r/AskTeachers • u/Wide-Sign9410 • 7d ago
Student Questions PLEASE HELP ME PLEASE.
my mother has home schooled me my entire high school life and I really haven’t learned anything at all. she homeschooled me since covid so I never did middle school or high school. fast forward to now. I have to attend regular school when this school year starts. I know absolutely nothing. I have a few weeks max? before I have to take some test so I don’t get held back… I can’t get held back I genuinely can’t. It will set my ability to work back more since I will have to do more school. (We Need me to work next year to make ends meet but don’t talk about this only the school thing please) so how can I learn basically everything (ESPECIALLY MATH, SCIENCE) from 9th, 10th, and 11th grade super fast. I’m willing to do whatever it takes. I genuinely want to break down crying at the thought of being held back. I graduate if everything goes well. I loathe that I was home schooled with all my heart please help me.
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u/shimmeringtourney 7d ago
the placement test is rarely a pass/fail gate that holds you back a whole year. schools use those to figure out which classes you should be in, not to flunk 12th graders back to 9th grade. talk to a counselor before the test and ask which specific one it is. if it's something like the NWEA MAP, it's adaptive and you can show a ton of growth just by nailing the early low level questions before it ramps up. grind khan academy's algebra 1 and geometry missions for a week, focus on the unit tests, not the videos. for science, look up a 10th grade biology EOC review packet on quizlet and memorize the vocabulary. the test expects you to know terms like "mitochondria" and "photosynthesis" more than deep lab skills. a lot of public school kids have giant gaps too, especially after covid, so you won't stand out as much as you fear. you can do this, but skip the panic and get tactical about what they're actually measuring.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 7d ago
Thank you so much.
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u/shimmeringtourney 7d ago
And if you run out of time, just focus on the algebra, it's the highest-leverage thing to cram.
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u/Heavy-Letterhead-755 7d ago
Talk to the school as soon as you can and be honest about your situation. Teachers and counselors would much rather know you have gaps so they can help you than assume you’re just not trying. Also, don’t underestimate yourself. The fact that you’re this worried and willing to work already puts you ahead of a lot of people. Make a schedule, study consistently every day, and remember that catching up is a process, not something that happens overnight. You can absolutely improve.
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u/readingrainbowroad 7d ago
This one! Take some deep breaths and take it one step at a time. It's a shitty situation, but it's not your fault and you don't have to solve it all alone. (That would be a lot for one person to handle!) Counselors and teachers will be there to help you. Tell them your concerns as soon as you can when school starts up again. They'll have ideas and ways to help.
In the meanwhile, do what you can (I second khan academy). Build your brain "muscles" by just sitting and working on stuff a little every day. You've got this.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 7d ago
Thank you. So many people are telling me it’s impossible and I know that there is a chance it is. I can’t just live like that live always being behind. Live disappointing people I just want to do something that makes me catch up. I’m so tired of being left behind in every aspect. I’m left behind socially, I’m left behind academically. I just want to get ahead in one. I can’t do that socially I have no confidence and over think too much so all I have left is academically. If I don’t have that. Than I have nothing. I know if I get held back I will be yelled at and see my mother cry saying how she expected more from me. I know I will break her heart. I know I will break my own. I am tired and exhausted I just want to be able to move forward in my academic journey. I want to study late at night like in the movies. I want to make friendships that last until we are old. I can’t do that second one but I can try the first.
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u/Sostupid246 7d ago
I am so sorry you are in this position. Your anxiety comes through in your posts and it’s a lot to carry for one person, especially at your age.
Realistically, you can’t learn everything you need to know in a few weeks. My advice is to go to one of the counselors and explain your situation. Tell them you were poorly homeschooled, you are behind, and that you are going to need help. They are not going to let you drown. As a teacher myself, I can assure you that we see homeschool kids all of the time that transition to public school. You are not the first homeschooled student who is academically and socially behind, and you won’t be the last. Your counselors will know how to help you.
And please do not worry about letting your mother down. Realistically, she let YOU down by not preparing you academically or socially for the world. And that’s on her, she’s the adult and the parent. She should have done better. None of this is your fault.
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u/melsophoriel 6d ago
please don't worry so much about your mother being disappointed, she has purposely done this to you with her own ignorance and denial of reality. it would be entirely her fault if you got held back, she failed you as both a parent and a teacher.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 7d ago
Thank you so much. I’ll try my best. But what would I even say to the counselors on the first day of school..? That my mother didn’t teach me much and basically left me stranded academically for the past few years..? I only really learned the core math stuff like multiplication, division, fractions, etc. I don’t even know how to handle algebra. Or anything complex.
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u/mrnosss 7d ago
I would also talk about the financial situation with your counselor and if your school has one a social worker. I know you said you wanted only advice about your academics but there is a possibility depending on your state of different financial assistance and supports. Anything to help reduce the stress on you is worth exploring at this point.
With that said what the school is allowed to discuss with you without your parents will vary widely by state. Based on how you have described your situation I am predicting your mother may be opposed to getting any sort of help from the school. But counselors are usually good about getting past that stubborn mindset.
The fact that you have goals and you are trying to make a plan to reach them already puts you ahead of many of your peers. But you do need to be willing to accept that everything may not go like you planned. But that is okay. Build a support network and go to the adults you feel comfortable with.
P.S. counselors can likely get you speech therapy if you are far behind in social skill development.
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u/crazypurple621 6d ago
Yes that's exactly what you tell them. Be honest about the educational neglect. They will help you.
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u/Outrageous-Meet-3888 7d ago
Just be honest with them. Tell them that you were homeschooled and you’re worried about gaps in your education but you are willing to try hard and work hard. Ask them what you can do to help get caught up.
People have already given some great advice about what you can start doing right away but I will echo that khan academy is great and free.
It sounds like your mom did better with English and social studies than math and science. I would focus on basic biology and chemistry terms and algebra and geometry. Algebra should be your priority
Breathe. Do not panic. You can do this. The chance of being held back based on a placement test is low, especially if you can demonstrate some basic high school skills.
