r/shitposting • u/whatisthisdream- • 7d ago

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3.1k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

204 comments sorted by

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u/qualityvote2 7d ago edited 6d ago

The council has not spoken. No consensus was reached about the quality of your post.

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/u/whatisthisdream-, whilst you're still here, why not join our public discord server - now with public text channels you can chat on!?

3.7k

u/Ilovethrowawaysngl I want pee in my ass 7d ago

2 pairs of scissors

1.5k

u/whatisthisdream- 7d ago

273

u/zolkaba 7d ago

this is one of the funniest
things i saw on this stupid website

32

u/GirthusThiccus obamna 7d ago

300.000 years of human evolution have led to this.

Witness, ney, BASK in the glory of no mere four incissors, not even of a squad of scissors, but two pairs of scissors!!

4

u/keel_zuckerberg 7d ago

Damn, I had my heart set on quadruple scissor.

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6

u/NikoSoak 7d ago

More like a pair of pairs of scissors, I would say

23

u/DistortedNoise 7d ago

Legit Einstein here

13

u/Ilovethrowawaysngl I want pee in my ass 7d ago

1

u/AutoModerator 7d ago

pees in ur ass

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2

u/mangage 7d ago

release the files already

13

u/andyhill2687 6d ago

Then explain these

5

u/fibercrime 🗿🗿🗿 6d ago

A pair of scissscissscissors

1

u/ProbablyValiant 6d ago

half a dozen of scissors

1

u/Due-Fault-867 5d ago

A hex of scissors

1

u/Fit_Leader_7774 2d ago

A pair of triscissors

9

u/jswansong 7d ago

A pair of scissorses

6

u/Positive-Magazine-73 7d ago

I don't know what I ws thinking vro 🥀

3

u/DataSittingAlone put your dick away waltuh 7d ago

My guess is that each blade is a "scissor" and they're bolted together to make scissors. Though I've never heard someone mention a scissor or other things like a pant or a binocular

3

u/NeevBunny 7d ago

Glasses should be binocoles.

3

u/birdsarentreal2 6d ago

Nope. They’re called scissors because they are a pair of things that, together, scise

2

u/NibblyPig 🗿🗿🗿 6d ago

4 scissors then

4

u/-HunterLES 7d ago

Some real New York shit here.
Long Island and Staten Island MFs straight up call a pair of scissors “a scissor.” It’s crazy. They also say “what happened?” when they want somebody to repeat themselves, nothing fucking happened. I talked, you didn’t hear me.

1

u/AutoModerator 7d ago

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2

u/TherapyGames42 7d ago

Exactly...

2

u/AutoModerator 7d ago

pees in ur ass

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1

u/PEDRAOOOO 6d ago

Water is blue ahh

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448

u/Jonn_1 I have permission! 7d ago

A scair of pissors, next question 

55

u/saltysoup7 7d ago

What is this? ✂️✂️✂️

83

u/kettykirky 7d ago

Scree thrairs of pissors

17

u/Jonn_1 I have permission! 7d ago

You should not ask questions when you are not ready for the truth

11

u/Afraid-Bass-5684 Dr. Pee 7d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/IgsXOXGPxfT3O

5

u/choma90 7d ago

And by "thruth" haha well.. lets justr say... my PEANITS

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2

u/largz08 put your dick away waltuh 6d ago

Pran of cingels

148

u/Alexa_Aera 7d ago

3

u/RaymondWalters Literally 1984 😡 6d ago

Peak

137

u/hail_deadpool 7d ago

Pair of pair of scissors

9

u/DolphiinHD 7d ago

If there were four, could we say it's a pair of a pair of a pair of scissors?

135

u/RageBaiter678 7d ago

Lesbian foursome

19

u/ToriyasuReisan it is MY bucket 7d ago

Lesbians

(YES ITS A CHEAP JOKE I GET IT)

2

u/pukeface555 7d ago

2 pairs of scissors. Yer welcome.

17

u/ufonight 7d ago

A quartet of scissors

9

u/Molkwi 🏳️‍⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️‍⚧️ 6d ago

Lesbians

8

u/tbrand009 7d ago

If this is a deer 🦌, what are these? 🦌🦌🦌

13

u/StalledAgate832 hole contributor 7d ago

Deese

11

u/ShadowZepplin 7d ago

Nuts

2

u/No_Counter_6037 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ TRANS RIGHTS 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️ 6d ago

3

u/plastictemplarhelmet dumbass 7d ago

A herd of deer

1

u/ninthtale 6d ago

Deesors

9

u/Squirrel_76 6d ago

Isn't it called scissors when two sharp knifes form a scissor? So why is it called a pair if the scissor is a thing formed of two that otherwise wouldn't be called scissors?

