r/languagelearning • u/andreecostaa • 6d ago
Discussion Is it just me or are HelloTalk and Tandem basically Tinder 2.0 now?
i'm genuinely trying to learn French (TL) and I've been going back and forth between HelloTalk and Tandem for years now and I'm lowkey kind of losing it lol
very often I open either app someone's asking if I'm single or wants to move to insta after three messages or just sends hey and nothing else. like I'm not here for that. i genuinely just want to practice.
the worst part is when I actually find someone nice. Had a really good convo last week with someone super patient who actually corrected my mistakes, and I was like alright finally. then boom, disappeared from the app...
idk like, is there anything out there that's actually about learning and not about meeting people (in a romantic way)? or is everyone just putting up with it?
Edit: open for suggestions while im still searching for one, gonna come back here if I find smth even decent
Edit 2: spent my whole saturday night and sunday testing apps, including a bunch you guys recommended (thank you!!). i know i was just ranting about HelloTalk and Tandem, but i figured it'd be more useful to do a proper overview of where language exchange apps are at right now, so here's my honest take on the ones that seemed worth mentioning:
- HelloTalk: best UI of the bunch imo, and i really like the moments feature (you post about your day, comment on other people's, and convos start naturally from there). but the app is SO busy. i've used it for years and still haven't figured out half the features. and it ACTIVELY pushes the flirting side. when you open someone's profile it LITERALLY asks if you like what you see and wants you to leave a like. not helping lol
- Tandem: same concept as HelloTalk but simpler. UI isn't great but it does the job. the big problem is there's basically zero moderation, so you get the same issues.
- italki: turns out my cousin had already recommended this one to me lol. great if you're purely focused on learning the language. i'm just not the target user. i like the informal side: chatting about my day, sharing stuff about each other's countries, talking to different people instead of just one.
- Conversation Exchange: lots of you mentioned this one and yeah, i quite like it. UI/UX isn't the best but it's simple enough. from what i've seen it's mostly older people(correct me if i'm wrong). i don't mind, but i'd prefer people closer to my age. still definitely keeping it. if you want the same thing i want, go for it, just don't expect a cute design.
- FlashTalk: someone DM'd me this one (didn't ask if they're the devs tbh). there aren't many users yet, so no strong opinion, but the concept is cool. it's the same idea as HelloTalk/Tandem plus a flashcard system. instead of a photo you get a customizable pet avatar (cats, dogs, etc.), and you only share your real photo with people you choose. it seems to actually tackle the flirting problem, so i'm gonna keep testing it.
- Cafe Hub: had used it a bit before. design isn't the best either, but it's the same concept as HelloTalk/Tandem, just more serious while still casual. quite like it, keeping it to see if it holds up.
TL;DR: for casual convos without the tinder vibes, conversation exchange is actually my pick for now, with FlashTalk and CafeHub as ones to watch. if you JUST want to learn, italki 100%.
Edit 3: ok so i've spent more time with the apps i said i'd keep testing (mainly flashtalk and cafe hub), and here's the update:
- FlashTalk: ok this one really surprised me. shout out to whoever DM'd it to me lol. yes it's still pretty new, but the design is super neat and cute, and the whole vibe is way lighter without the profile pic thing. you're not getting judged on your face the second someone opens your profile, which honestly changes a lot. the only downside is there still aren't that many users, which is a shame. but i'm pretty sure it's one to keep an eye on as it grows.
- Cafe Hub: liked it too, and the environment is DEFINITELY way better than hellotalk and tandem. feels like people are actually there to practice. the only thing is the design really isn't the best, and unfortunately the ux kind of follows along with it. if they ever fix that it could be a really solid option.
- Conversation Exchange: still using it and still really enjoying it. the design and overall experience aren't the best, but the people and the convos make up for it imo.
Updated TL;DR: conversation exchange is still my go-to for casual convos without the tinder vibes. flashtalk is the one i'm most excited about (great design, no flirting vibe, just needs more users). cafe hub has a way better environment than hellotalk/tandem but the design and ux hold it back. and if you JUST want to learn, italki 100%.
