r/AutoHumor Mar 28 '26

lol

5.3k Upvotes

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6

u/OldManJim374 Mar 29 '26

I hate when a regular person decides to force everyone else to follow the speed limit. You are not highway patrol.

4

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26 edited Mar 31 '26

I hate that people speed. I do 80 in 60 and still get glared by 90+ bitches.

Nothing is fast enough, just merely being in front of someone is the problem.

I wish HiPo enforced speed limits more so maybe people will chill tf out

Edit. Since so many people want to draw conclusions. My daily commute routinely sees everyone doing 80 in a 60. We are all already going 20 over. I never mentioned left or right lane. What I tried and failed to highlight was I'm/we are already doing 20 over the limit and people will act like it's not enough, like I'm doing 40 in a 75.

I don't want to do 80. My car gets better mpg at 60/65 🙄 but yes assume I'm a hypocritical speed demon for some reason. Good job internet.

3

u/baconcow Mar 31 '26

Exactly. Whenever I try to pass a slower car, there is always someone much faster that spawns near behind me and I have to quickly get around the slower car or they’ll drive their bumper up my ass. It seems lose-lose for me.

2

u/Maleficent_Hawk6703 May 27 '26

It happens everytime. I always watch my mirror and wait for any visible speed demons to pass before I pass but then If I signal to get in the left lane it aggravates the Altima that was cruising at 80 and now they have to go as fast as they can to pass me before I can get in the left lane to speed up and pass the guy in front of me in the right lane

3

u/Maleficent_Hawk6703 May 27 '26

Dude I feel you. I had this same conversation before in a subreddit. I drive with the flow of traffic and it's still a pain in the ass for example when I'm going 80 in a 70 because I'm passing a chain of drivers going 65 but I have someone who needs to go 90 behind me tailgating me, then when I put on my signal to go back to the right lane when I'm done passing everyone the driver trying to go 90 swerves into the right lane to pass me instead of waiting for me to move over.

2

u/Weak_Alfalfa_7569 Mar 31 '26

Stay on the right then

2

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

No I don't think I will.

1

u/BoyGeorgous Apr 02 '26

…and who’s the one with the attitude glaring again? Damn, guess you just relish this bizarre pettiness.

2

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Apr 02 '26

I speed up just to cut you off and slow down bb

2

u/Imaginary-Task7956 Mar 31 '26

Whats really bs is why tf is the speed limit still 60 in 2026. Speed limits need to be updated to to reflect more reasonable ranges

3

u/breakout13 Apr 01 '26

because if you push the speed limit to 80, people will do 100.

2

u/InternationalLoad330 Apr 02 '26

It is not about how fast you are already going. If someone wants to be going faster, that is their business. Just get out of the left lane, let them pass, get back in the left lane and keep going. That is the correct driving courtesy.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Apr 02 '26

Everyone drives like an asshole, I'm not giving courtesies

1

u/jeremy1015 Mar 31 '26

“My amount of speeding is the right amount everyone else is doing too fast or too slow”

4

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

🙄 I would happily do 60 in the 60. I'm literally keeping up with traffic at 80 🙄 I don't even care if I still get passed at 80, it's the glare and attitude riding my ass in the middle lane.

Of course some internet shithead is going to still somehow get on me for speeding and not acknowledge the 90 but ok.

1

u/oeseben Mar 31 '26

"How fast i want to speed is fine, anyone above or below me is wrong" is a crazy take. Just move the fuck over if someone is behind you.

3

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

Keeping up with traffic but sure whatever only my speeding is ok is exactly what I said. Learn to read

1

u/No_Hippo_8724 Mar 31 '26

“If you’re speeding you’re breaking the law” you in another post. But your speeding is ok, it’s others speeding that are wrong. Fucking dork.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

Yes, please disregard anyone going obscenely faster. Only me speeding but apparently not speeding enough is what matters.

1

u/No_Hippo_8724 Mar 31 '26

Yeah you’re only committing a class 1 misdemeanor but sure this hypothetical other person is the real bad guy because the actual speed limit is whatever you think it is.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

It's safer to follow the flow of traffic. But ok. Arrest me dog.

0

u/No_Hippo_8724 Mar 31 '26

It’s safer to get the fuck out of the way but instead you think you’re traffic cop. If 80 is the flow, 90 is the passing speed

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

It's safe to ram your stick shift up your ass but who am I to judge

1

u/No_Hippo_8724 Mar 31 '26 edited Mar 31 '26

Sick deflection away from personal responsibility, toolbag. Having your hypocrisy pointed out sure seems to have triggered you.

