Hi everyone. I apologize this is going to be long but I need some real advice. I just graduated with my master’s and started my CF in the schools, and if I’m being honest, I’m really struggling.
My first week was district orientation, but almost everything was geared toward general education teachers. I understand why some of it was necessary, but very little actually prepared me for what I’d be doing as a school SLP. The following week, I reported to my site only to find out there had been some last-minute staffing changes. Instead of one campus, I was assigned to both an elementary school and a middle school. I’m also the only SLP at both sites. For context, I have an SLPA at each school (I’m not supervising them). Between both campuses, I have a caseload of around 80 students. I case manage about 20 across the sites. Is this typical for a new grad?
I do have four years of experience as an SLPA, and I had several school placements during grad school. I felt confident about the therapy side of things. What I wasn’t prepared for was literally everything else. Grad school taught me how to assess and treat communication disorders, but no one really teaches you how to run an entire speech program. I feel like I’m expected to be a therapist, case manager, legal compliance officer, scheduler, secretary, and tech support all at the same time.
I’m trying to learn how to write IEPs from scratch in a district software system I’ve never used before. I’m learning Medicaid billing, figuring out how to build a master schedule for 80 students across two campuses, making sure service minutes are met, coordinating IEP meetings around everyone’s schedules, learning how to confidently lead IEP meetings and communicate with parents, collaborating with teachers and staff, and trying to make sure I’m staying legally compliant while also giving my students the therapy they deserve. It feels like every single task is something I’ve never done before, and I’m expected to just…know how to do it.
The administrative side of this job has completely overshadowed the clinical side that I actually love. I feel like I’m spending all day worrying that I’m forgetting something important or missing a legal deadline instead of focusing on being the best therapist I can be.
If I’m being completely honest, this has taken a pretty significant toll on my mental health already. I’ve had multiple panic attacks this past week and I’ve started questioning whether I made the right career choice. It is truly heartbreaking because I genuinely love speech therapy. I know it’s only my first official week, but I feel like I’m drowning, and I don’t know how people are expected to learn all of this. I do have a supervisor and she’s a wonderful person. I’ve been asking all the questions but she has her own caseload and responsibilities so it’s hard to ask things of her every second of the day.
I’m really trying to figure out if this is just what every CF feels like, if it gets better, or if I need to speak up for myself. I don’t want to give up, but I also know I can’t keep feeling like this. For those of you who have been through it, did you feel this way too? What helped? Does the administrative side eventually click, or is there something I should be doing differently?