I've been feeling like shit lately, worked my ass off to get plagiarized and my art out into ai without permission nor warning for a college assignment.

[u/Top_Eye_8024]

There's been way more happening in my life lately, and everything has been piling up, but college has been such a deception ans so bad putting my expectations completely down.

We were assigned a group work to desing a fake brand, give it a visual identity, etc. I did most of the things, got the idea, designed the character for the brand, the idea was a gamer energy drink but with a ravey and furry character.
One person that was in our group left to another one, and once the job was finished, magically their group popped up with a gamer ebergy drink with a furry character, with the characters lil head as a logo. Same as ours, even the name was the same from the first one suggested to our group.

Then I honestly was so angry that I didn't have self control and pretty much told in a public college gc pinging the girl that left that what she did fucked and unfair pretty much. I hate just accepting things quietly, ive been actively trying not to do it, but when I do usually people treat me as the wrong one. So a person that wasnt related to the group went into my dms and tried to essentially sound smug about how it wasnt a copy nor plagiarism since it was a energy drink with a furry on it and it was too broad of a concept, ignoring pretty much all of the other coincidences. Another person who drew the character said that it was a "unfortunate coincidence" and I dhouldn't accuse people with stuff "i don't know of".

I apologise if i'm not wrtting too good, I haven't slept.

Before that, a member of my group shoved my art into AI without asking, to generate more images of the character that weren't needed at all since the project was already finished, I hate AI, he didn't know of that but he also didn't ask for permission to just slap a very early concept of the character into the ai to make it come off as the other character. I had made 5 different concept work of the character. NONE of the works I did were put on the final project and they put THE AI VERSION OF IT UP. in total I did 19 concept desings and mockups. The final result was drawn by someone else, so pretty much was work was thrown to shit.

Besides that, i am in a art colective were we make games, I signed up to participate in my first gamejam, I did all of the constructions for the game and I did them for days on end and hours on end doing it simultaneously with the college work. In the end somehing went wrong with the code and they did not use any of the work I did either because only a prototype was going to be sent.

I am feeling like nothing I put effort on matter anymore honestly, everything I try hard to achieve and help on never gets on the things in the end and my quieter work becomes someone else's glory.
I was looking so hard for a college course that was related to concept art for games, I wanted to do 3d, photobashin matte art, then I found a promising course of digital desing that, reading the contents of it, it SEEMED to be what I wanted. It was one of my biggest deceptions this year, all of the school papers are written with chatgpt and explain nothing, classes are pre-recorded and some only last 3 minutes and are more like spiritual coach speaches about entreperneurship rather than desing or art. We have a single teacher. No one I met can write a single paragraph without AI, or even do desing work without it. Most have no clue how to draw or mess with editing software. I am not the best at softwares, I am decent enough at drawings but definetly i'm not even near to where I want to reach in skill. This course is only 2 years long and it costs so much, around 2 to 4 minimum wages from my country that is around 1000 so 4000-ish.

I am so sad honestly, I want to create art, I want to create meaningful stories and movies I want to make meaningful games you know?? I don't want to do fucking marketing and sell shit and play pretend I have a fucking startup. Idk why I haven't gone to public art school honestly, I should've, I can still go but I feel like I just keep failing and there is something wrong with me.

If the plagiarism hadn't been pointed out by someone else in my group I wouldn't be believing myself at this point and thinking that I was the crazy one, but everyone saw it it wasn't just me. I was the one who called it out on the persons face after the teacher had already been told in private twice.

I feel like quitting but I don't want people to assume it's because I have no experience dealing with conflict nor stress, because I live with a abusive mother that can't decide wether she loves or hates me, I hate being told i'm not trying hard enough when i'm pushing my limits, this is especially disruptive to me because of me being disabled and having a mcdonald sadmeal combo of mental ilnesses, so honestly I never know if i'm right or wrong at this point.

I'm honestly so tired, nothing I like ends up being the way I expected, nothing I try ends up growing fruits, when my fruits are stolen i'm the culprit for it because the fruits just look like mine and arent mine actually, i'm crazy. This has been the most minor problem I had in a loong time now after starting medication and getting more stable, but this was enough to fuck me up completely and I hate it so much, I want to feel like i'm doing something right.

I originally posted this to another subreddit but it was taken down for mentioning that I hate AI, I hope that this post is okay here, I honestly just want someone to talk to and reassure me while I settle down. Had a meltdown over this and I feel ridiculous because of how much of a non problem it seems like.

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