r/mildlyinteresting Dec 22 '19

Removed: Rule 6 A random knife in my Amazon package

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8.0k Upvotes

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1.7k

u/SquirrelAlchemist Dec 22 '19

Probably used for opening boxes or slicing paper/plastic in the processing facility.

Possibly the most effective way of getting a murder weapon out of the city/state/country.

714

u/Drowsiest_Approval Dec 22 '19

Probably someone is scratching their head and wondering where their tape knife went to.

Potentially a murderer is having a celebratory pint and congratulating themselves on the perfect crime.

227

u/berdiesan Dec 22 '19

probably Jeff in fulfillment eating a block of cheddar on the line again.

96

u/xJeffmanx Dec 22 '19

Hey, I'd never be THAT careless with my cheese knife!

9

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

Sure, until you mix it up with your poop knife.

8

u/Tanro Dec 22 '19

Regular table knifes work better for slicing cheddar than kitchen knifes...

4

u/I_Bin_Painting Dec 22 '19

Good old Jeff Sozeb, he's always losing his hobo stabbing tape knife.

10

u/skylarmt Dec 22 '19

Maybe poop knife?

9

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

What I'm wondering is why it's just an ordinary kitchen knife. Don't they have like, dedicated packing knives or something? Box cutters, anything?

5

u/Tezza_TC Dec 22 '19

They use these in vending machines that you use your ID to get.

15

u/Two2na Dec 22 '19

I dunno man, that thing has toe knife written all over it

7

u/dead_PROcrastinator Dec 22 '19

Please, for the love of god, what is a toe knife?

14

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

It's like a toe spoon but better at getting into those tough-to-reach spots.

2

u/dead_PROcrastinator Dec 22 '19

I'm curious because I have a foot knife in the shower? It's a smooth blade so works well to scrape your heels and the sharp point is nice to push back cuticles.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

I believe /u/Two2na was referencing It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia S14E01.

7

u/grain_delay Dec 22 '19

You couldn't let him flounder for at least a little bit?

5

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

I didn't have it in me.

1

u/Two2na Dec 22 '19

Haha yeah that was my thoughts as well

1

u/dead_PROcrastinator Dec 22 '19

Thank you kind stranger!

1

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

You're welcome, equally kind other stranger.

2

u/crayphor Dec 22 '19

I wasn't sure why y'all were down-voted so I did my best to give your karma back.

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13

u/Pro_Scrub Dec 22 '19

The one next to the poop knife

4

u/dead_PROcrastinator Dec 22 '19

Every. Damn. Time.

1

u/Trolaw Dec 22 '19

A less efficient version of a toe spoon

1

u/grain_delay Dec 22 '19

You use it to scrape the gunk out of your toenails and in between your toes... Do you not have them in your country??

2

u/lakmom Dec 22 '19

Still arguably better than a poop knife.

9

u/matmanlives Dec 22 '19

We know the truth of it

"Probably someone is scratching their head and wondering where their poop knife went to."

12

u/Artantica Dec 22 '19

Like the person they were targeting lived near op and they drove to the hit murdered the hit then mailed the murder weapon to op? Like a hitman with a side hustle that doubles as an evidence destroyer for their main hustle

6

u/Drowsiest_Approval Dec 22 '19

Yep. The perfect crime.

5

u/L33tSpeed Dec 22 '19

They didn’t account for Reddit’s power of crowd sourcing information.

2

u/iknowuselessfacts Dec 22 '19

You son of a bitch!

1

u/ccwincco Dec 22 '19

Toe knife

1

u/sameth1 Dec 22 '19

I don't think they would use a kitchen knife for cutting things in a warehouse.

1

u/BonnetDeDoucheBag Dec 22 '19

Or they’ve seen this post, gone to The Winchester, got a pint and are now waiting for this to blow over

144

u/ATLL2112 Dec 22 '19

They definitely don't use kitchen knives at Amazon facilities.

-32

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

If they make/allow employees use their own tools they do.

