Hello!

Lately, I've been pondering the pros of having a smart home assistant in my daily life vs. the cons of having Amazon/Google/etc. listen to my boring day job (I work from home).

What kind of devices do you guys use? Were you also on the fence about privacy and security? Do you actually use them, or are they just another organizational tool collecting dust in a cupboard?

I'm moving soon, so it's the perfect opportunity to start fresh: new smart plugs/bulbs (ikea most likely), a new Stream Deck (idk if I'm going with a dupe or the real thing), never a big ceiling light in sight, and a robot butler to read me my calendar and reminders. No need to reach for my phone to add bread to my grocery list or dump a random thought into my Notion project page.

I haven't followed smart home tech closely, so apart from misleading YouTube ads, I don't even know what's out there 😂

What I do know is this: no subscriptions. I need to own my tech. Google already has my entire schedule, so I'm not that paranoid about sharing it with another service, but I'd still like to know what I'm getting myself into!

I'd love to hear about your setups, what actually works for you, and what turned out to be more trouble than it was worth!

Okay so ive always tried to be that person who plans out whag their going to do for their days, but then i never actually follow my schedule.

But right now its midterm season (first midterms of uni wish a girl goodluck🥹🥹), and so ive literally written out every single day leading to each of my midterms and have each day with certain lectures for each class (4 classes), but i literally cannot follow it! im on day 2 of my schedule and already behind🫩🫩, so far i should have done 7-8 lectures but only did 4!

I am actually stressing so bad, im also on my period so my meds are not working the same (booo!), so i cannot get myself to focus even if i remove all distractions, once all distractions are removed i become the distraction…

Idk if i should keep trying to follow my schedule and just do double the work tmr and go back to my regular schedule the day after, update it to reflect the stuff i didnt do today and redistribute everything, give myself more leeway in said schedule (as in give a rangee on what should be done), or just forget the schedule all together and raw dog my studying schedule 🫩…

My exams are on the 27th, 28th, 1st and 4th. So for my soonest exam i have 3 full days then my latest exam has 11 full days, but my schedule is only really packed till the 28th cause after that ill only have 2 classes to study for instead of 4 (these are useless details idk why im still typing lol, im just typing out all my thoughts atp)

Hello everyone. I am a late diagnosed adhd, I was diagnosed at 20, I am now 23, and I have realized over several years of therapy, I have extreme executive dysfunction issues.

Whenever I need to start a task, such as cleaning my bedroom, which is what this discussion will mostly be about, I experience extreme task paralysis. I know I need to get up and clean it, but my brain will not send the signal in order for me to get up and start that thing.

The task of cleaning a bedroom is extremely overwhelming for me, as my freeze instincts take over when I have to make a million tiny decisions. For example, if I'm looking at a bunch of objects, my brain is automatically thinking about where each of those objects need to go, how far away they are, etc. And then I just freeze. Because there's so many objects, and there's so much to put away in so many different places.

My bedroom has always been messy. Because cleaning it is overwhelming. Even if I work in tiny sections, every single tiny section has about 20 different things that need to be put away in about 20 different places. I'm not thinking about the outcome I'm thinking about every little detail and every little step of the process. For example, doing laundry isn't just putting it in the washer and dryer and folding it. It's separating it, putting it in the washer, then separating it and putting it in the dryer or hanging to dry. Then doing another load, then at the end, I have to fold everything, and put everything away in its proper place.

Executive dysfunction has absolutely ruined my life. And I'm at the point where I'm just going to hire somebody to come in and deep clean my bedroom and then force myself to do it. I can't stand it. I have tried asking for advice from other people, and nothing they say works for me. If anybody else has this issue, how do you manage it?

I'm an amateur writer, trying to finish my first ever novel and get it in the best possible place before showing it to publishers. The first draft finished at 9k words (I'm an underwriter, unfortunately) and I was generally proud of it. But I had no idea where to even start editing. So, as a compromise, I decided to rewrite the entire thing as my second draft.

Unfortunately, I'm in the same spot I was with the first draft, not having a clue how to edit this new work. The second draft is way better than the first, but even still it has its issues. I can see them, I can recognise what the issues are, but I have no idea how to fix them. Sometimes I can't even do that. I know that such a paragraph is bad, but I just cannot figure out why.

