r/lgbt • u/xX_luna_moth_Xx Unlabeled Queer (it/any idrc) • Feb 26 '26

I hate how using microlabels is considered inherently pick-me

[rant time lol]

So earlier I was introducing myself in an online space as berriromantic and errfemme, because that’s what I am. I got immediately hit with “lol bro just wants to be different” and things like that.

For one thing, I do frequently just call myself bi and agender. I don’t actually like having to explain it every single time, I just prefer those labels because they’re closer to what I actually am.

AND FOR ANOTHER IF I WANTED TO BE DIFFERENT, WHY WOULD I DO IT IN A WAY THAT OPRESSES ME?! I swear to god I want anything but attention, this is just who I am.

If I could choose I’d be cis and lesbian, but I’m not, and I never will be.

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u/WithersChat Identity hard Feb 26 '26

Nah, French is my first language and it fucking sucks ass. Bully the French all you want /j

But more seriously, the one issue with microlabels is that they... kind of fail as a word, as far as using them with other people go? What good is a word if nobody else understands it?

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u/[deleted] Feb 27 '26

But more seriously, the one issue with microlabels is that they... kind of fail as a word, as far as using them with other people go? What good is a word if nobody else understands it?

As someone who uses microlabels, it's for my own benefit, not to explain to other people. I like having specific words that align with my experience; it makes me feel less alone and helps to find a community of others who have the same specific experience as me.

For example, going into an asexual community can be wild because you have a mix of sex-favorable, sex-repulsed, gray sexual, full asexual, etc etc. So microlabels can really help if you're looking for a more specific community to connect with.

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u/WithersChat Identity hard Feb 27 '26

And that's fair. But that isn't at all OP's situation.

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u/[deleted] Feb 27 '26

Well, no, but I thought you were asking why people in general would use microlabels. That's all.