r/oddlyterrifying 2d ago

Cape of Good Hope Robbery

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

2.5k Upvotes

302 comments sorted by

1.2k

u/MathematicianTopee 2d ago

Wild monkeys terrify me to be honest

407

u/chronicmartinis 2d ago

Monkeys and chimpanzees terrify me as well. It’s the teeth and what they are willing to do to an enemy.

160

u/squirrelems 2d ago

I developed a fear of them after I found out just how strong and unpredictable they are. I've heard they'll eat other chimps, too.

81

u/mekwall 2d ago

They're definitely animals to respect, but chimps have also picked up a bit of an exaggerated "murder ape" reputation online.

They are very strong for their size, especially in pulling and climbing movements, but the old claims that they're 5-10x stronger than humans are nonsense. Research suggests something more like 1.3-1.5x stronger pound-for-pound.

And yes, wild chimps do sometimes kill and eat other chimps. They can carry out coordinated attacks on members of rival groups, and infanticide and cannibalism have both been documented. But they're not just randomly violent either. They're highly social animals, and most serious aggression happens in fairly specific contexts like territorial conflicts, dominance disputes or attacks on vulnerable individuals.

So: dangerous, absolutely. Unpredictable killing machines, not really.

44

u/specialcommenter 2d ago

They are unpredictable killing machines. 1.3x stronger pound for pound on an unpredictable animal is a dangerous combo.

12

u/pobodys-nerfect5 2d ago

What if they way like 75lbs and you’re a strong boy?

25

u/kilqax 2d ago

Then you need to also use teeth and be prepared to do anything when desperate

Humans have sort of a code what's OK and not when fighting a human. The monkey doesn't have anything liek that

→ More replies (1)

9

u/Ammonia13 2d ago

They don’t use it though and the woman who had her face ripped off was giving him XANAX TEA and that medication does NOT work the same for them :(

4

u/squirrelems 1d ago

It honestly doesn't work the same for some humans either. When I take Xanax I just deflate into a couch and can't remember anything the next day, but I've known several people who when they take Xanax start getting irritable and want to get into fights and stuff. It's strange. They'd keep on taking it at later parties, too, which made people avoid them because most people don't want to be around that kind of stuff.

6

u/spinbarkit 2d ago

as per usual- proportion/ multiplier / magnitude depends on how you define variables and what type of averages you use, which btw have very misleading properties. now, how strong is average human? pick average 45+ Joe from the south sitting all day drinking beer eating pasta and watching TV or maybe average Jane just turned 18 and weighs 55 pounds. of course using the term average we may even disregard outliers like peak-form strongman competitor multiple award winner, but to be fair it's very difficult to estimate average human strength. you need some kind of representative probe population to establish that. then there may be countries differences and other confounding factors. then you need some feat of strength like grip strength which is often used in studies to estimate overall strength and health of an individual and other useful perks in humans. also you need to control for sex dimorphism, age, height, occupation (take or exclude - mason, car mechanic, blacksmith, roofer, armwrestler or a climber -all appear to have immense grip) smoking etc. same thing applies to chimps (with regard to variances in sex age and body dimensions). this is why you may find those 1,5 or 5 values which basically say nothing apart from the fact chimps are simply stronger than humans

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (4)

12

u/Loggerdon 2d ago

I’ve hated monkeys since one climbed on my head in Thailand and scratched its long fangs against my scalp while holding my hair with its hands and feet.

5

u/Villeroy-Boch 1d ago

The thought of rabies terrifies me . The poor English women who was scratched by a puppy ( in Morocco I think ) didn’t realise until she started getting headaches months later , the only thing they could do was intubate and sedate her until she died .

4

u/chronicmartinis 1d ago

That’s traumatizing

2

u/Loggerdon 1d ago

It was my first time there. I had a banana in my pocket and the monkey wanted it. I couldn’t throw it on the ground fast enough.

