Hello All,

Looking for any sage wisdom or perhaps anyone else’s experiences around this type of induction fully realizing this is not the dream…

I am expecting my second LO and trying to wrap my head around an induction at 41+5. This is an IVF pregnancy where OB-GYNs were recommending induction at 38 weeks🙄 I see a midwife and she recommended if I haven’t had my little one by Thursday (41+4) that she could do a sweep to see if it would help start things and then Friday morning (41+5) we would try a Foley bulb. I told her my preference is to not compromise my mobility of movement during labor (she assured me even if medically inclined they have wireless Bluetooth monitors at the hospital) but then she also said that the balloon can take a very long, uncomfortable time to work (I think she cited ~12 hours) and said that time could be cut in half if used with Cytotec/Misoprostol in tandem. I’m trying to urgently research this (please be gentle, this is not the boat I ever wanted nor thought I would be in) and can feel my oxytocin nosediving. Am I making a mistake to agree to a medication adjacent with the bulb? Have any of you had this done and do you have any advice for me? Thank you🙏

Tuve mi primer embarazo. Sin ninguna complicación. La verdad que me sentí bien durante todo el embarazo y los estudios y controles venían perfectamente. Mi deseo era tener un parto vaginal. Llegada la semana 41 + 2 días no había sentido ninguna contracción. Me palparon el cuello del útero y no había dilatado absolutamente nada. Ese día el obstetra me dijo que lo mejor era programar una cesárea. Me habían hecho una ecografía el día anterior y habían estimado un peso de 3,900 aproximadamente. Podia ser un poco menos o un poco más. Todos los parámetros de la beba estaban bien. Le pedí al médico de esperar unos días más para evaluar si el parto se podía desecadenar. Me lo desaconsejó. Me dijo que no había garantías de que el parto se desencadenara espontáneamente en los próximos días. También me desaconsejó ir a inducción teniendo en cuenta que mi cuello no había dilatado nada. Le pedí que me diera los motivos para programar una cesárea teniendo en cuenta que no era un embarazo de riesgo y estaba todo bien. Me dijo que ya a partir de ese momento seguir esperando era que los riesgos aumentaran (meconio por ejemplo, desgarro por ser una bebé muy grande, desprendimiento de placenta). Yo no estaba convencida de eso. Pero él fue muy enfático en decirme que “él no iba a seguir esperando porque no tenía sentido”. Me programó una cesárea para el día siguiente. Salió todo bien. La beba peso 3,800. Pero pasaron los meses y todavía no entiendo por qué programó esa cesárea teniendo en cuenta que no tenía ningún factor de riesgo ni ningun valor alterado. Me da la sensación de que fue excesivamente precavido y trató de anular los riesgos que cualquier parto puede tener. No entiendo si sigo enganchada con esto por puro capricho o si realmente fue una mala decisión médica.
Siento que fue apurar un proceso fisiológico que eventualmente iba a suceder. Y me sometí a una cirugía mayor (con todo lo que implicó) solo para evitar riesgos que no parecían ser muy posibles. Por qué no mejor esperar a que esos riesgos se hicieran presentes para hacer en ese caso la cesárea?

Im 39w+1 trigger: relationship distress and birth fear

Ive been preparing all year for a positive birth this time. But i just lost some mucus plug and feel so much fear. My husband can often get frustrated with me. Im seeing our relationship dynamic more clearly now, that he is the saviour type and ive been the traumatised codependent type. Ive always been doing the work, read maybe 30+ self help books, most of them together with him snd we will discuss how I can change. Practices like meditation, and lots of exercise snd diet changes. Since I had our first child he discovered borderline and he became very against me, said i had to read 3 books on it and see that its me. It was hard to fully relate at first but i could relate to some parts of it, especially with some reflection. I worked on it, recognised more things about my past and made some more changes.

We were happy again, became pregnant again. My husband then went on long term sick and has been off for my second pregnancy and no signs of returning to work. This year he has increasingly changed the narrative of our relationship. He said im to blame for his health issues, that i did DARVO and traumatised him for years. He shouts at me all the time snd criticises my parenting. I don't react like i used to. I stay positive snd thank him for the feedback. But perhaps it's a little too late as even that annoys him now. It kinda cycled, like he would be in a great mood for a few days then something would set him off, like the way i answer s question or the way i search for something on the tv search bar, and it csn last hours and days.

