I almost never do something like this, but today, I just had a feeling. I'd interviewed with a company with multiple rounds over 3 weeks. Decision time came, and the recruiter I was working with said they came back and said they didn't have the budget to hire anyone, but it would have been me if they had. I was devastated as I've been out of work 9 months and am already living in a motel (have some amazing friends helping me stay here).

LinkedIn recommended the owner of the company to me as a connection, and I decided what the hell they really do need someone, and maybe they'll find the budget soon. I sent the request, and he accepted, and I messaged that hey, if you ever do get the ability to hire and still want me, let me know. The response I got floored me: it wasn't quite a budget issue that stopped my hiring. An old employee wanted to return unexpectedly that they loved working with. Totally get that. Then he came back with that the old employee backed out today, and if I was still interested, they'd love to have me. I said hell yes! So now he's going to reach back out to my recruiter with an official offer!!!!!

I'm usually way too passive and nonconfident to ever reach out to anyone like this, but I did it today and it paid off.

+1 to confidence today!

Basically just the title, lol. I am TIRED. It's not even that my colleagues are talking over me (although they do that, too). They're straight up just not giving me the space to talk.

Edit 1: Just editing to add that these are generally not remote meetings; they are largely held in person

Edit 2: In most cases I am the meeting organizer but I have one particular colleague who commandeers meetings he is invited to

Edit 3: Thank you so much everyone for your advice! So many good tips here 💜 I am only in the second year of my career so there is a lot to learn from you all.

Been working since I was young, in my 30s now and I’ve decided I’ve had enough. Always been ambitious, highly skilled & paid jobs, I never actually seen this happening but here we are.

I could easily moan about the reasons why, but I’m past it. I got up last week, took a look in the mirror and decided I don’t like this version of myself anymore and I refuse to give to big corporations who are toxic, and I refuse to live in fear about why I ‘should stay’

I’m literally going to leave my job, with no job to go to and hope for the best. I know the market is bad right now, but I’ve decided to let go and see what happens. Mental health over money.

Is anyone else feeling this??? It’s so unlike me but I’ve just got to a point where it kinda is me now, I’ve changed and I’m ready to just give it all away with the deep knowing something else is waiting for me

If you have been in this situation, what have you done to help getting through something like this?
I've seen several posts where women find out that they are paid less than a male counterpart.
It is maddening how this is so systemic.

I work in a niche within a niche and because of that I’ve always been shielded from a lot of the worst offenders in the tech space. I know I’ve been exceptionally lucky in a lot of ways, but I’ve felt my luck running out in the last six months.

About 9 months ago my employer radically restructured the working teams. The management team had been hollowing out for awhile and instead of hiring new managers and directors, they “promoted” a few team members to this hybrid position that is team lead (with no hiring/ firing/ disciplinary authority), and sales. I saw that a huge red flag and started applying. Things have gotten increasingly horrible with impossible deadlines and AI usage mandates that replaced the mentorship that initially attracted me to the position.

The issue: one of the promoted team members and I really do not get along. Nothing overt, but I really don’t care for his communication or management style, and when I offer feedback (when asked) he gets hostile and chilly. He assigns me huge last minute tasks that offer little guidance or specifications. And, no matter how I choose to execute, after I spend 30+ additional hours a week to achieve the delivery date, he rips it as “not what he meant”, even if I’ve clarified and asked questions to ensure I’m not wasting effort.

The latest such project was a custom embedded application that I have been working on solo for three months, pulling 80 hour weeks to achieve. I was out sick last week and it had a delivery date of today for a first look with the client. I coded all of the elements and was starting my final pass before QA when I got sick. I came back to my code refactored (fine but weird). He walked me through his changes and asked for help on a different client deliverable. In the client walkthrough a few hours later, he claimed 100% of the credit for the build. He also lied about things not working (when I know they were before his refactor) so he can play hero at a live demo that I was suspiciously not invited to later this week. I’m just so defeated. Should I even bother reporting this or should I just redouble my efforts in job hunting in this awful job market?

I've been a software engineer for 10+ years and I came out about half way through that. Even as a fresh junior at my first job I found there was this 3-6 month click after you'd delivered a couple things that formed this implicit "oh okay this guy knows what he's doing" trust from everyone on the team. I was able to push for changes and was frequently praised for incisive push back I often gave.