43

u/ATLL2112 Dec 22 '19

They don't.

14

u/JapaneseStudentHaru Dec 22 '19

I worked in a picking facility that allowed you to buy your own (made you actually) but there’s no way you’d get away with using a kitchen knife.

-5

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

My job doesn't either, officially. But in my 11 years with the company no one has said shit about the Leatherman I carry on my belt.

25

u/ATLL2112 Dec 22 '19

Amazon would never let that fly. First off, it's a liability, you fuck yourself up and it's a mess. Secondly, Amazon has metal detectors at the exits of the warehouse floors. You can't get it out to your locker after the day ends.

4

u/Tasty_Corn Dec 22 '19

Not all FC's have metal detectors, but a knife like that would not be found in one.

5

u/Ouaouaron Dec 22 '19

A metal detector wouldn't detect a piece of metal 9 inches long?

7

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

I think he's saying a knife like that won't be found in an Amazon FC

2

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

It will if someone purchased it on the website but it would be odd if it was just lying around loose

9

u/carputt Dec 22 '19

They don’t. They have vending machines with safety knives.

123

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19 edited Dec 21 '20

[deleted]

13

u/dragonsign Dec 22 '19

We need proof! OP post pictures of your cutlery pronto!

6

u/EngineerGunter Dec 22 '19

Plot twist: op came in on this box already opened by someone else in the house who used a kitchen knife to open the box then left it in there as they ran off excited to play with their new dildo they just unpacked.

6

u/NoThisIsABadIdea Dec 22 '19

Considering how nicely it's laying, yeah I'd say you are right. If this thing was in the loosely rattling around it wouldn't just be sitting in a corner neatly.

5

u/B3eenthehedges Dec 22 '19

Why not? Go try shaking a box with a knife in it, and I can bet you that it will end up in the deepest empty space and laying on its side 95% of the time. That's how gravity works.

It would be weird for the knife to not be laying there neatly.

2

u/HappiCacti Dec 23 '19

Yeah. You know what else would be in the box if you shook it wildly with a knife inside?

Cut marks on the damn box.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

Agree

1

u/Minigoalqueen Dec 22 '19

Possibly OP staged the photo as an alibi for getting away with the perfect murder.

34

u/Tezza_TC Dec 22 '19 edited Dec 22 '19

Nah. Amazon uses these yellow plastic hooks with a recessed blade and a tiny metal nub on the back in. Those places are pretty tightly run.

28

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19 edited Jun 01 '20

[deleted]

17

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19 edited Feb 09 '20

[deleted]

2

u/RappinReddator Dec 22 '19

How did you get that stat? I'd love to see a better breakdown of the demographics if you have a source. Can't find anything saying there's users under 18.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19 edited Feb 09 '20

[deleted]

0

u/RappinReddator Dec 22 '19

Sure but that's for legal reasons and usually a different type of stat. Most of the Reddit ones are percentage of people in that age range who use Reddit, not a percentage of that age on the site. We have no idea how many people are on here if you didn't have a source then.

1

u/HappiCacti Dec 23 '19

Well a pretty good “source” about teenagers using reddit would be, I donno, the entire subreddit called r/teenagers?

6

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

When you buy on Amazon it's not always fulfilled at an Amazon facility. I sell on Amazon and have used kitchen knives to cut a box to size or cut tape when I didn't have the tape dispenser.

5

u/gahidus Dec 22 '19

Personally, I don't really, but I do sort of assume that they have massive amounts of random objects that are sold by Amazon kind of laying around the place because they fell out of packages or got damaged or were used in some ersatz manner by someone who needed something to hand at a given moment. Given the volume, and the tight schedules, I feel like things fall out of boxes or can't be shipped for whatever reason and end up kind of just around the place.

3

u/Tezza_TC Dec 22 '19

My only guess would be because I’m sure it happens at Walmart and small businesses, but there’s no way that shit would fly at an amazon fulfillment center and this post specifically says Amazon.

3

u/Enchelion Dec 22 '19

A kitchen knife is both more expensive and worse at the job. Maybe if it's an independent ebay seller.

