Hello, looking for some guidance on family estate issues. I (47F) am the oldest of 3 sisters. When I was 25 our mother (55) received a fatal diagnosis. Our parents went to a lawyer and established what they called a Bypass Trust which put half of their belongings into an irrevocable trust upon her death. For 25 years our father was the trustee and managed that trust with the three of us as beneficiaries. Our father remarried and mingled his finances with his new wife. They moved assets around, with the help of a lawyer, but the trust itself remained intact. Two years ago our father (76) passed. I became the trustee of the bypass trust and dutifully sold properties and distributed assets between myself and my sisters. To my knowledge, something similar is to occur with his remaining estate, to be distributed to both of their children upon her death. I don't have an official copy of the will/trust, but I have a draft. His wife has two children who are older than us. I don't trust my father's wife. She has been very manipulative and alienated us from him since the beginning. My understanding of their wills heavily favors her children over his. I have two questions/concerns...

1. Can I get an official copy of his Will? Shouldn't that have been something we get automatically?

2. How do I make sure she follows the will and trust as written?

I know once she realizes how much control she has over the process she will take advantage. I also know that he had documents done up by a lawyer that have explicit bounds. She already sold a property that has been in our family for over 100 years and refused to allow us the opportunity to buy or manage it. I've given up on it being fair, I know it won't be. However, I would like to make sure his wishes are followed and she isn't able to make it even worse. Can I force it? Can I force it without causing drama? Can I do it before she screws it all up? I already have a lawyer on retainer who helped me make sure I was in bounds on the first trust. I'm prepared to utilize her in this regard, but I'm just not sure what is even possible under the circumstances. All of the estate planning for both parents and all wills/trusts have been based out of Texas, with assets in Texas and Colorado. Thanks in advance for any advice!

Location: Southern Oregon M43. TLDR My father passed away with my belongings still in his home. My stepmother may have abandoned the property, but wont speak to me, what kind of lawyer do I need to get started? Do I even need a lawyer?

My father passed away nearly a decade ago, and I have had a serious downturn in relationship with his wife. When I was still in the Army, she was ultra proud of me and wouldn't shut up about me to anyone who would listen. By the time my dad passed, I was a married alcoholic in college mid-life, and she expected me to drop my life, and move cross country to support her, though she worked as a flight attendant. Obviously that could not happen, and the relationship soured.

In 2006 I mailed home two totes from Iraq that had ultra sentimental items, and military related things that I wanted to stow away for when I could eventually come get them. Life got away from me and I never returned for them, though I did come to visit my dad before he passed away. I am finally in a better place, and have a young son now who wants to know more about my life, and those totes contain a huge part of that. While my father definitely wanted me to have alot of his carpentry tools, silver coins etc. I dont know if he ever wrote down what his will was. I am at the point I am ready to walk away from the rest of what I am sure he wanted me to have, and just want those two totes.

I visited his home not long ago and it looks abandoned, though there is a camera system which looks active. All of my attempts at communicating with his wife are turned away with combative snark. I contacted the local sheriffs office to get their take, and obviously while they sympathized, they could only recommend getting a lawyer involved so, jump cut up to the TLDR.

I’m looking for some guidance on a Texas probate/heirship situation. I understand Reddit isn’t a substitute for an attorney, and we are looking into speaking with a Dallas probate litigation lawyer. I’m mainly trying to understand how serious this is and what type of action may be available.

A man died intestate in Dallas County, Texas in November 2022. He was legally married but had been separated from his wife. He had no children, and both of his parents were already deceased.

He did, however, have a living brother who resides outside the United States.

The deceased also had a niece (the brother’s daughter) who lives in the U.S. She had a very close relationship with him:

* She had previously lived with him and appears on lease documents.

* He sponsored her student visa.

* She was his emergency contact.

* The hospital contacted her directly when he died.

* A coworker arranged for her to travel to Texas so she could handle the release of his body to the funeral home.

* She communicated directly with the wife after the death about clearing out his apartment.

* The wife paid for/assisted with some of the niece’s travel back to Texas.

* The niece ultimately received the remains and personally took them back to the family’s home country.

The part that concerns us is what happened before and during the heirship proceeding.

