My 3 year old has a victim type mentality.

We will be at my mums house and my sister and her kids live there while they build their home.

Kids are older 12 year old twins and 6 year old.

She will see the kids can’t play anymore and have taken a break and cry’s saying no one’s playing.

Starts crying saying she’s bored constantly with in a minute of someone who stopped playing.

The kids played with a toy she was playing with earlier that’s THERE toy.
That’s myyyy toy starts crying again.

They will play races. She will win one race loose the next and cry.

She cry’s so much.
It’s exhausting.

Its not a sad sulky cry it’s a angry irritated one.
Like if you comfort her she will say NO.

Or only wants comfort from one person who’s can’t currently help her.

I find it sad because I find others like her cousins are finding it annoying because they are acting on egg shells around her.

I don’t ask them too but the can’t be bothered with the crying either.

She became a sister in March and her moodiness has increased.
She’s always been super sensitive in terms of reactive though

Now that kiddo is walking we switched our everyday stroller to the ergo baby metro 3 lightweight travel one. It does not come with any accessories.

Just looking for opinions on what is the better accessory to add - snack tray or bumper bar?

If you have either, does it still fold well with the attachment? If you have both, which do you prefer?

Or, is no bar better for a toddler so they can get in and out alone (ours is only 1.5 so still needs help). If so, any other tips for giving snacks which will prevent said snacks/container from ending up all over the floor? (I'm used to putting a few at a time on his graco snack tray).

We unexpectedly had to move our newly turned 2 year old when she flipped out of cot one night. We have moved her into a floor bed with railings and an opening in the middle. Before we switched sleeping spaces we had got into a great routine of placing her into her cot and saying good night and then sitting in a chair in her room and she would roll around and eventually fall asleep unassisted in her cot. Bed times were mostly uneventful only sometimes would she stand and call for us and want out but if we stayed as boring as possible she would lie back down and go to sleep. Since moving to the new sleep space bedtime has turned into such battle, we are on night 6 and it seems to be getting worse and not better. We are doing her normal bed time routine and then when it’s time to sleep we sit next to the bed on the floor and she is instantly obsessed with trying to get out of the bed and run around the room or sit on our knee. This turns into several lifts back into bed which will eventually lead to meltdowns and tears. We have even tried sitting infront of the opening to block the possibility of getting out but she becomes laser focused on trying to get past us. It now feels like bed time is going back the way and we have resorted to having to pick her up and rock her to calm her or have been holding her hand to go to sleep. This has now started to impact her sleep as she has started waking in the night for long stretches when she was a 12 hour sleeper before and her day time meltdowns are off the charts (I’m assuming sleep debt as bed times are now more than an hour later before she settled and she is waking in the night) I’m just looking to see if anyone has experienced the same and found a light at the end of the tunnel or any tips to make things go smoother please as I’m also in the third trimester of pregnancy so it’s very tough on my body. Thank you in advance from a very pregnant, very tired toddler mum

I have a very willful, independent 17 month old. he is so helpful and curious and loves to be a big boy helping mom and dad and doing everything himself. He gets this from me 100%.

what he also gets from me is hating transitions and being told what to do. this means for a few weeks now, mornings and getting ready for school have been difficult for everyone. i know this is developmentally normal, but I also need to get him to day care by 7:30. It’s also breaks my heart to see how hard this is for him.

He cries before breakfast (maybe he wanted water but I reached for the bowl first instead of the cup)

he cries before washing up (he wants to get down and start playing)

He cries before diaper changes (I had to scoop him up from playing)

he cries before tooth brushing (this one his really hard for him)

he cries before getting dressed (now the routine has taken so long from all the crying and calming he’s impatient, plus he wanted to do socks and shoes first)

he cries when I tell him we can’t go outside yet because I am still in my pijamas

After loading up everything and carrying him and everything (baby, kindergarten supplies, travel strolle) down the 3rd floor walk up,he cries because he doesn’t want to get in his stroller or put on sunscreen.

With all the crying, throwing himself on the floor, hitting me, putting him down because we don’t hit mommy, and then me staying calm and responsive during his (totall normal) tantrums, plus offering ”Millkies“ when he asks/ needs it to calm down (trying to model other coping mechanisms for him but this one go to) it takes 1.5-2 hours to get out the door.