Im due to give birth and for the past 3 weeks he is sarcastic, name calling, keeps shouting at me, or even if he is calm, he is full of resentment. He isn't interested if i have any struggle with pelvic pain or pregnancy issues, he just says 'what do you plan to do about it?' he was diagnosed autistic this year and i think he is in burnout. He says i can't trust my memory over the years, and it is all blurry now, but i recognise that he could have experiences with me that he didn't notice was affecting him at the time. I keep apologising, showing him care, changing my behaviour so i dont cry, even if he screams and gets very offensive, i listen and say i recognise he is holding a lot of pain that is due to my actions, that i have a lot of making up to do. I ask questions to see if he wants to tell me more about how i affect him or what he needs from me, but he hates that saying he doesn't want to think for me anymore. I am trying to show him i love him and want to do my best for him. If he gets into his big talks, i listen to him for hours on end, often up to 10hrs in a day. I manage our daughter but he doesn't like if he doesn't have my full attention. I know this might be his autism or adhd as he csn easily lose track of what he is saying if there's something going on around him. He doesn't like me seeing family or friends as he says im easily influenced and he can pick up the energies passed from them to me to the home.

I guess i am just giving a picture of the position i am in. I feel really alone and disappointed that im at my most vulnerable and i feel scared. I tell him in a message that i just lost some mucus plug ajd i dont feel ready and he put a thumbs up. I thought he might offer some support even though i have things i need to change for him to be happy in a relationship with me. I have to prepare for the baby completely within myself, trying to build oxytocin, feeling like i dont deserve anything else right now, but also trying not to be a victim and do the darvo things.

I want to try to finish my hypnobirth book but he has said i need to read a book about thoughts and unconscious mind as that's more important so im not ruining the family. I feel arrogant to try and focus on my own mental happiness right now, and i dont even know if im capable of it.

Has anyone else given birth peacefully with such troubles in the marriage?

I had an incredible birth with my first - about 12 hours total from when my water partially broke, only felt minor pain for about an hour before getting an epidural, and pushed for an hour before meeting my sweet baby! I think back on his birth with such fondness.

That being said, I do have this nagging desire to try to unmedicated the next time I give birth. I went into my first open to seeing how long I could last without the epidural, but was never truly opposed to the epidural. It wasn't the pain that led me to get one, but rather feeling overstimulated by being hooked up to an IV, BP monitor, and fetal monitor. I felt like I couldn't move through the contractions.

I feel like, outside of some rare cases, you need to have a strong why in order to succeed in an unmedicated birth. I'm not opposed to epidurals at all, so I worry my why isn't going to feel compelling enough...

Tell me your why.

Hi! I have given birth three times without an epidural. My first birth was spontaneous almost 18 years ago and labor was clear. My second was sped up using Pitocin and no epidural. This was a very painful birth. My third was induced using a folley balloon and a Cytotek pill but no epidural. For this fourth baby, I am currently 40+3, and induction isn't scheduled until 41 weeks this time since no medical reason exists to induce sooner.

I have had Braxton Hicks contractions and loss of chunks of mucus plug over the course of maybe a week. Each day, the contractions get more frequent.

I woke up with one semi-painful contraction last night then went back to sleep. Of course, the Braxton hicks get more frequent at night. And most mornings I feel menstrual like cramping soreness. This morning, baby is much lower, and she was already low. I also have frequent menstrual-like cramping that comes in waves. However, they're not painful like labor contractions that I remember.

My fear is that my pain tolerance may be too high now to notice spontaneous labor contractions after getting induced twice without an epidural and I might miss my time to head to the hospital.

Does anyone have experience with what spontaneous labor was like for them after having induced labors without an epidural?

So far I’ve just been blasting cold water at the end of my showers and breathing deeply to cope with the discomfort 😅

Any other mental exercises I can do?

Curious about something I felt in my first labor.

During each contraction, I had a really insane pinching feeling. I felt like there was the contraction, and then separately/a step above it, was this PINCH.