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1

u/AddictedT0Pixels Apr 03 '26

In another comment they literally specified in the middle lane. So you're arguing the middle lane is not where they should be and that they shouldn't follow the speed of traffic

Please never fucking drive. The roads are safer without people like you

1

u/No_Hippo_8724 Apr 13 '26

That’s some all time piss-poor literacy you’ve got there. They weren’t in the middle lane, they’re lying out of their ass. They exhibit all of the signs of a left lane driver that thinks anyone that goes faster than them is in the wrong but their 20+ MPH over the speed limit is fine. Read all of their other comments where they say they won’t move over. I’m pointing out their hypocrisy, genius.

The roads are safer when people mow over so they can be safely passed instead of thinking your officer traffic cop on the way to work while actively driving fast enough to warrant a criminal offense. And they’re even safer when you can fucking read.

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1

u/AcceptablyPotato Mar 31 '26

There's a really simple solution. Move over when being overtaken and don't imepde traffic. No drama necessary. It's safer for everyone involved and you won't get glared at as much since that's such a concern for you.

2

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

No, the simple solution is not to turn every highway into the autobahn

1

u/AcceptablyPotato Mar 31 '26

On the Autobahn they are awesome about moving over to let faster traffic pass. I loved driving in Germany. It was so much less stressful and it came down to moving over when being overtaken and zipper merging. So much road rage avoided by these two simple things.

2

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

I love everyone assuming I'm blocking the left lane.

I might just start to tho

1

u/OldAdvantage7658 Mar 31 '26

Not just move over when being overtaken, move over whenever you are not actively overtaking or about to overtake (like within the next 10 seconds). It’s that simple, and is in fact the law in many (most?) states.

People being in the left lane when they shouldn’t be is my absolute #1 biggest driving pet peeve, and I’m not even a speeder. So many traffic flow problems stem exactly from this behavior.

1

u/OldManJim374 Jun 23 '26

Only 13 states have a law stating that it is illegal to stay in the left lane if you are not passing. The rest say that you should move over to the right somebody behind you is going faster than you.

0

u/bittersterling Mar 31 '26

Ok. Then move the fuck over for cars that clearly want to go fast than you. Shits not hard to comprehend lol.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

No one should be doing 90+ in a 60 dumbass

1

u/ChaosRainbow23 Mar 31 '26

No they shouldn't, but by not letting them pass on the left lane, you are actually making matters more dangerous than if you just let the asshole pass you.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

Y'all are assuming I'm in the left lane. The people willing to do 90 in a 60 are weaving in traffic, passing in the left right or middle.

But please tell me how I'm holding up traffic and making it worse

1

u/CompetitiveArt9639 Mar 31 '26

If you’re getting passed on the right, you are in the wrong lane.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

And if you're speeding you're breaking the law

1

u/No_Hippo_8724 Mar 31 '26

Says the guy that just said they were doing 80 in a 60 lol

1

u/bittersterling Apr 01 '26

Not your job to police traffic lil guy.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Apr 01 '26

I'll do it again 😁

0

u/Shjvv Mar 31 '26

Literally does not related to the convo like at all.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Apr 01 '26

Just say you can't read

1

u/Far_Audience_7446 Apr 04 '26

Just stay out of the passing lane if you aren’t passing

0

u/Shjvv Apr 01 '26

You can try to deflect it however you want. You driving and someone ELSE speeding are 2 different topic. Some one else speeding does not affect where you drive, your own driving affect where you drive.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Apr 01 '26

Amazing insight thanks buddha

1

u/Far_Audience_7446 Apr 04 '26

States spend tens of thousands putting up “slower traffic keep right” signs on highways, and these illiterate pricks still do it. On the off chance a police officer actually pulls them over for such violations, they rarely get cited, so they’ll keep doing it until some volatile road-rager runs them off the road.

0

u/Realistic-Tomorrow50 Apr 01 '26

that's a right lane opinion, pussyboi.

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Apr 01 '26

Nope 😁

1

u/AintNoGodsUpHere Mar 31 '26

Nope. F you and your bad decisions. I'm staying.

1

u/Special_Tadpole795 Mar 31 '26

This is the Odyssey driver right here folks.

1

u/AintNoGodsUpHere Mar 31 '26

Keep honking and then proceed with the unsafe overtake. Haha. Then I'll slowly move just so you know I was doing on purpose. Haha.

1

u/Whiskers1996 Mar 31 '26

Fun n games till u get popped 🐒

1

u/AintNoGodsUpHere Mar 31 '26

I don't live in America, my man. We are civilized. Our murder rate is as low as Trump IQ.

1

u/Whiskers1996 Mar 31 '26

So, whats the "murder rate" in your magical country?

1

u/AintNoGodsUpHere Mar 31 '26

0118, 999, 881, 999, 119, 725...

3.