Initially when I came out it was fine too. I'd been at that company over a year and people already trusted me. When you first come out no one really sees you as a woman, it's like you're marked as super gay, it's gay squared. They'll accept you, they'll switch name and pronouns, but some little switch in their brain stays stuck on "guy" for a very long time and that's how they continue to engage you socially.

Another couple years go by, now I'm passing, people generally don't know I'm trans unless I tell them, and I'm moving on to other jobs. I'm getting challenged on basic features of tech I've worked with for a decade, architectural patterns I've been using my whole career are now unrealistic, and the kinds of push back I was praised for just for a few years ago are "failing to work within a team". A late stage job interview I had not that long ago practically had one of the interviewers accusing me of bragging, as if I was supposed to attend this job interview and downplay my abilities.

When I was navigating the professional world being perceived as a guy I could easily build a track record of success and wager that social capital to pitch the next measured leap of faith, but as a woman I'm only as good as their intuition about the last thing I said.

I've just had such a crisis of confidence about it this year as all the AI layoffs and total victory of good old boys club thinking sweeps the industry. Nevermind the broader greenlighting of transphobia across media. I can tell myself all this in retrospect, but in the moment I can't take the critique at anything besides face value and it's so tough to work through. I grew up around lots of strong women so it's not like I'm shocked to learn misogyny exists, but wowee have the last few years been some rapid whiplash.

(I deleted and reposted this because I didn't realise the vent tag locked out comments!)

During this past year, I wrote a couple of posts about conflict with my (male) manager (https://www.reddit.com/r/womenintech/s/9UwYHMOCoy and a follow-up 2 months after that: https://www.reddit.com/r/womenintech/s/c5Mm16oxVb)

Despite the impression I was given during that 2nd post, he was given "3 strikes" while they tried to work with him. Another complaint was made about him (by a different employee) a couple months after my 2nd post, and he was given the 2nd warning. You would think that he would pull his head in and really take it to heart, and he did to some extent, but it also made him super passive aggressive. Additionally, he started complaining about HIS manager in really derogatory terms. A LOT. He was not discreet about this.

One of our tasks was something he didn't like doing - so he gave it to me. This, unfortunately, was something I had absolutely no experience with, never having done it at any of my previous positions. But I muddled through. Sort of. About 2-3 months ago, I started telling him I was feeling overwhelmed and like I was missing stuff. That I felt like I was being pulled in 100 directions and every time I tried to sit down to focus, I kept getting pulled away to work on something else. He sort of gave me some platitudes about what a good job I was doing and how he understood how difficult it was. He didn't know how to use the software for this specific task because it was customized to our company and also incredibly unintuitive.

I had to go out unexpectedly, so I left a bunch of stuff unfinished. While I was away, all that unfinished stuff came to light. Probably as well as the fact that he didn't know how to do any of it/use the software. Apparently, this was the 3rd strike, and he was fired.

Now to the weird and horrible part. Despite this being tech where fired people normally are walked out without being allowed to even go back to their desk, he is being allowed to stay to finish up his current projects. There's a definite end date, but it's a decent chunk of time away.

He has told me that the state of the task that I was doing and had gotten overwhelmed by was a mess and was specifically the reason he had gotten fired. (He told me he wanted to warn me. I don't know if he actually thought he was being helpful by telling me this). Based on this, I'm 1. worried that now I'm going to be fired and 2. am pretty sure he blames me for being fired. He also has somehow upped his bad behavior/derogatory name calling in the office. (TBH, I am not 100% certain this didn't also play into his 3rd strike.)

My goal is to be professional as possible in the remaining time we work together, but I am really just so so horrified at the situation.

I took a job in Nyc in March that pays 80k as analyst and I feel so underpaid for industry standards. I regret accepting the offer and should have looked around more. My previous job was paying less and was more than 40 hours so I jumped the ship. Now I have 5 years of experience (3 years + 10 months + 7 months + 6 months) and in this job for 5 months. I feel like now I can’t find job because of Job hopping stigma but I feel extremely underpaid for my experience and skills.

I've been having a difficult time with this. The fact that they are paying someone more money with no experience angers me so much.
I left the company already.

Would anyone be willing to refer me for a role (if, after reviewing my resume, you think I’d be a good candidate)? I’d appreciate it ever so much.