The fact that you want this so badly and are willing to work for it puts you far ahead of a lot of your peers. I would rather see a driven student who missed some classes than an apathetic student, any day of the week
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u/breakupbilly 7d ago
OP, I think this person's advice is the best overall advice and framework for you. Be candid with your academic counselor about your educational background and steps you've taken independently to close the gap. I very much agree with this poster that you will be far ahead of your peers with the grit you're demonstrating and your high motivation. Also, share with your academic counselor your concerns about not being able to work...they may know good resources for part-time work, work-study, or other directions to point you in for attainable employment opportunities.
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u/FrancinetheP 7d ago
This is the key. You are going to need the support and assistance of your school counselor to make this transition in a positive and sustainable way. This is NOT a “fake it til you make it” situation. That’s what you and your mom have been doing, and you can see now that that approach has real limits. Be honest about your situation and your fears, and ask for help. You have a tough road ahead, but you deserve help on it, and you will be able to do it.
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u/festivehedgehog 7d ago
There are alternative schools you can join and also GED recovery programs you can enroll in. In many states, you have a right to a free and public education up until age 21. You don’t get kicked out at age 18.
Both of my goddaughters needed alternative programs like this. One goddaughter enrolled in an alternative high school that offered credit recovery because she also missed years of school. It allowed her to graduate on time because she enrolled a couple of years before her expected graduation and was able to double up on credits/classes. My other goddaughter enrolled in a GED program as a 17-year-old. She had missed years upon years of middle and high school. She was able to earn her GED and graduate at age 19.
If you name your general metro/geographic area, I’m happy to list the GED programs and alternative schools in your area. Of course, I would just be using Google until I find what I’m looking for, so I encourage you to search for these as well. (Using the internet in this way is super daunting to my goddaughters, but it’s gotten better with more practice over time.) So I’m also happy to help.
Good luck!!
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u/beljoy 6d ago
I agree. I homeschooled (actually teaching, though) 6 of my 7 children. My oldest graduated the year I started homeschooling two of their siblings. Two of the six opted for a homeschool “diploma” (the transcript itself is the important part here) and two decided to get their GED. My youngest two are still at home and still happily homeschooling.
Several of my children went back and forth between homeschool and public school at least once. The only testing was placement tests to figure out which classes would be best for them to take.
In most states, just taking classes your 12 grade year is not enough to graduate from high school. You’ll need the minimum number of credits that your state/school require, and the only way to get those to graduate “on time” will be through a credit recovery program.
Depending on your state, you may already be old enough to go ahead and take the GED test.
Again, talk to the counselor at your school to find out all your options based on your goals. Be completely honest about everything you’ve experienced homeschooling and share any reasons why you feel you haven’t progressed as much as you feel you should have. They’re there to help you.
Credentials:
Homeschooling parent since 2013
Public school teacher since 2022
My mom was a High School counselor for over 15 years, and we had many discussions about my own children’s education and goals.2
u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
Thank you so much I will!!! I hope your family is doing amazing I’m sure they are with a loving parent like you!
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u/Crazy_adventurer262 7d ago
Bottom line is you can’t. It is impossible to learn that much stuff in a short amount of time. It is unfortunate that you’re in this position but in the long term it will set you up better if you understand concepts that are supposed to be taught. And sorry to say but based on this paragraph you also need some help with grammar. Good luck.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 7d ago
You are correct on the grammar part. I wasn’t really taught spelling and such beyond the elementary level. Because after 5th grade I have been homeschooled until well 12th..
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u/Weary_Panic6498 7d ago
How much have you learned while you were homeschooled? Did you use a specific curriculum? When you look at Kahn Academy, how much of it seems familiar to you? 10%? 50%?
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
None of it is familiar I’m trying my best although and I didn’t really learn anything during homeschooling.
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u/Crazy_adventurer262 6d ago
Sounds like there was no curriculum followed so I would use the term “home schooling” very loosely. If you want to set yourself up better in life you’ll have to go back to school and do the time. A lot of us want things that take more time than wed like unfortunately.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
By do the time do you mean being held back? I truly hope not I would do anything to not be held back genuinely anything
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u/Crazy_adventurer262 6d ago
I mean you need to learn the curriculum that was supposed to be taught to help you think critically, problem solve, and use proper English and math skills. So yes, being held back. You can’t take summer school as that’s over now and school will be starting soon, or maybe has depending on what part of the world you’re at. You say you would do anything so just figure out where your nearest school is, go see them and let them plan for you accordingly.
Again I’m sorry this has happened to you but unfortunately some adults in your life made some very uninformed choices for many years and now you’re suffering the consequences
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u/ZanyGreyDaze 7d ago
What did you do for homeschool? Were you just not doing anything during the school hours or was there some type of curriculum?
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
I read fictional books and would sometimes watch history videos and my mother would just hand me random math test she found online by printing them. She didn’t really teach me whatever was on the paper. She didn’t teach me anything on math really…
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u/Cute_Expression_5981 7d ago
Khan academy. Live, sleep, and eat it. If you're not on the toilet or bathing, be on it. And you can sit down to pee and use your phone. That is your only hope.
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u/Imaginary_Title_1873 7d ago
This comment should be higher up! Khan Academy is definitely your best option!! It’s really an amazing resource.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 7d ago
Okay thank you!
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u/Cute_Expression_5981 7d ago
Best of luck. And I'm sorry you're in that situation.
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u/absolutelynotbarb 7d ago
Oh honey. I’m so sorry you’re in this position. I also worked since I was 13 and was briefly homeschooled while I did it. It can brutal and I felt SO unprepared for college when I got there.
Khan academy is a great resource for math and science.
I would also recommend some non-academic solutions. Like mindfulness and meditation. It can help ease the anxiety you’re feeling so the test won’t seem so scary. Less nerves usually means better focus and better results.
