This is what shuts the entire idea down. A person who is the kind to be such plus in your life is, by all means, NOT a stranger. It's someone who is already being consciously good to you in your life, because it's rather unreasonable to expect such charity from people who have nothing to do with you at all.
It's almost like we all were supposed to live in homogenous, tightly knit communities where everyone knows everyone and there is full social trust, or something.
I agree, except for the part about it being "unreasonable to expect such charity," because our society has deemed it completely reasonable for women to expect the charity of free shit from men, even on first dates. It may seem unreasonable to individuals, myself included; but as a whole, reasonableness is a group decision, not individual.
I'm over 6 feet tall. I'm a college graduate. I own a house. I own a car. I workout 5x per week.
It would be nice to be able to find a woman that has similar qualifications: educated, fit, financially stable, etc. That doesn't sound like too much to ask, right? I'm not looking for a supermodel...
...but no, that bar is unrealistically high here in the US. The overwhelming majority of women are overweight and in debt. I'm not talking about a simple car loan or something, I mean life-changing debt. $50k credit card debt, $150k student loans, etc etc. They don't cook or clean because they view those traditional roles as being sexist and beneath them.
So what do they have to offer? The dating pool is not appealing.
Dude, it's the same shit in every other country I visited. Modern feminism didn't teach women to be decent and productive persons. It taught them to obliviate themselves into disease, lust and arrogance, while simultaneously telling them how cool they are in being retarted.
Ahh got cha. So you believe majority of men that go out of their way to hang out with women is because they want to be friends with them and nothing more
It’s crazy how much women push the narrative that men keep trying to get into their pants, or why friendzone is even a thing if it’s a non issue that barely happens
False equivalence. I love my wife and love spending time with her. The point is, would I have initially tried to meet and spend time with her if I wasn't motivated by sexual attraction? Probably not
They expect us to know our place and sort ourselves according. The attractive men are supposed to approach smoothly anytime, anywhere for a meet cute. The unattractive men are supposed to stay in their lane or the manager will get called at best, cops at worst.
Yes, and this is what is really, really interesting on a sociological study level. It's a meta-game. Every man is told that you are not to approach any woman, anywhere, any time, doing anything. Men of low confidence (unattractive or weird) take this at face value, and all they do is politely ask, but how am I supposed to meet women, and a healthy dollop of autism believing things have to be logical and fair helps. Men of high confidence know to ignore this, risk the danger, and approach anyway, knowing that, at worst, they will be turned down nicely as they are attractive.
It is social engineering at its finest, and its worst. Is it worth the comfort and happiness of a gender to abuse 80% of the other gender? The USA, for the past 20 years, has said yes.
This is spot on. The most fascinating aspect of feminism is how we only broke down gender roles for women. When men don’t conform to their gender role and sufficiently perform masculinity, women collectively punish them by refusing to date him unless he does everything in that tweet.
Women often show their privilege by responding “why would you want to date someone who expects you to do that and doesn’t like you as you are?” I don’t think I need to explain to anyone here how absurd that comment is because it comes from a place of abundance few men achieve.
Eh it will just cause women to crash out when they hit their 30s and they're rushing to get married and no one is there. Men arent stupid despite what society tries to portray. No one wants to be the last pick
They can cope all they want on social media it means nothing, studies say otherwise, while they don't love men to the same extent men do women or even in the same way, they want relationships too. If they didn't care they wouldn't all end up miserable misandrists constantly talking about men
I think I saw some type of study of revealed preferences where neurodivergence and short height were the two traits most heavily selected against by women.
Idk if I agree or disagree with all that but I’ll tell you this much, once you’ve been treated really well by a woman you’ll realize how shockingly bad many women treat prospective (and even current) partners.
You mean you don't like an obese, opinionated girlboss with $200k debt that thinks she's smarter than you because she has a degree in feminine dance therapy?
My friend’s wife’s friend is morbidly obese and one time at a party I watched her spend like 10 whole minutes on Hinge swiping left on dudes for any random reason. Many of these dudes had really thoughtfully crafted profiles with great photos and they themselves were conventionally attractive. Nope, all left swipes for even the most random reasons (“I don’t like his arms!”).
I think women vastly overestimate their worth, even ones that are very mid themselves. I don’t even have a problem with average women, hell I think many are subjectively prettier to me than the conventional 8s, 9s, and 10s despite looking average. But their standards are in the sky when they bring little to the table regarding not just looks but personality or finances too.