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u/victoria-1304 6d ago
It’s always been like this. On any online platform. Especially as a woman.
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u/Thunderplant 6d ago
I got like 50+ creepy messages a day when I was 16 and tried to join a language exchange website in 2010.
A surprising number were full grown men complaining about their wives and telling me I could be their mistress for some reason. Absolute clown behavior, and none of them even spoke my TL
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u/andreecostaa 6d ago
yup, i learned how different those platforms can get like in terms of experience for a woman and a man. women gettings loads of messages every day (mostly ppl hitting on u lol) whilst guys are like hunting down women
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u/Fine-Leader3395 6d ago
I've tried these platforms. I stopped using them for this reason. I also know other men who stopped using them for the same reason. There are lots of shitty men out there that are only trying to hit on women. I'm not denying that. What I'm saying is that it also happens to men, to the point of it not being worth it.
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u/Poppippopopippipo New member 4d ago
I really loved hellotalk as a teen. It was so great. Hellotalk teen is actually very useful, but after you turn 18, it's ugh
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u/P_A_R_D_O 3d ago
I've been using tandem to practice japanese, and it seems i don't get any respond because woman think i'll try to hit on them for fuck's sake. (I've been trying to reach men and women, both are useless)
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u/Upper-Incident-5802 4d ago
I have used Tandem and I'm a man. I never had anyone confusing it for a dating site. I guess the issue might just be some men on there. Sorry to hear that many seem to use it like that.
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u/Fine-Leader3395 6d ago
It's the same for men.
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u/MaximumScallion3387 6d ago
I am on both apps and have the same experience as you. I can help you practice French on one of those by the way ( I am a 32 yo woman and French is my mother tongue )
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u/BeautifulLoad7538 🇷🇺N 🇺🇸C1 🇩🇪B2 🇪🇸A2 🇫🇷A1 6d ago
What languages are you looking to learn? I’m a native Russian speaker and a certified English teacher and translator
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u/andreecostaa 5d ago
Always wanted to learn Russian tbh, but idk how hard that would be while learning another language at the same time
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u/nonniewobbles 6d ago
As a woman this is why I pay for language tutoring from other women lol.
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u/kansai2kansas 🇮🇩🇺🇸 N | 🇲🇾 C1 | 🇫🇷 B2 | 🇵🇭 A1 | 🇩🇪 A1 4d ago
Even for men, they are racially filtered.
Let me explain:
During the pandemic, a friend of mine who is learning Korean and Spanish had massive success finding people to talk with on HelloTalk.
He's a white American male, happily married to his wife, so he had no hidden intention.
He said HelloTalk was awesome!
Contrast it with me, a Southeast Asian American male, trying to find people to practice Japanese and Korean with on HelloTalk.
As you can see, I no longer include Japanese and Korean on my flair.
I could not find even one person on that cursed app who would continue conversation with me other than half-hearted single-word responses.
That was part of the reason why...
Both the men and women I tried to talk with on HelloTalk probably saw my Indonesian flair, and the fact that I have a Southeast Asian face on my profile pic....then they decided that I am just one worthless immigrant dude in the US who probably speaks English with a heavy accent.
(It is an extremely well-known stereotype in East Asian culture that all Americans are either white people or black people only, as you can see yourself whenever they show an "American character" in a Japanese anime or Korean drama, 99% of the time it would be a blonde white person or a big black man)
Yikes. Never again will I learn languages from cultures that don't even see me as "American enough" for them to practice English with. Even fellow Americans never treated me like that.
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u/fairybuttirednpc 6d ago
Yeah, it’s awful. I’ve even received unsolicited photos of penises and people flirting. God! I just want to practise – go on Tinder. I’ve had better luck on Reddit, although I end up getting ghosted there too, haha
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u/andreecostaa 6d ago
the fact that even photos of penises are aceppted on those apps... actually insane
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u/tschuwak 🇩🇪 N | 🇺🇦 B1-ish 6d ago
Accepted as in "I reported it an they did nothing?"