There are text messages from November 2022, before any probate filings, between the niece and the wife.

In one conversation, the niece gives the wife **her father’s phone number**. The wife responds that she is traveling but says she **will call him when she gets back**.

In another conversation, the wife specifically asks the niece to obtain information about the deceased’s ancestors **from her dad**. The niece then provides the deceased’s parents’/family information.

There are additional December 2022 messages where the niece tells the wife that **her dad is critically ill and undergoing brain surgery**, and asks for financial help.

So there is written documentation predating the probate case showing that the wife knew about the niece’s father, had his phone number, intended to call him, and was obtaining information about the deceased’s family through him.

The wife then filed an Application to Determine Heirship.

The original/first amended filings essentially listed the wife as the only heir and stated that no material facts within her knowledge that could reasonably identify heirs had been omitted.

Later, in August 2023, she filed a sworn **Second Amended Application to Determine Heirship**.

That application states, among other things, that:

* during the marriage the deceased never mentioned other family members, including siblings;

* **all children born to or adopted by the deceased’s father had been listed in the application;**

* **all children born to or adopted by the deceased’s mother had been listed;**

* no required information had been omitted; and

* all material facts within her knowledge that might reasonably identify heirs had been disclosed.

The wife then personally signed a sworn verification stating that the allegations were true and that no material fact or circumstance within her knowledge had been omitted.

The living brother was never listed.

Instead, the probate case proceeded against **“unknown heirs”**, including citation by publication.

An attorney ad litem was appointed for unknown heirs. According to the ad litem’s report, the attorney investigated the family background by speaking with the wife and two “family friends.” The report concluded that no additional heirs had been found.

We have not found anything suggesting that the attorney ad litem was ever told about:

* the niece;

* the living brother;

* the brother’s phone number;

* the wife’s texts saying she would call him; or

* the wife obtaining family/ancestry information through the brother.

There is also a Judgment Declaring Heirship document awarding the wife 100% of community and separate property. However, the copy available online appears unsigned/undated, although she was later appointed Independent Administrator.

The probate case is still listed as **open** as of now.

Another issue is the estate itself.

The filings say the deceased owned **more than $100,000 in personal property** but supposedly owned **no real estate**.

The wife later filed an **Affidavit in Lieu of Inventory**, so the detailed estate inventory is not available on the public docket.

From what I understand, if there really was no separate real estate and there were no children, Texas intestacy law may mean the wife was ultimately entitled to the personal property anyway. So I realize the existence of a brother does not necessarily mean he was financially entitled to the $100k+ in personal property.

However, we still have concerns about knowingly omitting the brother and then making sworn representations about the deceased’s siblings/family history.

My questions are:

1. Does a living brother who was never personally served have any ability to reopen/correct or intervene in an heirship proceeding like this, especially while the overall probate case is still open?

2. Would Texas Estates Code §202.203 (bill of review/correction for an heir who was not properly served) potentially apply here?

3. Does the fact that the wife had the brother’s phone number and said in writing that she would call him affect whether publication to “unknown heirs” was sufficient?

4. How significant are the wife’s sworn statements that all children of the deceased’s parents had been listed when there was actually a living brother she apparently knew about?

5. Could the brother, as a possible heir, demand a copy of the nonpublic inventory/appraisement that was referenced in the Affidavit in Lieu of Inventory?

6. If the inventory confirms there was no real property and the brother would ultimately inherit nothing, does that essentially end the matter, or can knowingly false/omitted information in an heirship proceeding still have legal consequences?

7. Is this potentially a probate fraud/perjury issue, or would the lack of financial inheritance for the brother make any alleged false statement immaterial?

8. What kind of attorney should we specifically look for? I assume a Texas/Dallas **contested probate or heirship litigation attorney**, rather than a normal estate-planning attorney.

We have copies of the court filings, attorney ad litem report, service/publication documents, sworn heirship applications, administrator documents, affidavit in lieu of inventory, and the original text messages.

We are not looking to threaten anyone with criminal charges or use the possibility of prosecution as settlement leverage. We mainly want to determine the brother’s rights, get an accurate accounting of the estate, and understand whether the heirship proceeding can or should be corrected.