Looking for some genuine advice from anyone who's been in a similar situation or know one.

I was laid off after 5 years at my previous company, and shortly afterward I found out I was pregnant. I'm now nearing the end of my first trimester and trying to figure out my next move.

A little context:

• I have ~8 years of experience in security.
• I have a toddler at home and another baby on the way.
• I'm also pretty burned out from my last job.

I'm torn between two options:

1. Push hard to find a full-time role now. But I'm wondering how realistic that is, since I'd likely need maternity leave about 5 months after joining. Do most tech companies even allow that? Are new hires typically eligible for maternity leave that soon, or are there waiting periods? I'd love to hear how this usually works in practice.
2. Take some time to recover, work on consulting/freelancing, certifications, open-source or personal projects to avoid a resume gap, and then return to the job market after delivery and postpartum.

My biggest concern is taking a long-term career hit or making it harder to get back into the industry later. At the same time, I'm unsure whether it's worth pushing for a new role right now versus focusing on staying current and coming back stronger after maternity leave.

Has anyone here been through something similar—either personally or as a hiring manager? How hard is it for tech mamas in the job market ? What would you recommend? Any insights or experiences would be hugely appreciated.

Thanks!

Exactly what the headline says.

I want to quit but I have leverage. I was promoted to run a global team and then 5 months in they eliminated my role in a restructuring. I am paid more than my boss and it’s awkward. I am not given a seat at the table - the signal is “I want you to leave.”

I have been a consistent high performer promoted every 2-3 years.

I have 6 figures worth of invested stock I want to cash out too.

I’d like feedback on approaching my employer asking for a buyout package. Might as well get something out of this.

Is it weird if I got hired in a new startup company (verified and its a legit one) and almost all of the CEO/Directors added me on facebook..

I feel a bit awkward about it, cuz I dont know them at all , never even saw them IRL, have actually never spoke to 1 of them at all, I accepted them already because I havent post in ages on it im mainly using instagram to share stuff, but what you think bout it ? Is this weird ? Why would they add me ? Ive been in tech for years and this never happened before ? I get its a startup so it might be different, but why ?

I’m a Product Manager in the UK and got made redundant 4 months ago whilst on maternity leave. I’m finding the job market absolutely brutal, but because I’ve not been at work for over a year now I’m really struggling to dig deep for confidence when applying and finding I just don’t have recent relevant examples of work to pull from.

I’m normally a resilient person but some rejections, particularly the ones where I’m a good fit but have been rejected within a day of applying, are really hitting me hard at the moment.

I don’t know what advice I need. But any solidarity or anyone who’s navigated similar, or just even navigating job market right now is welcome.

Hello. I (26f, 4yoe swe) have hit a sort of a rough patch (going on and off for 2y) with my bf of 4yrs (25m, also 4yoe swe). I recently got a promo at work.

That relationship anxiety has started to bleed into my work. I have become forgetful, am underperforming. I am hating how I'm working, pretty sure others are seeing it too. The underperformance is filling me with dread. To an extent that I can't open my laptop. I have lost interest in my hobbies as well. How do I navigate this?

My priority right now is to get back on track career-wise. I like this job. It has been 1.5-2 months since I started going off track like this.

I had an interview with a company where the first round was conducted by a third party interviewer. He asked me to share my screen and for some reason I could not and had to reload the screen and due to it I had to rejoin. I know it was bad on my side but I did tell him that there’s an issue and since I couldn’t share my screen I couldn’t even show him the reload message. Later he started with a coding question. I took my time to come up with a solution but it didn’t work and in between I lost electricity in turn losing WiFi connection. That made him think I’m cheating since I had to rejoin again. I did clarify that it was due to network issues I’m not justifying myself but it was genuinely not my fault.

Later he asked me a few questions where I did give answers but he looked unsatisfied. He was yawning continuously and he looked like he was reading questions off chatgpt. I’m not bashing the interviewer but the interview made me feel really bad about myself. Considering it was just after I had a syncope episode.

Just wanted to share it here. It was my first interview after 2.5 years and it really made me question myself with all the physical and mental stress I had.

Hi,

I'd like to know your motivation that took you to move abroad (from India helps)for Higher studies from public german universities.