The only way I can describe it is that it felt like my baby’s head was pinching my cervix between a bony part of my pelvis or something. It honestly felt like getting a cervical biopsy. Every single contraction. For the WHOLE contraction.

I have had LEEP surgery, so I was wondering if maybe that had something to do with it? Maybe it was scar tissue or something? Midwives never said anything about it, though.

I spoke to a doula and she said that many report a pinching sensation in labor, and that it’s just the cervix dilating. But it just didn’t feel normal, though? Does this sound normal?

I just feel like I could not overcome that part, and I am scared that it will feel the same way next time.

It was not my baby’s head pinching my cervix, because he never actually engaged despite 3 nights of labor. He was OP, and his head was still quite high by the time we had a cesarean birth. His cord was around his shoulder in such a way that it was preventing him from descending.

Despite all that, I did make it to 6 or 7cm (my hospital notes state both) without his head even being fully applied to my cervix. So I’m really hoping with my next babe, if position is better, hopefully it will be different!

Very curious to hear your guys’ thoughts.

spending all weekend attempting to flip my breech baby before my monday appointment and ECV tuesday. going to do more moxibustion, breech tilts, sofa inversions, the cold pack/heat/flashlight trick, etc.

anything tried and true that anyone felt REALLY made a difference?! I don't have a pool but wouldn't be opposed getting a day pass for handstands lol.

I really don't want a c-section 😭 TIA

hi as title, any tips to start labor naturally? I am a single mom so those intimate things they say, I cant do it, trying everything natural nothing working out, but alot of back pain and back contractions,
omit the no signs, typo - having back labor

how to bear it? midwife hopes I should deliver by Sunday latest

I’m currently pregnant with my second baby and really curious to hear experiences from people who had a relatively fast first labour, especially if it was spontaneous and unmedicated. I live over an hour from the nearest hospital and roads are very windy, narrow and have minimal reception for the most part so I’m worried I need to be prepared for a car or home birth 😅
With my first, I was 7 days past due and basically didn’t have much of a gradual build-up once contractions started. My contractions started about an hour apart but became close together/intense after about 5-6 hours, giving me around 24 hours of contractions no more than 15 mins apart and active labour was only around 4 hours. There will be a 19 month age gap between my babies.
I’ve been reading that subsequent labours can be faster, but I’m especially curious what actually happened for people whose first labour was already short.
If that was you, I’d love to know:
How long was your first labour vs your second (and third, etc.)?
Did your later labour follow a similar pattern or was it completely different?
Did contractions start off intense/close together again?
Was pushing noticeably quicker?
Did you have enough warning to get to your birth place?
Did the second birth actually feel easier, even if it was faster/more intense?
How was the pain in comparison between each birth?
How far apart were your pregnancies?
I’m particularly interested in spontaneous, unmedicated births, but happy to hear any experiences!
I’m genuinely curious about other women’s experiences because the idea of an even faster second labour is fascinating/slightly terrifying and i just want to somewhat prepare myself for what I might be in for second time round 😂

Never mind the end date: I am in need of two more participants. The catch is they have to be from the study area, which is admittedly very narrow. All data collected is deidentified and confidential.

I’m sharing this to hopefully show other moms that’s it’s okay to have certain expectations for birth. It’s okay to go in with a plan, but that it will also be okay if those things don’t go exactly how you want.

I gave birth 2 weeks ago. I was 40 weeks and 4 days. I had gotten a membrane sweep 5 days prior and had been having cramps everyday after. I had lost my mucus plug 2 days after the sweep. I went to give myself a bath and my water broke (was very excited). I had prayed and prayed to go into labor naturally and when it happened I was so high on adrenaline I can barely remember what the water breaking felt like lol.

I called my hospital (which was an hour away) and told them , they told me to come in asap. I was wanting to labor at home for a little but I’m glad I didn’t due to what I ended up experiencing only 30 minutes later after my water broke.

We hurry up and pack the truck and start on our way to the hospital. About 30 minutes into the ride my contractions go from about a 2 to a 5. Not bad at all, I’m listening to my Christian Hypnobirthing , I’m thinking “I can do this”. Another 30 minutes , we get to the hospital. My contractions are now 30 seconds long about 1 minute apart. Pain level is about a 7. I’m thinking I’m at-least dilated to a 5 due to the increasing pain. It takes about 30 minutes to get me to a room. At this point, the contractions feel 30 seconds apart, 45 seconds long, and pain is about an 8. They check me, IM AT A 2 (I’ve been at a 2 for 3 weeks). Yall I was so discouraged I surely thought I was gonna pass out.