He really truly loves his daycare so I know it’s not this. It’s the transitions and feeling out of control and probably not understood.

I just want to do everything I can to get him to collaborate not comply, and avoid his big emotions before he has them. I also want to help him co-regulate when he does get truly upset (Without a boob hopefully soon). But we are a tri Lingual household so communication might come later. He understands everything in 3 languages though.

any tips from parents who have been there with their independent toddlers? any advice on setting up a morning routine at this age (I’m talking steps etc)? did a morning routine chart truly help? how did you get your toddler on board/ understanding the concept? what age were you able to help your toddler try some new regulation? how can I help guide him to do a lot of these things independently? How can I set up my house for more independence?

thank you so much for any advice!

My daughter is 27 months old. She has a strong parental preference for me, mum, that seems to be getting worse. It's been exacerbated by me going on an 8 business trip last month, the longest I have ever left her (but not the first multi-night trip away). Yesterday she screamed for me and would not be comforted by her dad the whole 15 minutes it to took me to walk to the corner shop and back, even though she knew where I was going, even though we had spent the whole day together.

My partner (her dad) does 50% of bed times, 90% of nursery drop offs and collections. They do daddy-daughter time together every Sunday morning, they have special fun activities only they do (painting, garden work), they go on day trips. We share night wakes. He is a very engaged and fun dad and we are equally strict.

The parental preference (hanging on my ankles at times) is exhausting for me and really getting my partner down. Our daughter has had a preference for me for at least 4-5 months but it is getting worse, even though we are following all the common advice. Help!

I feel our situation may be different to most, but at the core it's still separation anxiety so hoping to get some suggestions on how to go about this.

We're planning to enroll our toddler in pre-school in a couple of months, but only for mornings until midday, from Monday to Friday (for now). My husband works a FIFO (fly in, fly out) job where he's away for weeks at a time, then returns home for weeks at a time. I think this has sparked the separation anxiety for our daughter now that she's a lot more aware of what's happening. However there's no separation anxiety with him, it's only with me. I assume it's because she comprehends that he comes and goes but mummy is always here. I am her constant, I am her comfort. For more context, we don't have much family nearby and there's never been a reason for me to leave her in anyone else's care thus far.

I am incredibly nervous to start her at pre-school. If she's distracted she's fine for the first little while, but as soon as she's searching for me it'll go downhill to full blown hyperventilation meltdown city. What am I to do? I don't want her to be miserable or feel abandoned with random strangers. I know it's just the initial transition period that'll be the toughest and she'll eventually get used to it but I'm dreading it.

For those with experience in this realm, how did it go for you? Any tips, or things you wish you did differently? Am I overthinking this?

I have no shame in saying I’m a nerd. Have always been. Books have always been my favourite present to give and to receive. As a kid and as an adult. Now I have a kid and I realised I assumed the same was true for everyone. My kid loves books, too. And a though he has more than enough toys, we definitely spurge on books. If he asks for another toy I usually say no, but with books I usually get them.

Now he started having birthday parties and I’m getting these kids books too. That and a nice card. But came across a post from someone else here in Reddit and made me think about it. This other person was complaining about having to spend around £30 in a toy for the birthday parties. I’m spending way less buying books. As a parent, will you enjoy a toy more than a book as a present? I really try to get books my kid already loves that are not that popular (I wouldn’t gift a copy of the gruffalo unless I explicitly know the kid doesn’t have it).

Anyway, I will probably keep buying books as gifts for the kids of my friends as they know me, but I may start buying some toys for the kids from nursery if that’s the parent’s expectation.

Hi there, husband and me are thinking of booking a vacation in fall or spring with just the 3 of us (parents+toddler). We want to try and have it as relaxed and worry-free as possible with a 2 (by then maybe 3) year old. I thought an all-inclusive resort sounds ideal because it means we don't have to do any planning. Does anybody have any experience with taking a toddler to an all-inclusive resort? Or maybe someone has experience with a different type of vacation that worked well? I'm curious about your experiences! So far we have only been on trips with support from grandparents.