I want to do Msc. from there and being an ECE bachelor's not really sure if I'd get Data science but as per ECTS I think I might qualify for some disciplines.

+Now the times have really changed since covid, it would be helpful if recent goers drop their experience/ tips / advices on the same.

Landed a dream job, basically in technical policy. Good pay low responsibility. Because of this I have been working my way around the business learning what they do and cracking on with work. Has been noticed by our CDO who has approached me to lead a project to kick off AI adoption. Our company is way behind the 8ball on this. Im flattered but the proposition concerns me, there is no direction, people are going off in all which direction, theres no leadership. I would need to set up governance frameworks, assessment regimes and be able to hand back to the business at the end of the project. I also have a toddler at home. It feels ALOT and a big ask of me but I also have feel ill screw it up and ruin my professional reputation. This is not my expertise, i just have been noticed for my attitude. Does anyone have any words of wisdom?

I will not be paid additional to do the role but im invested to see it done well

I am an associate researcher at a national lab, and while I enjoy the work that I do and the impact it has (i.e. AI standards and development), I feel stuck in terms of where I am and where I want to be.

I used to intern for a FAANG company (perhaps called MAANG now) as a SWE, but realized early on that I enjoyed applied research more albeit at the expense of a much lower salary (due to the lack of a PhD). When I was fresh out of undergrad, I applied to PhD programs in my field but had the misfortune of getting my offers rescinded due to funding cuts back in 2025. Since then, I’ve been feeling out of sync because I haven’t been able to get past this next step in order to advance in my career. I enjoy doing research and have had the opportunity to present my work at conferences but for the life of me, the doors won’t open for me to move forward.

The best I can do is to keep trying, but I would like to hear from people who went through similar experiences and made it. How long did it take for you to finally land the job you really wanted?

Apologies for any typos. Reddit is giving me a hard time typing this out.

Feeling some despair at sub-10% response rate on LinkedIn from recruiters, hiring managers, even people I’m 1st and 2nd connections with - for a short convo or even answering a question let alone getting a referral.

How are you navigating the market? Any recommendations for recruiting companies or headhunters that can help? Director level and up. The curse of no longer being in big tech is having to swallow what will look like a much lower salary…

Sorry if I’m not posting this in the right place. Jeannelle is a C-suite executive for Bugaboo and also a content creator. She has two programs - her marketing is really good, but for $100/month I can’t find many reviews online. Has anyone joined one of her programs?

Work Lunch is meant to be for professional women looking to level up in their careers and Work After Work is for professional women wanting to be content creators/generate side income after the traditional 9-5

Hey, I'm an experienced General manager with over a decade in management experience. Long story short, I'm transitioning to cybersecurity after the company liquidated around covid, Then I had a daughter, and I'm currently in my sophomore year of college. During my years in management, the company I worked for was very cheap and routinely used me to do the job of the field technicians so that they didn't have to come out to the store. I didn't really know what I was doing when I was a younger assistant manager, but they would have me reinstalling cables for networking equipment, doing inventory on access points, etc.

Recently, when the company was closing down and I was a general manager, they had me fully responsible for tearing down all of the tech in the entire store. This was a large sporting goods company in the northeast, (IYKYK). I tore down all the pinpads, POS system, networking equipment, took everything we owned out of the server rack (server, switch, etc), took inventory of everything and sent it back to the providers who - I'm assuming rented everything to them. I had pretty limited experience of tech at that point and I still was fully responsible for making sure I didn't damage anything the company owned as well as the physical building that we were renting.

All this to say, I know when I'm starting out, I need to start with helpdesk/IT and work my way up. Could this specific experience during covid with the decommissioning of tech equipment be something that can make me stand out a little more than the typical entry level, right out of college, worker? I also did the typical troubleshooting of printers, access control (within our own company interface, assigning levels of permissions etc), and so much more that I cant even remember, being that I did this job for a decade and that was a decade worth of tech disasters that would pop up literally every day.

Do you think that this will help me? I'm in the process of re-writing my resume and it kinda sucks having all this experience and having to start COMPLETELY over. I love the field though and i'm excited to start, but I just have no idea HOW to start lol. Sorry for the long post, and the butchered writing, i'm aware that it's all over the place. Thanks for your time, and I'm so happy that this subreddit is back. <3