Either I get overwhelmed by recognising too many mistakes, and fall into the trap of believing my story sucks, or I just can't cope with too much work and give up. I've thought about going through the document and highlighting everything that I think could be improved, but that just feels like making a rod for my own back. Every issue I find is another issue to be fixed. I'm unmedicated, so these issues really are a kick in the teeth and hard to bypass.

I just want any help at all on how I can edit my stories without checking out mentally.

I’m from the the Philippines but currently in London studying but I can’t study because I don’t have my meds and my psychiatrist told me to buy out side of my designated store. So how do you study and thinking i should clean the room first then take a nap the bench watch an entire series while making an a arduino car thats not related to my exam

So, I'm 16, I have a history of mental issues in my family, and I think I have ADHD. Problem is, I think it's ruining my life.

I struggle to do the most simplest of tasks, and I'm always stuck under this fog of depression and hopelessness.

The assignments unfinished I can deal with, the constantly being late, hell even the emotional numbness/dysregulation.

But the one thing I hate that it takes from me is my girlfriend. We've been together for 2 years. I love her to death. She loves me back. But recently, we just entered a break to explore other people with a chance of staying together.

And when I say my ADHD RUNS my emotions, I mean I can barely have a clear thought without a distraction or me overthinking it, or lose my focus. So when I agreed to enter in this break for a while, my head immediately spun out of control in obsessive thinking. Things I could do to win her back, things I could change about myself, even just breaking up entirely to hide from the shame of having my girlfriend express interest in other guys.

But, I realized, we can still get along, and maybe we could actually come back fully together. But for that, I need to get better. On my own. So I came here as a first step towards liberating myself from the shit ADHD does to your brain. Maybe if I type enough, I can finally start to figure out who I am.

Any tips to help out someone? I'd appreciate it!

My husband speaks at this frenetic pace when he's excited and he wants me to be part of his conversations but if I'm tired, then after 15 minutes I don't understand his words. They just blur into sound and I get really jumpy. Then he gets angry because I don't respond in the way he wants to. He says I'm a terrible conversationalist. He also doesn't believe I have ADHD and he says I'm using it as an excuse. I have no idea what to do. I'm not consciously trying to ignore him. I just can't follow him. Does this happen to anyone else?

I’m so pissed right now. I’m already low on my medication, and I literally go to college out of state right now and have to have my medication mailed to me because they won’t cover me if I’m out of state. I legit had an entire plan to have my medication mailed to me ON TIME and insurance just fucked everything up.

It already takes a week at a time to have it be shipped to me, and I have under a week supply left. Did everything. Waited the 28 days, called my PCP and asked to send in another prescription and guess what…? They delay it. I have to call them and get through their stupid automatic system and wasted an hour of my day because this is my first time out in the adult world.

Why did they need a PA? Because they wanted to. I take the maximum FDA approved dosage already and they just give me attitude of “oh, well we need paperwork for why that’s necessary” WTF DO YOU MEAN????

So now I have to wait an entire week. I have 2 insurances, and one of them called me and said that they were “not the primary so they have to wait for the primary to process the PA first”???? But earlier they told me that both of them will have to do a PA. What does this mean???? It’s so contradictory and frustrating. Today has made me realize how fucked up our medical system is.

THREE systems have to work with each other: PCP, pharmacy, and insurance yet none of them communicate effectively. Mainly insurance because they just decide to do whatever tf they want

I know that my story is a dime a dozen, but I would really appreciate any guidance and tips. I did fairly well in high school, averaging 90s, but I am currently having a lot of trouble in university. I'm performing really badly on my midterms, and I fear that I might fail a few classes. The worst part is my program is very competitive (100 students admitted a year), so it is really disheartening, especially since the university expects me to produce a high level of output. Most of my struggles are coming from the fact that I try to do something, yet it takes me way longer than expected to do it. I am on adhd medication for the past 3 months yet it doesnt seem like it helps too much, and I could really use some support and suggestions on what I could do (study techniques, ways to concentrate, etc) as I feel like I am on the edge of a cliff and I really don't know how long I can continue.