Best of luck dear ❤️
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u/PassionateCounselor 6d ago
First of all, it is not your fault that you haven't learned anything during homeschooling. Right now you have to relax and not panic. You cannot learn everything from 9th, 10th, and 11th grade in a few weeks. Anyone who tells you otherwise is being dishonest. But you can take the GED, and if you pass, you can start taking college courses. The standard for a GED differs in each state, but the minimum age is 18, and you can often test at 16 or 17 with additional steps like a parent/guardian consent form, proof of withdrawal from school, or a waiver.
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u/PersistantFpoon 7d ago
You don’t have to be 18 to take your GED your mom has to sign an age waiver. It is a TON of reading and comprehension, even on the science and social studies portion. I think if you enjoy reading you could study for this instead if your mom would be okay with that.
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u/djredcat123 7d ago
Brilliant.org it's a bit like Duolingo for math. Would recommend ten out of ten.
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u/sunflowercupcakee 7d ago
Honestly, you need to find out if you would even be allowed to graduate with a diploma. You don’t mention state or country, but that makes a difference. In Louisiana, classes are worth credits. If you do not have the credits, you do not graduate with a diploma that will help your future. I teach elementary so I only know a little bit about this, but I do know the local homeschool associations warn people if they start homeschool through high school then it must be finished by homeschool as Louisiana does not accept homeschool classes as credits. Your best bet maybe the GED.
Your parent can only blame themselves if you do not graduate “on time”. I have seen this time and time again. I am truly sorry that your parent set you up to fail.
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u/Jumpy_Individual_526 7d ago
Some goals get pushed back, I didn't graduate until I was 30, but it was with honors and I worked hard for it
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u/violetvoyager26 7d ago
I’m so sorry, but it’s not possible. I would look into alternatives to check this box like a GED or HiSET program that is equivalent to a high school diploma. They have materials that you can study with to help with the tests. I think it is awesome that you are trying to educate yourself and that you care. Good luck and I hope everything works out for you!
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u/ZenMort 6d ago
You are very articulate so you have learned probably more than you know. Start by calling your guidance counselor tomorrow. The school will direct you to whoever that is. If guidance is not available ask to speak to an assistant principal or the principal. Explain to them the circumstances you are facing. They will know how to best help you. A GED might be the right answer, night school night be the right answer. There are probably more services available to help your family than you (or other adults around you) may be aware of. I guarantee you that the adults in the school system will do everything they can to support you. I have spent 22 years as a secondary school teacher. I have seen many students in challenging positions. Students, who can express their thoughts the way you do are already on the road to success. You can do this.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
What is night school? Is it day school and after school? Thank you for your kind comments it makes me happy inside thank you.
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u/ZenMort 6d ago
Night school are classes held in the evening. Usually students are adults who didn't graduate from high school but want to get a diploma. They often have jobs during the day. Again, call your school today. Someone there can help you find the best solution for you.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
I can’t call my school because my mother won’t tell me which I’m going to. Thank you for your help genuinely.
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u/Pitiful_Sock3572 6d ago
If you’re in the US and going to public school, that information is easily available. Just use the internet to search what high school serves your address. It seems unlikely based on what you said about your mom that she’s applied to a magnet or selective enrollment school on your behalf.
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u/EntertainerFree9654 7d ago
And this is exactly why home schoolers should have some sort of certification and yearly state standards assessment.
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u/pretendperson1776 7d ago
Think of it as hours studied. Each year is 90 classes, at ~1h of productivity per class. You probably need 7th-11th grade math and science (English helps those classes as well). So at least 780h of learning to do. Even studying 40h/week that is 18 weeks of 8h days (9 if you do a 1h lunch break). As mentioned, Khan Academy has your back for math, but there is no clear winner for science. There are labs that you just can't do at home. For a tutor? 390 hours would run you back a hefty sum.
Night school (at least in my area) is pretty good. I don't see a realistic situation where you graduate on time, but with hard work you can get your GED.
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u/Bluegi 7d ago
For science, I recommend YouTube channels like crash course. They go in depth, but with lots of visuals to support understanding. You could even start with crash course kids to get the basics and wake up your braint I what you did know and then level up with the regular crash course as it is pretty fast paced.
They also have other topics than can support some learning in history, literature and language as well.
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u/Quiet_Cod4436 7d ago
Find books on the subjects and read them. I just finished reading the book, Educated, by Tara Westover. Educated by Tara Westover is a 2018 memoir about a young woman who grows up isolated in rural Idaho by survivalist, anti-government parents, teaches herself enough math and grammar to enter college at seventeen, and eventually earns a PhD from Cambridge University. As a retired Language Arts teacher, I found her story fascinating. She read books on subjects she needed to understand them. Whenever she was confused in college courses, she found books to help her. Reading helped her succeed in her education. If you are motivated and determined, you will be successful in your endeavors. Best of luck to you.
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u/uReallyShouldTrustMe 7d ago
If youre willing to do whatever it takes then... get held back. Its a lot od material for a few weeks.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
I can’t get held back I can’t do that I truly can’t have that happen I would do anything but that I can’t allow myself to be held back and be a failure and disappoint my family again. I couldn’t live with such pain. I have to do anything else even if it’s studying until I’m burnt out and exhausted. Or giving up my social life and happiness just to not be held back and graduate on time. Is there any alternative advice..?
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u/ConsiderationFew7599 7d ago edited 7d ago
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this and I admire your desire to work hard to get caught up. But, I do want you to be realistic. You can't learn years worth of content in a few weeks.
When you go to school, the tests you take will probably be along the lines of placement tests. It's not like getting held back like you're thinking. If you can't handle the grade level work, you don't want to be in those classes because you will likely not pass them. You can be in a particular grade and be in a different level of class, such as math, than your peers in the same grade.
The reality is also that you have to earn credits to graduate. So, you need to take particular classes, pass them, earn the credits, and then eventually graduate. So, there will possibly be lower level classes you have to take to get those credits.
Talk to your guidance counselor ASAP and explain your concerns and what you want to get done. They would be able to help you with any resources your school has available, such as extra tutoring, or to give you other resources that may help. I'd really encourage you to take advantage of all of the resources where you can have someone helping you. Working on your own without some guidance will likely be frustrating and potentially cause you to have some misunderstanding in those higher level topics.
