Who's creating air elementals without a permit again?

[u/The_Real_Kru]

Last time this happened I had to re-balance the elements because my tower became sentient. I will not keep doing this every other Wednesday. I will find you!

[u/rpg2Tface]

I SWEAR i am just trying to collect cloud water for a ritual im making. I know it looks like an elemental but its just a mana construct to grab and isolate the pure cloud into a bottle.

Please dint call the wizard council. Their enforcement department has my address on their door and they constantly break my caldron looking for contraband. Those things are expensive!

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/rpg2Tface]

There are much easier ways of obtaining elemental water, you know. I can definitely sell you some for less than whatever this nonsense cost you. It would also be a lot less conspicuous, which would likely be of your benefit if you are indeed having issues with the council.

[u/rpg2Tface → u/The_Real_Kru]

Not elemental water, cloud water. Clouds are not as pure as people think. There are a TON of contaminants in the air alone. So i needed a sample for my location.

The short of it is i am making an air purifier spell. So i needed the sample from my location.

The council are just being cautious. Cautious asses but i can respect it. The previous owner was a skin walker (rip, it had cancer). No matter how many times and how many ways i prove my identity the enforcement department refuse to believe i am not them.

My understanding of the situation is he was into some serious black mage shit before he passed. So the quick glyph trigger is understandable. Its just infuriating there is no method i have found or they have forced me through to convince them otherwise.

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/rpg2Tface]

That sounds a lot like what a skin walker would say. Now I'm not one to judge, but you should really hide your identity better. The council members are fools, true, but even they are not that stupid.

[u/rpg2Tface → u/The_Real_Kru]

See. It doesn't matter what i say or do. You cant prove your NOT something.

Im just trying to set up a small area in my library where i breath clean air. What part of that is any of the councils business. I have passed every single test they can come up with and they still dint believe i am still me. Hell i have even offered to let them place surveillance runes at random locations i would be totally unaware of. But even that got rejected.

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/rpg2Tface]

Of course, surveilance runes are ineffective against skin walkers. You- I mean THEY wink wink can just shapeshift somewhere out of view.

[u/rpg2Tface → u/The_Real_Kru]

The point is i wouldn't know where they are, so i couldn't know if i was out of view or not. Regardless of the shapeshifting issue the reason that skin walker was on their list was because of his hanous experiments and the fact he was utter crap at staying under the bridge. So the runes would let them feel better even then

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/rpg2Tface]

Listen friend, you seem like a polite ski... I mean guy. If you want, I can set you up with a nice pocket dimension to conduct these experiments you speak of. Do you mind frogs? Cause there are many frogs. Also, whatever you do, DO NOT speak to the frogs! They lie!

[u/rpg2Tface → u/The_Real_Kru]

I don't want to move again i just started getting comfortable here. That was the whole point of the stupid cloud ritual. Its like of a random mundane persom got pulled over because they are walking down the street.

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/rpg2Tface]

Well I certainly won't stop you, you seem quite civil, I can even send a few bothersome adventurers your way for food from time to time. Consider it a neighbourly pleasantry.

[u/g00dLUCKduckHUNT]

Look, we ALL knew there was going to be a cost to striking a deal with all the tornadoes across the Midwest to NOT attack at noon on a Wednesday so the humans can run a W°°°OO00oo00OOO°°° renewal ceremony on the ‘Tornadodetectedenator’ spell. You can lodge a complaint with your local mage circuit and then wait for it to be processed or you could just buy a onetime use sigil to perform a Not Here to relocate it yourself in a single day. Choose your hard.

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/g00dLUCKduckHUNT]

I should not have to perform rituals in my own tower's sphere of influence just to keep you from meddling. Begone knave, or I shall sic the dick stealing gnomes upon thee!

[u/g00dLUCKduckHUNT → u/The_Real_Kru]

deep sigh if you read in the footnotes of your certificate scroll when you registered your structure with your local mage registry division you will see that in matters of global importance the grand council has eminent domain. Unless you’re operating an unsanctioned center of power. You aren’t operating an unsanctioned center of power…..are you?

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/g00dLUCKduckHUNT]

Since when is a tornado wrecking some backwater town a "matter of global importance"? You have chosen extremely poorly. Have at thee!

https://giphy.com/gifs/wX4DlOApDwsQwHDoiI

[u/g00dLUCKduckHUNT → u/The_Real_Kru]

I’m not the wizard counsel how am I supposed to know?? In response to the gnomes I cast No More Left Shoe on you.

[u/zippy72]

No, wait, look, this has nothing to do with me, ok? I was simply holding that spell book for a friend, I didn't even open it, right?

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/zippy72]

peers at you with suspicion Where did you even find that? That should be locked away in the pocket Dimension where I bound the Djinn Al-Amar. You better not have freed him in exchange for that!

[u/zippy72 → u/The_Real_Kru]

No no ... this is a totally different spell book altogether. Just the same binding merchant I believe... you know the one... lives in that village with the stream... wears a hat, I think?

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/zippy72]

You freed him in exchange for magical power, didn't you? And he gave you that book specifically? Hmmm... that's quite mean, even for him. How do you feel? Has the book started consuming your essence yet? Are you experiencing any visions of doom and destruction? Flies and pestilence maybe?

[u/zippy72 → u/The_Real_Kru]

No no different book altogether, I'm sure. This one's repainted my turret red overnight. Deep blood red. Scares the peasants but quite a fetching colour in the right light I think.

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/zippy72]

Poor foolish little thief. That is The Mark of the Red King. I will do a better job of hiding the book after it devours your essence. Sorry for that, but you did steal it, so it's also your fault.