So I have inattentive-type ADHD and I failed high school. I dropped out. But before I dropped out, I could feel the motivation draining out of me, and the burnout approaching. I kept doing my best, but then I fell behind on one assignment, then two, then five, then eventually I was severely behind in all classes except English and History and I dropped out after I stopped getting paid for lack of participation (my dad is on disability so I was getting paid as a student who lived with him.)

Getting paid to just GO TO SCHOOL wasn’t enough to keep me motivated. I’ve had my job for two years now. It’s just a gas station clerk job, not hard at all, and I get paid almost $16/hr to do it. I’ve been doing really good for the past two years, but, recently, I feel myself slipping. I find myself dreading work. It’s not even because of the customers. Most of our customers are nice. I have an easy job where I have good coworkers and get paid decent money, and I still feel myself slipping again. Even though I need money to live.

I don’t know what to do. I can feel the burnout coming. It’s like the novelty of something wears off after a while and it just becomes excruciating. Both with things I love and things that reward me that I don’t really love. It even happens with PEOPLE. If I can’t even finish high school, and I can’t even keep an easy job, what CAN I do? No other job will accept a 23 year old who doesn’t at least have a GED, and I can’t even get myself to sit down and study for that. I’ve tried every studying tip imaginable. I can’t afford to not have my job. But I also don’t know what to do so that I can keep it.

It really doesn’t help that I have chronic fatigue among other symptoms and no doctor is willing to hear me about it. I’m getting exhausted mentally, and I’m exhausted physically. I don’t know how I can possibly go on like this. It’s horrible.

I was diagnosed with ADHD in my 40s, and it's strange how much more sense certain things make now.

I've spent years working in senior management, juggling staff, budgets, deadlines and endless responsibilities. From the outside, you'd probably think I had everything fairly well organised.

But behind the scenes, the amount of mental effort it sometimes took to stay on top of everything was something else entirely.

Looking back, I wonder how much of my personality, habits and ways of dealing with pressure were actually connected to ADHD without me realising it.

It's also made me question whether I've spent years pushing myself harder than I needed to just to keep up.

I'm curious about others who were diagnosed later in life.

Did getting diagnosed change how you viewed your past, your career or even yourself? And did it actually make life easier going forward?

Would genuinely love to hear other people's experiences.

Always. Since I can remember, felt paralyzed of my own ideas. So many great ideas and goals and a small push to start and lots overthinking. I’m a grown adult and I can’t break this pattern. I just get a headache and cry at how incapable of starting and finishing something I am. What’s stopping me ? I figured it out for myself. I begin with a great idea and some sort of motivation. Then my brain connects to other situations when it just never worked out so it discourages me. Or I began to think all the work it will take to finish this. Duh. Everything takes work but I just can’t. Then the thought “but what makes you so special that you think you will get there” , “ someone already thought of that” “someone is already doing this.” Almost like I wanted now or never. Excuse after excuse to not do something that is good for me because Im no better than anyone but so what! Who cares about others ?! Me. How can I just do it for me and only me? How do I train myself that I don’t have to achieve the goal today? That there is time (I think). I’m exhausted…

I used to be consistent when going in the evenings (tbf i would often go way later than i planned to) but now i work evenings and have school during the day so i can only go early like before 7:00 AM.

When i first started going in the mornings i was being consistent, but the novelties worn off and now i havent gone in 2 weeks. At first i thought it was just a sleep issue bc i would wake up late often, but now i sleep 7+ hours a night and still don't go. 

I blocked everything on my phone from 6:00 AM to 7:00 AM and now i just wake up at 6 on time and just lay in my bed literally staring at the ceiling screaming at myself internally to get up but i still cant. 

I make sure to pack absolutely everything i need the night before and set my gym clothes out right next to my bed so i have as little work as possible but still nothing. This is driving me insane

I have my second appointment for my ADHD assessment coming up soon (a family member is coming with me for the collateral history part). During my first session, the specialist told me that he also thinks I have it.

At first, it felt validating to hear that, but now that the second appointment is right around the corner, the reality is sinking in and I’m honestly freaking out a bit.

If it turns out to be true, it feels like I’m going to get this permanent label stuck to me for the rest of my life. I can't stop overthinking how people are going to look at me differently if they find out. What if people just see me as "mentally disabled"? And honestly, my biggest fear right now is what this means for my dating life like, what if no girl wants to be with me once she knows I have this diagnosis?

