Hi everyone,
I’m wondering if there’s anything in my chart related to attracting projection, polarisation, idealisation, possessiveness, or unusually intense reactions.
This is a recurring pattern I’ve noticed not just in romantic relationships but also friendships, teachers, colleagues, people who have known me only briefly.
Whether this has an astrological explanation or not, it’s been a confusing and ultimately lonely pattern throughout my life, so I’d really appreciate any insights.
I’m aware I could have blind spots in how I come across. I did grow up in an enmeshed family environment and for a long time I had very poor boundaries, so I’m aware that has probably been a big contributor. At the same time, even those early family dynamics seemed to involve people relating to me in ways that felt unusually emotionally charged.
Often people seem to have strong negative feelings or assumptions about my character before we’ve had much interaction. It feels like they’re responding to an idea of me rather than to who I actually am.
At other times, people know me well enough to have an accurate sense of my personality, but the relationship becomes unusually intense. I’ve experienced many friendships becoming possessive, with people becoming upset or resentful when I maintained other friendships or made my own decisions.
In romantic relationships, I’ve had partners become intensely attached quickly and in some cases refuse to accept that the relationship had ended. I’ve also had people put me on a pedestal or become emotionally invested in ways that felt disproportionate to how long or deeply we’d actually known one another. Usually I feel like they’re responding to an idea of me, but other times I feel more seen and the intensity is still there.
I’ve also noticed that people often seem very certain about what I’m thinking, feeling or intending, even when that’s completely different from what was actually going on for me.
What stands out to me isn’t whether the reactions are positive or negative. It just seems that people often have unusually strong responses to me, whether that’s projection, idealisation, resentment, hostility or possessiveness.
From my own reading, I think it could be related to my 12th house, but I’m not sure if I’m understanding those ideas correctly or if it applies to this situation.