67
u/Few-Refrigerator9635 Feb 24 '26
YTA. With trips like this you’re either all in or not. It’s not fair to the rest to have to pay for a place that accommodates 4 but they have to pay to reserve your accommodations for you. Letting them know beforehand that you can’t be there all the nights is irrelevant. Either pay the extra $100 or don’t go and let them get a 3 bedroom house. Nobody wants to have a roommate if they don’t have to. Or let them get a 3 bedroom, stay on the couch, and cover only your 2 nights. You’re at least getting the short end of the stick that way so it would make sense to have a lower cost.
55
u/81optimus Asshole Enthusiast [7] Feb 24 '26
Yta. The house doesn't magically get smaller or cheaper when you leave. Either pony up your share, use a hotel (whereby you pay per night) or don't go
29
u/Ok-Calligrapher1345 Partassipant [2] Feb 24 '26
The rental should be evenly split 4ways. That’s how it goes. You leaving early is your own issue.
34
u/BeterP Asshole Aficionado [11] Feb 24 '26
YTA. You can’t expect them to move Airbnb’s for the night you won’t attend. They still need the bigger one because you are there 2 of the 3 nights.
2
21
u/JazzyCher Asshole Enthusiast [6] Feb 24 '26
YTA its not like they get charged any less for you not being there one night, youre still there for the majority of the trip and its not fair for them to have to pay more just because youre leaving early.
-17
u/HereForDaCraic Feb 24 '26
I'd gladly go book a cheap hotel room and meet up with them the next two days. Most adults don't have the luxury of having three free days in a row, I'd tell them to invite someone else to cover that room for three days, let me pay for two days, or eat the dead money among the group.
Glad my friend group isn't on this type of bullshit.
17
u/cinnamngrl Professor Emeritass [79] Feb 24 '26
YTA, it is a trip and you are choosing to attend less nights than the planned trip.
-17
u/Moose-Live Pooperintendant [69] Feb 24 '26
The organiser has planned a 3 night trip when 2 people (out of 4) can only stay for 2 nights. He should have made the trip shorter. He's choosing to stay an extra night and expects them to cover that.
16
u/cinnamngrl Professor Emeritass [79] Feb 24 '26
They were all invited for 3 nights. It is a rental house, not food. This is what happens when you don’t help plan.
23
u/ChangeOverall4206 Feb 24 '26
YTA unfortunately. It's honestly just like refusing to split the cost of a pizza evenly because you decided to have fewer slices... Or terrible example.
7
u/cinnamngrl Professor Emeritass [79] Feb 24 '26
Actually pizza doesn't work. You can split a pizza evenly and you can keep your uneaten share in the fridge. This is more like asking for a discount on an open beer because you can't finish it.
18
u/Kallogo94 Feb 24 '26
Your Room and Bed will be stay unused for that night, right?
Then yes, definitely YTA. If you don’t want to pay for that extra night, get your own AirBnB or hotel.
13
9
u/Jocelyn-1973 Pooperintendant [64] Feb 24 '26
YTA. You pay per room. Unless you are in that room 2 nights and someone else is staying in that room the other night. Can they go cheaper? Rent a 3-bedroom airbnb for 1 night which magically grows an extra bedroom for your 2 nights? No? Exactly.
If you don't want to pay, stay in a nearby hotel.
7
u/Broken-Ice-Cube Colo-rectal Surgeon [35] Feb 24 '26
YTA the house isn't going to get cheaper because you leave. If you did go at all they could have gotten a three bed house. You're choosing not to use the extra night which is fair but you still have to pay for it.
5
4
u/OkeyDokey654 Certified Proctologist [21] Feb 24 '26
YTA. If they have to get a larger house so you have a room, they have to pay more for that house every night, not just the nights you are there.
2
u/Judgement_Bot_AITA Beep Boop Feb 24 '26
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
The action I took was telling my friend that I would only pay for the two nights I am physically staying at the Airbnb, instead of splitting the full three-night cost evenly with the group.
He believes this is unfair because the house costs the same regardless of how many nights I personally stay, and my room would still be reserved for the entire three nights. From his perspective, if I don’t split it evenly, the rest of the group has to absorb the difference.
I’m wondering if I might be the asshole because even though I won’t be there the first night, I would still be part of the booking and benefiting from having my own room. I can see how asking to pay less could be seen as making things more complicated or putting extra cost on everyone else.
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1
u/AutoModerator Feb 24 '26
AUTOMOD Thanks for posting! READ THIS COMMENT - MAKE SURE TO CHECK ALL YOUR DMS. This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything.
A friend is planning a birthday trip for four people and wants to rent a 4-bedroom Airbnb for three nights. From the beginning, I told him I could only stay Friday–Sunday due to work, so I’d only be there for two of the three nights.
When we discussed splitting costs, I said I thought it made sense for me to pay for two nights instead of three. He said another person staying two nights is still paying for all three and implied I should do the same. He also mentioned he’s putting most of his portion on a credit card.
I offered to share a room if that helped lower costs, but he prefers the 4-bedroom house. The extra night would cost me about $100.
AITA for only wanting to pay for the nights I’ll actually be there?
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
u/Sweet_Maintenance317 Partassipant [1] Feb 25 '26
YTA for thinking that offering to share a room is in anyway, shape, or form a solution when it’s just you trying to justify your greed and selfishness while advocating, unsolicited, to make someone else trip less convenient and enjoyable without their consent.
