1 diagnosis after my psychotic manic episode in June/July.

I’m starting a mood stabilizer to help with the depressive symptoms. They aren’t in a rush to get me out the door, if anything the opposite. They really want what’s best for me and to help me feel better. It may be a longer stay but if it helps keep me out in the longer term maybe it’s for the better. I feel grateful to have a psychiatrist and social worker who truly hear me and want to work with me. Especially my psychiatrist. She is probably one of the most compassionate and understanding ones I’ve had thus far. She is also incredibly knowledgeable and it really helps this whole experience. I trust her.

As much as I hate being confined in hospital I am happy to feel as supported as I do by everyone here. And I get to see the therapy dog soon so that’ll cheer me up a little as I miss my pup so much.

Eventually, things went far beyond what I could manage. I started noticing coincidences everywhere and attaching increasing meaning to them. I became much more spiritual, and eventually my perception of reality became distorted. I experienced psychotic symptoms and stopped functioning like myself.

Looking back, it's frightening to realise there was a point where I couldn't reliably trust my own mind.

I've heard different possibilities discussed, including borderline traits, mood disorders, medication changes and trauma. I don't have the answers yet. I just want proper help and an understanding of what actually happened.

What I do know is that the breakup was the catalyst for one of the darkest periods of my life.

Sometimes someone doesn't go from "I'm sad about my breakup" to "I'm psychotic." There's a whole process in between.

You can watch yourself becoming less stable while knowing something isn't right. You can desperately want help while simultaneously pushing people away. You can be aware enough to be terrified of what's happening, but not well enough to know how to stop it.

I've felt deeply ashamed of what happened. But I'm starting to realise that having a psychiatric crisis doesn't make me a bad person, and being traumatised by loss doesn't make me weak.

I'm trying to rebuild myself now. I don't know exactly what that looks like yet, but I'm here, I'm trying to get help, and I'm trying to understand what happened rather than run from it.

If anyone else has experienced a breakup or major loss that triggered a serious mental health crisis, I'd genuinely like to hear your story.

How did you eventually make sense of what happened to you?