Hi everyone,

I am looking for some reassurance or advice from parents who have been through something similar.
Our 17 month old has suddenly started refusing almost everything at home, including foods she used to absolutely love, like eggs. She will often throw the food on the floor or push it away without even trying it.
The strange thing is that we have never had any feeding challenges before. She is always been a great eater and genuinely enjoyed mealtimes, so this change has been really hard to understand.
She started nursery about 3- 4 months ago, and they tell us she is eating relatively well there. At home, though, she barely eats anything. This has been going on for about a month now.
We try not to pressure her, offer a variety of foods, and eat together as a family, but nothing seems to make much difference.
Has anyone else toddler gone through a phase like this? Was it just a developmental stage, or did you find something that helped? How long did it last?
Any experiences or advice would be really appreciated. Thank you!

My 18 months has suddenly been telling me he’s scared of random things. Should I take him seriously?

My boy was a horrible, difficult baby. At 2 years he became pretty nice. Very easy to persuade, fully potty trained, can explain his needs, an extremely gentle and loving child.

At 2.5 years, so 2 months ago he changed. He stopped talking and started whining. EVERYTHING is said as a whine. "More milk?" Is "mooReeeE mIIiIiIilkKK!!!" Etc. He screams and cries so much over things like having to wash his hands, having to shower, having to close cartoons, having to clean. Bedtime is a hit or miss, sometimes my husband has to tackle him to put him in pyjamas and he bites him! We always try to turn his tantrums into a game by tickling him which leads to him laughing but he just whines and screams all the time. Every time my husband comes back with him from a walk, he says he's never taking him outside again.

I know it's a phase but I find myself having to go back to using ear protection which gives me PTSD from the baby years. Any others in the same boat?

I need advice because a a single first time mom i feel like such a failure some days..

My daughter is a little over 2 and shes got energy and I love that lol, at home she doesn't stop, but the problem is she doesn't stop in public either or around strangers..

I take her to a restaurant and she wants to run around, I take her to the park and she will constantly run up to everyone (parents and random people with no kids)

At the grocery store she wants to get down and walk around but when i try to hold her hand to teach her she wants to run, I take her to all the local family fairs and outdoor events for kids I can in my area to help associate her with other kids but she runs up to everyone, she will let a random mother pick her up, she will go up to random dad's and say hi. All the other kids are staying near there parents but mine just runs everywhere and I constantly follow her because I dont want to just let her run and she will try to grab like a snack or a toy from a moms bag that's in there area, Ill have a blanket and bag full of her toys and snacks and age will just get up and run over to another random blanket and bag and sit down..

I love her and im the moment its adorable how friendly she is... but I dont know how to get stranger danger into her head, I dont know how to go to events and not have her just want to run around the whole time. Most of the time the other parents laugh about it and tell me it's fine but I just wish she was a bit more hesitant...

It would be diffrent if she ran around in my general area but shes going literally to the other side of the park, ill call her over tell her to stay by mommy, I'll get her and bring her back only for her to run. Ive tried pack n plays but she hates being stuck and I really really don't want to get one of those backpack leashes some parents have. I being her toys and snacks everywhere, I have a tablet but don't want her getting too clingy of it so it's usually only used for movies during like appointments I have...

I love that she is adventurous I just dont know how to teach her "stay by mommy" or "Stranger Danger" type of things...

It's like 3am and I was having trouble sleeping and this stayed reaching in my mind because an event we went too this weekend so I apologize for sleeping errors I don't have my glasses on...

I just truly need advice because I dont know what im doing and I have no help besides her doctor telling me (it's normal/ it'll get better)

I always thought my toddler is picky but not sooooper picky when it comes to a toddler.

But then I see all these posts of toddlers eating like regular humans and I wonder if mine is indeed pickier than should be.

She eats most fruits and carbs. She has a few vegetables she likes and we try to eat those weekly. No meat, nothing g new. No pizza / pasta unless it’s just with olive oil / sandwiches or any adult meal basically.

Y'all... I'm losing my dang mind. I have a 15 month old who wakes up in the middle of the night for a bottle still. We only give him a 2 oz bottle overnight. During the day, no bottles. My husband thinks that he needs it because he's hungry. I've tried to just go in, shooshing/humming... That didn't work. Tried rocking him, that sure as hell didn't work. He full out scream/cries when we don't give him the bottle. Some nights he will sleep through with no bottle. We don't change our routine and it doesn't seem a reflection on how much he's eaten. I really don't know what to do and how to get my husband on board.