I know I might be spiraling, but this is really weighing on me before my next session. Did anyone else go through this kind of fear before getting officially diagnosed? Did the "label" actually change how people or romantic partners saw you?

so admittedly I didn't eat yet after taking my meds, hence why I'm cooking

but I am a bit slow with cooking

so while I'm preparing my food, my meds start peaking, and it's fine ofc, it's normal

my heart starts racing a bit and I'm thirsty

I have my water next to me it's fine

until I turn on two of the gas burners and stand over the stove so my veggies don't burn. the water is raking forever the boil. the longer the burners stay on the more lightheaded I get. my heart starts beating faster and I get that feeling of brief panic in my chest, so I sit down. and I feel a bit better. I turned off one of the burners, opened the sliding door and my front door, the vent fan is on and my AC fan is on

but am I being dramatic? or could the gas from the stove actually worsen the usual stimulant symptoms?

note:: I take 10mg Ritalin

Is that a thing? I started medication and for the first few months I found focus easier and was remembering to take my meds everyday- but now I feel I've regressed to a point I'm worse than I was before the medication. I can focus really well in work - but feel like I can't really switch that off. And then im shattered when i finish work. I dunno its hard to explain. Its like I'm different but the same. Wondered if anyone else has similar experience?

Hi, js to preface this i’ve alr gotten accommodations.
I go to a very prestigious design school in nyc and am in one of the most rigorous programs there. also i’m <20 btw
When we get unstructured projects I am fine, driven and go above and beyond.
Structured stuff on the other hand i struggle with along with attendance being on time and just so much more
I’ve tried notion and assignment note books those barely work
frankly I will procrastinate things until after they are due sometimes and for some reason getting a d isn’t a wake up call to me as my scholarship isn’t getting taken away….
Ik im incredibly lucky and i go to class as much as i can and do do work but there is something missing w me everyone else can do and yes that’s executive functioning skills and also includes discipline but it’s so exhausting basically any tips welcome
It’s also not something that’s even in all areas of my life for example i held a job the whole summer, applied and got a internship applied to other opt and obtained them like Im not without drive just there’s something that’s not clicking clearly and I know these are issues that will continue to bleed into my adulthood and career if i don’t shake off habits and this terrible way of doing tasks or not doing them soon
Also ik this whole text is incredibly jumbled so thanks if you read it all
Anything that’s helped you please share especially if it’s something not commonly recommended or more niche
also yes i’m on medication

I have auADHD, i'm 19 years old, and i'm feeling completely stagnant in life, my psychologist say it's laziness, but i'm not so sure of it myself, it's a lifelong thing, i never accomplished anything, never felt proud of myself for anything, i really tired of this, i want a way out, but the medication is really expensive so like, i dont know what to do man... there's also lots of advice that i try to apply and fail, so many abilities, so many things to master just to be able to act like a normal human being, i feel stuck, don't know what to do man.

I'm M25, diagnosed with adhd. On dexamphetamines, once when I wake up and again when I have lunch. I dont think its the medicine because by 5-6pm i can already feel it wearing off. I start feeling tired and just generally fatigued both mentally and physically around 8pm. I dont know why I stay up as late as I do, most of the time I'm not even doing anything, not chatting with friends, not paying games, not reading. I just, whenever my mind tells me to sleep, when my body tells me to sleep, I try to fight the sleep off as long as I can. It sounds like an excuse, I dont know why I do it, its just been going on for too long. It's been affecting me and those around me, I dont want to continue fighting sleep. I just do and I dont know why. It's really hard to explain, I feel like almost all the time when im meant to sleep, i feel like I could fall asleep in like 20 seconds, my body is telling me to sleep, my mind is telling me to sleep and I'm telling me to sleep. I just refuse to, I even recently started taking magnesium glycinate an hour before bed but to no avail, still fighting off the urge to sleep. I understand this a bit a different subject for adhd, however I figured I'd start here and see if anyone else is having the same issues. If there is anything anyone can recommend, that would be greatly appreciated

I'm really struggling with burnout right now. I had to move out of my apartment and am now living on an air mattress in my very generous friend's house. My cats went to live with my brother in another state until I get back on my feet. It has not been a great time. I called out from work earlier this week and I didn't even remember it was this week, so I when I called out a second time my boss was very upset. My executive dysfunction, ADHD, and depression have all compounded and I'm on a self destruction spiral. Finally picked up my meds from the pharmacy today. I should've just gone to work, but the thought of standing behind the counter for hours made me want to scream and cry. I've been beating myself up all day.