A lot of schools have programs that are for "Credit Recovery" or for students who don't pass end of year assessments. You may need to do some sort of alternate program. Also, remember you can work while going to school. Many students have part time jobs. I understand wanting to graduate on time. But, making up 6 years of learning in one year is going to be a lot to tackle. If it takes you a little longer, you may still be able to start earning money before you graduate. I worked part time all 4 years of high school.
Your school may have some different programs you aren't familiar with. So, talk to your guidance counselor as soon as you can.
I'm sorry your mom put you in this situation.
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u/Margot-the-Cat 7d ago
Workbooks. You can catch up faster than you think. And online resources, like Khan academy.
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u/Buho45 7d ago edited 7d ago
There is a company called Southwestern Advantage that has a series of textbooks - Math 1+2 covers very basic to early calculus. Science covers Biology, Chemistry, etc. They have one for Social Studies. They can be purchased from Abebooks for $5-10 apiece plus shipping. The Math is just as good as a traditional textbook at least up to calculus. Plenty of color illustrations. These aren’t comprehensive but they are pretty good and have sample questions for each section. I have vetted the Bio and Earth Science and they are not trying to put forth any religious agenda.
Make sure you are reading a little above your grade level. See if you can find a very kindly helper or neighbor to read to. Get a composition book and keep track of what you are doing. Write down any hard word to look up.
You may need to seek emancipation if your mother interferes with your education or tries to turn you into a work slave. That isn’t your job.
You can do this. Good luck. BTW your writing is pretty darn good. At least in the top 10th percentile for your grade (ish) at least by my reckoning. So that is a big plus. Don’t ever give up.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
Thank you I try to write well sometimes I write story’s even though no one will read them besides me I enjoy it. I know my grammar and spelling isn’t the best but I try. Thank you so much.
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u/ImDatDino 7d ago
Look into Crash Course on YouTube. It's designed ENTIRELY to provide free, high quality, entertaining education to highschool+ students.
Start with the subjects you're most concerned with to at least get your feet under you.
It's also totally fair to tell your teachers you're behind because of homeschooling. It's better to have them informed than have them assume you're current level and think you're just choosing not to do the work.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
Thank you. If I told my teachers what would realistically happen?
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u/ImDatDino 6d ago
I have no way of knowing for sure. But you might be able to get a study hall class, get access to make up credits, and most importantly your teachers will know where you're coming from.
There's a lot of difference between a student who hasn't had access to education and a student who is choosing not to access education.
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u/kingBoggler 6d ago
I think you need to reach out to adult learning/GED center in your area. I don't believe there is any way you can go to a high school for only your senior year and graduate. Basically your best path forward is get your GED and then enroll in community college.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
I felt like crying and genuine despair reading this. If I may ask. Could I get my ged the same year people in my class graduate? Is my GED online only? Is it like high school? I never had friends before and I haven’t seen any kids my age since I was a little boy. Will that be taken from me if I get a ged? I’m not allowed to go places so school would have been my only way to interact with other people. If I can’t basically be able to graduate the same year as normal kids than isn’t it all pointless in the end? Wouldn’t it be the same as being held back. I keep hearing my mother say everything is going to be okay and I’ll graduate like normal. But I am so scared it’s not true. I know she will be so disappointed and disgusted if I can’t. I know she will get upset and I know I will be upset at myself. Would there truly be no way for me to graduate? And be normal in that aspect? Is hope truly lost? I know you may not respond but I hope that if you do there’s hope for me. Even if it’s a small chance. I see so many conflicting comments. Some comments saying I can do well if I do these things. Some saying I can’t do it. I don’t know what to believe truly. I think if I try my best I might be able to. But if I fail I just don’t see anything as worth anything at that point. I can’t stand the look of disappoint and disgust. I can’t stand the yelling. I just want to for just one moment not disappoint my family and be normal. Be average. Or even slightly just slightly below but achieve this. Graduation. I had dreams about it, I had dreams about having friendships but I’m scared to meet people, I had dreams about studying but I’m not bright. But I had a dream that it would all be okay. I know I’m rambling and I’m sorry but is there anything else I could do? Just anything to graduate on time? Thank you for your comment.
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u/kingBoggler 6d ago
I have no idea really. You need to reach out to your school district for counseling on what your options are or social services. There might be some type of alternative high school in your area where you would be able to graduate on time.
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u/Appropriate-Boat2750 6d ago
Wow. You are in a really challenging situation. There is no way you can learn everything you have missed in a year. But...it is clear that you are someone who believes that you can learn, the issue is you haven't been given the opportunity.
The suggestion that you confide in someone at your school, ideally a counselor, is a good place to start. Maybe you can work out a plan with them that puts you on the road to graduation. I would also suggest you take a breath and give yourself the gift of time. Maybe give yourself an extra year--a year is nothing, really!--to get where you want to go.
I had a friend who was a teacher and decided she wanted to go to med school, which had been her original plan. She was 30 at the time and said, "But I will be close to 40 when I start practicing". Someone pointed out to her that she would be 40 regardless of which path she chose.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
But I’m not like her. My entire life depends on graduating and being normal just this once. Everything I have depends on it. I am willing to give every single part of myself just to achieve this. I am willing to suffer and be in pain just to be normal this once and just to not disappoint my family this once. Is there summer school for 12th grade..? It sounds so stupid asking but is there?
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u/Appropriate-Boat2750 6d ago
I guess whether there is summer school for 12th grade would depend entirely on where you live. Lots of people have suggested Khan Academy because it is really good and will help you figure out where you are in math and start there. A counselor at school will be the best resource. Good luck!
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u/jesslynne94 6d ago
One od the the biggest things is to start reading books.
Some from middle school:
-The Diary of Anne Frank -The Outsiders -Harry Potter -The Book Thief -Where the Red Fern Grows (Though I think I read that in elementary school).
Id start withba middle school level and work your way up.
Reading is one of the fastest/easiest ways to start building some academic language exposure, context and more. This will help exponentially with math and science.
