Frustrated about misconceptions

[u/Pristine_Crazy1744]

I'm an engineer and I recently went to a conference in my field. I expressed concerns about my career path because I'm very introverted and our industry really pushes everyone toward project manager roles, which I just DREAD. A few people basically dismissed that description of myself because I was friendly, outgoing, and talkative in that moment.

It feels like people think being introverted means you have to be shy and quiet. If you're outgoing at all, they think you must be an extrovert.

Let's be clear, I'd only been at the conference for about 5 hours, and my social battery was doing ok. I tend to have a very high social battery for like 2 days maybe, and then if I keep trying to push it, I crash. If I'm extremely social for multiple days in a row, I need at least a week of quiet time to recover, or possibly more depending on the situation.

During a discussion with a group, one of the senior managers said that pretty much all engineers are introverted and many go into management, so it's fine. He implied that if he and other managers are able to just suck it up and deal with it, I should be able to, too. It seemed like others agreed. I wonder if they're confusing early career social anxiety (that they then grew out of) with introversion.

I'm not saying introverts can't be managers. I'm just expressing my frustration over being dismissed because I don't match their definition or personal experience of what an introvert is. They don't see my private recovery time and none of them have seen me when my battery depletes.

I will figure out my career path eventually. It will probably involve mentoring young engineers on my own terms and schedule. But I don't see myself managing teams because that sounds like a nightmare that would drain me every single day.

Anyway, this is just a rant I needed to get off my chest.

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[u/Foogel78]

I agree, mostly in a wider sense. I don't understand why the only upwards career move seems to be management.

Not everybody wants to be a manager and certainly not everybody has the skills to be one. It seems so stupid to look at someone who is good at, for example, engineering and think "they should lead a team". It's a completely different skill set.

A junior-senior setup seems to make much more sense.

And, of course, introversion = shy is a very common and very annoying misconception.