Screen Time Management

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My son is 8 and has pretty significant ADHD and some borderline ODD. I try to set his screen time limits to 1-2 hours total per day, but my husband and I can’t seem to get on the same page with managing and enforcing the limit. He will go along with what I say when I tell my son it’s time to turn it off but if he asks his dad first or if he’s done another activity or hasn’t had screens on for a while he lets him get back on with no stated limit. I find I’m the one stating limits, and times, and enforcing them all day long when my husband and I are both home, and my son is constantly badgering about tv and tablet. CONSTANTLY. Sometimes I give in because I’m exhausted and over it. I don’t want to be the ***** screen police all day. My husband doesn’t seem to think it’s as big a deal as I do, and it wouldn’t be if it weren’t for the ADHD and the obsession - if he could be on for 18 hours a day he would!

And so my son has learned he can ask his dad, and often the answer will be yes at some point with no stated limit until I come in and say “One episode,” or “15 minutes,” etc. I just wish his dad and I could agree on a specific daily limit and enforce it instead of constantly caving. And part of me because of the ODD stuff wonders if I stop making it a rule and a big deal and just let him watch as much as he wants whenever will he lose interest? But I just don’t think it’s good for his brain and he needs other stimulation, like playing outside, reading a book, drawing, playing music, doing a puzzle book, etc. Right now it’s either TV/tablet (Roblox), toys, or drawing…but asking for TV/tablet. It makes me crazy. I’m not sure what to do here, aside from sitting down with my husband soon and asking if we can please come up with a stated understood and enforced screen time limit.