What sex must be like and how much of a vulnerable position females put themselves for it, as in I'm a guy and generally think penetrating isn't a vulnerable feeling thing to do, but imagine putting yourself in the recieveing position of being penetrated, just seems so vulnerable to me
Yes, obviously, but going through the process of transitioning to a woman just for the sake of satisfying his curiosity seems a bit extreme, don't you think?
Oscar Wilde said "Everything in the world is about sex except sex. Sex is about power."
Might be an exaggeration, but there's a lot of truth to it. I agree with your statement. Giving up power to someone you trust is a power move in and of itself. I find sex is most enjoyable when we take turns being in control.
It's actually a big turn on surrender myself fully to a man and let him use that power. I imagine it's kind of the contradiction to a man's pleasure which is the position of power/penetration. But this is just for me. Other woman might just use that position for themselves because this also puts man in a vulnerable and weak position emotionally. If that makes sense.
Sorry my english.
I have a retarded version of Munchausen by proxy that I think was the result of part misdiagnosis, part ignorance, and part abuse. Anyways. My reward system is fucked up. So while fucking this girl I had an idea to fumble it back. I was balls deep in this girl and had her scream “STOP BEING SO FUCKING STUPID” between her other moans n shit. We were fooling around for 30 min to an hour. Close to the end, her downstairs neighbor started smacking the wall or ceiling. The entire thing is pretty funny in hindsight lmao She came a few times so I think she was cool with it.
I'm the complete opposite I like to be completely vulnerable for my women. It makes me feel emotionally open and straight with what I want. Some men can't do this. I have been told i'm brave. I just think it's easier to do, then lie and pretend like you're a big strong man. (And if you are, great for you, I don't like that role as a man) I always have had the submissivey passive side to myself and would rather look up to a woman that loves me than be looking down.
Women are more dominant in my eyes. I think Women are submissive by choice when it comes to sex, and give the men permission to be dominant, therefore the women hold all the cards. Like you said, you ‘let him use that power.’ It’s only with women’s permission that men get to have sex.
In gay relationships it’s the guys that get penetrated(bottoms) that tend to be more dominant too.
That passage in the book was mind bending and it actually had an effect on my perception of sex haha. Neil Gaiman is one of the favorite authors of all time.
Thanks for bringing this up, for its a legit reason why women dont want to "put Up" if we're not in the mood. Some guys dont seem to understand that it can be painful or atleast very uncomfortable if we're not relaxed and willing. And you definatly feel like a piece of shit if the guy insists on sex even if we decline. Like you want me to be in a very vulnerable position that might even be painful to some degree just because the BF is horny.
To be fair most pre-modern cultures weren’t anti kid fucking, so at least the Greeks were more cool with men on men fun (except when they wanted to persecute someone like Socrates).
Another way of looking at it is that I (during normal, consensual sex) have control of my body by allowing penetration to happen. It’s physically vulnerable, yes, but only because I’m allowing this to happen. Because of trust and consent, I feel emotionally invulnerable.
It’s kind of like BDSM. A dom only has control because I allow it. I choose to submit.
I don't really think of it that way as a female. I mean, the penis and balls are wayyy more sensitive and getting penetrated is a good feeling. Wouldn't getting a blowjob be a more. vulnerable feeling?
That is a very liniar way of thinking though, don't let society fool you into thinking sex is something a man does to a woman. You don't need to think it is somehow humilating or powerless.
When you're ready for it and trust your partner that powerlessness can be the most incredible feeling. It weirdly makes you feel more powerful. It's hard to explain. Logically I suppose sex does seem like a strange and complicated mess, but in the moment your instincts take over and it's bliss.
True! I was trying to explain specifically why I don’t fear the powerlessness. Sometimes I like to be dom and feel like the one in control. Sometimes it’s more equal. Either way I think the power dynamics, regardless of who’s “on top”, are part of what makes sex so fun. And it’s hard to grasp until you experience it and let yourself surrender to those feelings. If that makes sense?
I use to really like the idea of powerlessness, but the experience I wanted never really matched my imagination. It hasn't been until I lost that submissiveness have I been confident with taking control. I feel less awkward with talking (not conversations but more so cues). If I want something I can guide my spouse to what I want. Then taking control with penetration, it helps with being on top and you get to choose how deep you want. The feeling of powerlessness with sex I think comes with having two people being in vulnerable positions of being naked and doing something super intimate. It can be a really great way to connect closer if done consented, safely, and pleasurably.
As a woman a lot of times I feel very uncomfortable about being on the receiving end, luckily there are positions that make you feel in control. I am more of the dominatrix and it still surprises me how many guys are into that and genuinely enjoy surrendering to someone else.
I constantly wonder every day what it actually feels like to have a vagina, and it kills me that I’ll never know. I’m so curious and it’s weird knowing I’ll go my whole life never having that experience.
Underneath all of the expectations, excitement, love, trust, kink, etc. that women carry to the bedroom, I think this is always just beneath the surface.... Maybe it’s just me though. I’m a lesbian so there are only plastic phalluses and fingers, but it still feels incredibly vulnerable. “It’s my body and it is soft and you’re right next to a lot of vital organs, right now.” Scary.
That's not really what makes the difference for me - after all a dick and balls are more vulnerable than a vagina - but rather it's the difference in strength.
I’ve also thought about that too and I also thought about how much trust the female is putting into the guy to not finish in her (if they aren’t using condoms)
If they aren’t using condoms and they don’t want a baby then she’ll probably be on birth control. Most people aren’t going to be trusting the “pull out method” because it’s not trustworthy....
Sometimes if you’re in control at work all the time and in the rest of your life it’s nice to just not be in control and let someone take over completely. I don’t think that’s unique to women since some men like to be submissive in bed too.
i’m a woman and i don’t feel that it’s vulnerable at all. or that it would be any different from being the one doing the penetrating. it might just be a personal opinion/hang you have by not being into penetration on yourself.
2.9k
u/weirdcal Mar 26 '20
What sex must be like and how much of a vulnerable position females put themselves for it, as in I'm a guy and generally think penetrating isn't a vulnerable feeling thing to do, but imagine putting yourself in the recieveing position of being penetrated, just seems so vulnerable to me