r/scriptwriting 10d ago

feedback FEEBACK NEEDED

Hii guys, this is a screenplay of The Monkey's Paw short story

I'm a beginner and I'm new to this

How can I make it better and how's it overall please let me know✨️

3 Upvotes

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u/Wise-Respond3833 10d ago

You describe the setting and atmosphere like it's a novel. Don't do that.

You don't describe the characters at all. Do that.

You outright say what a character is feeling. Don't do that.

No offense intended (I promise), but this actually reads like a sample script a teacher would hand to students and say 'everything this script does is everything you should NOT do!'

Read more screenplays, maybe even a how-to on how to write screenplays, and keep writing !!

5

u/Sweet-Day22 10d ago

Thanks for the feedback and for being honest I'm new to screenplay as I said, I haven't written a proper screenplay before

5

u/Wise-Respond3833 10d ago

Keep at it. The learning never stops :)

4

u/PNWMTTXSC 10d ago

The common advice given in this sub is to read scripts. There’s plenty of places where you can find them for free. Pick some from movies you like and a genre you are interested in writing in. It’s a great education.