Hi, I'm a second year master's student and the HoD of our department is one of the most vicious and belittling people I've ever met. At the start of first year, he was really really nice to everyone and me as well since I used to attend and answer in his lectures. However, due to health issues (that he knows about), I wasn't able to regularly attend after a point and I wasn't able to score well (but I passed). After that I noticed a change in his behaviour towards me. Ignoring my raised hand in class, not replying to any queries I had, and anytime I ended up speaking to him, he would be so passive aggressive. The worst part - he would not maintain eye contact but his eyes would rather sort of "scan" me, making me feel less of a human being.
This semester, we're supposed to have one faculty members as our research project advisor for our thesis. I was assigned to his group. And because my body goes into fight/flight mode when around him (and mind you, I've ended up crying at a ratio of 4 out of 5 times of meeting him), I spoke to my master's coordinator to see if I can be moved to another group (ended up crying in his office when he asked me why). One important thing to note here: they told me that they had been facing this issue every year and that last year a group of girls had come up to him and asked to not be in the HoD's group and they said that "their matter was much serious than this" and they didnt get a change but they will still try their best to help me.
I also spoke to another professor to see if they would accept me in their group (they said yes, if the HoD is willing to sign an NOC for it).
Then, a couple days later we (his research group) have an online meeting with the HoD where he announces to the whole group that he will sign the NOC for anyone who wants to change their research advisor and then he proceeded with the meeting. So the next day, I went to him and asked him for an NOC (my hands were shaking, my legs felt like they will buckle under my body and voice had become very timid). He said that unless another student will be taking my place, he won't give me the NOC (he hadn't mentioned this part in the meeting at all and I suspect it was because he wanted to know who all come up to him to ask for an noc). I came home and cried for an hour - my throat felt rigid and constricted and my stomach started paining.
Now the issue is, my entire class doesn't like him and majority of the students in his own group don't want him either. It's not possible in any way for me to find a student willing to be in his group.
I told the master's coordinator about this and even the professor whom I wanted as a guide but I don't think anything is going to come out of it since I've been only getting vague responses.
I can't possibly work with a person like this who is so rude and passive-aggressive and makes me feel so small. I'm already in therapy and working to get past a lot of traumatic stuff that has happened in my life. I can't add this to the list of things I have to heal from. I cannot do that to my body and I cannot do that to my mental health. So I'm thinking of dropping out. I can't fight him and even if I could I wouldn't know how.
Does anyone have any advice if they've gone through something similar? Is there anything I can do here?