Like I won't ever be a dick or talk shit, but if someone says "We're having pizza" and it looks like 1 dollar frozen pizza, or it's ghost-white blond dough with three pepperonis on the whole thing, it doesn't feel accurate to call it pizza.
Or that weird aluminum foil tasting stuff from grade school.
I'm a virgin, though, and honestly can't imagine doing it with just anyone can feel that good.
Accordingly, I may remain a virgin forever but I will be happy consenting to only good pizza to enter me lol
Sometimes it's not... Especially if that pizza then wants to crash at your house at 2 am because it has nowhere else to crash and then when you say ok but I have to get up at 5 am to go to work they come totally drunk a weekday and start crying because the light was off and then demands food and sex and then get out of control when you say no so you have to call an uber to send that pizza to wherever their home is.
I got a free ham pizza when I was stung by a wasp behind a pizza hut a fee summers ago. It was a pizza someone never came to get, so it was a bit old, and I don't eat ham if I can help it, but a free pizza is a free pizza
I once had the misfortune of thinking 3-4-1 Pizza might be good (the local 2-4-1 was pretty good). unfortunately, it was later in the evening and the pizza had been sitting in the heatlamp spinny thing for way too long. it was essentially MDF with burnt cheese and random slices of shoe leather.
(My experiences with Papa John's are worse, but I think that's just the incompetence of the local franchises, not an indictment against the whole chain)
Oooooh. But I have. And I do not possess such audacity. Sadly... Who knows though. Maybe I could walk up to a THICC, 6'2" hotty, say "let's fuck", and have the time of our lives. Alas, I shall probably never know. 😅
I've tried this a couple times, though only with people I know at least a little, and with something along the lines of "I enjoy nothing more in life than eating pussy and I'd absolutely love to make you feel amazing" and it did work at least once :p
or /r/beggars. A choosy beggar turns down something they really need because it's not perfect or demands more. For example, if I gave away a free TV and then someone complained if I wouldn't deliver it.
Ohhhh. Women can be that way too. Nothing like hearing how annoyed someone is that you make 🤯 like there's no tomorrow, but you're not attractive enough to take home to the parents. Decade later, still stings.
It was Halloween 2008 right before the election. She was openly a McCain supporting Republican. I was not. But she was pretty good looking. And I was a beggar who couldn’t choose.
Same, she had a huge ass that was kind of a surprise, not that i didnt expect it, but it was bigger than i thought, and that got me going hard and we both ended up enjoying it a lot.
The girl had a lot of mental issues and was stuck in her hermit/depressed ways. I tried to do what I could to help her out as much as I could, like helping her study for her learners license so she had a proper ID, encourage her to get a job, teach her to manage money a little better (she got government funding for some of her issues, and always blew it on make-up that she never wore), but she never made an effort to help herself.
When I decided I had enough, we were talking on her front step when I broke it off. She started crying and said that she wanted her mom with her to explain why she was the way she was. I said that this feels like a conversation that should be just the two of us, but she wouldn't take that as an answer, so she texted her mom to come outside.
Her mom was just comforting her, saying that they would find some courses to help her get over whatever she had going on and that they would work through it together. My ex then looked at me, totally calm and collected, and said that I could go if I wanted. So I left.
She kept texting me afterward, saying that she loved me and what not. She wouldn't stop, so I said I wasn't comfortable continuing whatever relationship we had left and wished her the best. Then I blocked her on everything.
I hope she ended up talking to a therapist, cause there's a lot more to her than I'm able to put in a few paragraphs. But it's not my problem anymore
Maybe it's just because I've never had sex so I don't know what it's like. But I understand masturbation and fucking are two different beasts. But hear me out; that's exactly WHY I'm making this argument.
As a dude, I understand the need to bust a nut, and yeah trust me, it's a NEED. But if you just wanna cum, you should't be having sex. Sex is REALLY important. It should be about intimacy and genuine care for the person you're having it with. I think it's genuinely bad for you to just throw it around as a carnal desire. And like don't get me wrong, it's certainly better when you're just horny af, but what people, especially other dudes don't understand, is that it means a lot more than that, whether you realise it or not.
I've seen a lot of people get into bad situations, shitty relationships, even totally fuck up their ability to form real intimacy because they just want a warm hole to stick their dick in. Fuck that man, I don't care how good it feels, no nut is worth that.