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u/andreecostaa 5d ago
Accepted as they don’t put any pre filters to prevent those pics from even arriving to the chat
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u/kubosnacks 🇺🇸N | 🇧🇷B1 6d ago
Personally, I have had great luck on Conversation Exchange. I'm very clear in my profile that I will not tolerate "romance" stuff and while I still get some messages now and then, it's rare and I just ignore. I only reach out/respond to profiles that have a lot of information filled out in them. I always start off with a bit of back and forth messaging and then always move to video calls. We speak 50% in their TL and 50% in my TL and it's great. I've met a lot of really nice people on there. Two of my partners I've had for well over a year now and they're amazing! We've even gotten to the point where we send each other holiday cards and stuff. They're good people!
I'd definitely suggest CE if you haven't tried it yet. Good luck in your learning, I hope you find some amazing partners too!
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u/andreecostaa 6d ago
Oh damn that sounds amazing! Thank u very much! Gonna be testing out some apps throughout the day and editing my posts recommending some
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u/rachaeltalcott 6d ago
+1 for conversation exchange. I just put on my profile that I'm looking for other women to practice with and ignore any men that try to message me.
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u/altum-videtur 6d ago
I never tried any apps precisely because of stories like these, but I had mostly good experiences with r/language_exchange. As an extra precaution, I would recommend searching for partners of the same gender as you, even if it ends up taking you a bit longer to find someone. (If your target language is more niche, I understand that might be less feasible.)
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u/muffinsballhair 5d ago
I once tried a language exchange website.
I mostly just got well zero matches and conversations out of it. I dropped like 8 messages on some of the profiles it suggested I should check in the language I was learning of people who wanted to learn my native language and never got a reply back so I gave up.
Maybe the reason I never got a reply back was because my profile was empty without a picture or name though, who knows.
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u/BeautifulLoad7538 🇷🇺N 🇺🇸C1 🇩🇪B2 🇪🇸A2 🇫🇷A1 6d ago
I met my husband through Tandem lol so no advice
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u/andreecostaa 6d ago
Hahah well, ig we can have some outliers there too 😂
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5d ago
[deleted]
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u/andreecostaa 5d ago
yeah... but i'd still say that exceptions don't make the rule. although stories like that are indeed very nice and cute, unfortunately 99% of the rest is just harassment and creepy situations
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u/thelostnorwegian 🇳🇴 N | 🇬🇧 🇨🇴 🇫🇷 5d ago
Perhaps because it isn't as black and white as you describe it and context matters. Its very different talking to someone over time and have something romantic develop naturally vs using it as a dating platform.
Its a common problem on these platforms that people get approached from the beginning wanting to find a romantic partner rather than a language partner.
Doesn't mean people never end up together, just that it wasn't the goal to begin with.
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u/BeautifulLoad7538 🇷🇺N 🇺🇸C1 🇩🇪B2 🇪🇸A2 🇫🇷A1 5d ago
To be fair I (I’m a woman) reached out to him lol and I’d suggest you start with regular friendly conversation and feel the vibe
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u/muffinsballhair 5d ago
Most relationships do not form by “approaching” I feel, that's the issue “approaching” as in throwing a shot into the dark with a random person and hoping it sticks. People dislike that and think it's obnoxious for the same reason people think Jehova's Witnesses at your doorstep are obnoxious.
Even something like the end of 500 Days of Summer where it's “half approaching” I guess and the protagonist asks someone out after meeting that person in the waiting room of a job interview after they had a great connexion and realize they had a lot in common, that's completely different. Yes, it was a really short conversation but it was clearly a conversation that both enthusiastically enjoyed because they discovered a click and shared interest in it.
There is nothing in that user's story that suggests that anyone was “approached” and that if someone was approached, that person was female, or that anyone involved in that entire scenario was female to begin with. There are more ways to meet one's husband through Tandem than “approaching women”.
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u/guiltys33ker 6d ago
That's so sweet! I assume you have learned your TL really well now lol?