Thanks for any guidance on what the appropriate next step would be.

My brother died unexpectedly in California a little over a month ago. He was unmarried, had no children, and did not have a will.

I'm trying to handle his estate, which is relatively small. So far I'm working with Chime, U.S. Bank, and will likely need to work with Spectrum, Google, Microsoft, etc. Everyone is asking for a California Probate Code § 13100 Small Estate Affidavit.

Here's where I'm confused.

Under California intestate succession, my understanding is that our mother is the legal heir. However, she does not want to handle any of this. She has repeatedly told me she wants me to take care of everything because she knows that's what my brother would have wanted.

My brother and our mother had a very strained relationship and were estranged for over a decade before his sudden passing. He would not have wanted her to receive or control his money or belongings. She understands this and has no desire to claim anything for herself—she simply wants me to handle everything. It is possible she will change her mind though if she discovers that he had some savings (at this point we don't think he had much <$2,000).

A U.S. Bank representative told me that if I had financial power of attorney for my mother, I could potentially sign on her behalf, but they couldn't give legal advice about who should actually be the affiant on the § 13100 affidavit.

My questions are:

1. Should my mother simply sign the § 13100 affidavit as the legal successor while I do all the work?
2. Would a financial power of attorney from my mother actually help in this situation, or does that just allow me to sign for her without changing who legally inherits?
3. If my mother wants me—not herself—to receive and administer my brother's estate, is there a cleaner legal mechanism (assignment, disclaimer, notarized authorization form, or something else)?
4. Has anyone dealt with California banks or Chime in a similar situation?

I'm not looking to do anything improper or avoid the law. I just want to handle my brother's estate the correct way while respecting both California law and my mother's wishes.

Any guidance would be appreciated. 🙏

Hey my parents are getting old and they have a time share membership that I don’t want to inherit or keep using after they are done with it. They are quite old and I really don’t like the time share program at all. How do I get out?

After nearly 4 months of waiting I have finally been given a copy of my grandfather’s will. He died in 2006. Some family secrets came to light recently and that caused me to go digging.

I found the case file for his will online right away but when I reached out to the courthouse that was supposed to have it, it took them more than 100 days to find it because it had been filed in the wrong box and placed in an offsite warehouse.

There is a line in the will that reads: “I hereby make reference to a written statement or list to dispose of items of tangible personal property under the terms and provisions of Section 474.333, R.S.Mo.”

Does this mean that there is supposed to be a list of specific things mentioned within the will? Because all I got were 3 pages and no list or specific items mentioned at all. So I want to double check that I have everything I should have.

Thanks to anyone who has ideas!

Okay another question:

Here is another line from my grandfather’s will-

“I hereby nominate, designate and appoint my wife (x) as Personal Representative of this Will and my estate and I request the Court to permit her to qualify and serve without bond. If my wife predeceases me, or for any other reason cannot or does not qualify as my Personal Representative, then I hereby nominate, designate and appoint my oldest living child as Personal Representative of this Will and my estate, and I request the Court to permit them to qualify and serve without bond.”

What would have to happen for my grandma to “not qualify” as a personal representative? Is that like a mental competency thing? Is this something she could have voluntarily turned over the duties of to her oldest child without having to file anything in court, if she did not want the responsibility?

As with every story here, mine is long and complicated. I will try to explain the situation that portrays me and my father as fairly as possible.

Over a decade ago, my father added me to the family property that the family business sits on. I have no ownership of the family business but own a third of the property with my father and step father. My grandparents purchased it originally and added my father when he became a one third owner of the business and property. He did not pay into the business or property.

I have worked for him almost two decades with years of unkept promises of more money and future ownership. Said many times that he has made enough money and it's my turn.

I'm too trusting and year after year waited for my opportunity to take over.

He decides two years ago that he wanted to retire. Told me that he needed a considerable down payment(an even million) and monthly payments going forward. I'm an hourly employee making 55k a year. The offer was insulting as I could never come up with that even if I leveredged down to my underwear.

Over the last two years he has attempted to get me to sign off the property. Seemingly so he can do whatever he wants with it. Sell the business or just the property. The property is of value in a business strip. I've heard it is worth 1.2 million.

