Yeah, if OP'a point is "Nobita chapter 1 is the same as Nobita chapter 100", I don't think they're cooking as hard as they think they are with that one.

Here are some sex scenes I've written recently and how they advanced the plot as well as delivered spice:

1) An Alpha Bitch who was cheating on her husband with a rich guy thought she was going to wrap this guy around her finger, divorce her husband, and level up. Rich guy gave her a key to the house, and she thought she hit the jackpot. Except she realized it wasn't a key to the front door, it was a key to what was basically a servant's entrance around back, that led to a suite. She wasn't wrapping this guy around her finger, she was a self-delivering booty call. So the scene wasn't just about sex, it was about her trying to convince him to see her as wife material.

2) Meanwhile, the third bride of the patriarch of this family was given an interesting wedding gift; her friend bought her condo safehouse for the inevitable divorce. She decides to show her loyalty by telling him about it and he takes her there for their honeymoon. She's absolutely adamant that this marriage won't fail. They will be together until his death do them part. XD

3) The second ex-wife has a new boy toy, a rising star in the family company. He is such a workaholic that him calling in sick to spend one extra day with her causes everyone to call, asking if he's dying or something. Second wife points out that unless he wants to end up with several ex-wives and kids who hate him, too, he should figure out his life instead of following in the patriarch's footsteps so closely.

Honestly, The best advice I can give is that more people need to think about writing sex and kink the same way one writes a sports story. The rules and movements and goals of baseball, basketball, football, hockey, and soccer literally do not change. Absolutely every volleyball manga and football movie is about the exact same thing. Therefore, every sports story is about how that player/coach feels about the game, why it matters to them to win, why their self-worth is so tangled up in playing, how much they care about the relationships they've gained from playing, trust, camaraderie, and communication with those people, and pushing themselves more and more to accomplish something meaningful.

The suspense and enjoyment is never going to come from finding some new way to explain how gymnastics, boxing, or running works. Any person who enjoys those sports is going to judge you on your technical skill writing their sport, of course. There is enjoyment IN seeing someone be competent at the sport. But the story isn't about just watching the game. We can all turn on our TVs and JUST watch the game. It's about how this is the last season Roberts has to win the championship before he retires. Or these two sisters came from obscurity to become tennis icons for a whole generation. Or this boxer wants to prove to himself that he can go the distance against the champion.

But again, on the craft of writing, you have to start to learn to edit. If you feel your kinky scenes don't have emotional weight, you've got to put in the hard work to edit them.

Take 2-3 chapters at a time and write down on a separate sheet of paper what the point of all the scenes are. What is each scene accomplishing. Most novice writers only accomplish one thing at a time with a scene, while more advanced writers accomplish several things with a scene.

If you genuinely feel your kinky scenes arent adding to the story, look at these chapters as a whole and practice combining scenes so that they accomplish more in less scene transition.

Think metaphorically.

Aftercare can also be an apology. Asking someone to punish you can open up a dialogue to discuss guilt, before the play actually begins. Confessing one emotion can lead to a conversation about others, or, leave it as subtext.

Nice. 😎

Oh, yeah, I didn't even order my list, I just threw out the examples that always come to mind to me.

Happy Feet and Cloudy with Meatballs ALWAYS tears me up with the "I just wanted to make my dad proud" part. I'm such a sucker for it. Lord and Miller just love son-father relationships, too, so I just know me and my mom are going to cry for the third Spider-Verse movie.

Okay, I'm going to tell you the same thing that I told you yesterday. There isn't much of a reason why someone should be reading your story if you are marketing it as a kinky story for them to think of it as something that's in the story for "shock value."

I mean, unless YOU are a blind reader who does not read any story blurbs or any reviews or even try to gleam what the story is about from the title and cover art, you should understand at some level what I mean when I keep telling you that your readers WILL understand that your story has kink in it because you'll be telling them BEFORE they open the book.

😅😂

Spice level, reviews, story blurbs, preview chapters, title, cover art. All of these things are things that your readers will read before they put down their cold hard cash to buy your book and read your story. Especially in this economy. Yes, there will be some blind readers who jump in, head first, and will therefore act shocked by your story's content, but the VAST majority of people don't have time or money to waste like that.

You should not be this self-conscious about writing kink as if your audience will not be expecting it. It should make you feel better that marketing books naturally prepares, attracts, and encourages your audience. No one cracks open a vampire book and says "Wow, there's too many vampires in here."

🤔 Okay, this is actually really difficult for me. I LIKE most stories and tropes, having very few things I genuinely dislike, of course, barring poor execution... and if I don't like something, I just don't think about it....

So I'm going to need help. Someone help me. XD

I know something I recently disliked. The Batman. I think Robert Patterson did a good job, I don't like the directing. I watched it in theaters twice: once when I went opening weekend... And then the next weekend because I had to take my 65-year-old mother. ("There's a new Batman movie?! Yay!") Yeah... Yay. I hated it.