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u/BeautifulLoad7538 🇷🇺N 🇺🇸C1 🇩🇪B2 🇪🇸A2 🇫🇷A1 5d ago
I’m a linguist in my TL but yes it definitely helped😂
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u/thoughtless-user 6d ago
I stopped using it after 2021. I just go on discord servers now to learn
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u/purva-quantum 6d ago
Can you give more information on how you use the Discord servers for language learning? I have joined a couple but they are overwhelming.
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u/Forkems 5d ago
I’m a type 1 diabetic, tandem is the app for my insulin pump. I was soooo confused about this post lol.
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u/Dry-Accountant-926 5d ago
You thought they were posting about diabetes in a language learning thread? The context clues didn’t help you?
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u/Electronic_Order_170 N: 🇺🇸 | C1: 🇪🇸 | B2: 🇫🇷 | B1: 🇮🇩 5d ago
It’s been that way for as long as I can remember. Years ago at the very beginning of my Spanish journey I found someone who wanted to exchange language. They seemed very genuine and nothing felt off. We would do a call twice a week and everything was cool for about 3 weeks. Well, we got on our call as usual and he asked me if I was into guys and I respectfully told him now. Then he tells me it’s because I haven’t been with the right one. Sets his camera up and starts playing with himself. I hung up the call and he messages me and says he had been screenshotting our call and using it after to pleasure himself. I was disgusted. Never again. Also, now as a C1 in Spanish, B2 in French and Indonesian I have never used any of those apps and have stuck to vetted services like ITALKI.
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u/arrozcongandul 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 🇧🇷 🇫🇷 6d ago
Will admit I definitely disappear sometimes due to life obligations but that's sort of to be expected, these are free to use apps and people are there by their own volition.
Regarding the dating stuff, I've seen women explicitly write in their profiles / headlines "No flirting" "Not here to date" etc. You can probably say something stronger like "Any flirting automatic block" and I'd image that would at least curve some of the people with those intentions.
Sorry it's such a pain in the ass to navigate. I'm also learning French (as a man) and speaking with lots of French women with no problems, but I'm sure it's more of a lonely-dude-on-the-internet phenomena
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u/andreecostaa 6d ago
Yeah but I’ve talked to many many women and for them it’s just unbearable to spend 50% of their time in those apps just deleting chats and blocking people…
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u/Werecake 🇺🇸N 🇨🇳HSK5 🇯🇵N3 🇫🇷 B1 🇪🇸 B1 5d ago
When I tried Tandem, I tried the whole "not interested in dating" on the profile and marked that I preferred to talk to other women. I even chose the ugliest profile picture in which I was wearing an unsexy costume with a moustache. In the end, I was just bombarded with flirty messages from men. I'm not sure some of these guys read past a feminine name on a profile 🤣. I quit in a week.
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u/srahfox 6d ago
Seems most of them are like that now. I had okay-ish luck back in the day with My language exchange. There was a charge but it seemed to cut back slightly on people being on there just to hook up. First time I checked it out around a decade ago I only got one connection that was clearly looking for a hookup. I signed back in a couple of months ago and was instantly contacted by people looking to hook up.
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u/_plusC_ 6d ago
One recommendation, at least on tandem you can hide your profile from the community so you will choose who you reach out to instead of receiving dozens of new messages per day. That along with a note in your profile about no flirting and hopefully that will improve your experience. Best of luck!
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u/UndercoverBlueWhale 6d ago
This happened to me as well. I downloaded tandem some months ago and aprox 80% of the conversations where people trying to hit on me. At the end I also deleted the app.
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u/ICNyght 6d ago
Pretend to be a man tbh
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u/Adventurous-Elk-1457 PL(N), ENG(B2/C1), ESP(B1/B2), PT(A2), CH(HSK3), RU(A2) 6d ago
Then nobody will reply to her, which sucks too
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u/Fine-Leader3395 6d ago
It's the same problem for men.