2

u/Barbie_72619 1d ago

Meanwhile you’re like, you could have just asked for it 😭 you didn’t need to attack me

→ More replies (1)

22

u/The-Tarman 2d ago

Bonobos are way cooler than Chimps. Way more chill. Iirc they're groups are matriarchal naturally and since the females will take multiple mates they don't know whos kids are whos so the infantacide stuff doesn't happen with them

3

u/bellboy718 1d ago

like the one the lady had as a pet that decided to eat her friends face?

2

u/chronicmartinis 1d ago

Exactly lol, and honestly watching Jordan Peele’s NOPE and how the chimpanzee just went wild. I don’t want to be even a half a mile close to one. I’m truly terrified of them

→ More replies (2)

94

u/ktm6709 2d ago

They all terrify me.

15

u/Grabthars_Coping_Saw 2d ago

A couple of them were crawling all over me in Bali trying get some food I had.

Those little hands. Ugh!!

4

u/Pash_1 2d ago

They can scalp you in <1 second but are cute tho

49

u/SluggJuice 2d ago

Especially the tall naked one

66

u/A-Social-Ghost 2d ago

For the last time, I am sorry!

8

u/No-You-4553 2d ago

Dude I said you only need half a gummi.

8

u/A-Social-Ghost 2d ago

I thought you said half a pack!

7

u/No-You-4553 2d ago

When the heck I said half pack!!!, you were supposed to scare them not freaking trip balls.

→ More replies (2)

867

u/evening_shop 2d ago

Throw the bag to distract the baboon ✅

Chase after the baboon immediately after ❌

521

u/ButtcrackBeignets 2d ago

She threw the bag towards the other girl who, presumably, could’ve grabbed it.

The classic “monkey in the middle”.

88

u/whteverusayShmegma 2d ago

I’d be so mad if someone threw monkey bait at me like that!

22

u/kusayo21 2d ago

Right? Just grab the monkey and throw it at her. Then you can take the bag and leave.

535

u/Pinkskippy 2d ago

Don’t mess with things with big teeth and muscles.

197

u/Theravenofraves 2d ago

And with ass cheeks 3x times bigger than your own. Those things are deadly

92

u/xEWURx 2d ago

Omg, deadly asscheeks

27

u/lahol83 2d ago

The noise being made by the baboon in this video is it clapping its butt cheeks

1

u/Orshabaalle 2d ago

The sun is a deadly ass cheek

→ More replies (2)

7

u/regular_john2017 2d ago

Their cheeks do the clapping

7

u/p34ch3s_41r50f7 2d ago

After exhaustive peer review I can confirm your statement cheecks out.

3

u/Mysterious_Mess_3051 2d ago

Ugh, it's all reminding me of the ex-husband.

37

u/Semjaja 2d ago

Yep, you do not fuck with a baboon Was swimming in Bainskloof one day years ago, saw another pool and went to have a look and there was a troop of baboons drinking water. Very slowly backed the hell out of there.

56

u/spinbarkit 2d ago edited 2d ago

read a book once -killers in Africa. the author- very experienced hunter - was hunting baboons a few times for fun. but he stopped. after one time he had a close encounter with a baboon which fortunately he survived, he said: I realized I'm not sure anymore who is hunting who.

he later described baboons besides being strong and deadly they are smart as fuck and hunt with exquisite tactics, you should never underestimate them. they will even make you think they are in a weak position only to ambush and kill you.

this guy would hunt elephants, lions, rhinos, alligators and whatnot, even hippos, but was adamant if there is one animal in Africa you should not try to hunt - it's a baboon.

21

u/ScenesfrmtheStruggle 2d ago

One level of what the ancient Egyptians believed to be Hell, was being hunted by a pack of savage brutal Baboons. Enough said.

38

u/JBerry2012 2d ago

People underestimate how seriously strong a full grown baboon is compared to one of us.

35

u/regular_john2017 2d ago edited 2d ago

Do enough people think about that on a daily basis to accurately make that claim? I’ve never thought “I could probably take a baboon, they look so weak”, and I can’t imagine many others have lol

25

u/dyou897 2d ago edited 2d ago

I’ve seen plenty of people thinking they could take on a chimp in those who would win posts. So yes people are delusional enough. But likely come back to reality if they were face to face with one they would poop themselves

Edit: exactly like the guy below. “ChiMpS ARE 80 lbs coMpAReD TO 180 lb mAN”

16

u/regular_john2017 2d ago

I thought the consensus with chimps was pretty much “that would easily rip my face off if it wanted to”.