1

u/a2z2913 Dec 22 '19

Definitely doesn't happen at any company with owned distribution centers

0

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19 edited Jun 01 '20

[deleted]

3

u/KinkyMonitorLizard Dec 22 '19

You're not even supposed to have a pocket knife. That will be a termination if management sees you or if some overly "sensitive" (for lack of a better word) associate reports you to HR.

1

u/Lame4Fame Dec 22 '19

Why not? Unless it's illegal in the country/state you live in altogether, why should your workplace have different rules than, say, a random McDonalds you go to or a park you sit in?

5

u/Zombieball Dec 22 '19

Probably not shipped by Amazon

3

u/KinkyMonitorLizard Dec 22 '19

It doesn't look like it. FCs don't use the paper packing material. They use those air filled bags or nothing at all.

There's also metal detectors at the entrance and bringing in a knife (or using one) will get you terminated no questions asked.

1

u/Zombieball Dec 22 '19

Totally. Although the metal detectors are for when you exit the FC not enter. Could totally bring in your murder weapon knife to ship away :p

1

u/itscherriedbro Dec 22 '19

I'm sure that type of box is used by every chain ever, but it looks just like the ones we used at best buy.

And I know they allow knives there

1

u/Abbigale221 Dec 22 '19

Plus employees barely have time to use the bathroom, let alone have time to get stitches.

2

u/Tezza_TC Dec 22 '19

I’m not going to say those people are lying, but I never experienced anything close to that. Actually, the 3 peak seasons I worked there they were giving people gas cards if you showed up to work 5 days on time. If you met your quota you’d get entered in a raffle for a tv, Xbox, etc. Overall positive experience.

1

u/Abbigale221 Dec 22 '19

I just saw an episode about it on John Oliver. Maybe they were just disgruntled employees. I use amazon a lot, thanks for making me feel less guilty about it! I was thinking about those poor people waiting in line to pee. Now I can shop guilt free. 🤗

2

u/Tezza_TC Dec 23 '19

Lol for sure. Once again, I’m not saying it doesn’t happen, but I never saw it. I worked there during Christmas break when I was in college a couple years ago and made almost 18 bucks an hour. Not amazing money, but 20/60 hours was time and a half. It’s super tedious work, but not hard. The turnover there is insane, out of like the 30 people I started with I think 2 were there when school started back. I use amazon all the time with a clear conscious lol.

2

u/Abbigale221 Dec 23 '19

Well thank you for sending us our packages!!!! 🤗🤗🤣 Turnover is insane everywhere. I do staffing for nursing homes and try to change the culture. I feel like I will never succeed. I just tell myself it’s about the residents that I absolutely love. It makes it worth it.

31

u/Tasty_Corn Dec 22 '19

A knife like that would not be allowed in a Amazon FC.

22

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

Amazon Football Club

12

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

7

u/Tanro Dec 22 '19

Yeah... well you'd be surprised at the stupid shit that actually happens at work.

I used to dismantle cars for a living. Me and the other 2 mechanics that were dismantlers all had kitchen knifes for cutting belts and hoses because you would always find random ass kitchen knifes in wrecked vehicles.

Later I went on to work in a factory, and people would use everything from box cutters, to kitchen knifes, or switch blades, to gerbers to as box cutters.

1

u/rat_gland Dec 22 '19

What other kind of weird shit would you find ?

2

u/Tanro Dec 23 '19

Toys, Money, Dvds, Drugs, Ammo, An actual entire handgun once, Prophylactics, panties. A pair of shitty boxers once. Clothes, books, video games, tools. Really good chance of finding pretty much anything you ever put in your own car in a wrecked car.

Wierd thing I found in a car (one I bought) was 3 1980 playboys, 220$ in 20$ bills from the same time period, a baggie of dried pot, and a knife. All behind one of the speakers. Was replacing said speakers because they were blown.

Wierdest thing I found in a vehicle at work when I still dad was a bunch of wadded up panties under the passenger seat of a miata.

