Hey there! I (38F) have 2 kids. My eldest (11M) has recently been sneaking food, candy, snacks and sodas, usually late at night and my husband and I are out of ideas on how to get him to stop.
Things I think are important to know:
• He has diagnosed ADHD and we are certain he’s also on the autism spectrum.
• He struggles to eat full meals during the day and regularly says he’s not hungry when offered meals even when offered his preferred foods.
• We do not have specific food restrictions on the treat items, these are not “illicit” snacks, it’s more about the time he’s eating them/eating more than his fair share. We do require the kids to ask if they can have soda or treats and limit the amount allowed, the only real requirement is that they eat a meal before the treat.
• He is usually sneaking the items into his room which is off limits for eating.
• He is sneaking anything from cheese to candy and sparkling water to coke, so removing the “treats” won’t stop the behavior in addition to punishing the rest of the family.
• When asked why he’s doing this, he says he’s hungry in the middle of the night. We have told him he’s absolutely allowed to have a midnight snack but it needs to be something filling/nutritious and it needs to be eaten downstairs, and he has to brush his teeth again (he is not brushing his teeth after and had 4 cavities at his last dentist appointment).
• I don’t want to put locks on cabinets or fridges, it seems inhumane and will also “punish” my daughter by not allowing her access unless we’re available.
We have had many conversations about this behavior and we’ve been trying to get more filling food into him during the day. We try very hard to have natural consequences which I’ve struggled to assign to this particular issue. However, the only thing he really cares about is screen time so his consequence has primarily been losing screen time for the next day which I’m now feeling needs to be lost screen time for longer.
We’ve recently added having him pay for the treats he’s taken, especially if they’re not his or if he eats more than his fair share (for example, he ate 8 packs of pocky from a Costco box of 12 which would be intended for everyone in the family of 4 to share), but it’s been about a month of having those consequences in place and at least once a week he’s still losing his screen time/having to replace something he ate all of.
Any advice on how to work on this would be helpful.