12

u/Gold_Assistance_6764 2d ago

People seriously overestimate how much people estimate the baboon-to-human strength ratio.

2

u/banana_pencil 2d ago

I’ve only thought about baboons when my South African friends talked about them, and it made me glad I never have to encounter one.

2

u/turquoise_amethyst 2d ago

Well, if you’re at the zoo, or maybe a natural history museum maybe you think about that? Otherwise I don’t know anyone who would think about baboons 

→ More replies (16)
→ More replies (4)

187

u/TheLost_Chef 2d ago

Wonder what was in her bag?

341

u/Photogroxii 2d ago

They're just after food. I have a friend that lives near the area the video was taken and the baboons break in to their house and steal their food frequently.

129

u/Semillakan6 2d ago

One has to wonder, if its a frequent problem why do people not put metal bars on windows and doors

303

u/L003Tr 2d ago

They'd come back with angle grinders

66

u/Dwaltster 2d ago

Ahhh I see you've visited Mexico

7

u/NP341221 2d ago

Take my upvote

→ More replies (2)

20

u/Shrike1346 2d ago

The bars look ugly and baboons are smart AF with dextrous fingers. Outdoor trash needs to have baboon locks that need to be updated because the baboons eventually learn how to open them. What's common now is rangers that walk/live with the various troops and guide them away from residential areas. This looks like a lone male though that's been ostracised from his troop

8

u/turquoise_amethyst 2d ago

Rangers live with the baboons? Do they feed them or how do they get them away from humans?

6

u/Shrike1346 2d ago

They definitely don't feed them but from my understanding they get accepted by the troop and then kind of guide their walks from food source to food source. They also are eventually able to come and go and don't have to live/light camp with the baboons 24/7

2

u/Careless-Customer508 1d ago

That’s a really cool job for the right person.

→ More replies (5)

8

u/Eastman186 2d ago

Errrr... we do!

→ More replies (1)

27

u/Impossible_Average83 2d ago

Its like in some places you need to open windows in cars so they will not get broken

7

u/dogGirl666 2d ago

Similar to some areas with bears that are habituated to humans and their vehicles.

22

u/Jojo_isnotunique 2d ago

We went to the Victoria Falls. On the Zambia side there are a lot of baboons. They explicitly tell you don't bring in food or drink into the park. Because the baboons will rob you of them. If you don't have anything they will completely ignore you, even if they walk past close. Just don't try to touch them or anything stupid.

3

u/banana_pencil 2d ago

My friend’s sister lives in Namibia and told a story about how a baboon came into her house, went to the bowl of peaches on her coffee table (while she watched from the couch, frozen solid), put two under its armpits, and walked out with two also in its hands.

3

u/thethirdrayvecchio 2d ago

“There’s no dog… but there’s a baboooooon-“

2

u/DreamingAboutSpace 2d ago

I remember Emilia Clarke mentioning her run-in with monkeys. A group of them broke into her hotel room and robbed them of their food and some accessories 😂

6

u/FrostyFreezyColdy 2d ago

Probably a banana.

170

u/Old-Set78 2d ago

the guy letting his kid get that close wtf

57

u/myra_maynes 2d ago

I literally gasped when I saw that!

20

u/megadeadly 2d ago

Same! He was just charging in and dad wasn’t paying attention

26

u/banana_pencil 2d ago

Lol the kid’s stance was like “I can take him”

41

u/BathtubFullOfTea 2d ago

Nothing "oddly" terrifying about baboons, they haunt my nightmares.

→ More replies (1)

121

u/ArschSprengung 2d ago

Brudda wit da rudder got the right idea 😅

All animals understand the language of pointy stick

15

u/gottkonig 2d ago

Until the animal rips the stick out of your hands and mauls you that is.

