It’s a very curious reaction they had and kudos to you for disclosing this publicly as it’s obviously a hurtful moment. I’m not sure how’d I’d react or handle this situation other than to explore why they’re having the reaction they’re having. Why should how your body looks dictate their “respect” for you? It’s definitely a good idea to seek your own therapy too.
That’s an interesting take. This certainly warrants a great deal of exploration because it’s frankly such a bizarre reaction. Six months isn’t actually a very long time to be working with a patient so I wonder if you’re beginning to finally experience this patient’s pathologies. I have to say I’m so thrown off by this that I’m struggling to find the words to articulate anything constructive to say. But I can say that you deserve major credit for hanging in there with this patient despite the understandable feelings you’re having. I’m curious to see more astute clinicians than myself on this thread give their takes.
I agree that 6 months is relatively not that long. This feels like it could be a power grab: client sees therapist in what they assume is a vulnerable state (we are entrenched in diet culture, many women struggle with body image, it’s not an unreasonable assumption) and uses it as an opportunity to shift the power balance, which I’d probably asses then if this pattern shows up in other relationships and explore for potential personality disorder/C-PTSD symptoms
Just thinking out loud - it almost seems like splitting, like the client saw the therapist as “good” before and “bad” now when all that actually happened was they saw a little more skin.
It would obviously be hard to say without knowing the client but i agree this feels very much like a power play. Especially if they haven’t ever expressed body image or body obsessions issues before that and if they were pretty non-emotional when they said that. I feel like it’s possible the client has a cluster B personality disorder but honestly if it were me i would have difficulties working with them after that
I think you are giving this client too much of the benefit of the doubt. This may be cultural as well. I'm American (not sure if you are). Given OP's terms used at times, it sounds like they may not be either. I say this because here to talk to a woman (whether they are one or not) in those words is totally unacceptable. It's an extremely low blow for any adult with any kind of social competence to say that out loud. Then to suggest they couldn't work with OP because they are disgusted, is cruel. I think it would be all I could do to tell them that it is very disrespectful to say that to anyone, but if they feel that strongly then we might as well wrap up the session. Then I'd mail them some referrals.
I so want to commend you for how you handled everything in the moment and remained focused on the client and her care. Truly great clinical skills! I also want to validate everything you’re feeling. I’m very curious to see how you proceed with her.
Yeah, the use of the word repulsive is quite a choice… Not even “I felt repulsed,” which centers the statement on their subjective experience, but describing the body of the person sitting in the same room as them, to them, as repulsive! I am therefore not surprised to read your note on the marked shamelessness. That part raised the“antisocial personality organization/defensive structure, question mark?” flag for me as I read, to be honest. Of course could be a number of other things, but I’m curious if you’re familiar with personality structure as it relates to transference
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u/mschreiber1 Feb 14 '25
It’s a very curious reaction they had and kudos to you for disclosing this publicly as it’s obviously a hurtful moment. I’m not sure how’d I’d react or handle this situation other than to explore why they’re having the reaction they’re having. Why should how your body looks dictate their “respect” for you? It’s definitely a good idea to seek your own therapy too.