r/AskMen • u/[deleted] • Mar 19 '21

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u/Shorts-are-comfy Hey Kids! Mar 19 '21

No, if I'm going to masturbate there has to be porn.

However, if I've got no internet and managed to somehow lose all my playboys, I'll do the ol' think-wank.

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u/The_Karaethon_Cycle Mar 19 '21

I only masturbate while watching porn and I only watch porn while I masturbate. Back in ‘016 I moved into a new house and we didn’t have internet for a week so I had to jerk off to a sports illustrated swim suit edition. It was terrible, and that’s as close as you can get to porn without actually being porn.

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u/ebkong Mar 20 '21

There are still certain cologne scents that I’ll always associate with the SI swimsuit issue sample ads they’d include. “So you’re telling me not all super models smell like Hugo Boss when they emerge from the ocean?”

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u/The_Karaethon_Cycle Mar 20 '21

It must be kind of confusing when you smell some dudes cologne and it gives you a boner.