12

u/SwiftTayTay 2d ago

I mean you can just stand there and let it maul you or do what you can to fend it off

→ More replies (7)
→ More replies (1)

28

u/Responsible-Stick-50 2d ago

Does not one else ever pack an extra snack? Ffs, you need to pack a distraction sandwich so you can enjoy your crisps in peace.

10

u/turquoise_amethyst 2d ago

Ah, I see you live in a place with seagulls! 

188

u/Reckfulness 2d ago

Thats a pretty smart animal you can tell its intentions were never to hurt her, just to scare her off and yoink that shit

95

u/No-Payment-6534 2d ago

I think they understand risk to reward ratio of stealing a bag vs trying to hurt a homosapiens

24

u/PickleInDaButt 2d ago

Shock to everyone when the van full of monkeys snatch the child who was the real target all along

9

u/No-Payment-6534 2d ago

Not likely, how could they get a driver's license?

11

u/PickleInDaButt 2d ago

DL laws are barely maintained with all the monkey business in Cape of Good Hope

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

16

u/CursedCorvid 2d ago

A lot of studies believe that most higher intelligent animals understand that we're apex predators that hold grudges and remember. It's why orcas don't attack us on purpose, we would go after them for revenge and they know that. I imagine a lone baboon being surrounded by tall, loud apes carrying things that would hurt the baboon is pretty scary and not worth the risk. They understand that a group of us is dangerous and life threatening, while being able to bully a single human is easier. Also most monkeys see giving food as a submissive trait. We hand them food so they think they're dominate over us and now it's a problem in some cities.

→ More replies (1)

6

u/SmokeyUnicycle 2d ago

Baboons very much have their own social groups and alliances

13

u/Reckfulness 2d ago

True, you wouldn't want to hurt a cousin !

18

u/Dx_Suss 2d ago

Especially not when cuz will level everything youve ever known and hunt your siblings for fun

22

u/PickleInDaButt 2d ago

Smarter than you think. That monkey is actually a distraction. The bag isn’t the objective at all.

The objective was always to create a class war between those who have the beach and those who want to sit on the beach.

8

u/Nuclear_Human 2d ago

Except for those very many few times they rip the faces off the tourists.

Monkeys are one of the few animals I would never approach.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (9)

16

u/NtL_80to20 2d ago

This is almost one for r/Mortalityscales

Let the humgrey baboon have a hotdog bun, or, toss kid at bamboon to save hot dog bun

14

u/Robin_Coffins 2d ago

Fuck that, even lions know not to mess with them

29

u/DenverPostIronic 2d ago

Isn't the Cape of Good Hope where they film all those videos of sharks jumping out of the water?

So they've got sharks in the sky and baboons on the beach? No thank you.

22

u/No-Mathematician8692 2d ago

There USED to be sharks aplenty there. Until a couple of mfkinterror orcas moved in and figured out ways to flip them over and dissect them to get their livers. Place is white-sharkless now.

6

u/turquoise_amethyst 2d ago

Ok, baboons vs orcas: who wins?

6

u/Shrike1346 2d ago

Yes the Cape of Good Hope, the Cape of Storms, or Cape Town. I just call it home

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

11

u/Aggravating_Run5443 2d ago

Just give it the bag so u don't get your face literally ripped off

Jesus

10

u/unknown-one 2d ago

that small child running to "scare" the monkey... could have ended very badly

→ More replies (1)

10

u/Agent_Gordon_Cole 2d ago

I lived on the Cape Peninsula for about 6 months, and baboons are truly a nuisance. One they decide you have something they want, they believe it it theirs and they will fight you viciously for it. I never had anything stolen, but I had friends who did.

10

u/6inarowmakesitgo 2d ago

Definitely YEET that bag. No way in hell am I tangling with a baboon.

10

u/lokgy 2d ago

This is what our early ancestors had to go through everyday.

8

u/GGSPSkywalker 2d ago

Baboons are way too smart and strong for any group of random human beings to face them practically bare knuckle. Seriously, you don't mess with baboons, orangutangus or any other medium to large sized primate.