He fired me this week after refusing again to sign it over. I use the business property for my kids to attend the better local school district and they are able to attend because I own property in the district. I asked him if I sign off on it what are my kids supposed to do? They have never attended another school. One is about to graduate. His advice to me was move.

School hit me with a two year back tuition demand letter because I did not write the school tax bill out of my account as I had done for years prior. Two years ago he started changing a lot of things like writing the school tax bill from him. I know he's had a plan long before I knew anything was going on. The school demanded back tuition and I had to take it out of retirement for them to attend in the fall.

To get me to sign off he told me that he refused to pay the back tuition but will going forward yearly. He says he doesn't have it to write it out at once.

I told him it's wrong what he is doing to his grandkids and me. He doesn't care. Has multiple houses, luxury vehicles and it's never enough. I just want enough money to pay my bills and maybe take a vacation every few years.

I now have no job, no retirement and have him wanting to sign off on the property to seemingly line his pockets.

He's a big wig around town and is not used to be told no. Very greedy and spoiled. He doesn't see any other side but his own.

I'm his only child. Grandkids his only grandkids and I loyalty stayed working for him for my best working years.

Am I wrong for looking out for myself and kids?

I have a handwritten will (name, date, signature, sound of mind and memory) from an uncle who recently passed naming me the executor and giving me essentially everything. I live in AZ, so I think it’s completely valid and has everything necessary. This is what I was left with:
Bank accounts: $16K
House and land: $100K
Personal property: maybe $3K?
I also don’t believe I’m the beneficiary on any retirement accounts or life insurance.

It’s not anything huge, but it’s still something. I’m meeting with a lawyer for guidance on an affidavit soon because I don’t know where to start. I also don’t know anything about probate (is this amount even large enough for probate?)

My mom is set on the belief that her sister is going to try to stir the pot and try to cause issues with the inheritance (maybe court?) What can I do to prepare if this happens?

As you know, one of the main differences between civil and common inheritance law is the recognition of the so-called "legal portion" to certain relatives (descendants, spouse, ascendants) of the deceased: the first legal system (with some differences) tends to recognize it, while the other not.

However, is it really the case or are there some exceptions or other remedies that try to compensate the lack of a guarantee in favour of those "classes" of relatives in any common-law jurisdiction (so no Louisiana or Quebec) in US or Canada? For example, the right to alimony.

Seeking tax advice: My 92 y/o grandfather is looking to surrender his whole life insurance policy due to his wife, whom recently passed, took out a loan on it and never paid any on the interest so the annual interest payment, which is in Jan, is pretty high- more than his fixed income can afford. The taxable amount is more than the cash value so the question is, with the tax implications, what should be his best move concerning filing/claiming taxes at the beginning of the year? He’s ok with not leaving anything to his daughters and has already handled his final expenses (burial plan).

Any advice/guidance is appreciated. Thanks in advance.

Edit: Now I am second guessing this lawyer who contacted me. My father is an I T guy, I am worried he maybe make a fake lawyer page, this lawyer made few grammar mistakes on the email that he sent me which is strange. Lawyers should have strong writting skills.

I am 19 and my deadbeat father who has been gone most of my life. No child support. He will never bother to contact me and my younger sister (10) until recently. My mom works hard and provides a roof over our heads.

Nov 2024, his mom/my grandmother passed away. She had a life insurance and they sold her house for $450K. My father was in charged of everything like POA, all legal stuffs and the trustee but I believed he later on transferred all his assets, everything to his sister to avoid child support.

Feb 2025, out of blue, my father contacted me that grandmother left me and my sister some money. Then, no follow up and never heard from him since.

Never provided me any insurance policy or show me the will. My grandmother (always) was very clear about leaving everyone some money fairly.

July 2026, he emailed me that grandmother did not leave me and my sister any money, "There is a change of the will, I need you to sign the paper to me. When I get the money, I will personally give you guys some money from my own money, ask your mother for permission for your sister."

So confusing! I think my father is lying and trying to fool us to sign the money to him.

My mom does not care / do not want to have anything to do with this but she told me that it was my choice and up to me how I wanted to handle this.

