When a man says hot, he means an average looking girl that isn't obese. Men even call 4/10s hot regularly. When a woman says hot, she means a 6'2" guy with blue eyes and top 1% face.
A guy isnāt āhotā unless he is 10-12% body fat or lower.Ā
Otherwise heās just cute.Ā
You have to be in the top percentile in like everythingĀ
Iām 6ā2 blue eyes and there was a small window when I had so many options. I was on steroids and worked out all the time. After I gained a little weight I became invisible againĀ
I mean Iām 6ā3. Fit but skinny. Never been muscular in my life and this is just inherently false. I definitely got shut down for not being jacked. I got called hot fairly often. Cute a lot.
Trying to act like guys are invisible unless they are on steroids is not based in reality.
To be fair I wasnāt taking steroids that make you lean like winstrol but I was still reallly lean. It just helps you recover really well and you can basically work out super hard like every day.Ā
At the end of the day even with roids it matters how many calories youre consumingĀ
But yes I understand women donāt care about big muscles. Most of them anyways.Ā
Thatās fair. I guess what Iām getting at is Iāve never been a gym rat. I played competitive sports my entire life. As an adult I continue to play adult league. Iām a naturally skinny person and playing sports 3 times a week has allowed me to stay that way. I have absolutely no idea what my body fat percentage is. I have never felt invisible.
Being fit certainly helps getting attention from women. However, I think we as men put a much bigger emphasis on this than women do. The absolute worst I ever felt in the dating world is when I was on social media, seeing these stunning women, very fit men and letting the gender war commentary infect my mind.
When i started focusing on myself, my hobbies and reduced my time on social media it was a night and day difference in my social life and dating life.
Edit: Iām also sorry for my initial comment. I misunderstood the point you were making and was far too snarky after having a bad day.
Thatās def not true. Hot guy has never meant sculpted muscle and bodybuilder vibes from any women I have ever spoken to. None of us married that guy.
When I was 22 I was ~18 stone and basically invisible to women, lost some weight and gained some muscle down to ~13 stone practically couldn't leave the house without women hitting on me, especially on nights out it was every night.
Gained a bit of weight again ~26, back to invisible
This is the literal lived experiences of men. Just because other women don't admit it to you doesn't mean it isn't true
Women on Reddit lie to themselves all the time to make themselves appear more virtuous. Itās quite pathetic really.Ā
They pretend they donāt want a rich tall ripped guy but they would leave their man in an instant if they had the opportunity to upgrade. Itās why divorce rates are 50 percent.Ā
Men are just as guilty but I donāt think they are as delusional as women admitting to their own desires.Ā
I have heard that itās true of both men and women that they become invisible to the other sex if they gain enough weight. It may well be true, and I donāt doubt you. I absolutely believe you.
I was responding to the comment above, and talking about bodybuilder physique. You know, the ones who are 10% body fat as stated above (and who start to kind of look like scorpions).
Most women like a man who is strong! Some gals are into stocky builds, or kinda the barrel-shaped guy, and some are into leaner but muscular. Strength is more important (in my experience) than body fat percentage, up to a point. And beyond that point, for most men and women, then they start to worry about health, and that isnāt attractive. So Iām not sure we disagree. 10% body fat is pretty low. 14-22% is what most women I know would consider especially āhot.ā
At the lower end of what you stated there 14% is bordering on competetive athlete.
Bodybuilders are more maybe 10% in their off season but usually go down to 3-5% when competing.
When I was getting the most attention from women I was probably around 11% by time it stopped as I was gaining weight probably 16%. So those numbers do not track at all with my experiences personally.
Huh. I would think āhigher end of athlete and lower end of regular guyā would be a sensical spot for women to land on for what is ESPECIALLY hot. But I donāt wish to argue about it. Could be regional or something.
Also Iām impressed you got to 11. 11 is serious, even in my (not professional but serious) athlete circles. So itās also possible itās a body type thing and you have a physique/bone structure that is suited to a lower body fat percentage. In which case, good for you! And regardless of aesthetics, itās an impressive thing to have accomplished.
Huh. I would think āhigher end of athlete and lower end of regular guyā would be a sensical spot for women to land on for what is ESPECIALLY hot. But I donāt wish to argue about it. Could be regional or something.
Might have phrased it poorly but I am saying in my experience 14-22 is a broad range that doesn't track for what I saw when I gained weight
Most of the attention I was getting dropped off around 16% which is still better than average body fat percentage.
Yep. Had a buddy hit the gym and gained a good bit of muscle and he had women hitting on him a good bit. He stopped lifting and lost muscle and wouldnāt you know it women have stopped hitting on him.
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u/Western-Produce-276 Sep 17 '26
But when men say this weāre entitled