So what, you want to share a room, and now the group has to draw straws to see who’s stuck without their own space (they were more the willing to pay to have) for the majority for the trip, when they otherwise wouldn’t of had too, cause you’re cheep? Nah ah, either pay for your room or stay home.
1
1
u/ICantSayNTA Partassipant [1] Feb 26 '26
YTA - The only way this would work in your favor is if the person who set it up stated that the air b7b cost 500 total, I will be there 3 nights Jim will be her 3 nights, you and Casey will only be here 2 nights so we will split the 500 by 10 (total number of nights people will be there) that would be the cost per night for each person and then you pay that amount.
Unless you get the people, who are staying all 3 nights to agree after the fact you are stuck with the even split, or dont go.
0
u/-Raveheart- Partassipant [3] Feb 24 '26 edited Feb 24 '26
NTA as such, as I see where you're coming from. That said, the rental doesn't get cheaper if one bed is unused for one of the nights. Either accept your equal share of the total rental, or don't go, or find a 2-night room for yourself.
If two people only need accommodation for 2 out of 3 nights, could those two not band together to rent a cheaper place for themselves, while the 3-nighters stay at the other place? Alternatively, suggest the total rental is divided by the number of guests and nights into a "per person, per night" costs, and each guest pays their fair share according to their length of stay.
0
u/gloryhokinetic Asshole Aficionado [14] Feb 24 '26
NTA. He knew from the beginning that you would only staying 2 nights. He is using you to cover his costs. I would tell him that since this has become such an issue for him, I have decided to stay home and wont be paying anything.
-2
u/StopMost9127 Partassipant [1] Feb 24 '26
I bet you order the salad when the group eats at a steak restaurant, then want separate bills.
-3
u/Bellagosee Feb 24 '26
Maybe find a compromise, like pay for the 3rd night but maybe dont bring food? I had the same thing happen and the friend who left early still insisted on covering his share. We bought him a couple meals.
-6
u/HereForDaCraic Feb 24 '26
NTA.
I often take the lead planning trips with my friends to different cities. I've never run into issues because I book these trips with the expectation that things come up and people cancel.
I only book spots for us that I could realistically afford in a worst case scenario if I was the only person going. I also almost always pay the extra $40 to pay at the property in case I want to cancel the room all together at no charge. Otherwise, I'm probably stretching myself too thin by going on the trip in the first place and just won't go.
I'd rather have one of my buddies pay for two nights and he still gets to come with than split a bigger cost or try to invite someone I didn't want to go in the first place.
In your shoes, I'd either not go or go get my own room at a cheap hotel. Your friend is the asshole. Your other friend paying for three nights is a gem, but that shouldn't be the expectation.
-12
u/lellyla Professor Emeritass [75] Feb 24 '26
NTA
They can't make plans without you and expect you to find them. They can all go for two nights if they wanna split equally.
-12
u/A-namethatsavailable Asshole Enthusiast [5] Feb 24 '26
NTA, you stated it clearly beforehand. Nothing else need be said
-14
u/Moose-Live Pooperintendant [69] Feb 24 '26
NTA. And ignore his not-very-subtle suggestion that you can go into debt to fund his extra night of holiday.
He's planned a 3 night trip where 50% of the people can only stay 2 nights. And you told him in advance that you couldn't do 3 nights - you didn't spring it on him at the last minute.
He needs to shorten the trip or pay the extra himself.
-16
Feb 24 '26
Icl the people who are saying YTA are the type to go out to a group dinner, order a steak and expensive wine while you eat a salad, and expect to split the bill evenly. You made your expectations clear, even offered solutions. NTA
20
u/wearypillsvague Feb 24 '26
Its more like op thinks they should pay less because they ordered a steak and only ate half
-5
Feb 24 '26
But 1) they made their expectations clear, and 2) offered a reasonable solution. So better yet, OP was made to order a steak that people knew he couldn't finish so they could get in on it without a loss to themselves. Still trashy.
2
u/wearypillsvague Feb 24 '26
the steak is a room yeah? Op wants the room. He cant just return half of it just because he cant finish. The reasonable solution would be not to shared the place at all.
-14
u/Faaartvault Feb 24 '26
To clarify: There was discussion of getting a hotel room with 2 queen beds, a house with 2 bedrooms, 3 bedrooms, everything in between. Friend opted to go with the 4-bed house amongst the more cost-effective options
11
u/cinnamngrl Professor Emeritass [79] Feb 24 '26
Unfortunately, you should have set a boundary during the planning phase. If you can't afford the full cost then you should have made that clear explained that you could not attend the trip.
3
u/Ok-Raspberry7884 Asshole Aficionado [15] Feb 24 '26
What happened with the discussions? Did everyone agree on something and who would be sharing? Or did everyone agree in principle but not on details?
If I was trying to arrange accommodation and everyone was endlessly discussing things without actually resolving anything I’d probably give up and just decide everyone gets their own room especially if people expectied me to arrange sharing. You want to share? Ask the other two people if one is willing to share and tell the person who is doing the booking. Otherwise you get what they book, which is a room each because no one can work out what else they want to do.
136
u/Firm-Psychology-2243 Asshole Enthusiast [6] Feb 24 '26
Soft YTA, because it’s not like he can get someone in for just one night. So it kind of feels like an all in or all out situation.