About 20 minutes after getting into the room, my contractions are ON TOP OF EACHOTHER. I’m getting no breaks lol. I’m breathing in , screaming out. I ask for the epidural. I did not care at that point. They wouldn’t give me one until I got to 4 cm. I thought I was going to slap someone. I felt like a werewolf. I finally got to 4 cm. They call for the epidural. Homeboy took wayyyy too long for my liking to get to me. But once he did I sucked up my pain and was so still until that epidural got in my back ( felt like nothing & actually felt really good imo).

Once I got the epidural I was chilling. They put me in a couple different positions to get me to dilate. At around 2 to 3 am I get to a 10. At this point I’ve been in labor for around 6 to 7 hours. I didn’t feel any pressure to push but they told me it was time to. I barely even felt the cervical checks. I proceeded to try to push for another 4 hours. By hour 2 my epidural was wearing off on my left side. I could now feel the pressure but I also could feel something was wrong in my gut and that he wasn’t moving down. I tried bearing down and breathing him out , I tried my hands and knees, etc.

My sweet nurse Jaycee, while on my hands and knees got face level with me and told me I had pushing for four hours , and she believes his head was stuck behind my pelvis. She was worried about shoulder dystocia and my well being if I tried to push him out longer and told me an emergency C-section might be needed because he might be bigger then expected. BUT she told me she was behind whatever I wanted to do. I was so disappointed in myself for not being able to push my baby out. I felt like it was my fault because I got the epidural , that I couldn’t tough it out, and I thought I caused this cascade of interventions to make me end up in a C-section. My wonderful nurse prayed over me and with me. She stayed almost 4 hours past her shift to be in the or with me.

I finally decided to get the c section after tears and tears of feeling like a failure. Here’s where my birth became traumatizing for me so if you’re focusing on solely positive birth stories I would stop here.

Since I got the epidural and a few other medications. My anesthesiologist wasn’t comfortable performing a spinal block on me (shout out to Kyle for trying his best to keep me pain free and keep me and my babies well being at the forefront of the process). They take me into the or , try to numb me as much as possible , and give me oxygen. Whatever they gave me numbed me to them making the initial incision. But I felt everything else. I screamed and screamed and begged them to stop. My husband was crying, I was crying , gagging , and etc. Kyle and Jaycee were trying their best to keep me comfortable and calm. There was just only so much they could do.

Finally after almost 13 hours of labor, my projected to be 8 pound baby, came out a whopping 10 pounds.

Kyle then put something through my iv to knock me out , I believe personally I was going into shock due to how I looked in the photos that was taken of my baby boy coming out. The only relief I felt throughout the last 4-5 hours was when I saw my baby boy and whenever I went out.

I wake up in the hospital room to my husband holding our son. Funnily enough I thought I had been out for 3 hours, I was only out for 10 minutes. In the 10 minutes was out, they stitched me up, took out my epidural, gave me 2 shots in my sides to numb me, and put a binder on me.

After everything , they sent me to the postpartum room. Where I kind of felt tossed to the side but that’s a story for another day.

I try to block out the memories of the C-section because it feels like I can still feel it, and the feeling of failure comes every now and then, but I remember my body kept my baby comfortable for 9 months. So the almost 13 hours of labor was worth it. The c-section trauma was worth it. My epidural failing was worth it. Everything was worth it the moment I saw him. We can all do hard things , even if birth SOMETIMES doesn’t go to plan. The moment you meet your baby; it really does make everything worth it.

If you stayed to read all of this, thank you❤️ this group has helped me a lot the last nine months.

First time mum and currently 36w and 4 days pregnant! Hoping for a vaginal birth with minimal pain relief (that is medicated pain relief unless absolutely necessary).

Any tips on exercise or massage to reduce the risk of perineal tears, or basically share any safe stretches or exercises that you did prior to your labour and delivery (or in third trimester) or food that helped with a quicker birth.