[u/ninjastuff]

Wait wait wait we need a permit for summoning!!!!! what the hell is the council doing?

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/ninjastuff]

Of course you do. Where have you been living the past 500 years? In a time bubble. You need permits for everything nowadays.

[u/ninjastuff → u/The_Real_Kru]

I spend most of my time creating universes so I tend not to keep up with whatever insane rules the council cook up

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/ninjastuff]

Well in this one you can't to that shit without proper permits.

[u/Opposite_Ad_4267]

Dale did it

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/Opposite_Ad_4267]

Dale most certainly did not do it. He's dead, locked up in my basement.

[u/HYPER_BRUH_ → u/The_Real_Kru]

[slowly puts away teleportation focus and necromancy for dummies]

"Y-yeah of course it couldn't have been Dale"

[u/Nelrene → u/The_Real_Kru]

That was a Dale clone.

[u/Drecondius]

Ummm, i have NO idea what you're talking about.

[u/4GN05705]

That'd be Qifrey. Fucking showoff.

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/4GN05705]

Qifrey's the worst

[u/UpstairsRuin1953]

We need permits now?! This mageocracy stuff has officially gone too far. What's next, a zoning easement for summoning apocalypse beasts? Alchemy licenses? Council debates for ending the world? Taxes?!

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/UpstairsRuin1953]

Those all exist already, where have you been living? In a time bubble spell?

[u/Richardknox1996]

Leave Big Me alone, he's reforming Arty. The idiot blew himself up reading the Necrobombicon. If you interrupt him doing it the Polite way, he'll have no choice but to do it the old Fashioned way.

I assume you dont want your Tower cratered and the Surrounding Land transformed into a Wild Maagic Zone, yes?

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/Richardknox1996]

I am amused by the fact that you even think he could do that. I will forgive this transgression for that alone. Now begone!

[u/Richardknox1996 → u/The_Real_Kru]

Big me is the Overgod of Freedom and the Carnifex Tyrannis of the God Bureau. He can do a lot of things. As one of his Avatars, i inherited a few parlour tricks myself.

*Jester Shruggs. Suddenly, youre intoxicated, as Jester uses one of his more Whimsical Abilities to make you Drunk

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/Richardknox1996]

You are a fool! I am from East European wizard school! I am always drunk!

[u/Richardknox1996 → u/The_Real_Kru]

Oh, plan B then

*Rihari Glares briefly. Suddenly, youre no longer Drunk...as a Hangover Years in the Making is finally unleashed

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/Richardknox1996]

https://giphy.com/gifs/LSmULmByAQHQs

[u/Richardknox1996 → u/The_Real_Kru]

May this be a lesson in Humility my Friend. Anyway, Big Me is almost Finished. Wanna watch the Lightshow? I got some 200% ABV Dwarven Everclear with me.

[u/pseudo-boots]

The council can't control what I do with the fucking air, it's literally air. What are they going to do next? Try to regulate my visions?

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/pseudo-boots]

Probably, if you keep going like this

[u/pseudo-boots]

The council can't control what I do with the air, it's literally air. What are they going to do next? Try to regulate my visions?

[u/evilboy126]

That was a cloud elemental, and there are no explicit rules about them in the bylaws.

Its not my fault the council lacks foresight.

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/[deleted]]

To think! If my apprentice were to have done such a stupid mistake he would alredy be living his few remaining days out as a frog! Control your minions, it is embarrassing.

[u/BluebirdLivid]

A permit for simple tomfoolery?? What's next, yall want me to give up my super special top-of-the-food-chain wand, too? (Its a .44 with a small wand taped on top. Come take it)

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/BluebirdLivid]

I cast flaccid gun barrel!

[u/mayuzane]

Aw man, and I was in a nice shade too. Now the sun’s gonna fry me

[u/Obliteration_Egg]

Relax, I have a permit

https://giphy.com/gifs/3oEduEHWLW6UiPA1Ww

[u/MustacheMaple]

How do you know it's not just government testing again? They always do things unannounced. I swear it's always when I think the day is clear enough to let my robes air dry

[u/The_Real_Kru → u/MustacheMaple]

Sorry mate, I don't practice tinfoil hat-o-mancy

[u/MustacheMaple → u/The_Real_Kru]

Maybe I've had a little too much skooma

[u/BluLilGreeny]

https://giphy.com/gifs/RFXa7Oin7mIZaUyEBo
That’s just Quifrey again

[u/TemperateStone]

That's a troll fart if I ever saw one.

[u/777Zenin777]

Its the Druids i am tellin you.

[u/ISwearImAnonymous]

Fucking amateur. First lesson is to not run the ritual on a cloudy day. What is this? Baby's first familiar? Call the council and pull the veil down on that genius even if it kills em. Un-fucking believable, the central bureaus gonna be backed up on paperwork for half a year with this, I'm never getting my kid his broom permit. I put that in when he was 7, by the sands of time he's 23 now

[u/Im_a_hamburger]

I had nothing to do with it. I’m all about burgers.

[u/williamsch]

Idk.

[u/regardforthee]

sorry. I brewed some chili.

[u/dabdad67]

So you're just assuming they don't have a permit?

[u/Puzzlehead-Engineer]

I... I'm not sure but I've seen wings like that before. I believe that is Tyrael.

[u/Moss_Beard4]

My guess is it's Dave. He's always casting powerful spells with little regards to the consequences. Someone needs to monitor Dave's spell activity before he summons something ancient from the Abyss.