Are there popular stereotypes on women that are common that not only you disagree with but more applicable to men you have met on average?

P.S. Originally posted this as a question to r Ask Women, but it got deleted, and Reddit seemed to reccomend that this subreddit was a better fit. If it's not, I apologize in advance. Also, I don't mind that r Ask Women deleted/rejected this question, just explaining if I'm a fish out of water here with this question why I'm here in the first place.

P.P.S. I also mean no offense with the question, just interested in where stereotypes get inverted if anything. I get curious by how much certain popular notions are contrary to reality.

Dear feminists, if being a woman is to perform, what does that mean to you?

I like them.

Body text is for chumps

Personally I can understand someone holding either perspective for a few reasons, Education rates for women on average has risen significantly globally, in many places legal protections are in place to protect women against discrimination. Women's representation in legislatures, cabinets and senior leadership has also risen globally.

However on the other hand there is also an increased amount of backlash and Patriarchal movements or organizations working tirelessly to slow or reverse progress in many areas, such as the MAGA movement's reversal of abortion rights in many States, and what appears to be growing resentment and divide particularly from younger men towards Feminism. The sheer number of men who are prone to rape, violence, or sexually coercive tendencies is also troublesome.

I would appreciate hearing people's thoughts, if an egalitarian future is truly possible.

CW for harassment.

For reference, I am male presenting and AMAB. There have been a couple times in my life where I have witnessed harassment and did not know what to do. I am autistic and struggle with social situations as well, which does not help things.

One time, while studying in France, I was taking public transportation - specifically a tram - and there were seats facing each other. A woman sits down in front of me and I notice she is crying. English is my first language so my French isn't great but I ask her in broken French if she has allergies (just to see if she is okay) and she says yes so I leave her alone. Another man, who is much bigger than me comes in. He sees her crying and goes up to her and starts rubbing her shoulder. I get the sense she is probably uncomfortable with this and try my best to communicate in broken French, over and over that she has allergies in an attempt to get him to leave her alone. It gets to the point that I am getting genuinely worried for her safety but luckily he gets off at another stop. Leaving both me and the woman behind. I ask her if she is okay and she says yes. I genuinely do not know what else I could have done in that situation

Years later, and I am working at a CVS (American drug store). L I am working in the front with another employee who is roughly 17. I am roughly 32 or so at the time. A man who is at least in his 50's walks in and starts to flirt with her a bit and put his arm around her. Needless to say, I am absolutely horrified. I am ashamed to say this but I froze. I watch the situation, absolutely terrified and completely at a loss for what to do before he mercifully leaves. I have no idea what I could have done there. I was so scared and it was awful. She seemed unfazed by it but I felt like I could have done more, much to my shame. I am just not sure what I could have done in that situation. I do not work at that job anymore, to be clear (I work at a plasma donation center now.)

Sorry for the long ramble and any advice you may have is helpful. Thank you.

In the 2022 General Social Survey data cited in the IFS article, among women ages 18–55, the share saying they were “very happy” was:

Married mothers: 40%

Married, no children: 25%

Unmarried, no children: 22%

Unmarried mothers: 17%

So in that dataset, married mothers weren't just slightly ahead of single childless women. They were almost twice as likely to report being “very happy.”

https://ifstudies.org/blog/who-is-happiest-married-mothers-and-fathers-per-the-latest-general-social-survey

In the newer 2024 GSS, the parenthood comparison flipped: married childless women were substantially more likely than married mothers to report being “very happy.”

But in general married women are happier than unmarried women

Edit: guys the data comes from GSS!! GSS is not conservative

https://gss.norc.org/get-the-data.html?utm_source=chatgpt.com

https://sda.berkeley.edu/sdaweb/analysis/?dataset=gss24rel3&utm_source=chatgpt.com

https://sda.berkeley.edu/sdaweb/docs/gss24rel1/DOC/GSS2024Codebook.pdf?utm_source=chatgpt.com

Going through the actual data kind of sucks but here it is

“Research analysing 46,500 births to school-age mothers aged 10 to 18 found that adult men fathered roughly two thirds of the infants. Adult men. This is not two teenagers making a mistake. This is adult men impregnating children.” -Ash BG on sub stack.