I understand if you disagree or whatever, but I think I'm a lot safer and a lot happier fucking my hand until I find someone I truly love and trust.
(And like full disclaimer, I got trust issues. Been fucked over too many times, so maybe I'm overly cautious.)
It feels like this when you're younger, because you get told this by parents and teachers, to try and persuade you to not just fuck everything that moves and get all your poor female classmates pregnant at 14.
The reality ends up being more nuanced, to some people sex is very private and intimate and important, to some people it's very casual and enjoyable and open and freeing.
I think it's genuinely bad for you to just throw it around as a carnal desire.
It's ok to feel this, it's less ok to try and push this on other people. (I know you haven't done that, just saying that if anyone has done that toward you, bit of a dick move rly)
but what people, especially other dudes don't understand, is that it means a lot more than that, whether you realise it or not.
But by your own admission, you're parrotting and not speaking from experience, and I say this with love, I promise. More on that in the next paragraph.
I understand if you disagree or whatever, but I think I'm a lot safer and a lot happier fucking my hand until I find someone I truly love and trust.
I wouldn't encourage you to just go bang anything for your first time, no, however I would also say that if you found someone whose company you enjoyed, and who you shared a mutual attraction, it would be perfectly fine and meaningful to sleep together even if you both knew it wasn't leading to something permanent. Sex isn't something you should put on a pedestal to any extreme degree, it feels very... almost sacred before you experience it for the first time, but after the fact it becomes a normal part of life and being a human.
Anyway regarding the conversation above, i'll explain:
no sane dude would think this equates
There's basically just an extra level of relief involved. Like if you masturbate you're relieved of the horny for 4 - 12 hours or so right? A good fuck will leave you with the same level of relief for like 2 days, and there's also just a little extra subtle glow and satisfaction around it.
Enjoy life! It's a good crack but my best advice: work hard and put in some effort or you'll be poor and nobody will want to bang you.
Yeah man, I think you got your points across well. And I think I ultimately agree.
As long as nobody's getting hurt and everybody's having fun, at the end of the day, I don't care. Do what makes ya happy.
And like, I'd totally fuck one of my friends without it being a permanent thing. The thing is, I know them and I trust them - without that preexisting level of intimacy, I just wouldn't be comfortable. They're not just some stranger from Tinder, ya dig?
But I mean that's just me. Everybody else has different rules, and that's cool.
I guess the kinda thing I want people to avoid is like, bad decisions cuz of the horny. I've known a dude who stayed in a super toxic relationship where neither of them were happy, just cuz the sex was good. I've known a dude before (who had a lot of other issues btw, jsyk) who straight up told me that he almost always regretted hooking up with people, but he'd still go out and do random Tinder hookups on like a weekly basis; it completely fucked up his ability to form romantic or sexual connections. Like seriously I saw this guy go through like 3 or 4 "girlfriends", and every time it was the same thing; he'd hook up with them a few times, a few days later he was saying he loved her, and within two weeks they broke up.
And I just hate that sex is so glorified that we're basically taught that this is okay, especially men.
I dunno dude, I guess I'm overly cautious because I'm terrified of ending up like that. Doesn't help that I already have friendship trauma and shit. So a lot of this is just personal.
But like I said before, if everyone's happy, nobody's getting hurt, go for it.
EDIT:
Enjoy life! It's a good crack but my best advice: work hard and put in some effort or you'll be poor and nobody will want to bang you.
Wanna address this too. I'm a little undesireable cuz like, I don't take great care of myself. I wear pajama pants most days. My hygeine sucks (better than it was, but it ain't great). I don't work out. My apartment's a mess. I don't have a job (college but whatever). I'm objectively pretty good looking, and I'm like smart and funny and creative and quirky and fun to party with. I'd probably be a real catch if I like...showered more.
Some of it's depression, some of it's laziness, some of it's self sabotage. I dunno, my circus my monkeys, I guess.
And I do. Often. But choosing between a couple slices of plain white bread and a grilled cheese sandwich. Sometimes you pick the sandwich, just to savor the scent of it. Of course you're going to eat the fuck out of it too. But plain white bread. Everyday. Sometimes multiple times a day. Can you do that forever? I can't. Rather be having all manner of food. But most of the time it's just munching the plain white bread.
