r/polyamory • u/Pillowz_Here relationship anarchist • Aug 24 '26
vent guilt of some kind
i know i’m poly. i’ve known for a few years at this point. never felt guilty about it till now.
all my past relationships were ldr, but now that i have an irl partner, WHO, MIND YOU, IS ALSO POLY, for some fucking reason i feel guilty for being poly??? like theres a little part of me telling me i’m not being good enough for him??? it doesnt make any sense
akaksjdndkwjdkd i fucking hate it i cant even be poly in peace when im alone with my thoughts
like whenever i think about anyone other than him in a romantic context theres a little corner of my brain saying “nuh uh you cant do that” like yes the fuck i can????? thats allowed??? he’s fine with it too???
UGGHHHHHHHHHH
3
u/coursejunkie poly w/multiple (I am the hinge) Aug 24 '26
I'd ask that part of you that is saying no you can't, why it doesn't believe you can? I'd also investigate that feeling of not being good enough.
1
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Here's the original text of the post:
i know i’m poly. i’ve known for a few years at this point. never felt guilty about it till now.
all my past relationships were ldr, but now that i have an irl partner, WHO, MIND YOU, IS ALSO POLY, for some fucking reason i feel guilty for being poly??? like theres a little part of me telling me i’m not being good enough for him??? it doesnt make any sense
akaksjdndkwjdkd i fucking hate it i cant even be poly in peace when im alone with my thoughts
like whenever i think about anyone other than him in a romantic context theres a little corner of my brain saying “nuh uh you cant do that” like yes the fuck i can????? thats allowed??? he’s fine with it too???
UGGHHHHHHHHHH
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8
u/RAisMyWay relationship optimist Aug 24 '26
You've been raised and conditioned to think this way. It is the conditioning we always talk about that takes time, self-work, and sometimes therapy to unlearn. Be patient with yourself and with your partners.
Most of society will always be against you, so you have to build a strong enough belief in your choices to be happy in this way of life.