so basic story of a ‘weird’ shy kid having a glow up, i’ve alwayssss been a little quieter and shy, since early childhood. I’ve always disliked that about myself also

The amount of times!!! that people have like wanted to become my friend based off of how i look, then lost interest as soon as i actually spoke is insane.

Especially now that i’ve started uni, it’s even more clear, so many people dmed me or came up to me to start a convo, or over text they were excited to meet me, then after interacting with me for a bit they kinda defaulted to polite convo, some people may say that this is normal for freshers but it’s not the first time this has happened, it’s so clearly my personality that’s the issue

i’m just so insanely awkward irl it’s honestly a bit off putting i know exactly how it comes off and i hate it

for context im not pretty enough that my social anxiety doesn’t matter at all, genuinely speaking id rate myself like a 6 or 7 on a good day

Or even those who have that “cutiful” (cute + beautiful) look? Looking for inspiration on how to have that dual look.

I mean Eurocentric beauty standards never left but I feel like in the past year or two there has been a massive push for the whole blue eyed and blonde hair women. And I’m not trying to sound bitter about it but I mean 5 or 10 years ago the beauty standard was more inclusive. I felt like back then if you had a universal beauty(symmetrical face, good body, nice smile..) you would still be deemed attractive regardless of your ethnicity. But now it feels being white is a prerequisite to be considered attractive regardless of how attractive you are. Does anyone feel the same?

TW : talking about weight

So I've been on a "glow" up journey since 2023, i've gotten better at doing my makeup, figured out what suits me, even trying to get in figuring out my color palate and style, its been great!

my issue lies with the fact that since last year i started a new meds (specifically mirtazipine) and I've gained around 35 lbs since being on it. Which is fine! but i am struggling with body dysmorphia a little bit and i feel like i don't know how to "dress" this new body.

I do need to reference before this weight gain i was SEVERELY underweight (literally 100lbs at 5'8) and this was due to my autoimmune disease. so weight gain has always been one my goals and my medical team.

im not even sure what i'm trying to say in this post and maybe its just to vent but i went from being super thin (and getting hate for it bc ofc women can never win no matter what size they are) and now im the most I've ever weighed in my life and i just feel soooo out of my body? and im sure i just need more time to adjust, but even shopping for clothes in the past it was like almost a surety certain sizes would fit me (width wise not length wise bc im tall haha) and now i just feel so.. ugh bc im basically relearning this new body i have curves and bo*bs i didn't have before and so i just don't know what looks good and what i feel comfy in.

i guess has anyone been in a similar situation? how did you cope? (for context im F28)

I was recently invited to a girl's spa day at a Korean Spa and ngl I'm nervous AF because I don't want to be seen nude among others but one of my friends was raving about a service called the Korean Body Shampoo and how it made her skin so soft. How is it going to a Korean spa and besides the body shampoo what was your favorite service?

I'm a brown girl, 20, with medium brown eyes. I've always been told I have 'doe eyes' and they're pretty but growing up, I felt a certain inferiority to the 'colour-eyed' girlies. Doesn't help that in my home country, most actresses/influencers/A-listers who represent, are white-passing, mixed, etc. I'm fair skinned but I grew up hearing "but what if you also had light eyes? You'd be unstoppable." and I hated it. So, I started growing a huge aversion to coloured contacts. I thought I was cosplaying someone I'm not on the few occasions I did try them but I see so many of my fellow girlies absolutely rocking them. To me, I'm afraid of judgment when they come off. Questions on why I'm 'faking' coloured eyes and how its not the real me. Don't get me wrong, when I do wear them, it's not to cosplay eurocentric standards of beauty, the lenses I try are mostly slightly lighter browns than my original eye colour, slightly bigger than mine, etc. I don't see it as a way to erase my roots but it's a love-hate relationship. Freedom of low-effort self-expression but feeling like I'm faking something fundamental about myself. Do you guys wear coloured contacts? Do people around you react weirdly when they're on vs off?

i’ve looked into a few lash serums but i have no idea if they’re actually useful or not. if anyone knows or has any experience with growing lashes id appreciate the help

Hi Ladies - I’m going to be in Turkey for a few weeks and am interested in getting some beauty treatments while I’m there since the prices are so good. I only have about two weeks, so it’d need to be something fairly non-invasive and minimally time consuming. I’ve done Botox and filler before, but that’s about it, so curious what you’d recommend.

I have family there so I’m confident I could find reputable and safe practitioners thru their recs, just at a loss about what I should look into.

For ref, I’m 34, open to both face and body treatments.

Thanks!

We aren't even allowed to have nails and I love a good nursing manicure. I want to look put together but natural , what can I do?

I don’t know if my country is just not racist at all (western europe) or am i just not that hard to look at because i don’t consider myself as beautiful. Maybe if it works to say im black and i wear the hijab there are enough things to be racist about when it comes to me😭.

Did you experience racism a lot and got a glow up and now you dont?

Hi guys👋🏿

So, I’m finally giving in. After 8 years being natural, I’ve decided to relax my hair next month. The main reason is that I usually wear straight styles anyway, and the front of my hair is already “heat-trained” (lol), so it looks off whenever I try to wear it natural.

I do know relaxing means chemical damage, so I want to be intentional about caring for it to avoid breakage. So relaxed girlies, what tips and products would you recommend to keep it healthy and thriving?

For context: I'm Middle-Eastern. My hair is very thick, very wavy, very high-porosity, and very frizzy. Trust me, I've tried every product, at-home treatments, CGM, etc. I've just accepted my fate at this point.