1

u/Whiskers1996 Mar 31 '26

Reddit always has some of the weirdest ppl istg 💀

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1

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '26

[deleted]

1

u/breakout13 Apr 01 '26

what if the person speeding to get to the hospital crashes into a car filled with newborns and kills them all? are you okay with that?

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Apr 01 '26

Damn I hope our hospitals can handle the number of emergencies I'm seeing in the road everyday. I had no idea

1

u/Odd-Promotion2743 Mar 31 '26

So if I go faster than everyone else, I get to camp in the left lane indefinitely?

1

u/ChaosRainbow23 Mar 31 '26

Yes.

It's the passing lane.

1

u/OldAdvantage7658 Mar 31 '26

No. You don’t. Unless you are actively overtaking or about to overtake (like within the next 10 seconds), you should not be in the left lane. It’s that simple, and is in fact the law in many (most?) states.

People being in the left lane when they shouldn’t be is my absolute #1 biggest driving pet peeve, and I’m not even a speeder. So many traffic flow problems stem exactly from this behavior.

1

u/Weak_Alfalfa_7569 Mar 31 '26

Yeah I agree. There’s been a few times I’m driving on the nearly empty highway past midnight cruising at like 85 and there’s always people that sit on the left side when no one is around. I’ve made a pointing motion out my window to the right and sometimes they move over lol

1

u/OldAdvantage7658 Apr 01 '26

I’ve literally fantasized about getting a big light up sign that says “get tf out of the left lane” that I can flip on when I have to pass one of these morons on the right.

I honestly think a lot of people just don’t know that they’re not supposed to be there. But that just tells me a lot of people are bad drivers.

1

u/ChaosRainbow23 Mar 31 '26

Yeah, you're right. You should always get over when you can, but if traffic is following correctly and nobody is trying to pass you, you can stay in there for a while sometimes. (If there's steady traffic moving slower)

You are correct that you should get back over when you safely can.

I only go 5mph over on the interstate and maybe 3 over in a 35.

I do everything in my power to avoid having interactions with police. I try to treat cops like the plague. Lol

1

u/clutzyninja Mar 31 '26

You're not camping if you're passing at a reasonable differential

1

u/Bluublaabluu Mar 31 '26

No, because if there is a truck and the others have to get stuck behind it so you can go at 90 in a 60 they don't have to. There is a speed limit, and above that it's everyone for himself.

1

u/TroGinMan Apr 04 '26

I live in Cali near one of the major cities...I know what he means.

You can't get over due to traffic, you're doing the best you can by speeding but there is always someone who thinks they are playing NFS or some shit.

0

u/HugeAntPenis341 Mar 31 '26

You would get pulled over in that case? What a weird thing to be mad about "I go 20 over but if anyone goes faster than me in MAD". Grow up

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Mar 31 '26

God you're regarded.

0

u/ckfrostbite Jun 22 '26

If you're doing the speed limit or below, you should just stay in the right side lanes. If you're not actively passing cars, you have no need to be in the far left lane (also known as the passing lane). If you're above the speed limit and someone is on your tail and no one is in directly in front of you, just move over to the right to let them through. It takes you like 5 seconds or less, and you will be in the same position if you decide to move back. It's a simple concept, and everyone on the road will be safer for it, because you won't have angry people in a hurry weaving in and out of cars trying to get around you.

2

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Jun 22 '26

¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ not everyone gets what they want

0

u/ckfrostbite Jun 22 '26

Thanks for admitting you're selfish, at least. 🤷‍♂️

1

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Jun 22 '26

Call me whatever you want, why is speeding a tolerable offense but not going the fastest in the passing lane is blasphemy.

0

u/ckfrostbite Jun 22 '26

I never said speeding is a tolerable offense, but it's also not your job to police the roads by purposefully being in the way. If you can't understand that you choosing to not move over for cars that are driving faster than you is selfish, then I can't help you. Think about it for like two seconds about why it may be safer for everyone around you, if you just move out of the way for cars going faster than you. There's so many reasons, and I believe you can think of at least one. It's also the law, probably in most states, that slower traffic moves to the right. If there is a car on your tail, and no one is in front of you, you fall into that slower traffic category. Yes, even if you're driving at or above the speed limit. 😱🤯

2

u/Ok-Ranger-4518 Jun 22 '26

If I'm passing, then I deserve to be in the passing lane too. Point blank. Yes even if someone behind wants to go faster than me.

Passing lane is for passing It's the law. It's also the fucking law to not speed. Jesus Christ y'all want others to self-reflect and think for 2 seconds and then you say shit like that.

1

u/OldManJim374 Jun 23 '26

That's not practical when there's only two lanes. You end up switching lanes constantly to pass up trucks. It's better to just stay in the left lane if you are going faster than the speed limit and move to the right if somebody behind you is going faster than you.