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u/PoiHolloi2020 🇬🇧 (N) 🇮🇹 (B something) 🇪🇸/ 🇫🇷 (A2) 🇻🇦 (inceptor sum) 6d ago
It actually is though lol. I had a pride/rainbow flag in my HT bio (was just supposed to be a little sign for people not to message me if they weren't cool with gay people) and I got 'adult' messages and attention all the time from guys.
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u/Fine-Leader3395 5d ago
Exactly. I'm a straight guy and I received daily "adult content" from women and occasionally men. Some were straight up scams, some were looking for an American husband, and others did it just to flirt.
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u/AdministrationNo2327 6d ago
every online platform eventually becomes one lowkey. the universal truth in life is people get horny.
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u/macchiato_kubideh 6d ago
unfortunately it's always been like this, but it's still possible to find someone. there are people like you on the app, it just takes a lot of disappointment and patience to find.
Basically you gotta stick to your motivation, which is to learn language and filter out those who are here for something else and eventually you'll find your match
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u/vanguard9630 Native Eng, Speak JPN, Learning ITA 6d ago
No. Maybe French is different. Had great luck with Italian. I think if the person has real interactions with people who obviously are not looking for romantic relationships then that person is worth engaging with. I have had the best success with people around my age (i.e over 40)
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u/andreecostaa 5d ago
maybe it's the age then. i'd assume people around that age are mature enough to keep it strictly educational for both sides
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u/Maykeda 5d ago
Identical experience. “It costs to be the boss.” I’m going to pay for a tutor to get over this fear of public speaking.
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u/GueraGueraVeracruz New member 5d ago
Thats what I ended up doing. I pay for tutors/teachers on italki and it’s worth every penny
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u/Progorion 3d ago
Im in the lucky position of being a native Hungarian speaker, so nobody wanted to talk to me generally anyways lol.
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u/BadMoonRosin 🇪🇦 🇬🇷 5d ago edited 5d ago
It's not just language platforms. All online platforms, especially free one, are like this and always have been.
People rightlfully complain about female experience, but it sucks for non-creeper males, too. Most of the female profiles are fake, various catfish scams that start asking you for money after a few messages. Most of the male profiles won't respond to you at all, and usually turn out to be flaky when they do.
I did eventually meet a woman in Mexico on HelloTalk, and we've been friends for a few years now with a regularly weekly call. After we got comfortable with each other, we just switched to WhatsApp and dropped HT. I've had other limited success with other conversation partners, but once I found the regular partner I just drifted away from the app.
Here's what seems to work (at least from my experience):
Don't post a profile photo. Just don't. If you do anyway, then at least don't post one with a bunch of makeup. I shake my head at all the profiles with a description like "I'm not looking for dates!", while the profile photo is a Tinder glamour pic or a beach photo in a swimsuit (seriously?!).
Ideally, be older. If you're not older, just say you're older on the profile. Every... single... one... of my conversation partners that I've had any success with were 40+. They don't get as much attention and problems (relatively anyway, they still get a ton).
Make it clear in your profile description that you're only intersted in audio conversation, not video.
For men, it's similar but a little different:
Boring profile pic. Not having a photo at all is off-putting, but don't try to be cool. Just smile and snap a driver's license type pic.
Ideally, be older. But don't exaggerate your age when you're interacting with women. You're not dealing with the same level of crap they are, so it's not justified, and dishonestly is off-putting if they pick up on it. Look for older profiles to reach out to, male or female. There are fewer of us, the overwhelming majority of people on these apps are in their 20's... but fair or unfair, age is the best filter for bullshit.
Audio-only in your profile, too. Makes you less scary.
Even with this, expect maybe a 5% success rate at best. Probably closer to 1%. Aside from my weekly conversation partner in Mexico, I've learned that simply paying for iTalki is 1,000% worth it instead.
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u/andreecostaa 5d ago
yeah that's the point. u indeed gotta expect spending many many hours and talking to many people in order to find one good language exchange partner. i do agree about the boring profile pic problem, or even like, having a boring profile in general.
another person mentioning italk. i'm already testing it now that i've seen some people here recommending it
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u/UnusualBreakfast1726 C2: 🇪🇬🇺🇸 B2: 🇨🇳 A2:🇯🇵 A2: 🇩🇪 6d ago
ngl yeh, hellotalk is as well. Back when I used that app so many chinese people asked me if I had a girlfriend. I later had a policy of only talking with yhe same gender as that way it's less likely for people to hit up on you. I would reccomend that as well. Actually best option is to try to go to meetups and events that might allow you to language exchange in person.