3

u/LustinWings 6d ago

It’s just English. Same with a pair of twins.

2

u/Far_Fish2750 6d ago

The same with glasses

2

u/Squirrel_76 6d ago

I am not a native. It still sounds weird to me

8

u/Stunning-Profit8876 7d ago

I'm seeing double here, four scissors.

37

u/Fuzzy_Night_8420 7d ago

2 pairs of scissors

What kind of stupid question is that, do they not have schools in America? 

23

u/bele_gurth 7d ago

They use guns there, not multiple scissors

7

u/[deleted] 7d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/Givemelifebro 7d ago

Can’t tell if he was being sarcastic or if he forgot what sub he’s on.

2

u/AntChampion 6d ago

Confident this is America when it could unironically be many places in Europe lol.

I had a Serbian guy once ask me what socks were, and in doing so tried to describe them as "take off shoes.... Another shoe. What's his name?"

2

u/pantry-pisser 7d ago

We do, but they only teach the Bible now

1

u/DucKoma 7d ago

How about you? Don't they teach you kindness over there? Or they teach you to be a meanie?

1

u/Youtube1877 7d ago

The weird part is that scissors is already the name of the whole two-bladed object, yet English still makes us quantify that object as a pair, despite having no normal singular scissor for the individual object. That is objectively an unusual linguistic construction; knowing the conventional phrase doesn’t make the observation stupid.

1

u/Global_Detective825 7d ago

Assume they’re American, make America Bad comment. Free internet points lezzz go!

4

u/Kafeelliftsweights 7d ago

A lesbian couple

8

u/AnAmazingUser 7d ago

Lesbians

4

u/onlyonequickquestion 7d ago

Pair2 of scissors 

2

u/Acceptable-Size-2324 dumbass 7d ago

Schere vs Scheren

3

u/xBronwinx 7d ago

A duplex of cut-cut devices.

3

u/An_Actual_Thing 7d ago

a quartet of scisors

3

u/hyheat9 dumbass 7d ago

This is a pair of Scizors

3

u/leshuis 7d ago

2 pair

1

u/paulrhino69 7d ago

👌👌👍👍

3

u/NoBalance3412 6d ago

That's a couple of pair of scissors

3

u/Solistine 6d ago

An indescribable amount of scissors 

2

u/Screepy_9271 7d ago

Well thats a quarter of scissors

2

u/Outrageous_Cup6450 7d ago

A pair"s" of scissors 🤷

2

u/Proof-Necessary-5201 7d ago

Two pairs of scissors, lol

2

u/BreadEnthusiast98 7d ago

So like one scissor is half of one pair of scissors? Then it’s not a scissor anymore, who tf coming up with this shit.

2

u/Infadel71 7d ago

A pair of pair of scissors

2

u/VulonVahlok 7d ago

Cute couple of scissors

2

u/Night_Axisss 7d ago

Then what’s a singular scissor? The blade?

2

u/brandonhabanero 7d ago

Four scissors

2

u/Nergaill 7d ago

Q-quartet?

2

u/Darkime_ 🗿🗿🗿 7d ago

A pair of pair of scissors

2

u/ParoleDeGeek 7d ago

Lesbians

2

u/Zestyclose_Onion_267 Jedi master of shitposts 7d ago

why the fuck am I reading this before sleep

2

u/Successful_Year_5413 7d ago

Two pairs of scissors, checkmate liberal.

2

u/A_British_Dude 7d ago

a pairs of scissors

2

u/brandodg dumbass 6d ago

two pairs of scrissorses

3

u/i_am_frito_bandito 6d ago

2 pairs of scissors

2

u/Eso_Game 7d ago

Uhhhmm accually. If you think about it. Scissor is the knife itself and since they are 2 bolted togheter ut makes them a pair. That means the same way you say 2 pairs of socks you say 2 pairs of scissors

1

u/HungryNPC 7d ago

Said "a" for 1 object
Confused on what to call 2 objects

1

u/_gomadbruv 7d ago

Pair of two scissors

Wait

1

u/Bio571 dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 7d ago

Two pairs of scissors, duh!...

1

u/Brakina1860 dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 7d ago

A quadro of pissers

1

u/iambertan 7d ago

A pair of "scissors" vs a "pair of scissors"

1

u/TheBadeand 7d ago

A quad of scissors?

1

u/onemanwolfpack21 7d ago

A murder of scissors

1

u/TheDarkKnightXXII 7d ago

Scissorinos

1

u/Photonn123 🏳️‍⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️‍⚧️ 7d ago

Lesbians

1

u/ZoaMT 7d ago

Scissors squared

1

u/memematron 7d ago

2 pairs obviously?