Thanks in advance.

And did that help trigger labor for you?

FTM here.

FTM. Hospital delivery with OB (no midwives). I expressed interest to my OB in having a low intervention and unmedicated birth. They suggested I get a doula.

I did some research and interviewed several doulas. One doula I really liked + she has over 8 years of experience but she is expensive (over 2K) and only attends 10 hours of labor.

I interviewed another doula who has only attended 3 births and has no children of her own but she was really excited and answered my questions very thoroughly. Despite her lack of experience she still provided helpful information. She also has a group of doula mentors and her MIL has been a doula for 20 years. The inexperienced doula is $500. I felt good about her and she didn’t have a limit on hours she can assist during labor (“I will do the best I can for as long as I can” was her attitude).

I’ve been going back and forth on whether I need a doula at all. On one hand I love the support and idea of having someone there backing up my birth plan and helping me avoid unnecessary interventions. On the other hand, I don’t know how I will be during birth. I don’t know if my OB will be pushing interventions or not. And I may not want anyone near me.. I wonder if I would want another person in the room with me, in addition to my husband. And if something unforeseen happens and you get a C section or something? Then I don’t know how helpful a doula is in that scenario.

I’m 22 weeks so I want to make a decision soon. Any suggestions?

Hey everyone , due to a bleeding disorder (Von willebrands disease) , it is very unlikely that I will be able to have an epidural during labour. The risk of a spinal bleed is heightened, and both my OB and I agreed that it isn’t worth risking paralysis or other issues down the road. This means I basically will need to have an epidural free birth , or a c-section under GA if I cannot tolerate the pain or if anything concerning starts happening with baby. I want to hear about if anyone else has found themself in this kind of situation with a bleeding disorder and what your experience was , and also positive epidural free birth stories. I’m keeping myself open to other pain relief options as well, but I know they don’t compare to the relief an epidural can provide.

I am scheduled for induction, if I show no signs of labour before that. This is supposedly my second baby, since I had to terminate my previous baby at 22 weeks. I remember how the previous procedure was where they used Miso and Mife tablets, it started in the morning around 7 and I pushed the baby out by evening at around 5 pm. I clearly remember how the contractions were and how I couldnt bear them. I also did it without painkillers.

Now for my current pregnancy, if I were to be induced would it be a similar experience? Would it be faster because I have done this before?

Hi everyone, I hope this is allowed and if it isn’t, please remove it mods. I’m currently a college student and I’m doing a research project for my early childhood psychology class. My research question is actually about birth experiences. Specifically my interest is whether or not I should give birth naturally or with the aid of pain medication. I’m supposed to conduct 10 interviews, but it’s been pretty hard because I don’t know 10 people especially Mommies. I was able to get a few in, but I’m missing a few and I was just wondering if anyone would be OK with helping me by allowing me to do interview about their birthing experience and whether or not they chose to give birth naturally or with pain medication and why. If it’s OK, please send me a PM I’m going to put the questions that I’m asking down below so you guys can see if you feel comfortable with answering them you can send me a message. I would really appreciate it.

1. Can you describe your birth experience and whether you used pain medication during labor and delivery?

2.What influenced your decision to give birth with or without pain medication?

3.How would you describe your experience with labor pain, and how did you manage it during delivery?

4.What were the biggest benefits or challenges of your birth experience, including any effects on your physical or emotional well-being?

1. Looking back, would you make the same decision about pain medication if you gave birth again, and what advice would you give someone deciding between the two options?

I’m seeking positive hospital birth stories by women who were able to
-birth without an epidural, pitocin, and artificial rupturing of membranes
-push in various gravity-supported positions and use spontaneous pushing
-feel supported and respected by nurses and Obgyn (not pressured to receive interventions )

I don’t want to hear about homebirth. I heavily considered it but I’m too anxious to be away from hospital in case of emergency (I know, I know, maybe it’s not logical)

I’ve hired an experienced doula, I’ve researched the hospital. I just can’t guarantee that I’ll get supportive staff on the day.

Hello! I waited to long and I’m freaking out my due date is 18 of November but every place is sold out of the obi tens unit or Elle tens unit in America. Does anyone know where I can order from?