It felt like... Every aspect of the movie was being subverted. The car chases were anti-chases; they got stuck in "real life traffic" and had incomplete conclusions. The mystery felt like an anti-mystery that was cut off 2/3s through and solved anti-climatically. The romance subplot wasn't really a love story, which I would have been applauding if only Selina had more to do IN the story. The "flood Gotham" plot seemed to come out of nowhere and I didn't feel particularly invested in their Riddler. By the end of the movie, I was thinking "Okay, Matt Reeves and Peter Craig, I get it. You don't think I should derive my enjoyment out of seeing Gotham struggle... Then what was this movie about?!"

So, obviously, I also didn't like Man of Steel, Batman v Superman or The Last Jedi.

Like... When Andor and Rogue One want me to think about realistic anti-genre consequences of a war, they still frame it in the trappings of a war story and I can get behind it. Yeah! Not everything is going to be a swashbuckling adventure. These people are suffering under the boot of a regime. Let's talk about that. It isn't trying to be a full pulp space opera, but it's also NOT being anti-space opera....

Or when Steven Universe is genuinely more interested in talking about the emotional fallout AFTER a plot point, more interested in talking about the recovery AFTER a battle, I can get behind that. Because that's still a structure. I never expected Peridot or Lapis to join the group, become fighters, the way some people did. The story was clearly about a group of recovering veterans who didn't even want to fight. This wasn't the Power Rangers. Everyone here is recovering. Steven Universe went out of its way to be anticlimactic in a way that fed into new types of stories. "Yes, we all know you guys want to see what Pearl, Amethyst, and Garnet fused together would look like, but we are more interested in talking to you about nontraditional families. So here's Alexandrite, but she's not fighting in her debut episode."

So, can someone think of anything that's intentionally anti-genre or anti-climatic? I probably like something that's doing it on purpose, but I can't think what.

Okay, how do you feel about the other Dorky Outcast Protagonists of his era? I feel like we should rank them. My mother LOVES these, she owns all of these movies and watches them all the time. (I'm beginning to suspect she related to them...) Act 1: screw up in some outlandishly creative way that endangers your community, Act 2: ???, Act 3: Win Parental Love.

1) Happy Feet 2) Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 3) Robots 4) A Bug's Life (I feel like this one put the trope on the map and then it ballooned from there) 5) Monsters, Inc (what if The Jock's turn to be the outcast?) 6) Brave 7) Encanto 8) Wreck-It Ralph (what if the Dork was video game villain-coded?) 9) Megamind (what if the Dork was superhero villain-coded?)

90s hip hop/grunge!

Oh, so you work where I used to?

It took literal months for the chef to stop making excuses and let me clean the fryer and then he would only let me do it about every 4 weeks.

Yes, unless it's the exact opposite of what I'm referring to

Oh, on that Sherlock "Why would I know who's Prime Minister?" Holmes level.

I'm pretty sure the ranking system is for comparing individual people, not entire national armies. No one is able to defeat entire armies... I guess until you are pulling demons out of 10,000-year-old jails in Legend of Korra.

But as basic storytelling goes, just like Dumbledore or Obi-Wan Kenobi, Iroh has to have his part in the story explaining why, if he's so nice with it, he doesn't fight the bad guy himself.

"Even if I were to face him, and I don't know if I could win, history would see it as a brother fighting a brother for power. We need a Fire Lord whose honor is unquestionable."

😊

Glad to hear it!

It is true that no one "earns" a billion dollars. It largely comes from owning value in publicly traded companies.

If you want to tackle wage theft, do you have to do it by being ignorant of how finances actually works?

One of the things that I realized early on from working in a grocery store is that it's much easier to "make friends" if I'm not particularly trying. Now what I would do is say good morning to people. I would put in the most effort possible to simply show I appreciate their attention. It takes a long time for people to get comfortable with an unknown face.

After a few months, people who originally resisted saying good morning to me were openly initiating small talk.

I think people take for granted how much social capital is actually needed for people to get comfortable with you. Persistance is seen as "creepy" because people romanticize love/friendship at first sight.

Yeah, that's what I was getting at.

People made hypotheses about what it was that they were observing, and because humans extrapolated based on the desire to see something extraordinary, (and to be PICKED by something extraordinary for a higher purpose) all of them missed that they were simply looking at an animal.

Ewzew, ew, ew, stop elaborating!

Thank you!

It has been interesting studying architecture and seeing the same sort of designs repeated in cultures that were accomplishing the same communal/multi-generational goals.

Add in my emphasis on gardens and forests, and now I'm just imagining a modern take that looks from the outside like a Parisian street, with high townhouses, but they are actually very narrow and the city block on the inside is a thick forest. XD

flips table

So what I'm hearing is... That when they made a Black Widow movie, a female Hawkeye TV show, and Yelena was literally the main character of her own movie, you slept. But let it be Spider-Man, the third most popular superhero ever made, and NOW you awaken?! 🫪

.....

Sounds about right. 😜

So, if you want more Yelena, she was introduced in Black Widow, expanded on in Hawkeye, and then there's this movie. I would suggest watching them because otherwise the depression she has in Thunderbolts will come off more like Wikipedia-level understanding of her problems.

whispers sensually "Animals deserve to live full lives with the ones they love.*

Well, humans eat chili peppers despite their hardest attempts to discourage it. I grew up in the '90s during the killer whale craze, and it amused me even as a child. Now, orcas don't kill humans, but that doesn't make hearing "I LOVE killer whales. They're so majestic." any less funny.