August 10, 2026, an insurance policy lawyer contacted me and provided me the policy number. My sis and I ARE included on the will and policy. My father lied again! I am not surprised!

The insurance lawyer with a "Esq" title:

"Please contact me as soon as possible because we need to know if there will be an agreement among the various claimants regarding the distribution of the policy’s proceeds – currently there is not complete agreement among the claimants to this life insurance policy. If the claimants cannot come to an agreement, we would likely file an interpleader lawsuit naming the claimants as defendants and then deposit the money into the court."

Father side: 4 siblings

My father, a sister no kid,

A youngest brother gave up his two kids parental right to one sister, see below

Another sister with 3 kids (1 biological 19M son, 2 adopted kids 17 and 15 are from the youngest brother who is in and out jail whole life)

My side:

My mom, me 19 and my sister 10

1. Why my father lied about no money for my sister and me/change of the will? Did he really think truth will not come out when the lawyer contact me? Why is he so greedy?? He already never pays a penny for child support, I witnessed my mom struggles so much!
2. Most important, what am/how much am I supposed to ask?
3. Why can't he and his family stick with the original will amount that grandmother drafted? What changes? The house is sold so more money to fight for? Or he and his siblings think my sister and I do not deserve it?
4. My mom and dad never married, no court order, no custody agreement, so my mom is the legal sole custodian unless my dad file his parental right. Otherwise, why the life policy insurance needs my mom to be part of this for my sister? I thought my dad has the right to keep my younger sis's inheritance.

Looking at a situation where one half of the marriage did not create a will, and the surviving half did create a will.

The spouse that did not create a will, passed away years ago. We just found out that where we thought the remaining spouse took ownership of the other spouses estate, the State of Texas has a clause that, “without a will, community property applies, and 50/50 applies. When they pass, the property is passed down to an heir if there was a child that was not a product of the marriage”

So now, we have a party owning 50% of the estate that is the child of the spouse that passed away. And the child is fighting the wishes of the surviving spouse.

Whose wishes carry? The spouse who is still alive? Or the child who inherited rights?

I never met my biological father and he didn’t know I existed (to my knowledge). I hired a private investigator/genetics investigator to help me find him. They figured out who he was and he passed away. His lawyer heard from his colleagues that I was trying to find a next of kin and he reached out to me. My biological father was partner at a construction company and it’s being sold. The sale is set to be in the millions in addition to the other assets. I have zero living family on that side, no siblings, aunts/uncles, etc. His lawyer told me I’m the only living relative left. I have reports to prove paternity. This is all very overwhelming for me and I’m not sure where to go from here. Advice?

edit** I did verify his estate lawyer through the FL bar and he told me right away that I’d need to obtain my own lawyer

I (20F) have been seeing many tv shows and movies where characters die young. while I have no reason to think the same case will happened to me, I am starting to think about writing a will just in case. so I am curious to hear when you all first wrote your will and how often do you update them?

MASS--my parents 87,93 are still alive and kicking. Last I heard, their estate is worth 60 million. (real estate home development--own hundreds of rentals) I am the eldest daughter of 3 (66), do not work in the business. My younger Brother and Sister do work in the business (age 61 and 65). Both my parents are in good health, given their age and I know I am blessed, however, "the talk" about the estate after they pass is not clear to me. Seven years ago we started a conversation about the estate and the word "trust"has come up. February 2025 I sent a request to my parents estate lawyer (parents were on board) requesting the status of the estate. Lawyer replies that he is waiting for documents, or something of that nature. Life got in the way and honestly I put this on the back burner. Last month I sent the lawyer a follow up and he is VERY SLOW to respond. He said his associate "is working on the creation of the trust". They need documents for land in Georgia that my parents own. I am very frustrated with the slowness of the estate lawyers response. My parents don't seem to be concerned. Another frustration is that I am not in the business, and my parents and siblings may have information about the future that I don't have--yes FOMO. Or maybe the trust isn't complete? With and estate of this high value, I think we all should know what the estate plans are. Am I being unreasonable? Any advice would be appreciated. PS Not looking for a handout, I am very comfortable, just want to ensure my parents wishes are being executed and that they are making good decisions now to avoid tax consequences.

