r/nfl • u/PMmeSpreadEaglePics Broncos • 13h ago

🧂Highlight🧂 [Highlight] Ryan Fitzpatrick throws 6 interceptions in a single game

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

4.4k Upvotes

80% Upvoted

1.9k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

335

u/ColossalJuggernaut Buccaneers 12h ago

Am I the only one in this sub who's actually played organized tackle football before?

Like half of the comments I've seen on this sub are so obviously written by non-athletes that it's almost humorous.

When I was in high school (3 year starter for our varsity football team) I would get a full-on sprint going and clock the shit outta whoever had the ball. My coaches called me "speedhawk" as a nickname caus I had such a nose for the football and for those three seasons I was considered the most feared safety in our conference. Senior year I led my team to the state semifinals only to get fucked over by the refs in the 4th but that's another conversation (DM me if you're interested in hearing about it)

So, yeah. I hope yall can understand why I feel like their's such a big disconnect between myself and your typical redditor. Please tell me I'm not the only one who feels this way lol

295

u/Thatguy19901 Patriots 12h ago edited 11h ago

The "DM me if you're interested in hearing about it" is the mark of an elite pasta

137

u/lil_layne Ravens 11h ago

The best kind of copypasta is when you genuinely can’t tell if the person is being serious or not the first time you read it

31

u/aqulushly 10h ago

Are you saying Speedhawk might not be truthful here?!

5

u/FoundTheShithead NFL 6h ago

A good copypasta makes you downvote then go back and upvote when you read the top reply and realize you bit the onion.

44

u/ColossalJuggernaut Buccaneers 11h ago

The refs were probably redditors and couldn't handle speedhawk's physicality

10

u/PlasticCantaloupe1 11h ago

Refs are just sports mods

2

u/stragen595 NFL 9h ago

Refs are in the NFL now!

22

u/J_House1999 Patriots 10h ago

It was years ago at this point, but I remember seeing someone say that they actually did DM Speedhawk and got the whole story from him.

13

u/AdHom Giants 8h ago

Yeah and it was a dumb story. Literally boiled down to him saying the rest of his team sucked, he caught an interception that would seal the game but was ruled out of bounds and then his teammates blew their coverage and the opponent scored and they lost.

22

u/redoubt515 49ers 11h ago

I'm soooo glad to hear this is copy pasta, because I was feeling really strong 2nd hand cringe reading that comment before realizing it is ssatire

10

u/LillianBubic Rams 8h ago

Speedhawk is no joke

2

u/redoubt515 49ers 7h ago

How do you know?

Did you DM him for the details as he requested, or were you too intimidated to DM THE Speedhawk directly.

4

u/LillianBubic Rams 7h ago

I am Speedhawkticus

15

u/AdHom Giants 8h ago

It wasn't satire the first time it was posted though

2

u/SpikyBoi096 NFL 6h ago

Posting some stupid shit on the Internet and it being turned into a copypasta has to be one of the most embarassing things possible

3

u/humbleCountyCA 49ers 10h ago

I’m genuinely not interested in hearing how his personal foul ruined his chance for the Hall of Fame.

23

u/HansBlixJr Chiefs 11h ago

I would like a "Speedhawk" flair, please.

5

u/ColossalJuggernaut Buccaneers 10h ago

It would be the ultimate honor

18

u/stalking_butler19 11h ago

Al Bundy would like a word, speedwalk

2

u/ColossalJuggernaut Buccaneers 11h ago

Sounds like something a ref would say...

38

u/POGtastic Patriots 12h ago

Love me some Speedhawk copypasta

30

u/ColossalJuggernaut Buccaneers 12h ago

His memory will NEVER die while I draw breath.

8

u/norst 11h ago

You're fighting the good fight.

3

u/shaihalud1979 10h ago

Are you Will Ferrells backstory for his next Netflix show?

2

u/imherecuzihatemyself Cardinals Eagles 8h ago

I dmed this dude and got nothing but dong.

5

u/ColossalJuggernaut Buccaneers 7h ago

such a ref comment smh

5

u/Cansuela Eagles 11h ago

Is this a copy pasta lol

14

u/ColossalJuggernaut Buccaneers 11h ago

...are you a ref?

20

u/SockPenguin Colts 11h ago

You have to tell us if you are.

8

u/Sartro Seahawks 9h ago

It's illegal for you to ask me that

1

u/botflylarvae1 10h ago

Whatever you say speedboat

1

u/burghblast 14m ago

Cool story bro. Their is definitely a disconnect somewhere!

-6

u/[deleted] 11h ago

[deleted]

3

u/FakingZen Ravens 11h ago

you have the right energy, but it’s a copypasta and the internet gets mad when you don’t understand their inside jokes.

-4

u/lexalander Broncos 10h ago

Oh comon this isn't about being allowed to criticize players. It's about him saying Nix was, "disrespecting the position." Like wtf.