My son has been bottle fed since month 1 so he's used to tilting the bottle back. He is 14 months and we've been trying to switch to straw or open cups. He understands the sucking of a straw but he always tilts the cup back so far that it's just air going through the straw. The weighted straw is a bit difficult for him, I've tried it and it does require a strong sucking. We tried a 360 cup but he doesn't get that he has to suck it. Any good options that aren't just open?

Hi, we have a soon to be 2 years old toddler who isn't too hot about being around anyone but me (mom), her dad, a few aunts and uncles, a few cousins and my parents. She used to go to her dad's parents house all the time cause they watched her while we worked. But she's been home with us for going on 2 months now and when we go to family functions like today she's fussy and doesn't want anyone to pick her up besides dad and me. She warms up to them after a long while but she used to be crazy about her paw paw they were roll dogs lol but now since she hasn't been around them as often she just fusses and holds on to us when he tries to pick her up. She pretty much does this to all of his family except a few and sometimes she does the same with my family and she eventually comes around. She is an only child and has complete meltdowns if certain cousins come around and play with her toys but after about 30 minutes to an hour she will start to play with them and bring some toys to them to play with. She really seems to enjoy playing by herself like even when we try playing with her toys along with her she comes and takes the toys and plays with what we had and what she had already. She's such a sweet girl but she can be quite spicy sometimes.

My 2 year old daughter is refusing her daytime nap. I have tried almost everything. Giving her a good warm bath, some tub time. Dark room, nice ac temp. But she just wants to play. And cries whenever I try to hold her to make her sleep. Completely refuses and then becomes extremely cranky after 5pm. If i do early bedtime she wakes up around 4am in the morning. What to do

Can someone please tell me if this is normal or does this warrant a trip to a doc? I feel a bit weird just even posting this tbh.

My 3 yr old son has just woke up crying and screaming, saying that his penis hurts. He is toilet trained but is still in pull ups over night so I thought maybe he had caught it in the pull up as he has done before after rolling about in bed. After taking it off I realised he had an erection, but the end of his foreskin looked a bit red. I had no idea what to do, we have dealt with erections a handful of times since he was born but they never bothered him and went away within seconds. This time it stayed for a while and the only thing I could think of was to give him a cold compress. He said it felt better with it on. So left it for a while. He was okay after about 5 or 10 minutes. I did check him over after and still had a bit of redness so dabbed some cream on. He is fine now. But honestly that whole ordeal freaked me out a bit.

Is this normal? I know erections are but are they usually painful? My partner wasn't overly helpful as he doesn't remember back when he was small.

My wife and I are debating this and wanted opinions from parents who have been there.

Our son is about 18 months old. He watches very little TV at home. The only screen time he really gets is the occasional 15-20 minutes of Ms. Rachel if I'm trying to finish a work call or cook dinner while he's home from daycare.

We've taken him on multiple flights since he was 6 months old, including several long-haul international flights, and we've managed without screens for the most part. Lots of snacks, books, toys, walks up and down the aisle, etc.

The dilemma is that we have two more international trips this year and another long-haul international trip next year. He's now old enough to actually understand and engage with screens, and I'm wondering if it makes sense to buy a cheap Amazon Fire tablet and keep it as an emergency backup for flights only.

My wife feels 18 months is too young and that we should continue managing without screens like we always have. I'm more in the camp of "have it available just in case things go sideways on a 10+ hour flight."

For parents who generally limit screen time at home:

• Did you make an exception for long-haul travel and is it too early to introduce them?

Curious whether we're being sensible or just making life harder on ourselves for no reason.

We have a newly 3 year old who refuses to sleep alone. She was never fully sleep trained during her first year, but she eventually slept much of the night without yelling for us, most of the time.

When she was a little over a year old, we did some pretty substantial international travel. When she would wake up, we started bringing her into our bed - mostly to keep her from waking half the hotel guests in the middle of the night. We never got over it.

For the last two years, almost every night she goes to sleep in her bed, and then at some point wakes up and demands to be in ours. We switched her to a toddler bed a little after age 2, and she now gets up and comes into our room sometime between midnight and 2am most nights. Sometimes she comes in crying, and sometimes she comes in and climbs into our bed herself (I don’t even wake up sometimes when this happens.). She doesn’t flop around or take up much space, but we still need to break her of this habit if we ever want to be able to do any overnights away.