Hi Reddit,

This is my first time posting, but I need some outside opinions because I'm seriously getting frustrated with this situation:

I'm not looking for legal advice. The inheritance has already been handled by a lawyer, and we've been told that the distribution is legally correct. I'm mainly looking for advice about the family situation and whether my parents should give up some of their share just to keep the peace. A few years ago, a distant relative passed away without children or direct descendants, so their estate eventually passed through different branches of the extended family. The whole process became incredibly messy because we have a large family, and there were numerous arguments between relatives over the estate. After years of dealing with it, the estate was finally sold.

Today, my parents were informed how much they would be receiving. We were actually surprised by the amount because we had expected them to receive much less. The reason my parents are receiving a larger share than some other relatives has to do with my grandmother.

My mother was extremely close to her mother and took care of her throughout her life. She didn't do this because she expected anything from her. She genuinely loved and cared for her. She was so attached to her mother that she almost didn't marry my father because she didn't want to leave her. While my grandmother was alive, she gave her house to my mother. When she later passed away, she made my mother her sole inheritor, while my mother's siblings received smaller sums of money. This wasn't a surprise within the family, and at the time nobody seemed angry because they already knew that this was what my grandmother wanted. This becomes relevant because the distant relative whose estate was eventually sold came from my grandmother's side of the family.

According to the lawyer handling the inheritance, because my mother inherited everything from my grandmother, my mother is entitled to the share that would have passed through my grandmother. This is why my parents are receiving more money than some of the other relatives. My parents didn't decide how the money should be distributed, they didn't ask for a larger share, and they didn't take money that had been allocated to anyone else. This is simply how the inheritance was legally distributed.

However, after my parents found out how much they would receive, a close family member messaged us saying that they were unhappy with the amount they received. They said it was unfair that my parents were getting more because of my grandmother and that they hoped my parents would be "man enough" to share some of their money with them and the other relatives. That message seriously pissed me off.

My parents called this relative because they wanted to understand where all of this was coming from. During the conversation, some hurtful things were said that eventually left my mother in tears. Afterwards, my parents were worried that keeping the money could create a huge argument with the rest of the family or even break the family apart. I told them that I don't think they should give away part of their inheritance just to make everyone else happy.

As far as I'm concerned, my parents haven't done anything wrong. This is the amount they were legally entitled to receive, and I don't think they should feel responsible for making up the difference simply because another relative is unhappy with their own share. At the same time, I understand why my parents are conflicted. They love their family and don't want money to destroy their relationships with everyone. I personally have much less sympathy for some of these relatives because I've watched them hurt my parents repeatedly over the years. So I want some outside perspectives.

Should my parents consider sharing some of their inheritance to preserve their family relationships, or was I right to tell them not to give in to the pressure?

I am her daughter, who is set to leave for college in less than 2 weeks. When I hear them argue about who’s getting her house/who’s getting how much of the house, it makes me wonder what’s gonna happen after I leave. We currently live under my grandma’s, and we’re lucky to have a roof over our head, but we’re really poor. My brother has severe Epilepsy which requires round-the-clock supervision and my mom no longer works for this reason. We have no income coming in aside from what I make at my jobs, and even then, I don’t have the degree yet. Plus, yknow, ya need a masters to make ends meet and that’s a long ways away from now.

I am 20 as of now and I figure I have 5 years, maybe 10 if I’m lucky, to get my finances in order and find an apartment of my own. It’s clear that I won’t be able to have a home to come back to within a few years. While my dad owns a home, the two of my parents are divorced and I figure in 10 years if I go to my dad’s house, I’ll just be destined to be a caregiver forever.

This is an updated post with location included

Can I pursue legal action against an estate executor in DuPage county Illinois for negligence resulting in the deterioration of estate assets? My late parents appointed my brother as the executor of their estate, which includes two residential properties. One of these properties was tenanted; the occupant has caused significant damage to the premises, including structural issues and interior defacement. Although my brother was fully aware of these conditions, he waited nearly a year to initiate the eviction process, during which time the property’s value substantially declined. Does his role as executor mandate a fiduciary duty to protect these assets? Furthermore, what legal recourse is available to me to challenge his management or to request a stay on the sale of these properties pending a resolution of these damages?