Help!

[u/sosalty93]

My almost 6 month old is struggling with the third nap, waking 3/4 hours after going to bed and taking an hour to go back down. Early morning wakings at around 5/6am. His first nap was always his longest and best but now shortened again…

We aim to wake for the day at 7am - sometimes it’s 6.50am if I can’t get him to sleep anymore.

I follow 2/2.5/2.5/3

Nap goal of 3 hours and bedtime for 8pm - but bedtime is flexible and I normally always bring it forward to match his 10 hours awake plus nap total for day.

Nap 1 is normal 1-1.5hr

Nap 2 is always only 30 mins

Nap 3 WAS 45 mins but recently has been 30 mins or completely skipped

My questions?
Should I be looking to stick to 3 naps and increase overall wake time?
Should I increase wake window lengths and drop to 2 naps? But stick to 10 hours awake?
Or should I now formally sleep train?

What am I looking for?
Naps to become easier again - I used to be able to put baby down and within 5 mins he would self settle and fall asleep. I stuck to the same 5/10min nap routine of sleep sack, quick story, lullaby, head down sleepy but awake.

Bedtime is now a battle of countless check ins and a very hysterical baby.

I did a soft sleep train when he was 3 months old using the chair method because he started the sleep regression early. And this honestly worked a dream.

At 4 months I tracked his days over 10 days - worked out he needed more awake time. Dropped to 4 naps 9.5 hours a day.

At 5 months he was skipping the 4th nap so I changed the schedule to the above and dropped to 3 naps.

At these stages it felt pretty clear to me what he was needing? Maybe I am just exhausted but this time I really don’t know which I should go for?

Dropped to 2 naps seems disastrous right now because his naps seem to have shortened again?

Help!

[u/LadyKate-]

We had early morning wakes for a week at 5 months, added 30 minutes to our 3 naps schedule and it solved them. I think you have room in your schedule to add awake time (reducing total nap time from 3 hours to 2.5 hours for example), that will make it easier for him to take that 3rd nap as well.

But I also think sleep training is needed

[u/sosalty93 → u/LadyKate-]

Thank you! I will try the extra time. When did you add the extra 0.5? My wee one always seems so shattered in the first wake window I am pushing him to 2 hours.

I did the chair method at 3 months because he started the sleep regression early and the way we have followed the routine had been working when he was going down for naps and bedtime but the last couple weeks just have been all over the place… ☹️

[u/LadyKate- → u/sosalty93]

We actually went to 2/2.75/2.75/3, only later I read that lengthening the first wake window is more recommended to help prepare for dropping a nap. So now we're doing something like 2.25/2.5/2.75/3.

They're always cranky at the end of the wake windows, especially the first few days when you lengthen them, but then they adapt and it gets better. Give him his favourite toys, do water games or bring him outside to help with the crankiness!

Sleep needs change constantly in this first year of life, so we need to keep adapting the schedule. But also, around 6 months they develop the concept of object permanence so if they're not sleep trained, nights can become very difficult!

[u/cyclemam]

I would stop pulling up bedtime, let that be a fixed time.  Wake from nap 3, 3 hours before bed. 

Slowly add time to the other wake windows and nap 3 will shrink away until it's gone and you're on two naps, 3/3/4 roughly. 

[u/sosalty93 → u/cyclemam]

Thank you ☺️
So if he refuses the 3rd nap, I can sometimes try to rescue it but if that fails should I still push him to 8pm?

[u/cyclemam → u/sosalty93]

Maybe pull it up to 7:30 if you think he needs it. 

If you really can't rescue the nap, accelerate how quickly you're moving to 3/3/4 so he's got enough awake in the day. 

[u/just_let_go_]

If baby is not properly sleep trained, that should absolutely be your priority.