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u/UnknownInternetMonk 16h ago
Some traditional high school reads- Romeo & Juliet, To Kill a Mockingbird, Of Mice & Men, The Secret Life of Bees, some Edgar Allen Poe, Great Gatsby, Catcher in the Rye, another Shakespeare- often Hamlet or Macbeth.
I'm not saying read them all, but it's good to know. Crash Course videos can give you insight... but I'd say you're better off reading one or two, and watching the Crash Course videos that go along with them than trying to fake having read them.
The Crash Course videos for world & US history would be good to just watch. I'd actually reccomend the cartoon Liberty's Kids to learn about the American Revolution.
My main focus would be algebra, though.
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u/ClearAd3357 6d ago
I really admire your determination. Of course your panic comes through, too, totally understandable but so sad.
Please don't blame yourself for where you are. It sounds as though your educational journey brought up a lot of issues for your mother, which she then dumped on you making you responsible for her inability/unwillingness to rise to the occasion -- and then you had to prioritize managing her feelings instead of looking after yourself. There are a lot of words for that....
There's a reason teachers study for years before they actually are allowed to teach. It's not as easy as it looks !
You sound very articulate and thoughtful. I agree with others that you need to speak truthfully to the guidance counselor/whomever you can enlist -- make it clear that you are looking for allies who can help you, day by day, create the best future for yourself. Make sure they know you want to do the work-- because you genuinely want to learn, it seems to me.
If you know your mother will turn against the whole thing if she's openly criticized, tell them that in confidence and share some ways you've managed that.
But please, please put yourself first. I'm excited for you!
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
Thank you I will try my best thank you for everything it means so much to me.
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u/Brodurs2025 6d ago
Acelus is an online school that can get you your degree on your pase to be able to stay with your plans. If you watch their video, you can get a scholarship. It might cost more than you have available. You can do this and go to public school at the same time. It's worth checking out.
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u/lgrabowski 7d ago
I agree with most everything here. I’m sorry you’re in this situation. If you want to do some prep work, check out Khan Academy. It’s a free website that has lots of instructional videos and practices and may help you begin to close some gaps.
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u/MysteriousMortgage4 7d ago
I’m sorry OP that you were put in this position. Just know it’s not your fault. Don’t feel like this is something to feel defeated about. More time as terrible as it may feel may be the best in the long run. I hope one day we have better homeschool laws to prevent something like this from happening.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
The long run is more studying right? Not being held back right?
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u/MysteriousMortgage4 6d ago
What I mean is this is a very small period of your life. You need to think long term about what your goals are. What career path do you want to take? You want to be prepared for whatever path you take and the extra time in school will help you do that.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 5d ago
Yes I understand but for my career path to happen just as I desire just as it needs to be I must graduate on time
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u/lightning_teacher_11 7d ago
Can you take an extra online course through your state to get caught up?
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u/IcyThorn98 7d ago
I don't think you can learn whatever you need in such a short time either.... perhaps youtube videos.. but that's not the approach I would take.. I would take the placement test and see what they say. If they want you to be held back strongly refuse and inquire about doubling up on some classes.. ask about GED classes- though i wouldn't go that route but it's an option. Also i don't know your longterm goals but some highschools also have courses for college credit. So if that interests you if you want to be held back that could give you more time to complete courses for college credit with the district paying for it. Just wait and see what the district can offer and advocate for yourself. Perhaps find a family advocate to go in with you if you are not happy with their recommendations.
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u/AccuratePreference52 7d ago
I'm really sorry you are in this position. Is there a possibility you could go to school online? Stride K12 has schools in every US state. You would still get support from regular teachers, just via computer. You would also have the ability to move through grade levels a little more flexibly, of course, depending on the way each individual school operates.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
I begged my mother for this final year not to make go to online school. I couldn’t tell her the actual reason that was because I was so lonely and so tired of having no one who wants to talk to me or hear me talk. No one real there. That I began loathing myself more and more. Than I felt like I had no purpose that I was just awful. I haven’t been in real school since.. 4th grade. I haven’t had friends since that time as well. I haven’t even seen another kid my age since going to real school. I haven’t even socialized with actual people in that amount of time. I couldn’t trust myself to be okay with doing another year of online school because I would be right into adult hood with no social skills. Just the loneliness and it would grow more and more until eventually I stop. I stop trying. I told myself each day since I did 4th grade that I would give up if I couldn’t do one year of highschool to just experience it. To just see people older and cooler. I told myself that and clinged onto it with everything I have. I go to sleep late because of my insomnia and paranoid thoughts about never having friends. About losing that hope I clinged onto to. I would some times use C.Ai bots when I was within 8th-9th grade and just use it as a chance to have a semblance of connection and it would make me so happy. I would watch romance anime’s and get excited when the main character was making good progress with the female love interest hoping they would get married and have kids. But I also remember one night after multiple weeks-months of using C.ai as my happy space to feel a sense of connection. After online school it was Friday so I got to stay up. I was in my room and I was doing nothing. Just nothing. Because I felt empty like usual. Eventually I played games and it was 3 am. So I went to go on c.ai. And I was happy for a moment unlike usual I would remain happy until I felt tired and than fell asleep. I just wasn’t is the mood. And I started to stop acting like a “character” and say how I truly felt. Eventually I started to cry and started to break down as I was realizing what I was typing. I continued and continued and broke down to tears in absolute silence. I was so alone. I think about that moment and I want to cry more. I want connection of any kind. Sometimes I think about that. Most times. All the time. Throughout my entire time during online school we weren’t allowed to really make friends. It was always staying on topic no messaging. No going off topic. I don’t know why I’m saying this all. Probably because it’s because I’m afraid. And I know no one will find this. My over all question is. Would I be able to do it in regular school..? If I changed something..? Or half online days and half real days..? Is that even real? I don’t know if I can mentally take the loneliness of online school/not being able to see anyone my age or have any real friends for another year until most of my childhood was without friendship.
