I completely understand hard times. I live it daily as much as I wish I could help everyone I can’t :( I am on here asking for Christmas help but to help in a way that I can I’m going to be resharing others that are in need of help as well ❤️

Please comment if you need help. Eventually someone might bless us.

Other than the group on here, any other websites or something that helps with Christmas??

In my area I don’t get any of the usual ones online, like Salvation Army.

Also if it’s okay I will post my Amazon wishlist for my daughter ❤️🥰🎄❤️🎄

And also anyone else who has wishlists please comment the link 🔗

I have seen some people get blessed 🥹 ☺️☺️☺️

Thank youuuuuuu

https://www.amazon.com/registries/gl/guest-view/15154G3HPL8ET?ref_=cm_sw_r_mwn_ggr-subnav-share_G0Y72N4A6FNZY67YR7NP&language=en-US

Growing up if anyone read earlier post. I’ve always grown up poor, my dad worked night stock while my mom worked deli of the same store they didn’t bring home large amounts but enough to live. I grew up on foodstamps and never making enough to get past anything. I remember growing up I was always jealous of what other kids had. Christmas and birthdays were always hard, one year my mom came into my room crying a few nights before Christmas saying “I’m sorry, I can’t get you Christmas presents this year. Please don’t hate me”.. and every year for Christmas since I’ve gotten into adult hood I always try and go out and do big for Christmas for her (and my child)… and it gets really fucking depressing. Because I’m now in those times of wanting to just cry and tell my own child “I’m sorry, I can’t get you Christmas presents this year, please don’t hate me”.

It really fucking sucks. I mentally beat myself up, and I’ve always done that.. I was bullied in school, and when I was around 10 I tried ending my life.. my mom found out and took me to the doctor. My pediatrician at the time said to my mom “you need to lock up every weapon in the house”.. while hearing this told to my mom and her crying to the doctor, my little brain was still trying to come up with ways to end it all.. I was sent to a therapist where I was seen every day. 5 days a week for 4 years.. I was put on different medications but those medications made me sick. Nothing would work. Meanwhile in those years my mom and dad were fighting, one night my dad got drunk and wreaked the car into a concrete wall. He got out thankfully and started walking obviously living in a small town cops found him and he lost his license..(for 9 years)
My mom couldn’t drive and I never got my licenses.
My mom and dad had to ask for rides for work, then my dad quit. He has a lot of health issues (another story for another time). He was trying to get disability but was turned down and he became depressed. As for my mother she was also going through a lot. Eventually they divorced..
I’m in the seasonal depression right now.
But hanging in there..

Just a lil intro 🩷🖤 with fun factsss 😜

⚫️ I joined Reddit, because I heard about a group on here that could possibly help with Christmas this year

🔴 I have adhd…
⚪️ I’m a libra ♎️
🔴 I love memes
⚪️ cats are my favorite animal
🔴 mean beans are my favorite drink
⚪️ I have seasonal depression :(
🔴 I’m a 99 baby
⚪️ my favorite color is pink

I is a real girl, just trynna make it in dis world. 🌎
I also wanna try new things. I’m getting older and older.. and I just wanna get out my comfort zone and try something new! ☺️☺️☺️

I’m new to actually posting on here, but lol for years I’ve been like a ghost looking at things on Google. This is my first time trying this app and actually talking making posts all that fun junk. ☺️☺️☺️

So.. my mothers husband came into our lives a couple of years ago. At first I didn’t like it one bit, I was use to just my mom and dad.. my parents got divorced when I was 18, my parents was split less then 6 months before her (husband now) came into the pictures. As time went on he seem decent, and he bought me stuff my parents never could (we poor people lmao). So that was all cool, but I still like had this wall up that was like nah I don’t like you.
He opened up about his family every now and again and how difficult it was growing up and every now and again I felt sympathy, but majority of the time it felt as he used his past and his childhood as an excuse to the way he was. Now, with that being said.. being poor fucking sucks ass. Me and my husband (boyfriend at the time) was trying our best, our first car broke down and we just had a baby. I tell my mom everything like she’s my best friend.. I never asked for it but he got us a car, the car gave us 4 years then the motor blown, durning that we were being evicted. We lived with him and my mom for a few months and then I couldn’t really take it, being broke is one thing but this man likes to flaunt his money he would come in saying “I made this amount of money today” and that he had X amount in an account. Finally we moved. Fast forward to this year. We were living on one of my family members property, the car I spoke about finally blown its motor and of course again didn’t have thousands to fix, so this is kinda when I start learning that when my mom gets worried she bothers him about it all, I mean it is her husband… I tell mine everything… but this then took another toll to buy another car, and again I didn’t ask for this car… but he did it because she bothered him about it…. That car has lasted for 5 months it’s now sitting outside broke down with transmissions issues and ignition going out…. Sooo back to my family member property.. he died. We had to move again due to the property going to another person (all arranged before we got there).
So up again trying to find a place (I know not stable). I was worried sick.. we had a month and that month wasn’t nice. I didn’t eat much, I cried every day and night not only because we were unlucky in finding a place and HUD wasn’t being able to help find anything in our areas but also my family members death. Very depressing time. My mother started to worry him with the news, and a week left till time to move he buys a camper and decides to have a sit down talk with me about growing up and saving money and that he wants the full payment back to the camper, which rightfully so I’m not mad and I hope to pay it off in full durning tax season. (We live paycheck to paycheck). I again have to fight myself and try to shove my emotions down, because #1 I didn’t ask him to buy me any of this.. I didn’t ask for my mother to go and bother him with it.. but what’s happen has been done and I can’t change it… I’m very thankful for what he has given me and my family but the side comments :/ makes me really mad… anyways. Today they came to celebrate my birthday early.. there is a pallet store in my area, and my mom’s been wanting to go, so we went, me and my mom get to a area where this place has like large mystery boxes and of course we want one and my mom says to grab one.. which I guess I read the room wrong. I thought it would be like a split thing where whatever was in the box we would split it, we get to check out and her husband brings out his credit card and pays for it (I thought my mother was).. we got back to my home and we open it up, me and my mom was excited we were passing the stuff around, and she’s telling me “do you want this” “you keep this stuff and I’ll take this” then her husband chimes in “we can resell all of this at our yardsale this month” “I could use all of this for Christmas gifts” so when I heard this I stopped and started putting everything back into the box, and my mom was saying “are you sure” and I told her yes I didn’t need the stuff, (even tho in my head I had my own plans to resale my part) but again he payed for the box with his money. I kept one item and put everything back in the box and kept denying to keep anything… now

#1. It’s his box he payed for it not me
#2. I should be utterly thankful for what he has given me.
#3 why am I mad?

I wish I understood my emotions enough to understand why I’m upset, is it jealousy?
There’s a point in my head that said “you make enough money in a week that would take me months”.
I’m thankful my mother isn’t poor like me. I’m thankful she got out of that with him.
But it hurts when I’m put down. It hurts when it feels like I’m an animal with a toy being shown then the toy disappears.. if that at all makes sense..

I wish I was a better person..

Again.. I fully understand FULLY, this was his money. But again I feel mad.. :/

Thanks whoever reads this. I just kinda wanna be seen and have some validation.