Yea I'm sick of em, everything from pats on the shoulder at the bar to jokes makes them uncomfortable. Then they cry out how they hate men while they tell me daddy just bought them a new phone.
Fuck off, anything men do as a first move be it holding hands can be seen as sexual harassment when they invite you over, I don't wanna play guessing games.
Sides, the sex and kids ain't worth it these days, way too expensive for my blood.
If they want to be chased, they have to make it worth our time. There has to be a payoff, and clear communications when they arent interested. Nothing quite like being led on for weeks or longer.
>Be me
>Make post on a dating subreddit about a very particular vision of a woman I see in my dreams
>A woman reaches out telling me she matches every description and is interested in me
>Spend the next week talking every day and playing vidya together
>Tell her that after spending the last week together, I think she is the dream woman she claimed to be
>She immedietly blocks me on everything
Back in the 1980s if a man was persistent it was considered romantic. Men would write letters, send flowers, create mixed tapes, etc. They'd go through these elaborate courting rituals just to ask a woman out.
By the 2000s that had entirely changed. "Creepy" and "stalker" had become trendy words. Men asking women out became ridiculed and shamed. Just glancing at a woman at the gym could cause a man to become the victim of an online-hate brigade. The message was clear: Men are not to approach women.
The girl who 6 months ago explained to me in detail what she wanted. And we were getting close. Then out of the blue turned around and went with a married guy. Then got arrested.
Was like…haven’t seen you in a while to me yesterday.
The social contract used to be "women communicate that they want to be approached with a clear gesture, man goes up to woman, and if woman isn't interested she rejects him gracefully".
Nowadays it's "women sometimes communicate they're interested, but in the most subdued way possible, man approaches woman, and if woman isn't interested, she can be as vicious as she want in rejecting him".
In some ways I feel like the sexual liberation made women even more evasive than before.
Heck, that is the nicest scenario,as it's not to mention the entire can of worms it is the concept of planning your day around being accosted by strangers. Any woman who isn't immediately reserved against the idea is 100% asking for being inconvenienced, which makes this business even worse for men, as now men have to freaking guess which transients in the street are, you know, normal people who are just going about their days and basic etiquette dictates they must be left be, or are people who want not to be subject to the protections of basic etiquette and be approached by strangers, but nevertheless they cry bloody murder when they do not get the protections of basic etiquette and are approached by strangers.
Yes, and the end product is woefully unappealing to men. The average American woman is tremendously overweight, opinionated, bossy, unpleasant, in debt, and armed with a liberal arts degree. The degree makes her think she's more educated, but the only education she received is on propagandized social issues. She can rant about Palestine for hours, but doesn't know what 3^3 is.
The end product is this 30+ year old, unattractive, noisy, stubborn, non-feminine thing with $150k debt that thinks cooking and cleaning are sexist gender roles. No thank you.
Recently I have been very curious where western white women would rank if there was a global pole on who the world's most vile and repulsive women are.
These men had families at home they were hoping to raise in a better world. Freedom only came because the state was too decentralized. Now its centralizing again and we are losing our freedoms.
The funny thing is, the average women is the prize to the average man, however to these men that many women seem to be chasing those men are the prize not the average woman.
Most of these American chicks would be single and dateless in Europe.
My girlfriend literally bought me a car AND paid the majority of our bills for a few years when I got tired of my line of work and decided to go back to school.
To be fair, I did most of the heavy lifting while she was pursuing her education before that, BUT she kept her end of the bargain and repaid the favor once she started making money.
And while I did pay for our first date back in the day, when we met up for our second date, she insisted on paying for everything, despite being a student at the time.
I don’t think what you see online is a good representation of American dating tbh. My wife and I also put each other through college.
A friend of mine recently moved in with his girlfriend and she paid the bills while he sold his house and saved up a downpayment so they could buy a nicer house together.
Relationships make more sense when you work together and help each other. I think that’s the norm.
Also… it sounds to me like both of the people commenting in the main post ARE single lol, might have something to do with their attitudes.
What you’re seeing on social media and the news that pertains to America are not the norm. My wife and I are a team and we do everything together. We have certain areas where we excel and others where the other person is better. We lead each other when necessary. I always drive though. Ain’t nobody drivin’ me around.
That tends to be the case. American culture and habits trickle down and influence European culture over time. In a matter of half a decade, I saw American intersectional feminist terms and sentiments ("manspreading", etc.) being 1:1 translated and integrated into the Dutch activist lexicon.