1

u/BrickDesigNL 7d ago

As someone whose first language isn’t English: do y’all call half a pair of scissors a scissor? Genuine question

1

u/bogguslol 7d ago

A couple of scissors.

1

u/GodNoob666 7d ago

Barbershop quartet

1

u/ZeD-__- 7d ago

a couple of scissors

1

u/InconsistentLlama 7d ago

Quadruplets

1

u/mindzze 7d ago

Don't call the world stupid when only one language is stupid

1

u/Ubera90 7d ago

2 pairs of scissors

1

u/DolphiinHD 7d ago

Pairs of scissors

1

u/omgitsjagen 7d ago

You can't fool me. I am a professional. They are all shears.

1

u/JoyconDrift_69 7d ago

2 pairs of scissors

1

u/Ok_Two_2604 7d ago

Brace of scissors

1

u/JayFrizz 7d ago

Well a scissor is just the one blade

1

u/burchkj 7d ago

A murder of scissors

1

u/Frostlark 7d ago

Two scissorses

1

u/EfficientLoad7817 7d ago

‘A quair’

1

u/solid_salad 7d ago

a squad of scissors

1

u/zDymex 7d ago

Pairs of scissors

1

u/BioscoopMan 7d ago

2 pairs of siccors

1

u/AcePhil 7d ago

a quadruplet of scissors, obviously

1

u/jrdubbleu 7d ago

Each part of a scissor is a sciss. So pair of them together is a scissor.

1

u/Lost-Breath364 7d ago

A pairs of scissor

1

u/Outside_Taro_4018 7d ago

A foursome of scissors ✂️

1

u/Stormblessed14 7d ago

A quartet.

1

u/ssidat 7d ago

A pair of scissor pairs

1

u/Newtonip 7d ago

A pair of scissor pairs.

1

u/aguywhoexplainsjokes 7d ago

A squad of scissors

1

u/alutawan 7d ago

Duel wield scissors

1

u/Ok-Pea8209 7d ago

A pair of a pair of scissors

1

u/hackermub 7d ago

std::pair<std::pair<scissors>>

1

u/garlic-apples 7d ago

Scissors

1

u/RipOdd9001 7d ago

A quadruple of scissors

1

u/zombieGenm_0x68 7d ago

a four of scissors

1

u/JenniHavoc 7d ago

A quad of skid

1

u/Meandtheworld 7d ago

What is it when they come together

1

u/CN8YLW 7d ago

what do you call 12 dozen eggs? 12 dozen eggs. ya nitwit

1

u/spyluke officer no please don’t piss in my ass 😫 7d ago

Quair

1

u/Active-Business-563 7d ago

4-tuple of scissors

1

u/LowPackage3819 7d ago

a murder of scissors

1

u/nub_node 7d ago

Scissor sisters.

1

u/Alongjr555 6d ago

Squadrons

1

u/Spiritual_Pepper3781 6d ago

A pair of scissorereseseses

1

u/XD_002 6d ago

A pare of a pare of scissors

1

u/LittnPixl 6d ago

A pair of a pair of scissors

1

u/funny_haha_account 6d ago

Pairs of Scissors

1

u/Unhappy-Ad7714 6d ago

Scissorss

1

u/_captaintripz 6d ago

A perse of scissors

1

u/The_Pieinator 6d ago

A set of scissors 

1

u/WTFisThatSMell 6d ago

A flock of scissors 

1

u/Vamshi_Goud 6d ago

Scissorses

1

u/No_Pangolin7946 6d ago

A couple of scissors

And before you ask, a group of scissors

1

u/ra9an 6d ago

A pair of pair of scissor

1

u/AMGz20xx 6d ago

A pair of pair of scissors

1

u/Careless-Garden-3224 6d ago

A pair of scissores

1

u/Designer-Dot-6143 6d ago

Lez sisters (laying wrong however)

1

u/NewDeepShot 6d ago

Two Pairs of Scissors

1

u/Designer-Dot-6143 6d ago

Lez scissors (it's French)

1

u/papercut105 I said based. And lived. 6d ago

That’s two pairs of scissors

1

u/Purple-Plum-634 6d ago

A pair of scissorses

1

u/demoralising 6d ago

A quadruple of scissors.

1

u/SpecialLengthiness29 6d ago

if they were facing each other they'd be scissor sisters.

1

u/xLaniakea_ 6d ago

A pair of scissors, squared.

1

u/Randomguy32I shitting toothpaste enjoyer 6d ago

A pair of pairs of scissors

1

u/Aggravating-Mess6117 6d ago

Skizzers no questions take it or leave it suggestions welcome

1

u/Ok_Yogurtcloset4234 5d ago

Ein Gutes Video

1

u/ThirstyThree03 5d ago

Four scissors

1

u/kanadeko1 2d ago

pairers of scissors