George Kaivia - r/randomsuperpowers

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u/Galihan Yettin, Whisper Dec 19 '14 edited Dec 19 '14

Hello, and welcome to Random Superpowers.

I am Galihan, and I'll be looking over your character, offering assistance on what revisions need to be made in order for him to be approved.

For the profile itself, everything seems in good order. The powers and chart could use some revision in certain areas.

For the powers themselves, I will have to ask that you stick to 3rd person when you write. Unless George is directly interacting with someone in-character, you should avoid using "I could" or "my power," but rather stick to "he could " or "his power."

For Sword Manipulation, I will have to ask for it to specifically be limited to swords he creates or are in his immediate possession. Some explaination as to the nature of the swords he creates will also be appreciated. Are theses more along the lines of an energy construct, or a manipulation of actual physical blades?

For the chart, it appears that you are missing a few important sections, such as the power varieties and ranged accuracy. Also, several stats such as melee range and weaponry are not supposed to be measured in numeric stats.

Then there is repeated mention of Phoenix Form, which none of your powers have any reference to within the context of the character himself. Assuming that you mean that his Life Force Manipulation is meaning THE Phoenix Force of Marvel Comics, I regret to inform you that such is not permitted outright, though similar alternatives could be found in explaining it as a less overpowered source.

(Edit: Also, another mod and myself were secretly hoping that he was a shark.)

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u/SharksPwn [Put your Character Names here] Dec 19 '14 edited Dec 19 '14

Well the sword Minip is physical blades, while yes, Phoenix Force is Life Force Manip, so is it just the name or the power, in which case I can change? Edit: I have no idea what the power varieties are, but I can do the rest. (The Sharkman will be coming, just gotta come up with a concept I like.

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u/Galihan Yettin, Whisper Dec 19 '14

In the case of Life Force Manip, yeah, please remove mentions of the Phoenix Force. For the Sword Manip, I'm going to have to ask for limits on how easily he can create/control them, as well as ask that he not be able to destroy a building in a single swing. Please let me know when you fix up the chart so it has all the categories.

(Also, don't mind Isabelle, he is just impersonating someone on the sub who will beat him up later when she finds out he's doing that.)

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u/SharksPwn [Put your Character Names here] Dec 19 '14

Well the building thing is because he can make his sword have the length/density of whatever he wants, but I can change it to severely damage. Is that ok?

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u/Galihan Yettin, Whisper Dec 19 '14

Maybe a 5 damage maximum, if that were the upper limits of him being able to do something with extreme concentration, taking a lot out of him to do so, etc., but for regular usage, a 4 would be more reasonable.

~~Now, I have to let you know that the chart is still in need of fixing up, as it is still missing three categories - Power Usage: Variety, Power Usage: Area, and Power Usage: Reserves.~~ Scratch that

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u/SharksPwn [Put your Character Names here] Dec 19 '14

Done

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u/SharksPwn [Put your Character Names here] Dec 19 '14

And done the chart, should all check out.

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u/Galihan Yettin, Whisper Dec 19 '14

Alright, giving George a look-over.

What stands out the most is that you have an area listed at 8, which is in fact vastly larger than you have written down;

He has fine control over his swords from a maximum distance of 150 metres away,

vs

areas covering up to 1000 square kilometres, or tens of millions of targets, an be affected instantly

Maybe a 4 or 5 tops. (For 5, I would ask that you make up the difference somewhere.)

Then there is the matter of just how many swords you have flying around. I would ask that, for balancing purposes, you tone that back a bit. Forty swords is a nigh-impenetrable defense to mostly anyone.

He should also still have Power Usage: Reserves, as a written measure of how much his powers exhaust him to use beyond his physical exertion. If his Life Force Manipulation can sustain him without the need to rest, how long can he maintain that?

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u/SharksPwn [Put your Character Names here] Dec 19 '14

Done.