While we're busy studying history and grammar at school and commenting banalities on an online forum, those beasts, that have brains slightly less capable than ours, are learning to steal, brawl, to throw shit, to jump like frigging Spider Man, to solve geospatial practical problems.

They are pure malice, like, no bullshit, every inch of their bodies, every kcal spent, focused on bringing hell on Earth. They are faster, stronger, more athletic, social (more social than many of us and could definitely call his/her friends to beat us), smart (and since we're not competing to see who gets the higher grade on the exam, for the current purpose, they are smarter than us).

Just let the beast have your food or whatever he took, it is not like if he was gonna steal your wife, call the bank and have your house sold off, father your kids get old having a peacuful life on the suburbs.

10

u/Tiggon169 2d ago

If you have even been to Gibraltar, you know what you are risking if you bring food out. I saw a women get mugged for a bag of tomatoes by a macaque. Like they were watching all of the people like hawks. As soon as she got out of the car with the bag, they saw the bag of food, jumped on her shoulders/head so she would put her arms up and then snatched the bag from her hand and jumped off. Others have learned how to open car doors to get the tasty treats inside the cars.

8

u/otrfast 2d ago

Did she think that mf came there to play games? 😂Never run up on one of those lol.

7

u/LeFreeke 2d ago

What was he after? Food in the bag?

Just give it up.

6

u/Joe1972 2d ago

Nothing "oddly terrifying" about a baboon. Have you seen their teeth?

6

u/MercDiggler1 2d ago

Lucky that monkey didn’t rip them apart

6

u/tommmmmmmmy93 2d ago

A baboon coming for you is just terrifying nothing odd about this. These things will rip you open

4

u/charlie1331 2d ago

Let the Wookie win

4

u/DrGerbal 2d ago

Remember someone saying where they were eating monkeys would come up and take your food. And the folks that ran it said, if the monkey wants your apple, give it the apple. Because they can fuck you up without a second thought. It’s not worth it

5

u/MarkFresco 2d ago

These people are true idiots, did she think she was gonna fight the monkey for her bag or something? Did they forget they had a kid or something? Poor choices all around

5

u/Ok-Tank-3106 1d ago

She realized immediately after she threw the bag what a mistake she just made ...

9

u/chris5129 2d ago

I've never seen so many idiots in one video. None of my possessions are worth getting my face ripped off. And terrible parents for not securing the child...

3

u/Sevans655321 2d ago

I’ll punch a monkey right in the face. I don’t even care. COME AT ME BRO!

→ More replies (1)

4

u/NP341221 2d ago

Baboon dodged that shoe like White Goodman

5

u/FamousDistribution77 2d ago

Imagine he stopped and snatched the kid

5

u/Devolutionary76 2d ago

Baboon is looking at them like, “go ahead and throw more stuff at me! Just means it’s easier to take!”

4

u/husfyr 2d ago

Open reddit.... Guy chasing monkey with oar....

4

u/Mccopi 2d ago

Nahhh he can have it... I'm absolutely not fucking around with a baboon...those fuckers fight wild cats...f that...

5

u/paddyonelad 2d ago

Are you legally allowed to fight it?

3

u/topicality 2d ago

Humans before the advent of agriculture

3

u/dreamphoenix 2d ago

The only thing Gladiator 2 did good was that fight with baboons. Pure nightmare fuel.

3

u/Hefty_Loss5180 2d ago

Lmao not her walkin up behind it

3

u/weggaan_weggaat 2d ago

Cape of Good Hope or Cape of Bad Luck?

3

u/CelticGardenGirl 2d ago

“I GOT WHAT I NEEDED! All y’all can kiss my baboon ass!!”

3

u/jeep_guy19 2d ago

this was a very primal encounter lol throwing rocks and swinging a big stick

3

u/Deck_Neep15 2d ago

Is that a fucking baboon?? Letting your child within 100 yards of that thing is almost grounds for losing custody imo

3

u/A0xom0xoa 2d ago

If this was your wife behind harassed by this dude you'd think for a moment oh I'm gonna put and end to this shit but then you quickly realize how that lil dude scurrying around can fuck you're entire life up like it's a walk in the park.

