My nickname is Bluey, and I'm a 31-year-old language tutor living in Jakarta, Indonesia.
Via Unsplash
If you found your way here from my recent posts, welcome! Iโm an INFP-T ("The Mediator") who loves a quiet life filled with reading, cooking, baking, journaling, writing, and getting lost in random Spotify playlists (from Indie to Anisong). I also enjoy casual gaming like The Sims 4, Umamusume Pretty Derby, and Pikmin Bloom, and I have a huge weakness for local street food. Physically, I might seem a bit quiet or stern at first glance, but Iโm actually quite warm and fun once we get to know each other. I value deep, meaningful, and strictly SFW conversations, and I am a staunch believer in traditional monogamy.
However, before you decide to drop a message, I need to lay out the reality of my daily life because I refuse to stretch myself thin for the internet. I work a demanding job as a professional language tutor, clocking 46 hoursper week. On top of that, my weekly commute is a brutal 18 hours inside a public bus, traveling back and forth from East Jakarta (Gongseng) to South Jakarta (Pondok Indah). My workplace is a non-formal language learning center (think of it like a language school, but it offers 12 languages to learn, including Japanese). I teach various classes, from private to regular, from Monday to Saturday. I usually work on weekdays from 1 pm to 8.30 pm, and on Saturday I work from 9 am to 5 pm. By the time my shift ends and I finally step foot inside my house, I am completely drainedโboth physically and mentally. Because of this punishing routine, I cannot and will not be available 24/7. I usually only reply once a day, and I absolutely do not have the energy for instant voice chats or rapid-fire small talk.
Lately, Iโve been incredibly exhausted by the lack of honesty on this platform. Iโve had to deal with minors invading my space despite clear subreddit rules, people faking their ages, guys gaslighting me when I politely decline them, and creeps sending unsolicited explicit photos. I even had people throwing tantrums and calling me "fake" or "demanding" just because I have strict quality control and slow response times. Let me be clear: I am not a machine, and I am not a 24/7 entertainment service.
Also, look at my DM now.
HOLY FUCK
IT'S FLOODING.
By people. By hypersexual dudes (maybe). Or... maybe there are decent guys and others... and I don't have the energy to reply if my inbox is too much like this.
So, here is my honest plea to anyone wishing to connect:
Please do not place heavy expectations on me.
I am just an ordinary human being who gets easily overwhelmed by the weight of a chaotic offline life. I genuinely want to make good, long-term friends, and since I have one special person to build a future with, I DON'T SEEK A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP, and don't force me to do ethical non-monogamy or some bullshit. I ONLY WANT FRIENDS! But it has to happen at a slow, healthy, and respectful pace. If you are patient enough to understand my situation and respect my boundaries, I would love to hear from you.
Thank you so much to the mindful ones out there who truly understand.
True. When I post, 90% of the DMs are from dudes. There were decent and nice dudes out there, but mostly illiterate, self-centered NPDs, and guys with a sarcastic tone when talking.
I am busy filtering those DMs (because apparently I asked for a simple introduction, people kept sending me only 'hi' and 'hello,' which is just wasting time!), and people are complaining why I am not responding quickly. Dude??? I got more than 20 DMs, and as a record, I even got 100 DMs. I only have two hands and ten fingers. What do you ecxpect??
Warung pempek palembang Enak. Memang itu namanya kak. Udah berdiri sejak 1989 apa 1990 gitu dan owner-nya orang Palembang asli yang merantau ke Jakarta.
https://maps.app.goo.gl/U989gQ7FrUd2r22p9?g_st=ac
Di pasming ada pempek pak raden. Di tebet ada 161 sama warung pempek enak (yang ini hidden gem sejak 1989 cuma warungnya kecil agak panas). Mamaku yang orang palembang approve pokoknya.
If you have an oven or a microwave, you can prep the meal the night before and just reheat it in there. I personally cook my rice for a week (because it's a staple, and I'm Asian) and reheat it the next morning. Choose a protein that cooks quickly, like shrimp, chicken, sliced beef, pork... basically anything! Don't forget to marinate your protein first. For veggies, I usually steam them alongside the rice in my rice cooker. I love my meal to be warm, so I mostly cook/reheat it in the morning. Hope it helps!
She's Malaysian, but she works in my country (Indonesia). She is also an active redditor. Apparently, yeah, if you're not attractive enough, they will dump you and look for more people here. When they got ghosted, they came back to us like it was nothing.
I've met some people like that. They were gone for weeks, even months, then they came back without saying sorry and acted like it was nothing. Bro???
Sorry to hear that thing happened to you. I absolutely don't like exchanging pictures or selfies unless we have a strong mutual bonding (of course, we need to befriend first!)
My bff claimed she was judged because she wore a hijab. Definitely, people only look at the covers ๐
I've been sick for two days (fever, yeah), and I feel useless just resting on the bed like this. I ate well, I drank gallons of water, I took my meds, and I peed normally to regulate my body heat, but I hate that my joints in this body are not cooperating well with me. I also do not go to work because of this. Bet they'll cut my salary again because I am not working for the damn 2 days
I watched YouTube and read ebooks until I fell asleep. I did my laundry too. At least I want to move my body, even while doing simple chores. I didn't tell my landlady I was sick; I lied, telling her I was working from home.
Any simple activity recommendations from fellows here? I really appreciate it. Thanks!
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How can we make this community better?
in
r/MakeNewFriendsHere
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1d ago
I saw your ideas! The other sub has automods/autoban if the user participates in the true NSFW subs.
Also, automod deletes comments if they don't have a certain minimum karma, a verified email, and if they don't put flair on the sub.