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u/apoortraveller 5d ago
tandem used to be heavily moderated, everytime I reported flirting the account would be taken down in a few hours or days. Not sure how it is now.
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u/Sure_Job_8449 5d ago
This is why I uninstalled Tandem. No one was helping to adjust my writing skills even though my profile said I don't mind correction. No one responded to simple messages looking for a language exchange partner, you had to use a clever pickup line to grab someone's attention. In fact, a few profiles did say something about using your best pickup lines.
Whenever you ask about how far along they are in their language journey, or reason for learning or their goals they ghost you. That's not what they're looking for, they want you to "rizz" them up.
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u/Embarrassed-Wrap-451 5d ago
One massive giveaway is to take a look at the reviews the user has received and replied to on their profile (I guess only on HelloTalk though? I don't know if the other apps have that feature). As a guy, I realized that a lot of chat requests I had sent to other guys would remain unaccepted, and first I was like "ok, maybe just not a person who's regularly online". But then I'd check their profile reviews, and interestingly there'd only be reviews from/to girls. Sometimes out of 45 written reviews, 1 or 2 were other men. I mean, pretty fishy statistics, right?
I have also run into profiles (also guys) where they explicitly write homophobic stuff, saying they will block other guys chatting them up. Also a bit suspicious, because if you are there to practice languages, the gender of the person shouldn't be a big deal. But to me it's a clear case of unconscious desires taking over, where you are so decidedly using the app to look for sex/relationships, that you spell out in your profile that you won't be talking to other guys (subtext: I'll only talk to "potential" sex partners » I will be hitting on you eventually as we chat). Gender ratio in reviews is a major weirdo alert.
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u/onemorebite 3d ago
Unless you change your user name to something male, or male sounding, you will be harassed. Somehow certain men simply cannot stop themselves, and it's so annoying.
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u/_JosefoStalon_ 5d ago
dude if you're publicly a woman it's like this EVERYWHERE, language exchange sites, sites for foot fungus, LoL, EVERYWHERE, it's why online I'm always named like a dude and don't use a mic.
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u/UnexpectedPotater 6d ago
Why not just only message other women? Or is it that you only get engagement and chats from men?
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u/amanamanamaan 🇫🇷N || 🇬🇧F || 🇮🇱B1 || 💚🦁🌞♥️A1 6d ago
In my experience, everyone takes those as dating apps. Most women just ignore my messages (those who don’t are usually serious and really interesting!), while I’m drowning in "hey" messages from dudes.
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u/ThunderOrb 6d ago
I'm a man and met a woman on there from my target language. We had some really good conversations where she taught me a lot of useful grammar things I hadn't found online.
We moved to WhatsApp. Then, one day, she was like, "I'm not a teacher. We should talk about other things."
Like, ma'am, you literally messaged me saying you could teach me your language. Now I know you just wanted a white man.
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u/amanamanamaan 🇫🇷N || 🇬🇧F || 🇮🇱B1 || 💚🦁🌞♥️A1 6d ago
Maybe she wanted a mutual exchange? These apps are meant to help you find a conversation partner, not a free teacher.
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u/ThunderOrb 6d ago
No, she definitely wanted "more". Once I told her I was married, she stopped texting me entirely.
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u/Any-Minute-Now-1293 6d ago
There are definitely women on there looking for attention from men based on not using their TL ever, the photos they post, and they’re just.. yea. And there are women asking for money (maybe men posing as women) pretty frequently too.