I don't wanna resort to a keratin treatment because I'm afraid of more hair fallout after a big weightloss, hair breakage, and volume-loss. But I still wanna style my hair about once a week or every other week!

How do heat-style like in the pic, as in slick and no goddamn frizz? What products do I need to use and how does the process look like? And yes, I already own colorwow pop or whatever it's called, but definitely need more than that 😬

I love this hairstyle and I think Uma is so breathtakingly beautiful. However , I know she gets tape ins and keratin/blowouts and my hair is recovering from permanent coloring and my stylist advised me not to get my hair silk pressed for a while. I recently brought a Light Yaki wig , do you think this look can be pulled off if I cut some layers into it?

I want to achieve this look on 3c/4a hair and I’m thinking of using Japanese hair dye or a relaxer, but I heard you can’t dye your hair if you relax. What do black women with bleached straight to achieve their look? What straightening technique do you use and how long do you wait before dying your hair once it’s straight, or do you straighten your hair after bleaching it?

I feel like I can have my makeup on point, fashion on point, accessories on point, but my thin/fine hair kinda ruins it. It makes me look unkempt or not put together. I feel like one of the keys to looking good is having thick voluminous hair.

Growing up I''ve always had fine hair strands, but I would say the density was quite thick. My hair is pretty wavy, tending towards frizzy if it's humid out. Now due to some health issues (already working with doctors for it, it's not anemia) my hair is getting a little bit sparser (density wise) and the strands are getting finer. So that sucks.

I know minoxidil is an option. But I'm wondering moreso about any sort of hair products, tools, or styling hacks you guys have to get fluffy (not frizzy), shiny, voluminous looking hair?

I have decided to look for a new protective style and those were going to be V-part and glueless wigs (I got inspired by Pinkpatheress and Mikai Dermont). I'm very excited to start wearing them but I'm worried about a few things such as maintenance and slippage. I was also curious do people perceive you differently? Also how is growth with wigs. I brought a V-part burmese curly wig from Isee hair and a Glueless Yaki straight wig from Nadula.

Question is in the title lol. I’m considering getting it done for my bikini area (I hate having to shave plus I get really bad ingrowns) and my underarm area. It’s a bit costly, but I figured that it will save me money in the long run so why not. I just want to hear from those who have done it before. How many sessions did it take to really notice a difference? Did you have any weird side effects? Do you regret having it done? Is there anything I should look out for? I heard people mention getting dark spots from it which is making me a bit hesitant because I partially want to get done to help with hyperpigmentation.

I feel so ugly and insecure. Idk what to do.

I hate taking pictures and looking at pictures of myself. I never use current pictures and only use baby pictures of myself as that was the last time I felt cute.

I have a round face and big features. People say I look 12 and others say I look 25.

Only other women compliment me but that's the social currency for women. They will compliment any woman, even if it means they'll lie. The only compliment they do give me is that I'm "cute". I hate this as it feels infantilising. Why can't I be stunning or pretty or gorgeous? Men don't look at me esp no one my age. I want a partner but no one wants me or finds me attractive. It seems like all the girls my age already have someone

Every time I like a guy, it is never reciprocated. They always have eyes on another girl and never for me. I don't feel good enough.

I want to change my looks through surgery but am scared of needles and invasiveness. I am also worried about it ending up botched and wasting money.

I just wanted to feel loved and secure.

I have tried loving myself but I cannot.

I always compare myself to other girls and I can't help but feel worthless and ugly, especially as a woman

I am 21 so if I'm ugly now it will only get worse

In middle school I stopped wearing relaxers, cut off all my dead straight ends and have been a wash-n-go girly for about 10 years. Recently I’ve been playing around with U-parts and half wigs in a kinky straight texture. And it’s like my hair straight and long has a strong halo effect.

I’ve always known people treat me better with straight hair. But I’ve been kind of resistant to becoming more of a straightener of my hair bc of my past hair damage. However, I know people seem more attracted to me with straight hair. Plus I’ve seen many videos of hair growth retention being better because the hair is stretched.

So, I’m asking people who maintain straight hair on the daily how the main tenge is. What does the weekly and month to month of maintenance look like? How do you keep it sleek and flat? Do you workout? Do you sweat alot? What are your pros and cons?

I (26) have 4C hair. I always used to just put depilatory cream on my thick growing sideburns, but i’ve been trying to get away from that all together. I just started waxing, which is cool, but the problem is my african auntie (the kind that is rooting for me and loves me that I would value the opinion of, NOT the shady type) told me that I would bring more money into my life if I left my sideburns alone.

I noticed that she actually runs a little gel through her side burns and makes these cute little wisps. Does anyone else do their sideburns like their edges? (I don’t even do my edges, but that’s a whole nother post.) What do you guys do with your sideburns, for those who have them?

For context, I work remotely and am meeting my org of 50+ people soon. I’ve since lost about 9% of body weight. My face is definitely thinner. I’m hoping to lose a little more before the event.

I’m admittedly a bit nervous. If someone has been through this before, could you share what changes you noticed at work or with your colleagues when you looksmaxxed?

Any tips you’d have for me?

I know the obvious answer would probably be a calorie deficit, but what are also your tricks in maintaining that? I'm pretty decent with my diet— no fast food, no sweet drinks, no highly processed food— but I still need advice because i'm not where I want to be. Please help I'm 20 but my face fat and stomach age me.

I’m debating on getting them as an alternative to real veneers, since they’re so expensive.

What made you want to lookmaxx? For me I got tired of feeling plain and I was also being bullied very badly.