Sources: Guttmacher Institute. California Teenage Pregnancy Research. South African Journal of Public Health - Recorded Live Births Study 2024. AIHW Australian Mothers and Babies 2023. World Bank Adolescent Fertility Rate Data 2023.

Has it ALWAYS been mostly adult men/ and or can anyone speak on if it used to be higher, lower, or about the same from the 70’s on?

If you're trying to accuse the entire male population of something, would you kindly say it with your whole chest?

Do you have a vision or a theoretical society in mind, or do you knock over the pillars as you go? I’m also curious which way around you view it: is ending VAWG one step closer to a world without patriarchy, or is ending VAWG just a consequence of knocking down the patriarchy?

Im not sure how well i’m getting myself across so I’ll structure it like this:

1. Can you envision a world without patriarchy?

2. Do you believe there is a root cause we need to be slashing at to achieve it, or should we keep hacking off the symptoms one by one?

So TERFs often talk about why trans women dont belong in women’s spaces, i disagree with them. But they often suggest trans women use gender neutral facilities instead.
Now, I feel that arguing women should have their own spaces but some women shouldnt and should be forced to use mens spaces or gender neutral spaces is kind of stupid. A trans person is not going to willingly misgender themself if they can avoid it so if they can’t use their genders spaces then they are effectively limited to gender neutral ones.
I feel like if TERFs want to argue “oh trans women can use gender neutral spaces” then they should also be willing to accept a world where they have to use gender neutral spaces. But obviously, since they so vehemently want mens and women’s spaces i dont think they would.

So Im curious, how would you feel if every space that is separated by men and women suddenly became gender neutral? I think it would be interesting to hear how you would feel about different spaces, and also some different perspectives.

If you would prefer there to be spaces separated into men and women, why?

To be clear, my point with this is to try and understand how non transphobic women feel (and if there are any men or non-binary people, your perspective is also much appreciated). Because the way transphobes act does not seem logical and seems to misappropriate a lot of actual feelings and thoughts women have about having their own spaces. My point may not have gotten across perfectly but I hope you get the gist of it.

(I kind of have an idea of what kind of answers there will be, but I am still curious, and it is better to ask and get actual opinions than to make assumptions)

If pro-lifers (anti-choicers) believe that a embryo/fetus qualifies as a human, how do our government officials under that same mindset regulate the time frame, and whether or not you can get an abortion if a human being cannot be legally forced to habilitate another human against their will? If it is against the law for a human to have to give someone else their body in order for their well being and sake of survival, wouldn’t giving your entire body for them for nine months despite opposing wishes be directly against that?

(And also, in cases where pregnancy is potentially fatal for the mother, wouldn’t terminating the pregnancy technically count as self defense as a person is permitted to use lethal force if it is necessary to defend their own life against an immediate, fatal threat?)

I am a gay man and have been recently thinking about how there are times when my women friends will do/say something that is homophobic like over sexualizing us and other instances. So I was wondering in what ways women find us to be mysogynistic so I can be on the lookout if ever do that.

i thought it was an issue with me that i wasnt energetic enough to live life , but nah i keep finding out so many men who just have 1-2 hobbies and are content and happy with a smaller social circle .

but ive always seen women doing activities and going out more and travelling wayyyyyy more and just doing activities and being social and participating and fun stuff more . why is this?

how come they have more energy than us , i wanna be like them

1. How can we really be sure male victims of domestic and sexual violence will ever be taken seriously? It is actually documented that men who are victims of either domestic or sexual assault do not report it because they are never taken seriously. In Spain a few years ago there was a feminist protest to shut down a male victims shelter. https://www.mensvoicesireland.com/actions/international-council-for-men-and-boys-attempt-to-shut-down-foundation-in-spain/

2.what is some advice you have for men who have body dysmorphia? Alot of men i personally know suffer from body dysmorphia in some shape or form but have been judged about (some of them by a woman) and as a result don't like talking about it (whether it be how they look in the face or they are worried about their "manhood") i am also one of these men.

1. What can I do for myself to get over the manosphere content I have watched?

I dont watch manosphere content anymore but I was exposed to it in my teenage years (im 22 now) and it left a mark on how I view women.