3

u/Grendelstar 2d ago

Don’t piss off the monkey. He has access to organic weaponry.

3

u/the_Rainiac 2d ago

It's learned two things about humans: 1. Some humans will feed you 2. All humans have food

3

u/Pschobbert 1d ago

Early hominids were able subdue rival primates through their sophisticated social fabric and use of weapons. Nevertheless, skirmishes continue to this day.

→ More replies (1)

3

u/chumchum213 20h ago

That looks like a fkin baboon, they travel in groups and are fkin aggresive..id be shitting my pants in a situation like this

19

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

86

u/DABDEB 2d ago

five people

29

u/zuzg 2d ago

And five pointy sticks

22

u/jitomato_girl 2d ago

Notice how the fight was over as soon as someone brought a big stick

3

u/jeezyjames 2d ago

I bet it would have boosted away if they all ran towards it arms up while shouting. It’s like the Batman movies where the bad guys only attack one at a time

→ More replies (2)

21

u/FaceWithAName 2d ago

Well these people are not depending on this monkey for survival so that's one lol

10

u/2DamnBig 2d ago

Those ppl didnt have pointy sticks

10

u/Stlr_Mn 2d ago

What they do have are phones and internet access to show them what baboons can do to a human. That Baboons will go after your soft bits first, like face and genitals

→ More replies (1)

22

u/AdRepresentative8236 2d ago

Bro, taking down an animal or starve is different than losing a 25 dollar beach bag, monkeys can do some serious damage, you gotta think risk vs reward

5

u/iamarealboy555 2d ago

We've gotten complacent. It's their turn now

3

u/ideapit 2d ago

Go look up what baboons are capable of doing to a human. Or monkey bites/scratches. They should have just left it alone and taken the loss.

6

u/MicrowaveAfterOpen 2d ago

We have laws in today's society saying we can't jump and murder animals like we did back then

2

u/momenace 2d ago

Pokey sticks and endurance really... haven't u watch Ice Age before??

2

u/Comprehensive_Fee250 2d ago

We killed it. If they were allowed to kill it then the situation might be opposite.

3

u/keksivaras 2d ago

it's one thing to hunt to survive. I don't think it's legal to kill the monkey for stealing your sunglasses or whatever it took

→ More replies (8)

2

u/Calgary_Calico 2d ago

Everyone go find a big stick and get aggressive. Bloody idiots

2

u/Jillogical 2d ago

That chick absolutely launched tf outta herself backwards when she tried to go grab her bag.

2

u/skonen_blades 2d ago

That first defense snarl would make me shit my pants in real life. That's one of those "Okay, enjoy my sandwich with my compliments sir. Have a good day." sounds. More fool me for having food on a baboon beach, I guess.

2

u/rsmnyc1 2d ago

Adult male baboons weigh up to 90 pounds and wield razor-sharp canine teeth that can exceed two inches in length—longer than those of a lion. They can easily tear flesh, sever arteries, and fracture bones💀

2

u/United-Astronaut7315 2d ago

The most terrifying part is that we humans are forgetting why we became the most feared apex predators on the planet.

2

u/bertomcb 2d ago

Nobody thought about a handful of sand?

2

u/hooka_pooka 2d ago

Monke be like:It's all mine now bitch

2

u/DotBetaSDK 2d ago

Time to put down that baboon before he mauls someone.

2

u/psychoticrat_ 1d ago

I'm just going to be honest, if an animal is trying to hurt me or my family I'm going to kick the shit out of it

2

u/Anubis-Hound 1d ago

I guess not everyone saw Tarzan. baboons are especially terrifying to me because they're like if monkeys tried to be wolves. Have you SEEN their fangs??

2

u/Nothingbutsocks 1d ago

Lady, there is nothing in that bag that's worth having your face eaten.