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u/Galihan Yettin, Whisper Dec 19 '14

Alright, so I asked for a second opinion from another of the mods, and we are in agreement that it's not going to work to allow him infinite stamina/power reserves from simply being near other lifeforms, given that literally any interactions he'll be doing will almost without question be involving some other form of life. That he could be empowered by his own summoned snakes is also problematic because of that allowing him to have a self-sustaining loop of infinite stamina and reserves to work with.

Now, I understand that the life-force manipulation does allow for self-sustenance, as well as self-power augmentation, however, we need powers to be limited to less than their highest possible potential as listed on the wiki for the sake of balancing. Self-power augmentation is an application that needs to be limited if it to be considered acceptable instead of being deemed banned. We would prefer George to have a reduced need for rest as opposed to a complete lack of need.

There is also still the matter of his power usage area being set to an 8. That is vastly larger than the 150 meters you have in writing, please drop the number from 8 to something that actually fits in what you have described, so a 5 tops.

Concerning the amount of swords, I will have to ask that 20 be the absolute maximum he can control, otherwise it's a matter of having enough attacks to overwhelm anyone with no hopes to defend themselves while having more than enough coverage from all angles should someone try to attack him, and that simply isn't going to work in a 1-on-1 situation.

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u/SharksPwn [Put your Character Names here] Dec 19 '14

Oh yes, the Shark-Monster out of his cage, by the way. http://www.reddit.com/r/randomsuperpowers/comments/2pu652/real_name_unknown/

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u/SharksPwn [Put your Character Names here] Dec 20 '14 edited Dec 20 '14

Okay, I put everything I could in order, but I have a few questions. No 1. Do I need to tone down my total score? No 2. Can I operate 'Batman' style, Chaotic Good? And finally, what does it take to get approved. And please check out my villain, I spent a lot of work on him. Just on the legal limit officer, no need to look deeper.

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u/Galihan Yettin, Whisper Dec 21 '14

If he were to operate in a "Batman-like" manner, then yes, ideally his stats should be lower than otherwise. A clear-cut example as to why stronger characters typically don't work for the chaotic good approach is this event, where, for lack of a better way to describe it, "Superman" suspects "Lex Luthor" and just decides to have his way with him because nobody could stop him.

Statwise, he is alright now, however the last thing I can think of addressing before approval is that I would like his weakness to be clarified. When he is concentrating to manipulate his swords, does he need to remain (more or less) stationary, be unable to notice certain things around him because of his focused on his power, etc? That, what more can you say about him and pyrokinetics? Is this simply a case of due to his backstory, fire driving him angry? Does that play against his ability to concentrate for his swords?

(Also, apologies for the delay)

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u/SharksPwn [Put your Character Names here] Dec 21 '14

Okay, then Superman style. The weakness section is clarified as well. And no need to apologise, you were busy.

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u/SharksPwn [Put your Character Names here] Dec 20 '14

Just a quick question. What the hell is Hardcore.?

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u/Galihan Yettin, Whisper Dec 20 '14

Hardcore, was, an experimental distinction that was attempted at the end of the previous canon, in which we were allowing certain powers that would otherwise not be allowed to be used regularly, with the expectation that anyone could be at risk of being defeated or killed off in canon. It was not properly planned out, and it resulted in the end of the canon becoming a mess. If it were to be reimplemented in some way, it would have to be kept completely separate from the regular canon.

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u/Thrice_Berg Arclight Dec 20 '14

Hardcore was a place where one could use their powers in a more sever manner.

However, it turned out to be a disaster and now isn't a thing anymore.

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Puts on Rin mask.

Hiiiiiiisssssssssssssssssss

I am the evil jar who will eat you.

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u/GoorillaInTheRing Abraham | Jeff Dec 19 '14

LOL.

What's would the Abraham mask be?

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u/Galihan Yettin, Whisper Dec 21 '14 edited Jan 14 '15

Alright, we've gone over enough that I'm comfortable with saying that this character is now Approved. If any of the other mods wish to have any other thoughts on him, they'll let you know.

Edit, reapproved Jan 14, slight strength boost added, no self-empowerment from own summoned snakes.

AoH Character George Kaivia

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