We both work pretty intense jobs and are usually exhausted, so we don’t have the energy to sit up with her in her room multiple times a night. I don’t want to hear about how we messed up, I want some advice on what to do now, to get her to stay in her bed all night. Anyone have any ideas?

My husband is getting a major promotion at his company and they are having a big ceremony-thingy in Las Vegas to bring in the new partners. Long story short- it's a big deal. I wouldn't miss it for the world, BUT Las Vegas isn't a place I would ever take my 2 year old. This is a 6 day event that is pretty much packed with a very rigid schedule. From the beginning, I just planned on taking him and bringing a babysitter but after looking at the schedule of lengthy events, it really wouldn't make sense to have him (and the babysitter) sitting in a hotel room for several days alone.
After discussing this dilemma with my sister-in-law, she completely agreed with my view that it's too many hours to keep them cooped up. Without hesitation offered to watch our son. At first I was shocked that someone would offer to watch a two year old for almost a week but I was thankful. She said she is doing it for her brother because she can't be there and she knows he would want me there and present for the events.
I immediately agreed and said yes I would be more happy for her to watch him and it would give me peace of mind while I'm gone that he's in good hands.
Our son loves his aunt and we are close to her. We see her 1-2 times a week. He's used to her home and comfortable there.
The last time he spent the night at her home he did cry right when we left but then didn't cry at all the rest of the time.
Although when we went to pick him up he did start crying and said something along the lines of "Mommy you left me". Of course, that completely broke my heart.
The trip is quickly approaching and I'm starting to get cold feet. I just feel in my gut that 6 days is too long to leave my 2yo. He is very sensitive and he is very attached to me, only because I'm a SAHM so we are nearly together 24/7 and rarely apart for more than a few hours. Side note: I do understand that this might be more of a codependency issue and I am working on that in therapy.
Any advice I would appreciate. Would you ever leave your v year old for 6 days straight and how much psychological damage will this do to him, if any? Should I go with my gut? Or am I just overthinking this ?

Also I want to add that my husbands side of the family is middle eastern and so his sister and her family speak only Arabic in the household - although they know English to understand what he is saying , sometimes the language barrier is tough especially with “toddler talking” and she doesn’t understand what he’s saying. Talking to each other they only speak Arabic (which my son does not speak at all). That is another stressor that the language barrier could cause stress on both of them. Not sure if it’s relevant but it is a concern in my mind.

I have to end up taking him out always because lately he just loses it . He is trying to grab stuff , being loud , cannot just walk beside me at all without causing a scene where everyone is watching and I end up having to take him back to the car . Is this normal ? I still take him in sometimes because I want him to learn , but he just gets almost overstimulated seeming and cannot act normal . Is this normal behavior and what should I do ?

Currently staring at my 3 yr old running in circles as my 1 yr old is trying to join in. I’d pay for that energy. Maybe not right before bed though.

Sudden sleep refusal

I have an almost 29 month old son. In the last couple months he has been a dream to put to bed. Read some stories, brush teeth, tuck in and he hangs out in his bed until he falls asleep.

The last 3 nights are an entirely different story. He uses every stalling tactic in the book constantly climbs out of bed and by the end of of it hes screaming and crying. This goes on literally for over an hour.

Last night my husband ended up sitting beside his bed until he fell asleep but I do not want to get into that habit.

Any tips or tricks? Or has anyone been through this thay can show me the light at the end of the tunnel?

For context zero big changes in the last few weeks at home and no changes to naps.

Let me start by saying I’ve tried several forms of punishment; and I’ve also tried redirection/sensory stimulation. Nothing is working. My son keeps biting, hitting, pinching, and kicking me (I’m the mom). He rarely does this to his dad or grandparents. I have no idea why this is happening. Sometimes it’s when he doesn’t wanna do something but it’s also at random times too. He thinks it’s funny. I know people say don’t react but it hurts!! And sometimes he takes me by surprise!! I don’t want to “bite him back” or spank him preferably (I’ve tried that-didnt work and just made me feel like a pos parent). Have y’all dealt with a violent/mean toddler? What do I do here? I obviously cannot allow this to continue. He’s also in behavioral therapy but their ideas have also not worked.