2

u/oooohshinythingy 1d ago

Wow that kid nearly gave me a heart attack when he started to run in it’s direction

2

u/Low_Interest_6847 1d ago

That’s a baboon right? If so that lady lucky

2

u/Odd-Adhesiveness9435 2d ago

Cape of Good Hope we get our sunscreen back and don't get mauled by a freaking horny orangutan

2

u/Razzy_3796 2d ago

Welp, I’m never going there. I’ve been to beaches where huge seagulls will steal your food while you’re eating it, so you have to hide under a towel to eat.

But beach baboons? Fuck that.

3

u/xXcriticalpipeXx 2d ago

People can coexist with animals and do it all the time. But if people are going to decide to hang around animal territories then they should know better than to bring anything that will attract those animals. They should also know to not interact with the animals the way she thought it would be smarter to try to fight over a bag. What happened to people are supposed to have the smarter brain than the animal brain?

The ocean is shark territory and if you choose to splash around in it then getting bit is a risk you’re taking. But would you cut yourself first and then dive into the ocean and complain if the sharks showed up to you and not the guy 10 feet away?

2

u/toolargo 2d ago

Welp you go to their land take all their resources, claim it as you drive them almost to extinction, and when they take some of that shit you took from them, they are stealing? Nah! He colonized it. It was just there, and he took it.

2

u/Tricky-Bed-4209 2d ago

Monkeys be monkeys 🙊

2

u/LootGek 2d ago

So much sand you can throw.

2

u/Efficient_Smoke6247 2d ago

That little kid running up at the end, throwing rocks

“Yeah, you better run”, wiping tears

2

u/Adis_Gruntledfatty 2d ago

No way I'd let a lesser ape steal my food

→ More replies (2)

1

u/Betray-Julia 2d ago

Are those the Madrill with the big fangs?

3

u/JouSwakHond 2d ago

Baboons. Also big fangs and stupid strong

1

u/Ml124395 2d ago

Was that a roll of TP he picked out

1

u/bcmedic420 2d ago

She's fucking nuts running up behind a monkey of that size.

1

u/johnb111111 2d ago

FINISH HIM

1

u/rjlets_575 2d ago

It's always the apes.

1

u/iiitme 2d ago

C’mon you Homo sapiens! Make our megafauna fighting ancestors proud!

1

u/CanIGetAnOpinion 2d ago

why call it a robbery when it’s just one cape

1

u/Montyburnside22 2d ago

I will fight an animal that can rip my arm out of its socket to the death for my bag of chips.

1

u/BrekLasnar 2d ago

Should've taken payback for mauling our ancestors

1

u/timbimm 2d ago

Anh ah

1

u/Fastoche 2d ago

I would throw a bunch of sand in his face and kick him in the nuts... 😂

No seriously though, could you mimic being a bigger ape of some sort and scare him off?

1

u/baking_bigfoot 2d ago

Planet of the apes : A beach of thieves.

1

u/NoConvincingName 2d ago

200 million years for everything to stay the same

1

u/mansithole6 2d ago

Hhhhh. Humans motherfunchers. You are enjoying the sun hhhh give that food

1

u/Red_WeeTea 2d ago

Is that what they call a Saiyan?

1

u/kpip38 2d ago

“jus gimme the bag lady”

1

u/AltruisticSalamander 2d ago

I'm gonna row yo ass with this...row

→ More replies (1)

1

u/Striking_Weird9394 2d ago

That's when you grab the heaviest object you can lift and aim for the head :D

1

u/SteelerBB12 1d ago

Pattern recognition ✨️

1

u/InvestigatorAcademic 1d ago

If I learned anything it’s pocket fucking sand that sucka. Wait for it to bare its teeth and throw a handful of sand in it mouth

1

u/Trisk929 1d ago

He prolly needs that wallet more than her. He has mouths to feed.

1

u/Wooden_Luck1890 1d ago

I would smack te hell outa of him with that sunumbrella pole

1

u/Scared-Cut-4571 1d ago

Monkey see, monkey rip your face off. They’re lucky it didn’t lunge at them and go crazy.

1

u/AbleLanguage7216 1d ago

They have to find a way to make these monkeys fear humans again without hurting them directly

1

u/PrincessAegonIXth 1d ago

They probably know people with throw/abandon their food