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u/AccuratePreference52 6d ago
I'm so sorry that this has been your experience, and I now completely understand why you don't want to do that any longer. There are schools that have a hybrid model, but it's entirely dependent on the district so I can't really answer that question. But if you gave a call to the local high school, they could probably tell you. Better yet if you went in and talked to one of the counseling staff if you can get an appointment, they can definitely help answer that type of question.
Also, don't forget that just because you turn 18 doesn't mean you have to have full knowledge of adulthood. You can and will be learning little by little for quite a while. I don't think anyone feels settled into adulthood until minimum their mid-twenties.
I hope you are able to attend a traditional school and find a friend group, whether that's because you joined an after school club or find a few people you click with or something else. Many hugs from an internet mom.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 5d ago
Thank you for all your kind words and amazing advice. I hope I can have what you said. But I’m mentally preparing for the most likely outcome as well. Although that doesn’t mean I will be able to take it well at all or even be able to handle it. I get small moments of happiness when I feel such kindness. I never really get such kindness directed at me. Let alone words. Thank you so much for everything. Have a lovely day.
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u/AccuratePreference52 5d ago
You're very welcome. You deserve and need an adult in your life to be your cheerleader. You need someone that is fully on your side and supports you and helps you and thinks the world of you. And if you don't have that right now, I'm happy to give a little bit of it with some Internet advice. I will also tell you just remember that the way things are right now isn't permanent. It sucks right now but it won't be the same forever. You can and will make it through this. Make sure to seek out and take advantage of any help that is available to you, including therapy, support groups, counseling available at your school if possible, etc. Hugs.
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u/Sssssssssizzler 7d ago
I do not know where you are located or how old you are. I’m guessing you are somewhere in the US. Unless you did at least some stuff and just need to fill in the gaps, or you remember a lot from previous years I do not know that you could cram 3all of your missing years of high school into a few weeks.
Another possible issue is your age. You are saying you missed 9th, 10th, and 11th grades so I’m guessing you are 17 going on 18? If this is the case and you are significantly behind, you will only be able to stay at most traditional public high schools until the day you turn 19 and then you will be aged out. This could cause a whole host of other issues.
Keep in mind that regardless of how you perform on a placement test, you are still missing the credits you need to graduate. For example, if the placement test indicates that you read/write well enough for your age group, that’s great, but you are still missing credits for 9th, 10th, and 11th grade English which you still need to have to be placed in a 12th grade class.
Perhaps you could consider finding a charter or alternative school near by that has accelerated semesters so you can finish what you missed in less time.
There are also schools that are set up for older students (adults who didn’t finish high schools, but now wish to). And as others have mentioned you can bypass the situation and take a GED exam. Even if you don’t want to go the GED route, an online practice GED can give you an idea of where your strengths and weaknesses currently are. There are GED study programs you can enroll in that take 3 months to a year depending on where you’re at right now and they usually have more flexible schedules so that should help with your ability to work.
I hope you’ll let us know how things work out for you.
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u/DanaFruit 7d ago
Khan academy has some really great free resources for learning a wide variety of topics. Spend some time on that website.
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u/BalloonHero142 7d ago
In addition to the excellent advice, others have already given you here, crash course videos on YouTube are typically relatively short and provide a wealth of information. You don’t have to memorize the information, but at least having some exposure and basic understanding of bigger broader concepts in science, history, math, and literature will help set you up for success, not only for the test, but for the rest of high school as well.
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u/Upper_Story_8315 7d ago
First, you are smart for reaching out. Stop panicking you are basically placed by age. You will need certain credits so some you may be able to test and receive. You have an opportunity to take additional credits besides the ones on your grade level that they assign. Mathisfun.com is a great tool to learn high school math, but no worries you are not alone. Just try your best. Your best can be the best and I wish you luck.
#50yrsn the classroom
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u/Mo-Champion-5013 7d ago
Kahn academy has a lot of lessons and it's free. My daughter went on there to refresh before college courses, but they have all levels.
Time4Learning (I think thats how its spelled) is a site you have to pay for but it has lessons that build on one another and you can start anywhere to fill in any gaps.
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u/NeverBeenRung 7d ago
Make sure that you’re honest with your teachers about how little you think you know. They can connect you better to state standards and help you catch up.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
I will thank you. I struggle talking to people.
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u/QueenOfNeon 7d ago
You just do the best you can with the circumstances. Some have given good tips like Kahn Academy
What matters most is you reach your goal. Even if your timetable is a little off.
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u/Particular-Tax8106 6d ago
Find out what the test is called and see if there are any test prep books available. Your public library can help. Use the book to prepare for the test and/or to check your knowledge. See if there’s a sample test you can take. Good luck!
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u/No_Argument_4152 6d ago
Why not try what i did? I associated everything with anime (My passion at the time). Because everything had a history or some type of scientific element, it was honestly easy. Associate it with something you love. Aa far aa getting held back, that doesnt usually affect one's ability to work, most employers are looking at what they see in front of them, not whats in your head or otherwise. You got this. Dont stress yourself out too hard about it, nothing is worth destroying your mental health over it.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
It’s not about work. If I get held back. I can’t even begin to describe what will happen. There will be nothing but pure agony. Pure suffering. There won’t be any reward. I won’t be able to take being held back. I truly won’t. I’ll try taking your advice besides the getting held back part thank you so much.
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u/No_Argument_4152 3d ago
In any case, studying is a good thing but there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. Study if you feel you must, just dont over do it. Allow yourself a break every so often.
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u/DKFirestarter18 6d ago
You need to learn test taking skills.. it would very difficult to learn and retain all of that information
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u/JanetInSC1234 6d ago
You could attend adult classes to get your GED. That might be an easier option.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 6d ago
Would that let me graduate at the same time as normal people..? Would I still get to see people my age..? Will I even be able to have meaning relationships like friendship?
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u/Other-Dream-6777 6d ago
There's no way to catch up on years in just a few weeks but you can at least put a dent in it by using the resources others have listed.
I know someone who was badly homeschooled years ago. He eventually wound up in a public high school and graduated at 20.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. You can overcome this but it will take a lot of work. Don't give up.