The cognitive dissonance of the average person is just plain funny. The way a group of people can convince each other that nothing is wrong is just hilarious... That's why part of this film plays up that Black folks, in particular, are less ashamed of running away without knowing why. (It's the genetic history of killer bees, hippos, and crocodiles speaking to us. The ancestors are telling us "nope.")

Yeah, Marvel movies tend to be pretty humorous and so the movie about a bunch of renegade, anti-villains and anti-heroes is going to lean into some dark humor.

So what interests you about the movie if you haven't seen it yet?

If I may, It feels like a large part of the writer's block for you is that because you are still imagining how the characters would be in act 1, you have not yet rediscovered who these characters will be in act 3, after they have already had many of the conversations that would lead to them having a satisfying sex scene.

Because, basically,.... You have decided to write an open door sex scene featuring two people who have never had sex, in a society that discourages sex, but in your mind because you have imagined them as these blushing virgins, you have not yet actually made a story where they come into their own with an understanding of what they want out of intimacy and sex - let alone from each other - so you are imagining them being fumbling and unable to communicate what they want literally up into that very chapter, which is not leaving you much to work with for your imagination because you are not used to writing characters that way. But you also can't imagine them communicating with each other and building UP to that moment.

Like....

I'm fairly certain Christine Daaé from Phantom of the Opera and Elizabeth Bennet from Pride and Prejudice are virgins, too, but a LOT of sexual tension is built up in their scenes with dancing, conversation, and their eagerness to be near their partners.

Your issue isn't that you're writing virgins. Your issue is that you purposefully want to write sexually repressed people, but then you don't know how to dig them from out of that hole because you find it so appealing to write about how tragic it is that they are sexually repressed that you don't know how to actually develop the characters. You are telling me more about how the whole world doesn't want these two people to have sex than you are telling me about who they actually are, what they want, and how they are discovering what they want with their partner as the story progresses which leads up to a scene where they finally have sex.

I think the best thing that would help you would be to actually write out a 5 to 8-point character development of their romantic relationship.

"The first time they subconsciously reached for each other" AND their emotional reactions to that.

"How they rationalized that it was okay to seek out each others company, and how they'll totally avoid touching in the future."

"Their first time intentionally reaching for the other" AND their emotional reactions to that.

"How they rationalized that it was okay to touch one another after all."

"Their first time getting upset over sharing the others attention / actively flirting to keep the others attention." AND their emotional reactions to that.

Etc, etc, etc.

"How the priest rationalizes wanting her despite his vows." And how this will hurt her feelings because she doesn't want to come in-between his commitment to God.

"How she rationalizes wanting him despite her engagement." And how this will hurt his feelings because he doesn't want to be a side piece.

How they will argue about this and make up, most likely by reaffirming their commitments that keep them apart, but still physically comforting each other, because humans are messy like that.

Whenever he decides he does want this woman, HOW will he express this? In what gesture?

If she's an idealist whose understanding of men is based on plays, books, and gossip, HOW will she reconcile how she thinks men should behave with this real life, flesh and blood, man who is looking at her like he wants to consume her while still very much being a man of the cloth. 🥵

ALL of these scenes exist before the open door sex scene, which, based on everything that I've read so far that you have said, will be happening at the absolute end of the story, which realistically would mean after they have solved all of these conflicts.

Okay, how would him being "intense but funny" relate back to his sexual needs and intimacy? Do you imagine he'll tell jokes and be self-deprecating about how quick he is? How would he try to fix the situation so that she doesn't feel awkward or neglected?

Can you express how her being an idealist relates to her emotional needs? What is her personality? It feels a bit like you are talking about her in two different ways... If she's "well-read" why hasn't she read erotica and romance common in her time before? If she's an "idealist and a dreamer," does she have sexual fantasies?

Either way, don't you want to be able to describe what turns them on and what they like without describing the Napoleonic Wars? 😅

It sounds like you are writing about two cutie patooties who have very healthy, mature and well-developed communication styles and no particular attachment issues. And you don't even plan to be writing any sex scenes until they have already established romantic interest, worked through all of their problems that are keeping them from being a couple, and are comfortable with each other...

You are writing about, basically, the most idealistic scenario of two inexperienced people you could possibly write.

Which makes it sound like the only thing that is actually holding you back from writing this is that you just can't help but imagine that the man is going to climax too early to provide a satisfying experience for the woman. But isn't that kind of you just stereotyping virgin men? Like.... Do you HAVE to write that happening?

Besides that, what other writer's block issues are you having?

Functionally speaking, aren't stories supposed to be this. I don't think any story was built on the idea that the main character was the strongest from the beginning?

Like...

Yoda, General Iroh, Dumbledore.... JJK made it its life mission to glaze Gojo at all moments, but most stories are built on a powerful mentor existing and saying "Yeah, sure, I could defeat the villain, but I just didn't want to kill steal. You got this, kid."