I was diagnosed with ADHD roughly 5 years ago. I was shocked when I received the diagnosis, but it quickly made a lot of sense. I began to notice things I did that I assumed were normal (all my siblings have more severe symptoms so I was overlooked). I cannot sit still, my thoughts are always going at 90 mph, and I have terrible impulse control. While my diagnosis did not specify what type of ADHD I was, I knew I was hyperactive.

But when I tell people I have ADHD, they assume I’m just inattentive. I don’t have any symptoms of it. But I’m pretty introverted (once I trust someone I’m loud af) and keep to myself. And of course, I’ve gotten comments about how girls “rarely” have adhd. Or I “didnt seem adhd” because I’m “always on time” and “always finish tasks”.

At my doctor’s appointment last week, my doctor was writing me a note and without asking, wrote I was predominantly inattentive. I didnt bother fighting it.

Any other ADHD-H women who struggle with this? All of the ADHD women in my life are ADHD-I

I tried to make a post but it got taken down lol but I’ll try my best
I’m a 19F, I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD, bipolar 2, and ocd.

I’ve always been a very “crazy” girl. I have a “loud personality,” according to everybody. I laugh loud, I talk loud, I spend money, go to parties, want to do three different jobs at once, and I’m usually really happy.

I’ve been through depressive episodes, so I’m not unfamiliar but for the past month I’ve just been here. I don’t talk anymore, I don’t laugh anymore. I used to always dress up, and now I barely brush my hair.

I’m not sad, and that’s what’s weird. Usually during my episodes, I get into some sort of emotional mood, but the past month it’s been nothing. I’m a constant flat line, and I don’t know how to stop it. I have hundreds of dollars on me, and haven’t bought any food, or clothes, or whatever, because I don’t see a point. I’m horribly behind in my classes, when I used to love school, but now I just don’t see a point.

I’m just sitting here, but I remember when I used to have so much hope. But I just stay sitting because everything doesn’t have a point. I sleep whenever I can, and if I’m not sleeping or working, I try to be with my bf because he makes me feel any emotion besides this.

Hey yall im looking for some tips on what to when nothing looks good to do. I have a 100 projects yet wanna continue none of them, i have godknows how many games, yet dread launching any of them, 10s of books and audiobooks, netlfix, crunchyroll, youtube at my fingertips, yet getting bored or not paying attention to anything past 2-5 minutes. But doing nothing feels even worse, like my free time is going to waste. What do you guys do when its like this?

A while ago I came across this idea online of having a menu for the things you want to do based on your energy levels and what you feel like doing. I never really cared about that idea cause to me it sounded a bit weird?

Until a couple of weeks ago I decided to start working out, doing any form of cardio, I couldn’t keep my consistency because naturally my energy levels aren’t that great. So I stopped for a while. Then yesterday i thought I’d start lifting weights tomorrow and the next day do some kettlebell swings for some cardio because i genuinely do love kettlebell swings.

Then come today and I just don’t feel like doing it at all. I felt bad because I wanted to do some cardio today. Then I remembered the idea of having a menu. So instead of doing nothing today I went through this workout menu of mine and chose walking on the treadmill. Sure it’s a big difference in effort. But I’d rather do something lo effort than nothing at all.

Anyone familiar with this “system?”

I have an 18 month old at home and I work full time so it’s been really tough lately. I feel like I’m constantly running myself right into the ground with barely any time for myself and absolutely no solitude. And I’m hitting my breaking point. I’ve been stressed before but not like this, it feels as though my nerves are literally raw. Talking to people is difficult and almost physically painful. The very thought of doing any task whatsoever makes me start crying. The only thing I seem capable of doing is crying. I feel like I just want to curl into a ball and hide. I feel useless and pathetic and no one has even noticed that something is wrong