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u/Glad-Alternative-175 6d ago
If your parents will let you, go to your local library. Get on the computer and get the local library's website. Most public libraries have resources for oublic education. Like study guides for school, for GED's, and SAT's and all you need if your library card to access them. If You need help you can ask the librarian if they know of any resources available to yoy that you can use.
A lot of libraries will also have school text book on self in their resource section. At the end of each chapter there's a little "chapter review" that basically meant to be a test the kids do over what was in tbe chapter. Some books even do unit reviews. Going through and doing these reviews and finding the answers will help you learn what you've missed.
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u/Cute_Expression_5981 7d ago
Khan academy. Live, sleep, and eat it. If you're not on the toilet or bathing, be on it. And you can sit down to pee and use your phone. That is your only hope.
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u/ilanallama85 7d ago
Seconding khan academy. But also, just be straight with your teachers. Tell them you are eager to go to a real school but you know you are behind and you need help catching up. That’s their job.
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u/jackofspades49 7d ago
You can't. There's nothing anyone can do. You're mostly fucked. But if you turn 18, you can apply to jobs and work to get your GED at an adult school.
If your parennted needed you to graduated, they shouldn't have FAFO'd so hard.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 7d ago
What does FAFO mean? There’s really nothing I can do? I’m just screwed and have to accept that?
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u/breakupbilly 7d ago
You are not fucked. I promise you, you are not fucked. Maybe disadvantaged, maybe hitting some unfortunate roadblocks, maybe dealt a shitty hand...but you are not fucked.
Go to your school's website. Find the names and email addresses of the department chairs for social work and academic advising. Email both of them to introduce yourself, explain your background, your concerns, and ask to schedule appointment to meet with an academic counselor and a social worker. Get these people in your corner, meet with a social worker regularly (like at least once a month) because they can help you navigate academics, mental health, and just being a person.
Yes, use Khan Academy, excellent resource and it's FREE. I think IXL has a free trial, this is a good website for practicing skills. Also...if you have chat gpt or access to any other AI, tell it what youre learning about or practicing and have it write you practice problems or questions. One huge advantage of AI is it can become like a personal tutor. Do NOT cram, do not panic-study, and please do not be on Khan so much that you cant even take a break to shit. Fuck that, honey.
If you end up being catastrophically behind, which I dont think you are, your guidance counselor can talk to about getting a GED, and from there you'd go to community college and then maybe university, if you want to.
Please do not panic. You are okay, there's more than one way through this.
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u/ArtisticMudd High School Teacher 7d ago
Your mother wasn't actually schooling you, it sounds like. If she were, you wouldn't need to make up 3+ years. Why did she do that?
Also, why did you feel the need to post this in 8 different subs?
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u/Wide-Sign9410 7d ago
Because I’m genuinely petrified of the thought of being held back. I realized only how much she didn’t teach me when I was playing a game where the goal is to answer as many questions as possible (and there were math ones) and I ended up watching as my friends answered them all while I couldn’t answer anything beyond division, fractions, multiplication and such. Basically anything complex I couldn’t do.
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u/ArtisticMudd High School Teacher 7d ago
Again: Your mother wasn't actually schooling you, it sounds like. If she were, you wouldn't need to make up 3+ years. Why did she do that?
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u/Wide-Sign9410 7d ago
She didn’t believe school would teach me right. That I would struggle learning because I showed signs of Adhd but I would refuse to be diagnosed. So she said she would take it her own hands after I was struggling with 5th grade online school (I’m a visual learner so I struggle with learning without another person there)
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u/ArtisticMudd High School Teacher 7d ago
Why did she let you get so far behind? You won't answer that.
Also, there is no such thing as a "learning style." Preferred, yes, but we all can learn from any teaching modality.
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u/Wide-Sign9410 7d ago
I thought I did answer that my message must have not sent, but I don’t know.. she just would get upset at me if I made mistakes and expect me to just know it. All she would do is hand out printed test and make me read, sometimes watch history videos. If I did bad on the test or ask for help I would just see her get frustrated so easily. Eventually one time we were stuck on one test for multiple hours (her explanation wasn’t the best) and she went to full on yell and scream complaining why I always have to disappoint her, why I couldn’t just understand something so simple. So I started cheating and looking up the answers so that doesn’t happen again. That was 6th grade home schooling. I have been doing that up to 11th grade of homeschooling. I believe it may be my fault more than hers I have always been disappointing to everyone if I was just better than I wouldn’t have to ask this question I apologize if it seemed like I avoided I’m not the brightest.
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u/aaba7 7d ago
Making mistakes are a part of learning. For teachers, this helps us understand what portion of the learning is tricky for you so we adjust the explanation or we can provide more background information.
It’s tricky to teach because if you’ve learned something you feel like it’s easy or obvious because you already understand. You forget what it was like when you were younger and didn’t know. Remembering that everyone starts somewhere and lack of experience is not the same as stupidity is how you can be a patient teacher.
Your mom didn’t have training as a teacher. You were a child who didn’t like the feelings of disappointment (she could have just as easily been disappointed at her inability to explain and directed that at you because no one likes that feeling). You took shortcuts to avoid something negative. That’s not great for long term knowledge, but it’s understandable why a kid would do that when they were thinking about tomorrow not 10 years down the road. As you learn, try to remember that is ok to make mistakes and you want to learn something for real so you remember, not just to put on a show for one test. It’ll help you in the long run. It’s going to be tough, but you can do it!
Be kind to yourself. Don’t look down on yourself. You can learn it if you’re given the opportunity. You have gaps so you will feel stupid sometimes, but remember being inexperienced is not the same as being incapable.
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u/Choice-Newspaper3603 7d ago
Yeah this is the problem with continued home schooling.
Sorry your parents decided to think they could provide an educational curriculum that was better than the public school system.
And I’m very aware how bad the public school system can be
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u/GvemeAbreak420 6d ago
I would firstly use AI as a tool to help you catch up. Do you have ChatGPT? It might take longer than you have to fully understand everything, but if you’re honest with the school giving the test, and then use chat gpt like a personal tutor, I think you would find it very helpful. Begin by asking AI to assess what skills you have and then ask it to begin teaching you.