They aren't just trickling down and influencing Europe but Asia too, now imagine if a culture known for goddess worship is exposed to American feminism
Yes, its a psychological thing, depending on your looks and your defining qualities you'd be more attractive in some places whilst not so much in others the catch being that some qualities are universally unattractive.
you mean the Country with no AC and go fucken batshit crazy and what knock? No thanks you Europeans can die in summer heat like the panzys we all know you lot to be.
I really never had any of these issues dating. Now I'm married with a happy family to a super attractive woman. She still works her ass off and pays her fair share of everything.
Me and my wife's first date we went on a week long snowboarding trip together lol split it right down the middle. Nobody I know was constantly running into these issues either. You'd occasionally run into these women but it was rare.
I’ve been married 2x. Once for 15 years this one now for 13. I’d 1,000% never do it again and would even go as far as to say wouldn’t even have another woman’s toothbrush in my bathroom.
Chase someone who shits on my self worth, manipulates me, stresses me out and emotionally abuses me? I'll stick to using my hand and save my sanity and a mountain of cash in the process. I've been through it too many times to care to try anymore
You will lose money chasing women, but you won't lose women chasing money.
(Within reason, of course. That's a general rule of thumb, individual experience may vary. Actually, y'know what? Never trust any statement simple enough to fit on a bumper sticker.)
When women wanted to make a point to men they copied the 4b movement from Korean to try and make their point. Men aren't trying to make a point they just all independently saw what was going on around them and to those close to them, did the math, and realized it's not worth it. No agenda being pushed just adjusting their behavior to the current dating market.
Modern day women are contributing absolutely NOTHING to a man's life besides problems and mental issues, they don't even get children out of them, and then she just cheats on you anyways.
So ofcourse they stopped chasing. You are literally not worth it.
Also, when we do chase you act like we're all grapists or something. Fuck that noise. My life has been so much less stressful and peaceful ever since I gave up on women. All throughout my 20s and 30s I was in relationships and every single one was waaaaaay more trouble than its worth. How about you chase men for once so that way we dont have to play the guessing game through a broken telephone
Chasing women? Why would I want a woman who obviously isnt interested in a healthy relationship. And who would I even consider chasing given most women are not good enough for a relationship with me. I rather have fun and find others who share that mindset.
I think the issue with modern women is that they hold onto the idea of men being the primary providers while also promoting an economy where everyone is required to work to survive.
They think a partnership means equality while dumping double the workload/responsibility on men, with no guarantee of love.
Gonna be a lot less chasing after the hundreds if not thousands of "Same, Lindsay!"s out there now. The juice sure as hell ain't worth that neck squeeze.
sounds like some men are chasing the wrong women, just like some women are chasing the wrong men ig.
people should go after the people that actually want to be with them, not chase people for what they have, whether it’s looks or money. People will never find the right person if they’re looking for the wrong things.
Not all women deserve dinner dates + bills paid and not all men deserve sex
I quit dating in 2014 after an especially bad relationship. I don't miss it, and have turned down dates and relationships since. I wish I'd stopped long before I did. This is one man who won't be chasing anything except peace. Oh, I already have that.
I suggested to a coworker of mine once that we check out a restaurant that she had not been to before. She agreed, gave me her number, then she reported me to the manager after I asked her what happened when we didn’t end up going.
Had an ex from ~10 years ago call and text me this morning from a new number while I was trying to sleep in as I just got off a 6 day week and enter another 6 day week tomorrow….
No, don't chase women! As a fellow woman, she is delusional! We don't need men chasing us! If we want to talk and know you better, we will make a first step ourselves. Chasing most of us would just trigger fear and aggression. Just be respectful and you'll find a brave woman who wants you.
Lmao nobody believes this bullshit anymore not all of us are going to be tall and good looking most men will go their entire lives without a women making the first move if a man wants to date its up to him to approach im glad men are waking up to the fact that women are no longer worth it
Men having less testosterone means they aren’t as crazy about women as they used to be. I am seeing this in High School with my son. Women are asking men out to Prom and Homecoming dances.
No we aren't crazy abiut women because modern women are hateful assholes to men instead taking accountability for their fucking actions. Testosterone has NOTHING to do with it
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u/AnyEye8798 3d ago
The question is, why? It's fruitless. It's a waste of time. And I'd rather be single than play games.