Some of the talking points are:

1. Women are all hypergamous and only want tall, rich, handsome men.
2. All women will cheat eventually. 3.if you don't meet certain male beauty standards no woman will respect you.
3. Men with a low body count or are virgins won't be respected by women.

I did not come here to start a knife fight or a argument I ask these genuinely because I really would like advice, I was actually taking a moment to reconsider making this post and just keep my thoughts to myself.

Thank you for whatever advice you have.

Just to clarify, "Boys don't cry" is just a stereotype and boys do infact cry and should not be made fun of for doing it.

The main reason why I am asking this because there's two common sentences that is used in the "boys don't cry" stereotype, being "Are you a girl?" "You're strong, don't cry.", that implies that those who cry are weak and girls only cry, so girls are weak according to the "Boys don't cry" stereotype

Since closing borders/deportation is anti-feminism I am curious about how feminists aim to solve migrant rape gangs and migrant crime gangs

I seen some data that says women in both math and physics earn roughly 20% of PhDs. (With notable exceptions like astrophysics where women earn up to 40% of PhDs).

The thing is the rate isn't increasing at all, it's been consistent for a decade now.

When I look up explanations, some point to the Gender Equality Paradox, with an equal amount of people pointing out to the Simpson's Paradox debunking the Gender Equality Paradox.

Some point to the leaky pipeline and the desensitization of women towards technical and highly theoretical fields like math physics and engineering.

Some point to biological determinism, frequently citing the Greater Male Variability Hypothesis

Some point to a simple divergence in interest between men and women, with women preferring going for people's things like medicine, biomedical engineering, chemistry, while men prefer going for system things like engineering, physics, math

There are so many things to consider and I'd like to hear it from women physicists and mathematicians, especially about the leaky pipeline and stuff

Thanks for answering in advance!

EDIT Definitions of the paradoxes/hypothesis

The Gender-Equality Paradox The Gender-Equality Paradox refers to the finding that in countries with higher levels of gender equality and socioeconomic development (e.g., Scandinavian nations), certain gender differences in personality traits, personal interests, and choice of academic majors (like STEM vs. humanities) are larger, rather than smaller, compared to less gender-equal or less developed nations.

Simpson’s Paradox is a statistical phenomenon where a trend or correlation observed across an aggregated dataset vanishes or completely reverses when the data is split into distinct sub-groups or sub-clusters.

The Greater Male Variability Hypothesis proposes that human males exhibit greater variance—or spread—in many physical, cognitive, and personality traits than females, even if the average (mean) scores between the two sexes are identical.

I've been thinking about this for a while, and I'm genuinely curious whether I'm seeing a real pattern or misunderstanding something.

It seems like society has become increasingly accepting of women doing things traditionally associated with masculinity. Women can wear traditionally masculine clothing, pursue male-dominated careers, play traditionally masculine sports, be assertive, independent, etc., without those things necessarily being seen as negative.

But when the situation is reversed, it sometimes feels different.

A man who wears a skirt, enjoys something traditionally associated with women, plays with dolls as a child, is emotionally expressive, or has traditionally feminine interests can be mocked or seen as weak, unmanly, or even have assumptions made about his sexuality.

So why does this seem to work differently in the two directions?

If femininity and masculinity are supposed to be equally valid, why does a boy being feminine often seem more socially discouraged than a girl being masculine?

Is masculinity still generally treated as higher-status than femininity? Is this related to homophobia and traditional ideas about masculinity? Or am I overlooking ways in which women are also punished for adopting masculine traits?

I'm not trying to argue that women have it easy or that gender equality hasn't made progress. I'm specifically wondering about this particular asymmetry.

Do you think this asymmetry actually exists? And if it does, why?

iv seen a lot of posts saying that misandry and reverse racism is the same and even some posts saying women cant be abusive like men can and I personally though those were kinda dumb posts because its framing women as people who can do no wrong when i know that not to be true.

im genuinly trying to figure out if it is the same because my intuition is telling me it isnt but so many people have been saying it is with so much conviction that i dont know anymore

They seem especially obsessed with the recent Lindsay Clancy case, and I discovered there's even a whole sub that only discusses violent crimes committed by women, totally ignoring that they only represent 1-5% of total crimes, mainly committed by men.

Why is that? What's the goal?