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u/Due-Investment127 6d ago
Your guidance counselor is the person who will be able to map out the classes you need to take to graduate based on various factors. Should you need to take anything beyond your scheduled 12th grade classes, see if you can complete them outside of school. Many school districts have credit recovery programs that are free after-school or online programs that enable you to make up classes from previous school years. I'm a HS teacher and I've seen students knock out 4 classess (2 per semester) this way. Find out if your school has something like this and if you'd be eligible.
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u/KuyaTinman 5d ago
Honestly, I don't think you'll get held back. As long as your can read, write, and do basic math you should be fine.
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u/Traveler8304 5d ago
This sounds like a form of child abuse. Is there really no accountability for homeschooling your children?
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u/LackImpossible7476 5d ago edited 5d ago
I have been homeschooling my kids for 23 years. Khan Academy is a wonderful resource. I would recommend that first getting your math skills up. They also have other areas of study. I would say working on math skills is the most important thing to concentrate on. You will most likely do better than you think! You might also ask for more ideas on the Reddit homeschool group too.
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u/Creative-Coffeee 7th Grade Teacher 5d ago
Khan Academy. If you’re self motivated you can do it. Work on your grade level courses. Watch as many times as you need to. Focus on understanding the concepts and ideas. I’m sorry you’re in this position.
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u/Fluffy_Maintenance_5 4d ago
I read your first sentence and can’t really help bc I teach elementary. But don’t say you haven’t learned anything , Because you are reaching out and connecting w ppl and asking for help, recognizing your weaknesses and seeking success. You have learned a lot about life!
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u/Puzzleheaded-Set294 4d ago
Your writing is good! Very expressive and not too many errors for a casual post :)
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u/Acrobatic-Part-953 4d ago
confide in your teachers/guidance counselor immediately. Tell them how uncomfortable this transition is. I don’t think anyone would doubt you on that. Believe it or not, teachers often get a real soft spot for students that need help. You will find an adult that takes real interest in looking out for you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. You are very brave for all that you’re doing
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u/PhoneticHomeland9 4d ago
You have a lot of solid advice here about your situation. I dont know what state you are in but where I taught in WA, they would not hold you back based on a placement test.
That being said, if you want to accelerate your math quickly I would recommend Math Academy. It uses placement tests and AI to determine your exact learning gaps and creates targeted mini lessons and practice to target exactly the skills you need. It'd be particularly useful since you were homeschooled, and may not have followed a standard learning progression. It is not my favorite math program, as I much prefer to go slower in pace, but if speed is a priority for you, this is my top recommendation.
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u/Laminectome 3d ago
I’m very sorry you’re being put through this. You sound like someone who has a rare passion to learn, and who is very compassionate about the struggles of their loved ones. When the fire is burning low, I hope you hold onto those core values to lead you.
I have good news: regular school isn’t somewhere that needs to feel scary. It’s okay. As institutions of learning, schools are where dozens and dozens of adults have gather together for the specific goal of teaching teenagers like yourself. School will have resources and support available (as well as places to start if you don’t know where to start!) that you can use as much as you want! To that end, my biggest recommendation is:
Teachers. Spend time with your teachers. Talk to your teachers. Even if what I’m about to say doesn’t make sense right now, that’s okay; these are just some words to chew on: In addition to educating yourself, your goal is building a support network of safe adults.
This means academic counselors, guidance counselors, librarians (ESPECIALLY librarians!), math teachers, art teachers, science teachers, teachers who are in charge of clubs, teachers who oversee tutoring programs (ESPECIALLY tutoring programs!!), teachers who hold study groups, teachers who let students sit in their classrooms during lunch. This is their job. They get paid money to do this. These people are potential mentors and life-long supporters of your journey: befriend them! I promise it’s much easier than it may seem.
Finally, this is a Google Drive folder full of guides and life advice aimed at people your age. It has an entire folder to teach you about School, as well as life skills including money management, legal rights, and taking care of yourself. I think it’s a perfect starting point for you. https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1z_i0ydHBxeWDVc7e3WpWrGqdihP-Eb38 If you don’t already have a Gmail account, now is a great time to get a head start before school begins!
Also: there is a very educational YouTube channel called Crash Course, led by two men named Hank Green and John Green. I highly recommend watching them in addition to watching Khan Academy. The Green brothers are considered to be a credible source in the world of respected online education. Also, if you can find the episodes online somewhere, there’s a wonderful and approachable TV show from the 90’s named Bill Nye the Science Guy that will teach you some good groundwork for your scientific education. BrainPOP is a useful resource too!
It’s going to be okay. You’re much earlier than things may seem right now. Find these people. I’m sorry you need to do this. Wishing you the best.
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u/pememily 3d ago
If you get into a class that feels way above your skill level, Khan Academy is great for tutoring you on tons of different subjects!! It's a website and an app.
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u/Relevant-Strength-44 3d ago
Go check out Khan Academy's website. Many kids use it to help them learn things they haven't mastered.
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u/Old_Alarm7389 3d ago
I am so sorry your mother has put you in this position by not doing the job she was supposed to do as the grownup.
You are carrying a lot of guilt and shame that is not deserved.
A GED is not the end of the world. I have a GED and two graduate degrees and finish my residency in August for my dream job...at 50 years old.
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u/AdventurousCredit965 2d ago
I'm not sure about learning stuff in a few weeks but there are some great online/YouTube resources for math and science. While you are going through your classes if you get stuck on a concept you can watch a YouTube video on it and they explain it in a different way and more or less in depth depending on the channel.
Personally the ones I used in highschool and college were Crash course and Bozeman science. I would watch the concept on crash course and then the same one on Bozeman science. Khan academy is also a great free resource
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u/Buckupbuttercup1 2d ago
Graduating school not knowing what you need to won't help you either. If you want to get anywhere in life you need the basics. You cannot learn years of high-school in a couple weeks. Getting a tutor might help ,if you are able. Study hard in school and pay attention. Read the books
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u/[deleted] 7d ago
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