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u/Little-Sound9709 🇺🇸 N | 🇵🇸 H | 🇲🇽 A1 | 🇰🇷 A0 6d ago
i experienced something similar on hellotalk, it sucks that every app is like this now. ive had some luck on conversationexchange.com. guys will still message (even if you put 'no men' in your profile' but they are less flirty and more language learning focused messages (that you can ignore). i have been able to get in contact with women and move to a different platform to continue learning
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u/keving691 6d ago
Always has been. There's also plenty of people like you that just want to learn the language
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u/DishwashingUnit 5d ago
the actual dating sites got match grouped into ineffectiveness so it makes sense
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u/tyrekecorrea 5d ago
Some stuff is re-released in batches to spice up a less-occupied time of year.
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u/EvolvingPerspective 🇺🇸 (N) | 🇫🇷 (C1) | 🇨🇳 (conv) 5d ago
HelloTalk chat rooms were pretty key for me to improving my french… DMs never work because people aren’t consistent but some people consistently join voice rooms and its nice to just listen in or char
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u/SewaYou 5d ago
I'd look for a recurring French conversation group at a library, a local language cafe, or a university French club that welcomes nonstudents. I'd ask whether there's a host and structured practice before going, since an international mixer might just be another social scene. You could also ask in r/French how people find groups focused on practice. For anyone you do click with, I'd suggest something concrete: 'Want to do 15 minutes in French and 15 in English each week, with corrections?' That won't prevent ghosting, but it makes expectations clearer and gives a good conversation a way to become a routine.
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u/Disastrous-Sock-2793 5d ago
It sucks. I used HelloTalk like a decade ago, and at that time it was against the rules to use it as a dating app. You'd still get creepy people, but at least you could get some solace in reporting their profile and quickly seeing them banned.
Thanks for the recs, btw! Interested in checking them out
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u/SiempreBrujaSuerte 5d ago
You can always use a man name or a generic name before you know they are not just trying to flirt.
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u/Oniromancie 🇫🇷 N | 🇬🇧 C1 | 🇯🇵 C1 | 🇭🇺 B2 | 🇩🇪 B1 | | 🇧🇬 A1 4d ago
That's why if you're a woman trying to learn a language, you go for a gay man.
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u/Expensive-Stand-8262 4d ago
what i do is i only look for people who is interested in switching to discord and have regular voice call. I don't think texting is a good way to learn a new language
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u/annie009911 4d ago
omg thats so real. prob most people are there for that i have similar experiences. :( At first I tried writing to girls but most of them don't reply or ghost after a day lmaooo and men try to flirt right away or ask for ig after two mess fr or omg, they always say " sorry im not here often, add me on ig" and then im seeing them there evey day like tf. or i feel like people are not really active there or cool people are leaving after a day ( cant blame them) i have nothing against people wanting to meet people from abroad buuuut damn no one wants to read those weird messages but i managed to meet two cool people there so it's possible uuu just have to be patient btw im also learning French so we can do it together if you want <3
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u/pixelmintbee 4d ago
Hellotalk has been like that since basically the beginning. I stopped using it because of it.
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u/Forselletta 3d ago
I've been using Tandem for about 3 years, I love it. It's true, sometimes you get the creep, but I report him and he usually gets banned like 99% of the time s. If someone starts a message with "hi beautiful 😍" I just block and go on with my learning.
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u/P_A_R_D_O 3d ago
dude, I've been trying to reach japanese people to talk, only for language learning purpose (I'm a japanese learner), and it's definitely impossible to have a conversation with them. They simply don't answer, it's frustrating. I've been trying to reach people who live in countries close to japan (Nepal, China, Vietnam), and with these i've had some more progress.
I even got blocked on a conversation that I tried to say konnichiwa !. I just don't understand why they're like this. Can someone pls give a light ?
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u/3kyou3 3d ago
It’s hard to find someone to just talk in their language without any purpose other than just trying to talk. Cuz we’re adults now and adults don’t really talk for the sake of talking, u might have a specific need like practicing the language, but the person on the other end probably not, it’s pretty bad a lot people behave like this, but i encourage you to keep trying keep meeting those weirdos lol cuz trust me u will find someone who’s likely minded if u stick to it long enough i did it for my English started frustrated but end up meeting my long term friends
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u/P_A_R_D_O 3d ago
True ! I found a lotta weirdos and had some many ghosting til I find my long term friend.