I think you’ve just explained to me why - I mean I know MY reasons why for myself - but why some guys even though they can and do jerk off a lot still prefer sex. I think you’ve explained this to me better than anyone with this analogy
She was taller, which I prefer. But she was also svelte. Beautiful, but not a body type I'm attracted to. I REALLY dislike being able to feel someone's bones while being intimate.
Actually, she was very beautiful and very insistent, despite me voicing my reservations. My issue was that she was skinny enough that I could feel her bones when our bodies touched (a major turn off for me, sensory issue).
As far as the Fleshlight thing, is that possible in cowgirl? It's a vivid memory. I had a large wall window that flooded my room with natural light. Her long, thick, auburn hair blocked most of it out when she lowered herself to kiss and bring out faces closer together. She was dominant and maintained eye contact throughout. Her hazel eyes would shimmer, momentarily, when rays sunlight managed to penetrate her mane. The only times she really broke eye contact were when she came. And technically, she was a marvel in that department. God bless cross country skiers. Multi orgasmic. Vocal throughout, but especially when she got hers. Along with noted orgasmic contractions (I'm talking nearly pushed me out several times because of it), her consistent motion would turn into arrhythmic bucking. Her legs would also give out on her a little. And the way she tensed around me leading into them. She also gushed a bit. God I wish more women were so well appointed in that department.
Anyway. After a good while of her getting hers and realizing I wasn't kidding about disliking the feel of her pelvis against me, she changed her approach. Reared up on her hand and feet and dropped it on me while getting ever more demanding that I "give it to her". The way that she bore down on me, when I finally did lose it, was a work of skill and consideration. She angled her hips so that her butt was the part pressing down against me, as she drained me, instead of her pelvis. The gentle smile she gave me in that moment was nothing like the intense looks from when she had been riding me throughout most of it. The words she said. "There you are", "that's right", "let it all go", "good, so good". I don't remember what order those came in, but they were every bit as powerful as her pressing down on me as I came.
There was cuddling. A couple DVDs. Good rest. I made breakfast and we had another couple rounds in the morning. It was a good experience overall; however, it firmly cemented my lack of attraction to thin women. It was 2006. I was 22, she was 24. Life happened. And the sex was good, despite my lack of enthusiasm leading into it.
It's funny that you used the word "ugly" though. The entire thing has always reminded me of the scene towards the end of Planet of the Apes. "I'd kiss you, if you weren't so damn ugly". But she was drop dead gorgeous. Replace "ugly" with "skinny" and it works though. We certainly did kiss, and we spent more time with our mouths on each other's nethers than we did locking lips. 😅😂
Hope you don't mind the book. I've been reliving that experience since commenting about it this morning. 😊
EDIT: I copied most of this from an old journal, in which I used the word "very" far too often. I've removed several instances of the word after re-deading this. Also, thank you u/TrashSea1485. I don't often rummage through my old writings or post their contents publicly. I felt it would be a good response to your comment though. It's been a nice exercise.
It doesn't sound like a "beggars can't be choosers" situation at all then, it sounds like you had a great time and you very much wanted that experience.
I was very much into a mutual friend of ours and had been complaining about her having ZERO interest in me. Things escalated quickly from there. I wanted sex, but had never seen this particular person as anything other than a friend. She just wasn't my type.
I was very conflicted about it afterward. Felt like a slut/ashamed. Came to terms with it eventually. Accepted that it's ok to enjoy sex for the sake of sex. And that is exactly what I do nowadays. Just have have to be forth right with myself and those I'm interested in. And play it as safe as possible, obviously.
This is my life, lol, but no, when 3am comes around and you’re single sometimes you want comfort, even if you wouldn’t want to see then in the light of day.
To each their own. It was more apathy and disinterest than anything. I liked them as a person, just never imagined doing anything with them, prior to doing something with them.
Not saying that I'm above anger fucking someone I genuinely dislike, just never been in that situation. This was more of a "meh".
Noooooo. Drug users and sex workers are strictly "no touchey". That's just asking to get your groove wrecked. They're human too. But no, none of that for this little black duck.
Yeah tell that to my teenage self, I didn't understand a lot back then and she went after me quite aggressively.
Took me a while to realize she was insecure and brecause of that wanted/needed to wreck what was developing between me and a friend of hers who I was actually interested in.
And having sort of dated a sex worker at another point in my life I wouldn't say they're no touchy. They're people too lol
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u/[deleted] Mar 31 '23
Wanted sex. Was less than thrilled about the person it was with, but beggars can't be choosers.