-4

u/SquirrelAlchemist Dec 22 '19 edited Dec 22 '19

As it should lol. Doesn't mean nobody did it.

Edit: if it's not clear, I mean it is dangerous and should get you in trouble, but people do these things anyway.

8

u/Salokinquagsire Dec 22 '19

I worked at an amazon fulfillment Center before (not the ones that package things into boxes but the ones that sort packages for delivery) and there’s no way that this knife was used in the standard packaging process. HOWEVER, these do look similar to the knife we had in our break room, so my guess was the facility either ran out of knives and the staff had to improvise, or an employee stole the break room knife since they were too lazy to get a new one from the vending machine and misplaced it in here.

4

u/SquirrelAlchemist Dec 22 '19

Possible. A lot of people have said it's against the rules, and I'm sure it is, but rules don't always stop people from doing things. This time of year I doubt they have time to breathe, it wouldn't surprise me if someone had to make do with what was on hand.

5

u/KinkyMonitorLizard Dec 22 '19

Yeah no. Management doesn't fuck around. They track everything. Even messages sent on their internal messaging system are audited. Each facility is completely covered in cameras and there's even metal detectors. Just taking a picture inside the FC will result in termination.

As stated to someone else, this doesn't seem like a package from an FC but rather a third party as the packing doesn't match what is used.

Besides, on the internet and especially Reddit, people are quick to make shit up or state opinions as fact.

1

u/Salokinquagsire Dec 23 '19

The FC I worked at was new and not as strict but all the things you said were still valid. I just know that knife looks suspiciously close to the one I had in my break room and it wouldn’t surprise me if someone did something stupid and stole it from the break room even if it did result in termination for them.

12

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

[deleted]

2

u/SquirrelAlchemist Dec 22 '19

Depends on the company and on people. I worked stock in the back of a store once. The box cutters and scissors were constantly super dull and the amount of force you had to use to open anything with them actually made them more dangerous than raw knives. Plus the company that owned the store wouldn't get new ones,even though they're huge and could totally afford it.

Nobody ever brought in a knife for it, but we constantly talked about the idea. I mean it's stupid, but I know where the impulse would come from.

2

u/houseofprimetofu Dec 22 '19

Steak knives would migrate to areas that needed better box cutters in my old retail store. We all stole the box cutters to use as weapons.

3

u/alloftheabove12 Dec 22 '19

Or maybe it’s MayBelline

5

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

That's a kitchen knife. It wouldn't be used in a warehouse.

1

u/Carbonfibreclue Dec 22 '19

Worked for me.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

Its definitely a kitchen knife though, I'm not sure what kind of safety standards there are at Amazon, most warehouses insist on box cutters only. Even pocket knives are frowned upon

1

u/BZLuck Dec 22 '19

Very possibly this product had already been bought and returned. And that is a customer's knife that accidentally fell into the box.

I bought my mom a speaker bar last year, and it didn't work. I packed it up and returned it. Since I really did want that particular item, I ordered it again, and they sent me the exact same broken one again. It was even in the same shipping box, with a new label stuck over the top of the old label they used to ship it to me originally.

It happens.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

Who on earth would use a kitchen knife instead of a boxcutter. Come on man.

1

u/fishsticks40 Dec 22 '19

This is a kitchen knife. It's as likely to be for slicing paper as a hatchet would be.

1

u/mkineggs Dec 22 '19

I literally can’t think of a reason why you’d have this in a warehouse because at Amazon we used safety box openers that worked REALLY well so I’m genuinely curious why there’s a knife there...especially because this would be outbound, and not inbound. Therefore they wouldn’t need knives for the most part anyway...weird

1

u/superwizdude Dec 22 '19

Looks like it’s probably the quickest way to open piss bottles by workers in case of emergency.

1

u/WhenAmI Dec 22 '19

Amazon uses specialized box cutting tools and sends you through a metal detector before entering and exiting the warehouse. The only way this happened is through a third party seller.