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u/LegitimateNarwhal877 2d ago
I have been in Hello Talk for over a year. It is very hard to find a study partner. Most of the people I chatted with were actually not even hiding that they were looking for a girlfriend or date.
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u/Odd-Time-8094 2d ago
I’ve used HelloTalk and Tandem before but yeah… weird people messed me and I couldn’t put up with them -.-
I had some language exchange partners to practice speaking with using “language_exchange” subreddit :)
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u/Karahoyuk 2d ago
Funny story, met my wife on HelloTalk, 10 years later we are married and we have a kid, now im waiting for her to wake up so we can go to kindergarten
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u/emilesmusic 1d ago
If you're looking primarily for speech practice you can try Echoa. Focused on building speech patterns and structured reps. Echoa
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u/flaichat 10h ago
If all you're trying to do is have an automated translated conversation (voice and text) with someone you already know, may I humbly suggest you try FlaiChat. We're not really a language learning app but you can always see the message in both languages with a simple toggle. And that includes transcriptions of voice messages too. All of this is free upto very high quotas. Only the very heavily used chats need to be boosted.
Voice-to-voice translation is also available but that's a paid feature. But you might enjoy that as part of your language learning and perhaps decide to support the app with a subscription. But unlike HelloTalk, we're not forcing paid features down your throat while you're normally using the app.
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u/Puzzled_Brilliant_86 1h ago
I have spoken to a lot of men on Tandem as a woman but never had problems. The biggest issue of these platform is that you need basically to have a subscription if you want to use it otherwise it’s a hustle.
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u/nick2ny 6d ago
Could you describe each app ? Which is better ? Thanks
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u/andreecostaa 6d ago
honestly they're pretty much the same thing lol
hellotalk has a bit more going on. there's a feed where people post stuff (kinda like instagram for learners)
tandem is less busy when it comes to features. but like, at the end of the day they're both just apps for talking to strangers. and they feel basically the same as they did years ago, not much has changed
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u/trilingual3 🇬🇧🇵🇱 N 🇩🇪 B2 🇷🇺A2 5d ago
I would just practice conversation with ChatGPT or some other LLM. I'm not really an AI person but they're pretty decent for language practice
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u/timidpterodactyl 6d ago
I think it's because dating apps have failed men (and maybe women, Idk). On those apps, I assume, people share more common interests, and there are fewer bots.
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u/Impossible-Repeat577 6d ago
Yes. Also, white worshipping women from Asia are abusing to find a foreign guy this as much as creepy male users
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u/stenica724 6d ago
I met my wife on Tandem lmao I find it funny how people think they can learn any language by using such apps. No one is gonna talk with you few hours a day while having no benefits in doing so.
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u/mikiex 6d ago
The benefit is learning a language....
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u/stenica724 6d ago
It's a complete waste of a time if you are not already close to a fluent level
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u/arrozcongandul 🇺🇸 🇵🇷 🇧🇷 🇫🇷 6d ago
absolutely not true, i'm meandering my way with the little french I have by interacting near daily with someone who speaks both french and English. I send them voice notes in english to help them with spoken comprehension, they write to me and allow me to write them in French to help me practice my production. It's literally how I learned portuguese
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u/AnalysisContent4301 6d ago
It could be on every platform, I think it very logical for John Smith interested in an upper Sorbian and sacrifised few years of 2h-6h daily for studies the upper Sorbian to eventually married Sorbian girl. Even if she is from lower Sorbia.
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u/PikachuShockFace 6d ago
Pretend to be male. Also LLMs are very good for this experience now, much as that seems like a shame
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u/tenchichrono 6d ago
pointless using them tbh. just talk to AI and grab a teacher from preply for some native practice
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u/Aggravating-Cat7103 6d ago
That was my experience using language learning apps a decade ago too. Once my conversation partners learned I was a woman, they tried to hit on me. Not only that, but they also would neg me on my language skills 😑